bartycrouchjrismyboyfriend

[bartycrouchjrismyboyfriend]

[bartycrouchjrismyboyfriend]

nothing quite like getting home to my wife and kids (my bed and pillows)

[bartycrouchjrismyboyfriend]

Pandora hanging out with the Slytherin Skittles:

[bartycrouchjrismyboyfriend]

james/sirius/remus minific | 1,032 words | for @ecstarry

It’s dark, and the common room is fogged up with smoke. Sirius is vaguely aware of Remus’ warmth against him, thrumming and constant. They’ve half-fallen onto the couch, with Sirius perched on Remus’ strong legs. Remus’ arms are spread wide, leaving his chest open for Sirius to fall into whenever Sirius wants. They’re both drunk, and still riding the high of having kissed for the first time two weeks ago. Sirius wants to be with Remus all the time, always touching him, always ready to kiss or hug or let himself get fucked into the mattress— whatever Remus wants.

Remus sits up a little, pressing his front into Sirius’ back and slinking an arm about his waist. The other hand comes up to brush a hair from the nape of Sirius’ neck. Remus presses a warm kiss to the space it leaves. “How’re you feeling?”

Sirius giggles, because he’s happy, and also because he’s a bit drunk. “Good,” he hums, drawing out the vowel. Remus responds with a kiss to his jaw. The common room has emptied out after the party, leaving mostly the smokers and too-drunk couples who haven’t gotten around the staircase slides yet. Regardless, nobody’s eyes are on them, and so Sirius turns his head and kisses Remus fully, feeling the arm around his waist tighten.

“Well, now you’re just mocking me.”

The cushion they’re sitting on shifts as someone drops onto it. Sirius pulls back too quickly, still not used to this whole public affection thing. It’s useless— it’s only James, with his head hanging off the back of the couch.

“Strikeout tonight?” Sirius asks, glancing back around the room. There must be someone James had been focusing his affections on tonight, but the room is almost empty now— meaning he was unsuccessful.

“Completely,” James groans, picking his head up, “and now I’ll have to sleep knowing you two gits are getting it on right next to me.”

Sirius feels Remus’ sharp inhale in his chest. “Sorry, mate.”

“Nah,” James waves a hand, then pats his leg. Sirius, getting the message, adjusts so he’s sitting sideways, his back against the arm of the couch and his legs tossed in James’ lap. Immediately, James starts toying with the hem of Sirius’ pants. “It’s alright. I just need to break this dry spell, and it doesn’t help that you two are now doing it all the time. Really left me in the lurch here, Pads.”

Sirius grimaces. “Well, I—”

“It’s probably amazing,” James continues. He moves his hand to inch underneath Sirius’ pant leg, spreading his palm out just above his ankle. He’s in his own little world, now, oblivious to Sirius’ attempted answer. “I mean, you’re both fit, and I know for a fact Moony’s an amazing kisser—”

Remus breaks James out of his reverie with a laugh. “I forgot about that, honestly.”

Sirius sits up, looking between them. “When did that happen?”

James’ cheeks go bright red, but Remus only smirks. It isn’t too far out of the question— Sirius has definitely kissed Peter in a round of truth or dare before, and he and Remus only got together because of a potentially rigged game of spin the bottle. Still, the concept of James and Remus kissing sends an odd shiver down Sirius’ spine. 

“Fifth year, remember?” Remus says, reaching out to run a finger along the side of Sirius’ scalp, then down his neck. “The party after the Quidditch final...”

The memory comes perfectly to his mind: Remus with a hand on James’ jaw, planting a too-long kiss on his lips. Sirius couldn’t sleep that night, tossing and turning about whether or not Remus really liked boys, because boys who didn’t like boys didn’t kiss like that. In the end, he’d jerked off about it, then finally fallen asleep.

Still, he pouts. “Well, you don’t know if I’m a good kisser, Prongs.”

James’ eyes light up. “You’re right, Pads, I don’t.”

Something has become distinctly tense between them, like a balloon filling with air, and Sirius decides to poke his finger into the rubber. “Maybe I’m shit at it.”

The hand on his calf inches up, then tightens. James presses back. “Maybe you are.”

Sirius risks a glance at Remus. He’s dropped his head onto the back of the couch, and his bottom lip is caught tight between his teeth. When he registers Sirius’ gaze, he glances at James, then shrugs.

Sirius pokes harder. “Only one way to find out.”

James leans a bit forward. Sirius does the same. They both keep going, inching closer and closer, pressing harder and harder, until Sirius can feel James’ breath hot on his lips. Briefly, the sober part of his brain starts to register exactly what he’s doing: perched in Remus’ lap, about to kiss his best friend. Before he can have time to regret it, Remus’ hand lands on the back of his neck and pushes them together.

It’s warm. James’ lips taste like beer mixed with a bit of sweat, and Sirius chases the flavor, letting his hands come to James’ shoulders. He pulls, as if James could get any closer, then lets his lips part. James’ tongue pushes into his mouth, and Sirius can’t help the little noise that comes out of his mouth.

As soon as he makes a sound, there’s a hand knotting in the hair at the base of his neck, pulling him back. Remus’ lips replace James’, twice as intense, and when he comes up for air, James dives back in. It goes on and on like that, Remus and James taking turns licking into his mouth, until he can’t tell whose lips are on his and whose spit is all over his mouth. He only regains the power to stop himself once he feels Remus poking him in the hip.

“Moony,” he says, gasping. “I think we should continue this upstairs.”

Remus half-pushes him out of his lap, not at all trying to hide the apparent tent in his pants when he stands. James remains deflated on the couch, his spread legs failing to hide his similar problem. Sirius waits a moment, then offers his hand. “Coming, Prongs?”

“Fuck, I hope so.”

[bartycrouchjrismyboyfriend]

reblog this for good luck

[bartycrouchjrismyboyfriend]

someone write this i beg

James Potter as an underwear model and Regulus Black as his photographer

Give regulus a chance to let him stare avidly

Regulus ‘can I take a close up please’ Black

James ‘do you want me to just take them off for you it might be easier’ Potter

am I right or am I right folks

[bartycrouchjrismyboyfriend]

swimming and swimming and swimming.

endless routes-

leading me back to the same thought.

my mind is endless.

good thoughts, good memories.

bad thoughts, bad memories.

i swim and swim around my blackhole.

the blackhole that is my mind.

no matter how full it is,

theres nothing to find.

i feel like a paper boat sailing

endless routes-

leading me back to the same waves.

rocks under the salt water hit my feet,

bringing me back to reality.

i daydream in my own mind

i don’t know how.

searching for something to find.

steering my fantasy wheel.

in my fantasy mind. searching.

endless routes-

leading me back to same she-shells to relive picking them up.

they’re all in my mind

which is so full and full.

yet not a single thing to find.

you know those beautiful mermaid statues you see?

i aspire to be one.

so elegant and effortless.

one the front of pirate ships.

being the first thing lighthouses see when ships come into view.

portrayed so perfect.

or to be as perfect as stars.

everybody’s seen them.

everybody admires and envy’s them.

so peaceful and content.

they don’t have a mind full of crashing waves and violet waters.

if anything, i feel like the rotting rusty rails on the sunken ships.

constantly getting worse and worse by the minute.

the longer it’s left, the more deteriorated it gets.

fish constantly swimming and bothering them.

never getting any peace always being pestered and chewed on.

while the mermaid statues are on a pedestal, left alone.

all the stars watch over.

left alone.

forever.

alone.

[bartycrouchjrismyboyfriend]

the bad touch by bloodhound gang is SO barty coded

[bartycrouchjrismyboyfriend]

getting shot in the head probably feels soooo good for like a second

[bartycrouchjrismyboyfriend]

okay pretty little liars

university au where james hooks up with regulus at a party one night and then goes to his first tutoring session the next day to find that reg is his tutor. pure chaos ensues.

[bartycrouchjrismyboyfriend]

i’ll get over it i just gotta be dramatic first.

[bartycrouchjrismyboyfriend]

i joined the marauders fandom for wolfstar😭now i don’t even know if they’re in my top 3 ships

[bartycrouchjrismyboyfriend]

my teacher used this as an example “say this boy gets two mars bars-“ and went on about whatever he was talking about

i could of broke down in tears

[bartycrouchjrismyboyfriend]

constantly switching between being horny as fuck and not feeling anything at all

[bartycrouchjrismyboyfriend]

“maybe they survived somehow!!😇🤪😼”

-me when a character literally could not be more dead

[bartycrouchjrismyboyfriend]

and then sirius gets dicked down by remus

Remus Lupin doesn’t manspread, he sits with his legs crossed like a good little gay boy. Sirius Black manspreads.

[bartycrouchjrismyboyfriend]

ive been stabbed