blergeatkitty
I Am A Starving Autist
536 posts
53M | Neurodiverse | Puns are my happy placeDe more you encourage me diverse it gets. Left-handed INTJ AuDHD geek dad. Solipsist demiurge. Bipedal. Featherless. Unfashionable. Unseasonable. Unstoppable. Incorrigible. Mostly symmetrical. Somewhat intractable. Often articulate. Always articulated. Invariably variable. Highly unlikely. Likably theoretical. Theoretically lickable. Like mountains, occasionally overlooked. Looking for friend-shaped beings and community. I am a full-spectrum biotic located somewhere between a Nowhere Man and an Everyman on a scale of 380-750nm. Please be nice.
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
blergeatkitty · 11 months ago
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Kitten Hitsurugi Miu! Ryūshōsen!
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blergeatkitty · 11 months ago
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Someone could knit a tiny little hat and put it on the bird’s head and I bet it would very much appreciate fitting in with the other hat-wearing birds.
A bird among birds
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blergeatkitty · 11 months ago
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Aw, that’s lovely, that is, Seeing the old Internet Oracularities dynamic, even if it’s out of place and just for a second. Brilliant.
It’s like seeing a past Doctor Who actor making a guest appearance on a new episode, I get all teary-eyed and nostalgic just thinking about it.
Now make with the child sacrifice, @natingtoncat, we haven’t got all day.
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tech illiterate people are the funniest thing
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blergeatkitty · 11 months ago
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It’d be so cool if humans could figure out how to talk to other humans.
You know, like without killing them or treating them like crap.
Humpback whale "conversations" provide valuable insight on how humans may one day communicate with life beyond Earth.  Researchers from the SETI Institute, University of California Davis and the Alaska Whale Foundation recently "conversed" with a humpback whale named Twain using an underwater speaker and recorded a humpback "contact" call. Twain responded to the researchers' call by matching the interval variations between signals of each playback call over a 20-minute period.  If you're having a Star Trek flashback, yes, this is awfully reminiscent of that one film in which the crew receives alien whale transmissions that can only be decoded underwater. And in fact, mirroring our sci-fi fantasies, this demonstration of interspecies communication has implications for the search for extraterrestrial intelligence, according to a statement from the SETI Institute. 
Continue Reading.
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blergeatkitty · 11 months ago
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Too many foots
Not enough shooz
Himbs shoes too big for himbs feet
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blergeatkitty · 11 months ago
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She got married shortly after this photo got taken.
I hear she had a great reception.
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Nyíregyháza, Hungary, 1978. (Fortepan)
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blergeatkitty · 11 months ago
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You’ve heard of elf on a shelf
Now get ready for bitchy snitch with a minty stitch
do you ever just turn your candy canes into prison shanks like…
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blergeatkitty · 11 months ago
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From a link off the Toxicity section of the kidney bean’s Wikipedia page:
“Phytohaemagglutinin (PHA, or phytohemagglutinin) is a lectin found in plants, especially certain legumes. PHA actually consists of two closely related proteins, called leucoagglutinin (PHA-L) and PHA-E. These proteins cause blood cells to clump together. PHA-E cause erythrocytes (red blood cells) to clump. PHA-L causes leukocytes (white blood cells) to clump. Phytohaemagglutinin has carbohydrate-binding specificity for a complex oligosaccharide containing galactose, N-acetylglucosamine, and mannose.[2]”
And now I want to make a t-shirt with “Galactose The Intolerant, Devourer of Worlds” on it.
And maybe a crest or coat of arms of some kind with a kidney bean and cleansing fire motif that reads “Stay calm or perish” above and “Rage powers my survival” below.
In Latin.
nothing in the world makes me more evil than just being kind of annoyed
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blergeatkitty · 11 months ago
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If you’re morbidly afraid of heights, “I’d dive for you” would be a contender.
For those with a deathly allergy to vinegar “I’d dill for you” would be one hell of difficult kink.
Equally valid is the burlesque performer risking anaphylactic shock who tells their partner “I’d olive for you”.
As a side note, the alternate universes where these were each the hardest of all were also ones where Bryan Adams had a difficult 1991.
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blergeatkitty · 11 months ago
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Oncoming Storm. Ugh.
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blergeatkitty · 11 months ago
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I think it would be legitimately awesome if someone hacked a pair of augmented reality lenses to auto-detect ads in your field of vision and just blank them out like an ad blocker but like for physical ads.
I’m tired of advertising. All of it. I don’t want any ads even for things I like. Even if I would 100% buy it. It’s INSANE that we just accept that people can throw a business flier in our face at any time of day in any setting. Aren’t you mad? Don’t you just want to go apeshit?
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blergeatkitty · 11 months ago
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Ok, what about your other three wishes?
i wish ads felt pain when you skipped them
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blergeatkitty · 11 months ago
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“Dad, if I ever want your best comeback I’ll just punch mom in the stomach until she vomits.”
growing up the rule was we were allowed to be openly disrespectful and rude to dad, but only if it was funny. if it flopped then we would have to endure a lecture about where we went wrong and what might have made it funnier. or, alternately, he would just say, "oh yeah? well i fucked your mom" which there aren't a lot of comebacks for.
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blergeatkitty · 11 months ago
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R.M. Renfield is an average person and therefore eats zero spiders per day.
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blergeatkitty · 11 months ago
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Chekov’s Schrödinger’s Occam’s razor gun cat: If Ensign Chekov is shown with a gun outside a barbershop filled with razors, the simplest explanation is that he will later wind up deliberately not using it when it would be entirely sensible for him to use the gun, get shot dead, then wind up not actually having been shot dead. Because he was thinking about pussy.
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imagination (1963) - harold ordway rugg
"chekhovs cat / schrödingers razor / occams gun"
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blergeatkitty · 11 months ago
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BE NOT AFRAID
BE VERY VERY NOT AFRAID
pro lifer blocked me on twitter for asking this but if embryos have souls, and then they're aborted, exactly how sapient are they in the afterlife? Are they forever doomed to float around with no thoughts in their heads? Is it like just animal intelligence like a little happy goldfish? Do they still have an embryonic form? I've always seen an assumption that child souls are still in child form so I guess so. Do the other people in the afterlife keep abortions as little pets? Will they stay in a fishbowl or are they too stupid + intangible and float right out again?
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blergeatkitty · 11 months ago
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Ok, everyone roll a Dexterity check and add your Dodge or Acrobatics if you have it. Anyone in a 20-foot 45-degree cone who fails takes 20d6 Fabulous damage.
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I was taking a picture of the rainbow on her muzzle and she yawned.
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