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when you were little you played with mom’s emails

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i was born from a lab experiment in which researchers worked to synthesize a person who “deserved it” (paper fails to clarify what was meant by this)

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CHECKMARK: just got my grandma to moan and groan and complain about men and what they are like

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i asked her if she’s met a lot men like that and she said oh well she’s met plenty

CHECKMARK: just got my grandma to moan and groan and complain about men and what they are like

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CHECKMARK: just got my grandma to moan and groan and complain about men and what they are like

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reblog this and tag with a food you no longer have access to (closed restaurant, state you moved away from, ex’s mom’s cooking, etc) that will haunt you until your dying day, mine are the spicy chicken sandwich on the employee menu at the fine dining restaurant I was a prep cook at, and the onion bagel from the kosher place down the street from my house when I lived in the city

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Biggest red flag in a man is when he says his favorite food is steak. First of all it should be cock but even then can you not say something more nuanced you blubbering ape. Not even cheesecake or something. I’d even take a subway sandwich because it means you have some sort of desire to change the world around you

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Please Lord take all of TommyInnit's pain and give it to mrbeast

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nevermind about that girlfriend part

i don’t like the fact that tommyinnit is wearing cooler jeans than me

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i’m going to kill myself and im not even kidding this time

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i’m going to kill myself and im not even kidding this time

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ME

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ME

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i don’t like the fact that tommyinnit is wearing cooler jeans than me

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i don’t like the fact that he has a girlfriend either. or that lesbians seem to like him better than me 

i don’t like the fact that tommyinnit is wearing cooler jeans than me

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i don’t like the fact that tommyinnit is wearing cooler jeans than me