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not femme as in “girl” but femme as in the moon, as in the way the wind caresses long grass, as in the sound of intoxicating laughter, as in putting perfume on knowing it’s your lover’s favorite, as in the soft holy curve of your body, as in water flowing, as in a gentle touch on a butch’s chest, as in the sweetness of honey, as in the glow of fireflies, as in the starry sky on a summer night, as in black lace hidden under soft and comfortable clothes, as in creating art and food and beauty, as in venus rising from seafoam, as in the euphoria of dance and of song and of night, as in glittery eyes and willing lips, as in the gentleness of love mixed with the fierceness of protection, as in care, as in pride, & more & more & more &
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[JL Watchtower]
Batman: *alert, expression grave* We have an emergency.
Superman: *springing into action* Let’s go, you can tell me the details on the way –
Batman: It’s me. I’m the emergency.
Superman: *frowning, examining Batman with x-ray vision* No broken bones, no internal bleeding… what’s wrong?
Batman: I think I’m drunk.
Superman:
Superman: You don’t drink.
Batman: I had canned coffee. From the pantry. There’s crateloads of them.
Superman: *remembering Flash’s newest concoction* Oh
Batman: At first I thought I was just being affected by the sugar.
Superman: *remembering Flash mentioning that he had them specially made for his high metabolism* Oh no
Batman: You know I don’t consume much sugar, Clark. I’m not used to it. I thought it was The Sugar Rush™
Superman: How much did you drink?
Batman: I’d already drunk two cans when I read the fine print. I –
Batman: *clutching Superman’s shoulder, carefully enunciating* I imbibed two whole cans, Clark. Of metahuman-grade Irish Coffee.
Superman: *supporting Batman’s free arm, keeping him from acquainting his face with the floor* Oh no
Batman: I feel strange. I made small talk in the cafeteria. I might’ve cracked a joke at some point. I almost told Green Lantern he did a good job on the last mission.
Superman: Wow
Batman: But he didn’t do a good job, Clark.
Superman: *lips pursed, corners twitching* Mhm
Batman: My mental faculties have been compromised. I feel… bubbly.
Superman: *controlling his breathing*
Batman: I cannot be seen bubbly, Clark. I’m Batman.
Superman: *shoulders shaking, eyes glistening*
Batman: You need to get me out of here before I run around the cafeteria complimenting everyone.
Superman: Okay, just – give me a sec –
Superman: *sniffling* I’m memorizing every detail of this conversation so I can replay it forever
+
[Later, at the Batcave]
Superman: *flies in with Batman in a bridal lift*
Batkids: !!!!!!!!!
Nightwing: We received his emergency alert –
Red Hood: What the fuck happened –?
Nightwing: – he wasn’t responding –
Robin: Is Father conscious –?
Red Robin: I’m getting Alfred –
Superman: GUYS, guys, calm down
Superman: *puts Batman down on his feet* B’s just drunk.
Batman: *stands straight, dusts his shoulders, opens his arms*
Batman: Daddy’s home.
Nightwing:
Robin:
Red Robin: Okay, pause everything, I’m getting a camera *runs off*
Red Hood: *unblinking* Is this real
Batman: How are you boys this fine evenin’?
Robin: It’s 4 AM
Nightwing: Why is he speaking with a southern accent?
Superman: He’s been cycling through accents since liftoff. No idea why.
Red Robin: *returning with an 8K camera in hand* BEHOLD, the reclusive Gotham Bat in his natural habitat…
Batman: *staring at the lens, hands lifting his cape open at shoulder-height*
Batman: *fangs bared* I bid you velcome.
Red Hood: *still unblinking, unmoving* This is the best day of my entire life
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Over the next few days you're going to get a rare look into my creative process as I develop a curse. This will be the most severe curse I have ever cast as I work on extinguishing a man who is abusing his wife and three kids. The curse itself is something I will NOT be posting here for safety reasons, because this kind of curse should not be attempted by anyone less experienced.
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An inexpensive offering that feels expensive is Kings Hawaiian Rolls.
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I started veiling part time in the summer of 2018, then full time that winter. Since then I haven't left my home without a veil. This Saturday I went to a concert and decided to wear a wig instead of a scarf.
It couldn't keep up with the headbanging.
I took it off. I went unveiled in public for the first time in four years. It was liberating. It also reinforced my choice to wear a veil.
There have been times when the veil has been annoying. I didn't think it was a good idea to go on a roller coaster because my veil might fly off. I ran late because I had to style my veil. I kept my camera off in Teams because I didn't have a veil on. While wearing the veil is my choice, I took the choice out of it for myself. I turned it into an obligation. I turned it into a chore.
I stopped being intentional about why I veil, and just slapped something over my hair because that's what I do.
Saturday reminded me that I am allowed to not have a veil on sometimes. If it feels right to me, I can take it off. What's the point in wearing one in my best friend's pool, surrounded by a 6 ft privacy fence, with only women around? Why do I have to wear one in my parents' house? Why do I have to wear one at a rock concert when all I want to do is throw my head around and feel my hair slap me in the face? What's the point in wearing one in my hammock, in my own yard, when no one can see me anyway?
The answer: I don't. There is no reason.
I'm rolling myself back. I love veiling. I love why I started veiling. I love the protection of veiling, the way veiling honors my Goddesses, the way I look while veiling, the way I feel while veiling, the expression of modesty in the face of my Gods, the symbolism of being married and a woman.
I'm taking all of that back from myself, for myself.
I am giving myself permission for veiling to be a choice again.
I'm giving myself permission to sometimes not wear a veil, if that feels right to me. I'm giving myself permission to wear a veil that doesn't fully cover my hair (which is how my Goddesses veil anyway) if I want to.
And this feels refreshing to me. I feel more love towards the veil on my head right now than I have in a long time. Veiling is right for me, but only if I'm doing it for the right reasons. Starting today, I'm only veiling for those reasons again.
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Rapid fire shit I wish people had told me about witchcraft:
Every fucking thing is a spell if you put your mind to it
You can and should bless your medications
Pepper is the best for banishing, especially in the form of pepper spray
Don't trust any man who promotes sex magic...with himself
Powerful witches live and die by arch support
Conversely, plantar fasciitis is one hell of a curse and all it takes to cast it is gifting one pair of cute shoes
Sing while you cleanse - it doesn't have to make sense, it doesn't even have to be real words, but the noise helps drive out bad spirits
Fire IS the cleanser but firefighters uncleanse everything so be fucking careful
Early wiccans made up the bullshit of the Law of 3, the Rede, etc, because they were shitty people who were terrified of being rightfully cursed
Never do a knot spell you can't untie
You can untie any knot spell with scissors
Witchcraft isn't an aesthetic; the most powerful witches don't look like witches and the ones who look most like witches rarely know what the fuck they're doing
Never underestimate the power of a grid
Scrapbook paper will take your spell from 0 to 60
Concrete powder in a gas tank is much more effective than sugar in a gas tank
You can practice any religion, or no religion, and be a witch
Turtles are always a good sign
Crows will be your friend for peanuts, but they WILL eat hummingbirds
Witchcraft is science with some flair
Yeah signs from the universe do exist, but most things aren't Signs(tm)
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jason: dames how much to get you to grow a mullet?
damian: firstly, i have no desire for excess funds, and secondly, what is a mullet and how does it grow?
tim: oh my god
dick: please don't do this jay let it stay in the pa-
jason: BOY DO I HAVE SOME PICTURES FOR YOU
*runs towards discowing collection*
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i have been waiting for a "mr hood was my father" joke for so fucking long oh my god 😂😂😂😂
way to reveal ur daddy issues jay djaksndn
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batman enjoyers when writers acknowledge bruce’s biggest weapon is his love for people
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— simple ward/home or room protections
literally just a rock. it can be a protective crystal if you want, but also if you pick up a rock from outside it can be a ward.
black salt (or any salt, if you wish) on windowsills. i also have black salt in jars in the 4 corners of my room.
sticks. dude trees are SO cool and protective, just don’t cut off a branch (unless you’ve been given permission, but i doubt a tree would like one of their limbs being cut off when you can easily find naturally dropped ones on the ground).
sigils! sigils are so versatile, make your own or find some online, draw it on a paper, and put it in your room. i have some thumbtacked to my wall as well as on my altar.
thread or ribbons around doorknobs. tbh, im not sure where this one comes from (maybe witch bells? which are also an idea) but you can tie black (or any color, but black is good for protection) ribbon around your doorknobs as a form of protection.
i’ll probably add a second post if i think of more. hope these can help you come up with your own ideas, too!! happy witching!
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I don’t want it if it isn’t this
Bernard, pitching a theory to Tim and his family: … therefore, since Batman and Bruce Wayne clearly having something going on, Batman has to be Clark Kent, because he and Bruce Wayne are pretty flirty.
Bats: …
Tim, loving to see his boyfriend excited and loving to cause chaos: Okay, fair enough, but where does Superman fall into this?
Bernard, literally vibrating: okay so—
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(in jason's robin years)
jason: *sneaking in through the manor's window*
bruce: *turning in his chair and flicking the light on* you want to tell me where you've been all night?
jason: i was with dick?
dick: *turning in his chair* wanna try again?
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Tim: I worked with the league of assassins and people died because of me
Dick: I was a Talon, remember? I killed people
Cass: I was raised as an assassin
Damian: same with me
Jason: the current crime lord is here. Do y'all remember the bag with heads?
Duke: what the fuck is happening here?
Barbara: Bruce said he will take one kid to the gala tonight. Everyone is trying to convince others that they are a bad choice, because they are dangerous to society and it's better to send another one
Dick: Duke!
Duke: no, no, no, I was a gang member
*a few hours later, at the gala*
Duke: fuck my siblings
Bruce: language
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brothers are always there for you when you need 'em :')
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