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ble4chmyhandz · 7 days ago

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Tipiskaw International High School Part 10

Beware that this story contains bullying, homophobia, mentions of abusive relationships, transphobia, mental health, heavy subject matter, PTSD, flashbacks. Please take care when reading.

My Dirty Little Secret, Who Has To Know?

Thursday morning had arrived, finally getting towards the end of yet another week. The weekend was the best; soon enough, Jake would be able to spend all day in the bakery with Miriam and Tom, just talking with two of his favourite people in the world while attempting to get some work done at the same time. Jake had his head in the clouds as he sat in the third lesson of the day, biology. He had been up until the early hours of the morning talking to Tom over the phone while he was lying in bed, all the while wishing that the boy was lying there next to him; as a result, he was so tired he could barely concentrate on anything, well, anything except for Tom. The class hadn’t yet started; Jake was sitting at a small table with three other people, Tom, of course, and sitting on the opposite side were Ally Amber and Hunter Page. The two were the sappiest lovebirds in their whole grade but nice enough people and friendly too. The blue-haired boy didn’t mean to, but he kept looking at Tom’s handsome face while the taller boy read a spy novel; he was seemingly obsessed with them. Jake kept thinking about how Connor had expressed his happiness at the success of the buddy system when he called Aiden and Jake into his office the previous week to see how things were progressing; regardless, the older man emphasised to still come to him if there were any issues or anything else that was worrying either of the boys. The only thing that was worrying Jake was the fear of his parents finding out that he was spending so much time with another gay young man, let alone one he was so madly in love with. The mad chatter in the backroom of the biology classroom further fuelled Jake’s mind-wandering thoughts of Tom’s strong arms, his kissable lips, his beautiful eyes, the ugly words his parents would use to describe him, the hatred in their voices, and them wishing that Jake had never been born—

“Morning, everyone! I’ve got a slightly more interesting lesson for you all today.” The class’s science teacher, Karol Jones, had just stepped into the room carrying many cardboard boxes all stacked one upon the other and completely hiding the woman behind them; if it wasn’t for her slightly annoying voice booming out across the classroom, no one would have a clue who it was carrying all of the packages. She was usually miserable and complaining about anything and everything, but today she seemed rather chipper and enthusiastic. The sudden sound of her voice had snapped Jake out of his daydreaming, only then realising just for how long he had been staring straight at Tom’s face while he was reading; Tom hadn’t noticed, luckily, too absorbed in flicking through the pages of his novel, then grabbing his rucksack to put the book away when the lesson had started to begin. Someone who had noticed the staring was Ally, giving Jake a knowing look from behind her black glasses and a suggestive smirk, then jabbing her boyfriend in the side to whisper something in his ear. Jake’s neutral face fell into being noticeably worried. Oh god, were people catching on? What if someone told his parents they had seen him getting so close with Tom? The smaller boy’s change in demeanour was clearly seen by the muscular lad sitting next to him, who then placed his strong hand over Jake’s shoulder to attempt to soothe what the black-haired boy had thought was a bit of anxiety. Jake showed his appreciation with a doe-eyed smile and by patting Tom’s hand where it sat on top of his shoulder; he could never bring himself to push Tom away. Physical touch was just Tom’s way of showing his support.

“Don’t you both look cosy together?” Ally had emphasised every syllable in her teasing sentence, leaning forward across the table towards the two boys, resting her head on her left hand, the comment making Jake blush wildly. Her tone was insinuating and filled with playfulness. “Shut the fuck up, Ally.” Jake muttered lowly, getting a chuckle out of Hunter, which Ally looked highly unimpressed about when she turned to look at her boyfriend’s laughing face. Tom knew Ally didn’t have any malicious intent and gave a light-hearted laugh at Jake’s defensiveness, pulling the short boy closer into his side. “I mean, we’ve been hanging out so much recently; I guess we are very close.” Oh Tom, so loveable but oh so oblivious sometimes… Jake mentally facepalmed as Ally continued giving him those irritating looks.

Karol barked her instructions across the classroom like an army sergeant. “Okay, there are twenty-four of you, so we’ll split you up into six groups of four. Hannah, Jade, Tristan and Benji, you’re group one; Ally, Hunter, Tom and Jake, you’re group two…” The teacher continued to put the teens into the respective groups and then commanded that one person from each group needed to come to the front of the classroom and grab a box that she had brought in and then take it back to their table and wait for her to bring over the tools needed for today’s class. Today’s lesson was learning about the human heart and all of its functions. The cardboard boxes contained hand-made models of hearts that were made of a plastic-silicone-gelatin-like substance, which made the models look highly… realistic. Benji had practically screamed like a child when he reached into his box before anyone was told what the boxes contained inside, reaching in without looking and feeling something ‘super squishy and gross’ then going as white as a sheet when Tristan turned the box on its side and an anatomically correct model of a heart fell onto the table with a splatter; there were even traces of faux blood for added realism.

Ally went to collect the box and was more than disgusted at the sight and was close to screaming when she felt the fleshy texture of the thing. Tom wasn’t the slightest bit fazed, seemingly, and grabbed the model and slapped it down onto the table below without much hesitation, getting some of the red fluid from the model on his hands in the process. While Ally tried to compose herself, Hunter was more morbidly intrigued, picking it up and holding it to the light like some kind of ancient artefact, studying the arteries and muscles. While he laughed at Ally being close to gagging, Jake wasn’t too bothered by the fake organ; he had watched enough horror and slasher movies when he was far too young to be doing so (thanks to Shawn). Jake just wanted the class to be over already so he and Tom could eat lunch together on the grass, and he could observe the way that the taller teen’s ocean eyes sparkled incandescently in the sun’s light. Upon turning to his scar-faced friend, Jake saw an immediate difference in Tom’s disposition. The tall boy was staring intently at his hands, watching the smeared red substance that was all over his fingers, his eyes looking wide and intense. Jake recalled what Tom had told him not long ago; it couldn’t be a pleasant thing to see after all the muscular boy had been through.

Thinking quickly, Jake reached into his bag and pulled out a small bottle of hand sanitiser. He didn’t hesitate to grab Tom’s hands and pull them towards him and then squeeze some of the gel onto Tom’s hands. Tom was still fixated on the red fluid on his digits, unblinking, breathing more heavily than usual. The ponytailed young man then rubbed his hands all over the top of Tom’s; the red fluid then smearing a bit more but soon enough starting to disappear as they were cleansed. “That’s much better, isn’t it, Tom? I hate it when my hands don’t feel clean too…” Jake commented very quietly, not wanting to draw anyone’s attention, still rubbing his hands against the taller boy’s. “Oh, y-yeah. Thanks, Jake.” Although he tried to hide it, Jake knew something wasn’t right for his friend. Jake still gripped onto Tom’s hands, and although the hand sanitiser was now dry, Tom’s hands were growing very clammy, his face looked more pale than usual, and there was sweat starting to bead on his forehead. “Tom? Are you okay?” Tom couldn’t respond with words, just nodding frantically as his eyes darted around the room, then seeing Jake was very much unconvinced when they both made eye contact again. “Tom. Don’t lie to me. If you need to leave, then you tell me or just walk out, okay?” The taller boy took a moment to ground himself, squeezing Jake’s soft and warm hand. Focusing on the touch of his skin rather than the whirlwind going on in his head. Tom’s eyes closed as he took a few deep breaths and then fluttered open once more, directly looking into Jake’s dark ones. “Yeah… okay. I’m feeling better now.”

Jake gave his dear friend an adoring smile and patted Tom’s muscular back. “You’re okay, big guy; everything will be fine.” Hunter and Ally hadn’t noticed a thing about what had just happened between Tom and Jake. Hunter was too busy pretending to throw the fake heart at his screeching girlfriend as she scurried back and forth, not wanting to feel the unpleasant texture of the model again. “Okay, everyone! I’m handing out the boxes that contain the tools now. They are clearly marked with what end you need to open first. These are professionally used items, and they need to be treated as such! Be very careful so you don’t hurt yourselves, all of you!” Karol was coming to ‘group one’s’ table first, and Hunter quickly put the heart back down on the table to avoid being scolded by his teacher, much to the relief of his somewhat horrified girlfriend. Karol then placed a small, rectangular white box on the table. The box had a single red arrow on the top of it, pointing to the end which needed to be opened first, the other end simply saying ‘Warning. Dangerous instrument’ on the other end. The box was about the size of a thin pencil case, made out of hard plastic and completely opaque, not giving any hint to what might lie inside of it. Jake picked up the box curiously and opened the appropriate end, peering inside and seeing a small silver handle.

The blue-haired boy gently teased the tool out from its confines and investigated it, feeling the cool metal in his warm hands. It was a fairly small scalpel with a razor-sharp edge; it glinted in the light of the classroom like polished glass. “Sick, dude. Let me hold it!” Hunter reached forward clumsily, being pulled back by Ally. “Hunter, it’s a knife. It’s fuckin’ dangerous, not a goddamn Pokémon card!” “I dunno, Ally, that thing is just as cool as a holographic Charizard, if you ask me…” Upon hearing the word knife leave Hunter’s lips, Jake heard a heaving breath come from the boy standing next to him. All the colour had drained from Tom’s face again, only this time he looked so much worse. The sweat on his forehead was now running down his face and neck in heavy drops; his eyes were blown wide, staring right at the metal in Jake’s grasp. Jake studied Tom for a few seconds; he was starting to shiver, shaking and trembling with increasingly heavy breaths. The black-haired young man’s mouth was wide open as he desperately gasped, trying to drink in the air around him, none of it getting into his chest as his lungs were feeling like they were burning. Tom’s hands gripped the table in a vice grip, his knuckles turning as white as his scarred face. The traumatised young man looked all around, seeing so many people holding the sharp metal instruments; even his teacher had one. All of a sudden he was in that room again, strapped to that chair, screaming and crying in agony for his mother to please come and save him…

“N-no… Put it away…” The tall, muscular boy muttered with a shaking voice, staring once again at the tool in Jake’s hand. Ally and Hunter had noticed the change in Tom’s body language, looking on with confusion. “Woah… Is he okay?” Hunter asked aloud, tactlessly, getting the attention of more and more of the students in the room; now there were so many eyes on Tom, and Jake realised he was still holding the thing! The blue-haired boy tossed it down onto the table as quickly as he could, the sharp sound of a metallic CLANK getting the attention of almost everyone at this point. Tom stepped back a bit, shuddering and wringing his hands together as he trembled. “Don’t…don’t hurt me…” Jake could feel his heart pounding in his chest while watching the other boy’s previously composed state crumble to dust right before his eyes. “I won't hurt you, Tom! I’d never hurt you! Please just –” Jake reached out to try and touch the other boy, to try and bring him back down to reality. Tom couldn’t respond in any other way than swiftly moving back again when Jake’s hand reached out for him, his breathing turning to panting, not unlike a dog trapped in a hot car. “Tom…what’s going on?” Jake was nearly thrown backwards by the outburst that rapidly came from Tom. “N-no… NO! PLEASE, NO!”

The taller boy ran off like a whippet, dashing straight for the sliding doors at the side of the biology classroom, flinging the sliding glass to the side and running off to find somewhere to hide. Jake looked around frantically, seeing all the staring eyes and then looking at his teacher. “I’m really sorry! We’ve got to go!” Before Karol could respond, Jake was already flying out of the door himself and dashing down the school’s main path, desperately looking left and right in an attempt to spot his friend. Jake searched for what felt like an eternity until his eyes fell onto the grassy verge that he and Tom so often ate together on. Tom was cowering under the shade of the tall oak tree, sobbing loudly and shaking like a leaf. Jake bolted right for him and crouched at his side, pulling him in for a tight hug. “It’s okay, Tom, you’re safe now! I’ve got you! I won’t let anything happen to you…” The boy continued to sob and stutter. “I-I’m…so-so s-s-sorry…” Jake had to use all of his might to not start crying too at the heartbreaking noises his crush was making. “What are you apologising for? You silly thing…” Tom turned to look at Jake, then pulled him in for an even tighter embrace. “I’m supposed to be the one looking after you!” Jake smiled and shushed the sobbing boy, rubbing gentle circles onto his back while his chest heaved. “It’s okay, big guy… Even superheroes like you need a little bit of help sometimes…”

Connor had clearly been alerted about the situation by Karol, running down the path like an Olympic sprinter and kneeling beside Tom once he spotted both of the lads. Reassuring Tom that he was safe now and not in any trouble. It had taken about half an hour for the distraught young man to fully calm back down, still clutching onto Jake with a tight grip as he shook and attempted to drink down some of the water Connor had brought with him. Once Tom was looking a bit better, with more control over his breathing, more colour in his cheeks and less of a tremble in his movements, both Jake and Connor helped lead him to the isolation room where Tom and Jake spent the rest of that Thursday. Lunchtime came along, but Tom couldn’t even bear to look at the miriam had prepared for him, let alone take a bite of it. Tom was slumped against the table, head resting on his arms with his eyes closed. Lethargic and wary, exhausted from all of the fear and panic, Jake thought he looked very similar to how Aiden had not too many days before. Word had travelled like wildfire about Tom’s episode, reaching the ears of his very concerned friends. Gabby and Ellie had texted him incessantly, asking if he was alright, but Tom was too drained to bring himself to reply to the girls. Aiden and James both rushed into the isolation room near the start of lunchtime to set their eyes upon Tom’s pitiful state, both boys being reluctantly ushered away by Connor when he came back in to check on Tom. Connor understood the concern of the e-boy and the Brazilian but reassured them that Tom was doing alright; he just needed some quiet time in a low-stimulation environment. As the final hours of school came slowly ticking by, Jake finally convinced Tom to take a few mouthfuls of his pre-made meal, having to literally spoon-feed him a little bit to get some nutrition and sustenance into the larger man. Jake had even managed to get Tom to laugh a bit when he started making light-heartedly childish aeroplane noises as the cutlery approached his mouth. It was fair to say that soccer practice was cancelled for Tom that night, his mother being called to pick him up early. Before leaving, Tom turned to give Jake the world's tightest hug, thanking the smaller boy for all that he had done for him that day. Jake told him not to mention it; Tom had gone above and beyond for him recently after all…

Jake left the isolation room not long after the school day’s final bell had rung out. Turning around to look back into the room, Connor had told him and Tom that it may be an idea to have the two boys spend all of Friday in there again, just so Tom wasn’t too overwhelmed and they both had a safe environment to do their schoolwork in. After walking out of the room’s backdoor and making his way to the main entrance to walk to the bakery, Jake knew he had to tell Miriam about what had happened today. She knew Tom well since he was a young child. She had to know something about his trauma; maybe she could give some advice on how best to deal with situations like this if they came about again in the future.

Just as Jake was walking out from the school’s gates, someone stepped out in front of him, stopping him right in his path. “Hey, Jake.” It was Riya; she had that awfully strong perfume on again, and her eyes had the sharpness of knives. Jake could almost feel them cutting into him when she looked him in the eye. “What do you want, you evil bitch?” Jake wasn’t in the mood, especially after what had happened to Tom today. Tom’s influence had given him much more confidence when it came to dealing with people who should really be keeping their mouths shut about him. Riya just laughed obnoxiously, but Jake knew inside that she was fuming at him for his response to her. “Oh my god, Hamilton, what if your best friend Connor heard you using such bad language?” Jake still wasn’t backing down, a hand on his hip. “He’d probably agree with me after some of the shit you’ve pulled. How were those detentions, by the way?” Jake gave her a shit-eating grin, and Riya glared at him again in return, stomping her way forward, jabbing him in the diaphragm and slightly knocking him backwards. “Oh yeah? Well, he would probably agree with me that the only reason that Tom is putting his neck out for you so much is as a favour to Connor for looking after him for so long after he got his skin shaved off!” Jake glared right back and pushed himself forward again, trying not to be intimidated by the girl or her words, but although he didn't want them to, her words had started to seep into his mind. Could she be right? Tom did say he would do almost anything for Connor after all of the support that the older man had given him when he was at his lowest.

“Y-you’re bullshitting. Why should I listen to you?” Riya’s face turned into something out of a nightmare. Manic and frightening, her brown eyes could make a rhino run away in fear. “Because deep down you know I’m right, Jake. Why the fuck would Tom care about someone like you? Think about it: all you’re known for here is being Blake’s sloppy seconds; you’re a washed-up loser. Tom is one of the top soccer players in the school; he could go professional if he wanted to. You are NOTHING compared to him; don’t you get that? How could he even want to get together with a pathetic little bitch like you?” Riya lunged forward and jabbed him right in the stomach, knocking the wind out of him and sending him crashing down to the rough, stony floor below. Tears stung at the corners of Jake’s dark eyes as he hit the floor, gritting his teeth as he tried to push through them. “What do you even mean? We don’t even like each other like that!” Riya tsked and crossed her arms, unconvinced. “Are you fucking kidding me? Everyone can see it, Jake. You’re a desperate whore. You’re madly in love with a man who could never feel the same way about you.” Each word was like a burning dagger to the heart and soul; tears were falling freely now. Riya turned around as if to leave, and Jake felt a bit of relief come over him, but she wasn’t done yet. “Hey, what if your parents found out about you chasing after another man like a lovesick puppy? What would they say? Just think about all of those things they called you last time you were with a guy.” Jake stared at the girl open-mouthed, air not being able to reach his lungs as he remembered. He had told Blake all about what his parents had said to him and what they had called him on that horrible night last August. Riya knew, and Jake knew that she was right. Riya didn’t look back around to see Jake’s face; she knew it would be a look of pure devastation. She finally started to make her way off to her car from the school grounds, calling out a final few words. “See you tomorrow, Jake. Have a good evening, now won’t you?”

Once the blue-haired young man knew that Riya was out of sight, he staggered back to his feet. Half-dazed and with a bit of blood trickling from his forearm, the limb having taken a lot of the impact when Jake hit the floor. The blue-haired young man staggered his way towards the small business; he still had a work shift to attend to. Every word that Riya had spoken whirled around and around in his mind like a flock of evil birds, pecking at each side of his brain with a sharp sting each time he remembered them. Jake walked into the bakery; Miriam immediately saw the dishevelled and distraught state of the boy she cared about so much. Jake rejected talking to her every time that Miriam tried to ask him what was wrong; she wouldn’t even let him behind the counter to serve the customers; he looked far too unwell for that.

Miriam sat him down on a table in the corner to hopefully have him come back to himself a bit and to take the opportunity to patch up his bleeding arm, but Jake still didn't say a word. Jake said nothing for a very long time; he stared into a seemingly endless void as he sat there, looking more like a zombie than the Jake Miriam knew. Riya was right; how could Tom ever love him? Everything he did was to pay Connor back for all of his help back in the day. It wasn’t even like Jake could even dare to be with Tom anyway; his parents would crucify him. Miriam came back over to him after half an hour to see if he was ready to talk, but the only thing Jake uttered was simply, “Can I be excused to the bathroom, please?” Miriam reluctantly agreed, not wanting to let him out of her sight, and watched the boy stagger with hay to the back of the shop. Upon opening the bathroom door, all of that emotion came flooding out of Jake; his knees went weak, and he could no longer hold up his own body weight. The air left his lungs like a deflating balloon as he sank to the floor. Burning hot tears flowed out of his eyes like lava, and sobs and cries forced their way out of his mouth, his body being racked and rattled with the heaves of the heavy expulsions from his lungs. The boy hugged his knees to his chest in the corner of the bathroom floor and cried for the rest of the shift, Miriam standing outside of the door, listening with tears in her own eyes, powerless to do anything to help the poor boy.

Friday morning was a horrible return to the ways that things used to be, with Jake being woken up by the haunting sound of his alarm clock beeping like a roll call to hell. He just wanted to stay there in the safety and warmth of his bed and shut out the rest of the world. He had barely had a wink of sleep after walking home from the bakery; he couldn’t bring himself to tell Miriam any of what happened, and he felt awful seeing the woman’s distraught face as he walked away from the bakery back home last night. The whole day was going to be akin to torture for Jake. Tom had arrived not long after him, and they both made their way to the isolation room together; thankfully he was looking and feeling much more chipper than he had the previous day. The poor, taller teen was also somewhat embarrassed about what had happened the previous day. Jake couldn’t help himself; he felt the need to give the taller teen a tight hug and loving, asking him what on earth he had to be embarrassed about. Tom had done nothing wrong. Jake went out of his way to reassure Tom that he wanted to be there for him regardless of how he felt. That small moment was blissful, but then the reality of everything came crashing back down for Jake as he remembered that Tom could never love him, that he was just looking after him for Connor, and that Jake was nothing in comparison to Tom. The two boys spent the whole day trying to get some work done and listening to music, then just talking about music for all of the rest of the day. Tom also mentioned he wouldn’t be able to visit Jake at the bakery on Saturday and Sunday because he and his mother were out of town for the weekend. They were completely on their own in that room for hours on end, and Jake couldn’t help but notice how physically affectionate Tom was being, more than usual; pulling him for hugs over and over again and patting and stroking his back almost constantly, running his fingers through his hair too. Jake loved Tom's touch; he craved it. He didn’t want to give in to it, but he yearned for it so badly. Even though Jake tried to hide it all day, Tom could clearly tell something was amiss and bothering the smaller boy, although he wasn't quite sure how to bring it up. Tom decided that Jake would tell him if he wanted to when he was ready.

The final bell of the day rang once again; the weekend was officially here. Both Jake and Tom walked side by side to the school's entrance, Jake shivering slightly when he spotted where Riya had confronted him yesterday. Tom was very aware whenever Jake’s demeanour changed; he could spot it from a mile away, it seemed. Putting an arm around Jake’s shoulders and pulling him close, Tom leaned close to his ear and gently asked, “You cold? Let me warm you up a bit; you can have my jacket if you-” Jake snapped around suddenly and looked Tom dead in the eye; Tom could see there were hot tears in Jake’s eyes as he looked at him. “Tom… Be honest, are you just looking out for me as a favour to Connor?” Tom’s eyes went wide, and his left eyebrow raised up high as he looked at the other boy with shock and confusion. “What? Where did you get that idea? I really care about you, Jake.” Tom’s large hand came to grip Jake’s smaller one as he spoke, letting Jake know that he meant what he said sincerely. “Is this what’s been bothering you today?” Jake rubbed away the tears from his eyes and looked away from Tom, unable to form any words. “Jake, listen to me. I care about you so much. At first, it was because when I saw you suffering so much, I saw myself in you, my younger self. I wanted to help you in any way I could, so you didn’t have to suffer like I had. However, as these past weeks have gone on, I’ve realised… I care about you so much; I care about you… more than a friend. I – I like you, Jake! I really do – hell, no, I love you!”

Jake's eyes blew wide, pupils shrinking to resemble tiny black beads; he couldn’t comprehend what he was hearing. Tom wanted Jake to respond, to say anything, but Jake didn’t; he couldn't. Tom brought it upon himself to break the silence, reaching towards Jake’s chest with his left hand, gripping the boy’s jacket and pulling him closer; Tom’s right hand went to softly grip underneath Jake’s chin and tilted his face up to look at him. There was a single moment's pause, a single beat, as Tom closed the gap between them and brought his lips to Jake’s. the taller boy’s eyes fluttering shut as he did so and softly expressed everything he felt for Jake in that one, beautiful action. Jake felt his world stop; time dissolved into nothing. The kiss felt like an eternity, and it was wonderful. Jake realised what was happening and let his eyes flutter shut too, kissing him back lovingly and bringing his arms to wrap around Tom’s muscular back and simply enjoying that amazing moment until they had both pulled away. The realisation of what had just happened hit Jake like a bolt of lightning from the sky. Oh no. What if someone saw? What if someone told his parents? What would they say? Jake’s wide eyes grew terrified as he stumbled backwards from the taller teen; he then turned himself around and sprinted off down the street without uttering a single word to Tom. Jake didn’t even turn around when he heard Tom’s desperate calls of “Jake! Wait!” leave the lips he had just kissed. Tears fell down Jake’s pale cheeks as he ran all the way back home and locked himself in his bedroom for the next two days…

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ble4chmyhandz · 8 days ago

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Tipiskaw International High School Part 9

Beware that this story contains bullying, homophobia, mentions of abusive relationships, transphobia, mental health, heavy subject matter, descriptions of torture and injury. Please take care when reading.

Such A Mess, But I'm Feelin' Alive

Jake arrived at school that warm Wednesday morning with the memories of the previous night still fresh in his mind. Miriam and he had shared a lovely meal, had ice cream and then watched the cheesiest film they could possibly find on Netflix for a laugh. She drove Jake back home, and he snuck inside without having to say a word to his mother or father, an excellent night if there ever was one. As he promised, Tom was waiting at the front steps. The taller boy walked Jake to his locker and then to the isolation room, where he expected to spend the day again. Upon opening the door, they were met by the friendly face of Aiden, who had taken a seat at the front of the room. The three friends sat around and chatted like they had the previous lunchtime until the bell rang, but Tom didn’t leave. “Tom, I know Jake’s told you all about the booze escapades we had yesterday, but you have normal classes to get to; I don’t want you getting in trouble.” Aiden attempted to usher the black-haired boy towards the door, but Tom turned to his bi-colour-haired friend and gave him a teasing smile, letting on that there was something more going on than what met the eye.

Just at the right moment, Connor emerged through the door with a satisfied grin on his face. Although he managed to mask it, Aiden felt his stomach churn at the idea that his principal might have caught onto the fact that sweet little innocent, well-behaved Aiden might have gotten tipsy on school property the previous day. “Don’t worry, boys; no one is in trouble. Take a seat and listen up; I’ve made some class arrangements for you all.” Connor held up two sheets of paper, class schedules, one clearly marked ‘Aiden’ and the other one ‘Jake’. Doing as told, each boy sat and listened with interest at what Connor had planned. “I’m introducing a ‘buddy’ system.” The principal started with a self-satisfied smile. “Aiden and Jake, I’m going to assign you both a friend to go to and from the majority of lessons with you. In order to make this work, I’ve changed your schedules a bit and spoken to all of the relevant teachers to ensure that you’re seated next to your buddy. Aiden looked very pleased with what Connor was suggesting when Jake turned his head towards him, then Jake looked the other way at Tom, who looked back at Jake with his usual beaming smile. “Connor? Quick question; I don’t mean to be rude, but what does it have to do with Tom?” Both the scar-faced young man and the principal chuckled at the blue-haired teen’s comment. “Gosh, Jake, haven’t you caught on yet? Tom’s going to be the one keeping an eye on you. He’s the one who gave me this idea after all.” Jake blushed a bit in embarrassment for being so dense, the new information making everything make a lot more sense. Jake decided then it would be best if he just listened to the principal and refrained from commenting from this point forward.

Aiden then took the moment’s silence to give himself the opportunity to speak, raising his hand politely, Connor then nodding at him to ask his question. “Who’s my buddy going to be?” The older man came, briefly glanced outside the door with a smile, confusing Aiden, then looked back towards the e-boy and started to answer his question. “Well, son. I’m really sorry, but I’m afraid I couldn’t get Rosa María or Lake for the job; their classes are just too different from yours.” Aiden didn’t mean to, but his face formed a slightly disappointed frown, Jake then placing a hand on the shorter boy’s shoulder to comfort him. Aiden hadn’t expected to be paired with either girl, but he still had felt a bit hopeful about the prospect of one of the girls spending her time with him when Connor mentioned the buddy programme. “I was a little bit stuck on who to choose for you, but Tom gave me some ideas, and I had a think… Then I discussed the topic with the special someone that we felt could be well suited for you. Your new ‘buddy’ agreed, and they're going to keep an eye on you in lessons from now on.” Aiden’s face filled with optimism again as his hopeful eyes looked towards the door as Connor opened it for the mystery person who had been assigned to look after Aiden. It was going to Gabby or Ellie, wasn’t it? Maybe Tristan or Benji? Aiden had got along well with them too recently.

The door swung open, and the bright colour of a familiar yellow t-shirt met Aiden’s eyes as all of his hopefulness fell into utter shock and disbelief. “No… way…” The person that Tom and Connor had felt was best suited for the e-boy was none other than James motherfucking Costa, the very person that Aiden had constantly spoken about teasing him. God, Aiden had even despised him two days prior because he thought that James had been involved in Yul and Riya’s targeting of Aiden online. Even Jake was slightly shocked, leaning over to Tom to quickly whisper. “Are you sure this is a good idea?” The taller boy winked at him reassuringly. “Of course, James really cares about Aiden. He wore to take good care of him. Jake, if there’s anyone I trust to look after Aiden, then it’s the guy who looked after me at my lowest. James’s smug smile beamed into the eyes of every man in the room; he held his arms politely behind his back as he waited for the principal to continue. However, before Connor could say anything more, Aiden’s voice broke through the silence again. “Are you freaking kidding me? We’ve only just become friends!” The grey-haired man looked more than surprised upon hearing Aiden’s little outburst. “Is there a problem, Aiden?” Connor asked with a slight tilt of his head and a genuinely concerned look on his face. Aiden paused for a moment, just realising what he had said in front of everyone. He didn’t want to come across as ungrateful to the principal, especially since Conner had worked so hard in putting things together to help him, not just now but many times before. Connor always enthusiastically replied to his mother’s emails if she ever reported any transphobic mistreatment that had been directed towards Aiden and went above and beyond, doing whatever he could do to try and help.

“N-no, sir! Not at all… H-hi, uh, James.” James’s pearly whites peeked out from behind his lips as he flashed a satisfied smile right towards Aiden, then moved to stand next to where the e-boy was sitting. “Don’t worry, Mister Blake; he knows I’m going to take very good care of him…” Connor decided not to delve further into the Brazilian teen’s last comment, then turning to address all of the boys once more. “James and Tom are going to be in charge of being with you in places with lots of people, going between lessons, things like that. If anyone hears any nasty comments or sees anything malicious about someone online, then they are to come to me immediately to report it so it can be dealt with. Does that sound good to everyone?” Each boy nodded in unison; Jake and Tom looked at each other with playful grins while James wrapped an arm around Aiden while the smaller boy sighed and rolled his eyes into the back of his head, then whispered under his breath. “I’m going to need a lobotomy after this…”

For the rest of the week, Jake spent almost every moment by Tom’s side; the two boys were inseparable, whether it was in class, at lunch, before school, or after school. Jake and Tom weren't even apart at Jake’s after-school job because Tom would follow him to the bakery and hang around, not that Miriam minded, of course, and Jake took it upon himself to ask Miriam for the afternoon off to go to Tom’s second after-school soccer practice on the Thursday night that week. She had happily agreed, thankfully. Jake really enjoyed watching all of the young men from the stand and cheering on the black-haired man who kept forgetting to focus on training by waving at Jake. The two young men simply loved each other's company and thrived with it too. While before, the two lads only ever saw each other in P.E., now there wasn’t somewhere one didn’t go without the other. Jake also made sure to frequently see Aiden too, both he and Tom sitting near Aiden and James if they could during lessons and lunch. The four of them had become a little gang, a group of best friends who had all found each other just when they needed to. Getting closer with Aiden had also meant getting closer with Ellie and Gabby too, forming a nice little friendship with the two girls. Jake thought he would never see the day when Ellie Parker not only didn’t despise him but even considered him a friend!

The boost of having Tom by his side had made Jake's mood and temperament improve expeditiously, not to mention his concentration in class. Now that the blue-haired boy knew that he had someone who cared for him by his side, he felt so much less self-conscious about the possibility of dirty stares or jeers from the people around him. Jake’s test scores just seemed to naturally go up with Tom there lending a helping hand in solving questions or studying whenever he needed it. The teachers were impressed with Jake’s newfound dedication to his work and positive attitude, and the previously miserable and hopeless young man who had started to give up on everyone and everything was finally starting to understand what happiness felt like. Those simple days were bliss, and Jake had never adored Tom so much more and more as the days continued on. After school and work were over, Jake got to experience the fun of texting his new friends in group chats and individually, mainly just Aiden and Tom. The two boys were great to speak to when Jake felt so isolated while avoiding his parents at home. While Jake was coming to realise how much he loved Tom, Aiden was like a cheeky little brother and best friend rolled into one. Them both being sent to the isolation room that day must have been fate, he thought. Aiden had even gone out of his way to set up a Discord server just for him, James, Tom, Jake, Ellie and Gabby so they could all spam each other with memes and laugh with each other until the early hours of the morning. One of the best things they had ever discussed was after James had found out that Riya had been given a week's worth of detentions for her little stunt that had targeted Aiden’s identity. Each of the six friends celebrated by chatting together for hours after hearing the great news.

Tom and Jake didn’t stop seeing each other when the weekend rolled around either; Tom spent practically the whole day with Jake while the blue-haired boy tried to work his all-day shift, although it wasn’t ideal. Miriam couldn’t find it in herself to be mad at Tom, especially when his presence made Jake so happy. God knows that lad had suffered so much; he deserved a bit of that simple joy of young love. It was no different on Sunday either; Tom and Jake had stayed together for the whole day yet again. That Sunday evening, Miriam had invited Tom and Jake to hers for an evening meal, which they both graciously accepted; all three of them benefitted from the company and relationships formed with each other. Jake could forget about his horrible home life for a few hours and spend some time with two of the people he loved the most.

Meanwhile, Aiden’s patience with James was starting to wear thin… until it wasn’t anymore. Being forced together with the curly-haired man had made Aiden realise just how funny James could be. In the beginning, people had made comments about Aiden being James’s boyfriend, especially after James had dedicated his winning goal to Aiden, which the bi-colour-haired boy denied strongly. James would simply shrug and reply, ‘Not yet,’ with a teasing smirk. The dark-skinned young man still had his teasing comments, but Aiden had found the confidence to throw his own right back at James, amusing the Brazilian to no end. If anything, the banter they had together just made them grow…closer. While they were studying in class, the e-boy would always notice James looking over his shoulder. At first he thought James was trying to copy his work, but after a while he realised it was just because James was making sure… that Aiden was okay. James scanned his eyes around like a hawk, keeping an eye out for anyone that dared to look at Aiden in an unpleasant way and listening out for nasty comments or mocking laughter. Once that cocky and sassy mask slipped, underneath was a genuinely kind and caring young man. It was easy to see why he was so well liked by those who had gotten to know him. The Brazilian had a charm that you couldn’t resist after a while. Aiden had really started to enjoy and even adore his company, which James reciprocated. The two then actively started to seek each other's company when they weren’t forced together, hanging out in the park after school on a few occasions.

One day while walking between classes, a boy had shouted a comment about Aiden down the hall; something about him being a ‘freak’ and that he ‘better know to use the right locker room’ the next time they had P.E.’ Aiden tried to ignore him, but James, on the other hand, wasn’t having any of it. The muscular Brazilian had walked over to the boy who had made the comment in the middle of the hall, in front of many spectators, and, as bold as brass, placed a hand against the wall where he was leaning and shoved a finger in his face; the Brazilian’s eyes had filled with fire. James had spoken in a low tone, stern, commanding, and threatening – a warning. Aiden could only just make out James saying. “Say anything like that to my friend again, and no one will know who or what the hell you’re supposed to be...” Aiden was amazed at how far James was willing to put his neck out for him; he truly did care about him. Aiden decided to show his appreciation for James’s selfless action by offering him a hand massage for the still tender fist he had been told had gotten on the wrong side of a metal filing cabinet during the break at Monday night’s game. Whenever Aiden spoke to Jake, both boys agreed that their lives had improved very much since their ‘buddies’ had come into their lives.

When the next Monday rolled around, it was the new normal routine again: meet each other at the school gates and go to their lockers together, make their way to class together, attend lessons, eat lunch together and then go and visit Aiden, James, Gabby and Ellie for the rest of lunchtime, attend more lessons and then at the end of the day, both walk to the soccer field together, where they then would finally separate and Jake would go to sit with Aiden, Gabby and Ellie in the east stand while Tom met with James and the rest of his teammates to play against whatever school had come to challenge them that week. For both men, it was a heavenly routine to have, and it would all start again happily the next day. Jake wasn’t the only one getting a boost from the whole ‘buddy’ arrangement; Richard had mentioned to Tom that his playing had improved (when he wasn’t staring at Jake), especially when Tom scored the winning goal at that Monday night’s soccer game. As Jake watched the taller boy run up to him and pull him in for a hug after scoring, Jake knew he couldn’t deny it any longer. He was well and truly in love with Tom, completely enamoured; he wanted nothing more than to be with him 24/7, and that scared the ever-loving shit out of Jake. The last time he had loved someone, it had ended in disaster; could he really risk that again? With Tom? Jake couldn’t decide what he wanted, one side of his mind screaming yes and the other side screaming no.

Another week had passed; each day was so much less boring of a day compared to what it used to be for both Jake and Tom. Watching Monty Python films in history class was so much more fun when you had a friend to laugh alongside you, and Jake was just grateful he no longer had to deal with Lynda Anderson and her bullshit in English class. The day wore on to lunchtime when Jake and Tom were lying together on a grassy embankment, below an old, tall, mighty oak tree, not too far from the soccer field. The two boys’ bodies were side by side as they watched the rolling clouds in the blue sky, letting their stomachs digest the double meal that Miriam had made for the both of them to enjoy together. Suddenly Tom sat up and looked at Jake, saying nothing, deep in thought. Jake didn’t notice at first, as he had closed his eyes, almost being lulled to sleep by the gentle embrace of the sun’s soothing rays. When Jake blinked his eyes open, he could see something was clearly troubling Tom. Jake sat up high and scooted a bit closer to the larger boy. “Everything okay?” Tom said nothing again and looked down, avoiding Jake’s dark eyes. Jake had really come to appreciate everything about Tom: his honesty, his kindness, and his ability to care for those who were struggling. Feeling rather brave, Jake reached his hand out to grasp Tom’s like Tom had done to him many times over the past week. “You can tell me anything, if you want to. I’ll listen…” Tom smiled upon hearing his own words echoed back to him through Jake. The scar-faced man looked up at the sky once more as he finally started to speak, still avoiding Jake’s eyes.

“Okay, I’ve wanted to talk to you about something, but I just wasn’t sure how to bring it up or how to say it, so… Here it goes…” Jake braced himself; just what could Tom possibly say? He wasn’t going to tell him he… “When you accidentally walked in on me when I was in the changing rooms, you would’ve seen my scars… the ones I don’t usually show people. The ones on my shoulder and upper arms… I don’t even show the guys in my team those marks if I can help it, not even James. That’s why I was in the shower after everyone else had gone. I wait for them all to leave before I wash after a game.” Oh, it was a confession, of sorts. Not the one Jake had been anticipating, however. Jake’s heart filled with sorrow for the other boy who had done so much to put him at ease over the last week, unintentionally squeezing Tom’s scarred hand tighter to encourage him to continue. “I dunno what I’ve been thinking, Jake; I’m still so insecure about them sometimes. I got worried that I might… scare you off… they aren’t that nice to look at.” Jake couldn’t hold his tongue anymore and grabbed Tom to pull him in for a crushing hug. Tom then wrapped his arms back around Jake once he realised what the smaller boy was doing. “You could never scare me away, Tom! You’ve been so kind to me; I don’t care what you look like… I care about who you are… I’ve never trusted a person the way I trust you.” Jake looked deep into Tom’s eyes yet again to see him welling up with gratitude, the larger young man willing himself not to cry at Jake’s words.

“Oh, Jake… I-I…” Jake's breath was caught in his throat at the suspense. “I really trust you too.” Godamnit, if only a word beginning with l had replaced trust, Jake did feel slightly selfish for thinking that after Tom had poured his heart out. “I want to be completely honest with you… I want to tell you what happened to me…” Jake couldn’t help the little gasp that escaped his lungs; regardless, he grasped both of Tom’s hands and looked him dead in the eye. “Only if you feel ready; don’t push yourself. I’m listening…” Tom took another deep breath and squeezed his eyes shut as he retold the horrible tale. “My dad… wasn’t present much when I was a kid, when he was… My mom had no idea what he was up to, and if she ever tried to find out, she would be at the receiving end of his wrath because she wouldn’t let him get to me… I think that shaped how I saw the world, how I saw those who are downtrodden by others. Years went by, and James arrived from Curitiba when I was in middle school. Our teacher told us some Portuguese words because his English wasn’t that great, to make him feel included. So many kids in our class really resented him for that; it’s kind of amazing just how horribly racist middle schoolers can be… They would rather shout the most awful things at James than bother to say the word ‘sim’ for yes or ‘obrigado’ for thank you. I could see he was suffering, not unlike how my mother had. That’s why I stuck by him and why we became friends. Why we’re still friends today… James was a big help in getting through… what happened next….”

Tom took a deep breath and a brief sip of the water that had been lying next to him in his bottle on the grass. The scar-faced boy’s eyes squeezed shut once again as he continued. “I was fifteen… I hadn’t been here for long, and my dad came back into my life, well… kind of… He came back into town, but he never visited. I hadn’t seen him since I was eight, and I haven’t seen him since. One night I was just in bed, dead asleep, and I heard these noises. I thought it was my mom; maybe she couldn't sleep or something. She suffered from insomnia a lot back then. Then there was this… hand; it grabbed me; it dragged me from my bed. Before I knew it, I was having my wrists zip-tied together, and I was thrown into the trunk of a car. Before they closed the trunk, all I remember is looking up and seeing the moon and… and… the feeling of a syringe injecting something into the crook of my arm. My mom hadn’t heard a thing because of the strong sleeping meds she had been prescribed for her insomnia. When I woke up… I couldn’t tell if it was day or night. The room was just so dark… I had all my limbs tied down to this wooden armchair, just cable ties all over my arms and legs, and they… had a knife… I don’t remember that much after that point. Not exactly what they did or how, but I remember the cuts and scrapes of the cold metal against my skin and that… pain… I’ve never known agony like it… The only reason they stopped when they did is because they found my dad… and killed him, shooting him right in the forehead. Turns out the guys who took me were old gangster friends of his; he owed them money, and they thought that the best way to make him pay up was to torture the son he hadn’t seen for seven years… But he didn’t; he didn’t give a shit about me or my mom. He was a selfish coward who died like a dog; he put me and my mother in danger and didn’t give a single fuck. Once they knew my dad was dead, they drugged me again, patched me up a little bit and dumped me on the front doorstep of my mom’s house for her to find in the morning. I had only been gone for three hours. My mom didn’t forgive herself for what happened for a long time; she still hasn’t fully forgiven herself, even now…” At that moment, Tom started to weep, uncontrollably and endlessly; Jake could do nothing but hold him close as Tom clung to him and cried into his chest.

Jake shushed Tom in an attempt to soothe him and rubbed his back, but Tom still had more to tell; his eyes welling up didn’t stop him as he pushed on through the tears, gripping Jake's hand in a vice grip and occasionally choking on his words as he spoke. “I didn’t come back to school for three months. I didn’t leave the house at all for two of them; hell, for just under a year, the only places I would go to were here, home and our local grocery store, if I was having a good day mentally, that is. James rang and texted me every day; he would tell me how much he missed me, and he would go through school work with me over call. Connor got in touch with my mother, and he did everything in his power to make sure I would feel safe when I came back to school, but when I did come back, all anyone saw was the marks on my skin… Only James didn’t; he just saw his friend. He never left me despite what everyone said about me back then. I would run out of lessons all the time. Whenever I had flashbacks because blood was mentioned in science class, or whenever a teacher shouted, I would get so scared I would just run away. Connor was my rock; I always went to his office, and he would calm me down. We would have daily sessions where we would just talk; I preferred speaking to him over any of the other counsellors. Then one day James said he was going to try out for the soccer team. We both really loved playing; because I struggled to leave the house, he would just come over to mine, and we’d play soccer all afternoon in the yard. He convinced me to try out, so we would attend all of the training sessions together, and eventually we both got in; it did wonders for my confidence, and after a while I just focused on the sport; it took me away from everything else. I didn’t realise how much better I was until Connor brought up the fact that I no longer went to see him every day. I’m still so grateful to Connor and to James; I think I would do anything for those guys…”

Tom was still upset but much more put together than he had been before. As soon as Tom felt more in control of his emotions, he looked back up at Jake and thanked him. Jake thanked Tom for trusting him with such sad memories. At that moment Jake felt closer to Tom than he ever had before; their faces were so close together again, just like when Tom had fallen into him in the changing room last week. Jake could feel Tom’s breath hitting gently against his face. God, he wanted to kiss those perfect lips. Jake had imagined it so many times when he was alone in bed – but… no, he couldn’t. What happened to you the last time you let this happen, you idiot? Jake recalled the venom and fire his parents spat at him when it all came out that he liked men. For his own sake, while he was in that household, he couldn’t let his emotions get the better of him. He had to carry on with Tom, just as friends. Whatever Jake did, he couldn’t let his parents know anything about Tom, especially not how much Jake knew that he loved him…

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