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I swing both ways ;)

Violently. With a bat. Come get some motherfuckers.

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Can you reblog this if you’re either a CARTOON roleplayer                or if you are ᴡɪʟʟɪɴɢ to roleplay with one

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The 1st icon in your folder is your muse’s reaction to dying and coming back to life.

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Great job not getting emotionally attached or doing anything stupid.

Obi-Wan to Anakin (via incorrectstarwarsquotes)

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The first step is to eat a healthy breakfast so you can run from the cops.

Han Solo (via incorrectstarwarsquotes)

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@double-dwccb

Edd scoffed. “Mother and Father aren’t ever home, I do this cause it pleases me. You dont have study habits. Thats my problem. Now good bye.”

"Yeah, whatever!" Kevin raised his hand, as giving a mock good-bye wave. "Enjoy baking your brains over math, I guess. I'll be outside having fun!"

"Here's some chapstick for all that butt kissing" (doubleddweeb)

“Oh, as opposed to how much butt-kissing you do every day? I don’t know where you get off calling me out.”

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Reblog if you are willing to roleplay with an ESL student

For those of you who don’t know, ESL stands for English as a Second Language.

 It has happened to me more than one time to be discriminated because my sentence structure is a bit different and since people care so much for being literate, I would like to know those who don’t really discriminate, as long as it is understandable and it doesn’t show horrible mistakes that makes it hard to read.

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Kevin rolled his eyes, very tempted to stick his tongue out at the other boy. He didn't, of course - that wasn't a thing cool, strong dudes did.

"What's your problem with my study habits, dweeb? I thought you'd have your hands full worrying about your own precious As that mommy and daddy are so proud of or whatever!"

"Here's some chapstick for all that butt kissing" (doubleddweeb)

“Oh, as opposed to how much butt-kissing you do every day? I don’t know where you get off calling me out.”

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Edd, to just abt anyone that’ll listen. Usually only Ed does, tho.

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"Hey, you started this one, dweeb! Not me!"

"Here's some chapstick for all that butt kissing" (doubleddweeb)

“Oh, as opposed to how much butt-kissing you do every day? I don’t know where you get off calling me out.”

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Kevin rolled his eyes. "If that's what you wanna call it. Whatever you say, teacher's pet!"

"Here's some chapstick for all that butt kissing" (doubleddweeb)

“Oh, as opposed to how much butt-kissing you do every day? I don’t know where you get off calling me out.”

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"Here's some chapstick for all that butt kissing" (doubleddweeb)

“Oh, as opposed to how much butt-kissing you do every day? I don’t know where you get off calling me out.”

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Rude Starters

"I can see your point, but I still think you're full of it."

"I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public."

"I see the screw up fairy has visited again."

"You are validating my inherent mistrust in strangers."

"I'm already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth."

"The fact that no one understands you doesn't mean you're an artist."

"I like you. You remind me of when I was young and stupid."

"I'm not being rude, you're just insignificant."

"You! Get off my planet."

"Too many freaks, not enough circuses."

"Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it?"

"You're not special."

"If I throw a stick, will you leave?"

"Who lit the fuse on your tampon?"

"Oh I get it. It's like humor, but different."

"Aren't you a black hole of need."

"Sure I'll help you out. Which way did you come in?"

"If you have something to say raise your hand, then place it over your mouth."

"I’m too busy, can I ignore you some other time?"

"Don’t let your mind wander, it's too small to be let out on its own."

"Have a nice day, somewhere else."

"You’re not yourself today, I noticed the improvement straight away."

"You are as pretty as a picture, I’d really like to hang you."

"Don’t believe everything you think."

"Do you hear that? That’s the sound of no-one caring."

"Here's some chapstick for all that butt kissing"

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The evolution of heavy metal music. 

(Source)

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Send "☎" to hear what your muse's contact name would be in mine's phone.

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‘out of context D&D quotes’ starters p.3

“Ironically, tasting this blood is the most legal thing I’ve done all day.” “Stand back while I get touchy-feely with this door.” “Goddamn it guys, you’ve been in this jungle for five minutes and you’ve already given the indigenous tribes alcohol and taught them about war!” “Sir, if you have a moment, I’d like to talk to you about spiders.” “I mean, I just want to kill Rudolph.” “But I was screaming diplomatically!” “So… How’s it feel to be outshined by a bird?” “Okay, sounds like the lesbian power couple cover is a go.” “Do not hotbox the sin cube!” “Suck on that one, Anubis.” “’Punched’ is one word. ‘Fisted’ is another.” “Wow. Man arms. …. Marms.” “You know, I seem to remember you being a lot more gung-ho about this before you were on fire.”  “Wait, shit, are we a cult now?” “My grandma fucked a dragon.” “You can’t kinkshame me! I’m the storyteller!” “From an architectural standpoint, we should set it on fire.”  “How do you loose 10,000 oil-soaked rats?!” “My mom said you’re not allowed to kill me tonight.” “Not my brain! I use it to think! … Sometimes!” “Ah, so that’s who the butt belonged to.” “Spoiler alert, your parents are dead.”  “You mean to tell me we busted a hole through the church for nothing?” “We should invent Christianity!” “We will get you tearaway pants. It’s just not our priority right now.” “So… Why did we hire the bear again?” “Where the fuck is the sexy tree?” “PLEASE don’t open any Hell portals in the car!” “Sorry ma’am, your basement is now cinders and a god of rats has cursed your family forever.” “I will eat a human femur one day, but today is not that day.” “It was in my chest cavity, I get to keep it!” “Who wants to desecrate a corpse?” “Goddamn it, you killed the sun.” “You can’t just call dibs on someone’s body parts.” “If we can fit five bodies in here, let’s fit five bodies in here.” “We are not starting a weasel slave market.” “I fell on a bullet that was going the speed of sound.” “You’re an MFD? What’s an MFD?” “Motha fuckin’ DOCTOR.”  “Candles are really cheap. I’d like to buy infinite candles.” “Oh my god! They were alive when they were murdered!” “Are those monkey eggs?” “I’m going to punch the water! Fuck your hydrogen bonds!”