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Baz! Hurry! The scones have already been served!

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rainbow rowell just casually confirming simon and baz are married with absolutely no warning 😭

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wait a fucking second.

did they seriously change the title of a 14 year old video????

oh my fuckin God.

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Me core

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My favourite trope has to be:

I sacrificed myself to save you. I didn't plan to survive. I burnt all the bridges. I intended to break your heart with my death, but that would be all right, because I wouldn't be around to see you. I pretended that you'll mourn me for a while and move on. I convinced myself I was going down in the blaze of glory. That my deed was appreciated. That everything was going to be all right afterwards, and I didn't need to be there to see it.

But I survived. And now I have to look you in the eye. I have to pick up the pieces of the life I shattered and figure out how to put it back together. If it can be done at all.

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Hi folks! And thank you @artsyunderstudy and @thewholelemon for the tags!

My second WIP day in a row. WTF is going on? Well, I might not be around much the next couple of weeks, so I'm throwing an offering into the ring before then.

Next week is @carryon-disability-week, and right now the first chapter of my contribution, Hope Springs Eternal, is with my beta! It's kind of a Fallout AU, but I take a lot of creative liberties (such as magic existing). No pre-existing knowledge will be needed.

Still haven't decided what day to post, but keep an eye out for it!

Here's a snippet from the first chapter.

I lean against the outer wall and ease myself to the ground, peeling paint following me down. The bare, dusty soil makes soft bedding for the seed. I make a small dent with the tip of my finger, then drip water from my flask. The water pools like the very earth can’t abide the sweetness of it. I set my violin on my lap, running fingertips across the varnished body. A pre-War instrument, host to the tiny knicks and scratches gathered over generations, it’s no longer capable of the feats it once was. While it is fully stringed (and I carry spares), they are poor quality, spun by ill-kept machines and self-taught hands. They carry a tune well enough, but lack the finesse required for nuanced spellworking.  This is a little frivolous, but I’m about to bed down for the evening and have had little need for magic today. The spell is ambitious, but I’m well-practised, and I’m eager to try with a newly-revived bow.  First, a silencing spell. I can do this with my bow and spoken words alone. Then I tuck my violin under my chin and raise the bow.  A gunshot stills my breath.

Tags below the cut!

@artsyunderstudy @facewithoutheart @captain-aralias @raenestee @cutestkilla

@ivelovedhimthroughworse @larkral @stitchyqueer @you-remind-me-of-the-babe

@ileadacharmedlife @confused-bi-queer @aristocratic-otter @whogaveyoupermission @nightimedreamersworld

@fatalfangirl @thewholelemon @onepintobean @shrekgogurt @theearlgreymage

@martsonmars @blackberrysummerblog @orange-peony @valeffelees @j-nipper-95

@rimeswithpurple @wellbelesbian @imagineacoolusername @youarenevertooold @iamamythologicalcreature

@supercutedinosaurs @alexalexinii @bookish-bogwitch @cosmicalart @bazzybelle

@theotherhufflepuff @that-disabled-princess @prettygoododds @mooncello @noblecorgi

@roomwithanopenfire @emeryhall @monbons @brendughh @run-for-chamo-miles

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Celebrity/Social Media AU - Part 32

Previous Part: Part 31

Next Part: Part 33

The full AU is now posted on my ao3!

Simon

Making my way backstage during the concert is definitely the worst part of my day. I nearly get lost, even though I’ve done walked the opposite way only about two hours ago and someone who works here gave me clear and detailed instructions. When I arrive in Baz’s dressing room, Keris, who is in charge of all of Baz’s and his musician’s stage outfits, immediately points at a pair of slacks and a crisp white shirt. “Put them on, quick.”

I would not dare risk disobeying her. She looks stressed. Everyone who works with Baz on his tour looks stressed.

The clothes fit me perfectly, and yet, I’ve never tried them on before, but I wouldn’t be surprised if Baz had my clothing sizes memorised, so.

“You should have makeup on if you’re going on stage,” Keris comments, as she rolls up my sleeves artfully.

“Nah, there’s no time for that,” I say. I purposely left the show very late so there would be no time for makeup. I don’t want any of that stuff on my face, it’s itchy. “I should go now, he’s going to finish the song soon.”

“You’re right. Just one last thing… Turn around please.”

When I do, she tucks in my shirt more than I had, then untucks it a little. “Perfect. Go.”

…And I now have to do more walking around.

Thankfully, the distance is not so big this time, and there are people to guide me. They all look even more stressed than Keris. I don’t think the people who work with him are very happy with Baz’s latest idea… I feel bad for them, but I, for one, am too excited about his idea to be fully compassionate.

I’m right behind the stage now, and Baz has finished his songs. Normally, he moves on straight to the next one, but tonight, Agatha, Niamh, Dev and Niall all stop playing.

“Hey, so…” His voice quickly get drowned out by people cheering. I peek to watch the audience. He waits for them to have gotten a little less loud to continue. “So… London… We know each other very well, you and I… I live in this city. I’ve lived in this city for a long time, but for a few years, I’ve lived in this city with someone very special… Someone who is here, tonight.”

Though none of their faces are clear from this far away, I can tell people in the public turn towards the VIP area, where I was sitting a few minutes ago. Of course, some of them already knew I was here. I even had a few people come and talk to me, like I was the celebrity, it was odd but not totally unpleasant.

While they were busy trying to find me, someone brought the chair that, in a matter of two shows, has become very famous in his fandom. It’s now placed behind him.

“No… Not over there… He’s here tonight,” Baz says, with emphasis. I can hear the smile in his voice a few seconds before I see it as he turns to me, extending a hand.

The crowd goes wild. Loud cheering and clapping accompany my entrance.

Once I’m close enough, I take Baz’s hand. Mine is sweaty. It is intimidating standing in front of tens of thousands of people. I don’t know how Baz does it so confidently.

He mouths ‘Hi, love,’ as he squeezes my hand before holding his mic up to his lips again. “My partner, my muse… My Simon. Everyone, say hello to Simon,” he says, pointing the microphone at the public, who scream in return. “Good. See, it’s not so hard being well-behaved?”

More cheering. They love it when he’s flirty with them. (I could not blame them).

“Simon is going to help me with tonight’s performance, if you don’t mind.” With how loud they are, I doubt they mind. “I thought that I could do something special for the last shows of this incredible tour, the shows in this city that is so dear to me. I hope you’ll like my surprise, London!”

And with that, he pushes me down on the chair, hard enough to look good for the audience, but not so hard that the chair –or I– will fall.

At the same time, the band starts playing the first notes of Hands Down. A song from the first album he wrote about me. The dirtiest song on the first album he wrote about me.

He puts the mic back on the stand, switching to his headset microphone.

Sit back and enjoy. Touch me if you feel like it. That’s all the instructions he gave me when he exposed his idea to me. Which is really no instructions at all. And he didn’t tell me what he was going to do in any specific way, so I’m discovering his ‘surprise’ for London with the same excitement as the audience.

At first, it’s rather tame. He walks around the chair, singing the first verse of the song. The tips of his fingers are dragging along my collarbones, the top of my arms, my shoulder blades. Teasingly.

I’m focusing on the lyrics as much as on what he’s doing, and it makes me realise that that is what he does in the song too, in the first verse. It’s all teasing. He’s using that sexy, sultry voice, he sings a little slowly, drags the ends of some of his words, none of which are overtly sexual yet.

Then, as his lyrics become more explicit, so does his performance.

He’s behind me, and he drags his hands down my chest, until his fingers reach the waistband of my trousers. He lowers his head to, angling it as if he was whispering in my ear. His hands are slower on their way back up. They play with the top button of my shirt, to eventually undo it. And the one underneath it too. He places his lips close to my neck, to mime kissing it. I shiver all the same as I feel his breath on my skin.

He straightens up. He walks around the chair again until he’s in front of me. Almost mechanically, my legs open wider, something that I may feel ashamed about later. Not now, though. Absolutely not now. Because now he’s in front of me, singing those scandalous lyrics, looking better than he ever has. Because now he’s brought me in front of the crowd of his sold-out Wembley Stadium concert to show me off.

Because now he’s going down on his knees, in the space I just freed.

Jesus fucking Christ.

It’s the first time since his performance began that I notice the audience. The sounds they just made could probably be heard on the other side of the city. His hands are back on me, on my knees and then up my thighs. If he was actually going to… his lips would be following. He loves kissing my thighs. It’s his favourite spot for hickeys.

Instead, because having his face between my thighs might be too sexual even for him –or perhaps because he wants to spare me the embarrassment of getting hard on stage– he keeps his head right where it is, and looks up at me, with an intensity in his eyes that makes me feel hot all over.

For the final part of his song, he stands back up, only long enough to sit on my lap. To straddle one of my legs, more accurately. They’re too far apart for him to fit on both at the same time.

His own leg is practically pressed to my crotch, simply because it’s too damn long for it to fit in any other way, which is not helping lower my body temperature.

He’s rolling his hips now, like he does when he’s riding me. Same pace, too. One of his hands is toying with a button of my shirt he hasn’t undone and the other is on my shoulder, for balance.

He leans in, as if he was kissing me, but he doesn’t, of course he doesn’t, he’s singing, but my body reacts all the same. One of my hands holds the dip of his back, to keep him close, and the other flies up to his neck, fingers tangling in his hair. He smiles, and it changes the way he sings. I think I could die, right here and now. I know we’re in front of a whole stadium of people, but that moment feels so intimate, so beautiful.

Already, much too soon, he gets to the end of song. I don’t want it to be over yet. God, couldn’t he write a 20-minute song?

The last lyrics are sung close to my face, his breath brushing my lips.

And when he finishes, he kisses me. Actually kisses me.

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Celebrity/Social Media AU - Part 31

Previous Part: Part 30

Next Part: Part 32

Guys I think I might actually finish writing that fic tonight😭😭

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Sabrina addresses the hate Jack Antonoff has been receiving lately (from Rolling Stone, June 2024)

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Always appreciate your tags, @roomwithanopenfire @run-for-chamo-miles 🫶🫶🫶

Its a day late i know but finally i have something to share again

So, back in 2022, I made a we dont talk about the mage parody of the Encanto song, posted it here, and days after that, I started writing other parodies including Taylor Swift songs. The thing is after 2 full years, they are still WIPs. And i kinda need to finish one of them now because I promised @yoursecho one and they shall have it!!

So here are SIX SENTENCES (lines but whatever im proud its six) to pressure myself:

Im in the woods with your girlfriend she's upset

You know I really didn't get a things she said

'Cause she uses actual words unlike you...

You're in our room it's a typical Tuesday night

I'm eating my crisps and you glare as I take my bite

But I'd rather, lick your face and suck you...

Also, I've been so so invested recently in @philaet0s ' Social Media au that it literally spiked my interest again on tumblr, I thought maybe I'd try to give lyrics into one of Baz's songs.

And look, when i saw the part where baz and niall flirts on stage, i immediately thought of Troye Sivan's performance with Ross Lynch. (how could you not??) So the lyrics are based on the melody of his song, One Of Your Girls (the mv is good too, its soo raw)

Your hand, so rough so heavy

Yes god, both cheeks they're burning

Look at you

Have me drowning in your ocean blue

Taste the drip off our honey dew

Give me a blow if i ever defy you

Come and play, I'll be your toy

aaa! The vibes of these two parodies are so different. Whenever i do the ts one, it's like hacking Baz's hormonal mind, and it's easy in the sense that i know that teen! Baz could go full cringe. But the professional singer! Baz, well I'm saying sorry in advance if i can't hack it😆

Tags and hellos, @ic3-que3n @raenestee @cutestkilla @supercutedinosaurs @hertragedyconnoisseur

@comesitintheclover @hushed-chorus @ionlydrinkhotwater @wellbelesbian @palimpsessed

@martsonmars @that-disabled-princess @plantsnpeace @you-remind-me-of-the-babe @youarenevertooold

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Keep his heavenly body warm

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Celebrity/Social Media AU - Part 30

Previous Part: Part 29

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Celebrity/Social Media AU - Part 27

Previous Part: Part 26

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"Simon Snow is wearing [...] the baggiest pair of JNCOs Baz has ever seen in his life."

-Gareth Surname Band by the incomparable, most wonderful birthday girl @shrekgogurt

Happy Birthday Mary!! In honour of this most auspicious day I had to bring Simon in his JNCO jeans (and his Marky Mark shirtless backward baseball cap energy) to life. This appearance in Teen Beat is not canonical but COME ON he belongs there (and taped to Baz's mirror courtesy of @artsyunderstudy)!!! I love you so dearly and I hope you have the most wonderful birthday that all the best people except Julius Ceasar were born on!

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Maybe something like this for snowbaz 👉👈🥺

New Carry On prompt!