20 | Male | Gay | Australian | Loves Cute things .... Tick!
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
Photo
485K notes
·
View notes
Photo
165K notes
·
View notes
Text
Unicorns
Today was my first D&D session as a DM, and to commemorate the occasion I convinced friends who have never played a tabletop RPG before to hop in and make characters. There were a lot of highlights, but the MVP of this session was our Half-Orc Fighter, Chadwick.
Now Chadwick’s background is that of a disgraced model. He’s a surprisingly gorgeous half-orc man who achieved lower level fame and riches in a lavish city. However, in a street-racing chariot incident, he crashed into the menagerie and killed the last known unicorn. Since that scandal, he is unwelcome in his home city and thus is on a quest to prove the unicorn species still survives, and recover his reputation.
At the tavern the party met at, he was following a lead on a man named Walsh who sells unicorn horns.
Chadwick: Are those the unicorn horns? Me: Make a perception check. (He rolls low) They look like unicorn horns to you. Chadwick: How much money do I have? Me: 25 gold. Chadwick: I turn to him and ask to have one. Me as Walsh: I wouldn’t be in business if I just handed this shit out for pennies! It’s 300 gold or scram, son. Chadwick: I pick him up and slam his face into the table. Me: Fucking hell, alright, roll to attack. (He rolls high, deals 5 damage) You bash Walsh’s head down onto the table and one of his teeth is knocked right out. Chadwick: I tell Walsh to give me a unicorn horn. Me: He’s groaning and trying to staunch the blood coming out of his mouth. “God damn it! Fine if you want one take one. They’re not even real ya bastard. My cousin up the Sword Coast hunts narwhals, alright?” Chadwick: I take a narwhal horn. Also, his tooth. Me: His what? Chadwick: The tooth I knocked out. I take it off the table, put it in my pocket, and wink. Then I walk away. Me: ….Walsh is now reevaluating his line of work.
Chadwick later killed a snake with the narwhal horn, and started making a habit out of collecting trophies from bodies. His inventory currently contains Walsh’s tooth, 4 snake fangs, centipede mandibles, and the trachea of a green hag.
He ripped out the trachea with his teeth.
1K notes
·
View notes
Text
A group of rough looking boys walked past me today and all I heard of their conversation was “he’s got that anxiety disorder bro so I went with him so he’d be more comfortable” and it made me realise the world isn’t all that bad
1M notes
·
View notes
Text
yes.
if u don’t kiss ur cat on their tiny soft little forehead wtf are u even doing
426K notes
·
View notes
Photo
161K notes
·
View notes
Photo
15K notes
·
View notes
Video
Me and Bae.
tumblr
when you tryna chill but your siblings love annoyin you
823K notes
·
View notes
Photo
A cute comic drawn to the lyrics of Owl City’s new Christmas song, ‘Humbug’! I highly recommend playing the song and reading along~ :)
I honestly could not pick one lyric, I love the whole song! I haven’t done some Owl City fanart for a while so this massive comic might make up for my absence…? :P
MERRY CHRISTMAS! ^_^
-Love from tessmontyart (previously rockcandypassion ;) )
textures and brushes used: [x] [x] [x] [x] [x] [x] [x]
555 notes
·
View notes
Note
do y'all have a fighter tag?
We do! It’s “fighters don’t just hit stuff”.
497 notes
·
View notes
Photo
140K notes
·
View notes