bigpantsnobones

[bigpantsnobones]

"my pokedex is getting fat and sexy" -said because she was filling up her pokedex

[bigpantsnobones]

-doing crafts on the porch at night with fiance-

-clinks in distance-

"ahh nows the perfect time to be smithing metal dont you think?"

(i died laughing its almost pitch black)

[bigpantsnobones]

When im lucid waking up and reply to a text

[bigpantsnobones]

I am stuck in the bathroom. Im not supposed to be gone more than 10 minutes but,...its stuck. The shit is stuck and wont come out but im too far gone to give up and try again later...

[bigpantsnobones]

Why they put the foreskin on the fruit Roll-Up like that what if I just want to bite into it?

[bigpantsnobones]

Me on vacation at a cool restaurant

"yes instead of coleslaw, can i get all fries?"

*little time later*

*plate FULL (F.U.L.L) of spanish rice placed in front of me*

*mouth agape*

[bigpantsnobones]

"if you mix yaoi..and yuri..

And made fucked up sex between a male and female what would that be?"

"..."

"serious question"

"thats just straight sex david"

*cowers*

"whats that???"

[bigpantsnobones]

Yall ready for the shrimp special?

[bigpantsnobones]

*Talking about something with my brother, my other brother chimes in after finishing his chores*

Okay david, lean over..

I need a reward...

[bigpantsnobones]

-Walks into establishment-

"Can i have the password to your printer please?"

[bigpantsnobones]

*farts at table while we are eating*

Ivy: Put that in the bank-

Rotfl

[bigpantsnobones]

° Barack Obama

°Bonlock Blogromla

°Bohawk Nomama

°Blockglock Choblama

°Obank Bonaba

°Tralk Bohama

°Oback Broklama

°Boback Dogracha

°Bobclock Oblockoba

[bigpantsnobones]

*jumpscare*

[bigpantsnobones]

ZING *my fiance's voice says every time anything happens*

[bigpantsnobones]

"Lalalla bcauzz i luv. Urr faceeee,, xoxoxioxo nuewww purspectiivvcc"

My girl in the bathroom rn

[bigpantsnobones]

Believe it or not I was funny once

[bigpantsnobones]

My girl in the exact moment my ass is out in the open @ivydubbbbz