babzilla

[babzilla]

i think for jasons birthdya dick gets him this card

and scribbles out "awful" and writes "groovy 💖💖" overtop in glitter gel pen but leaves the rest of it the same

and jason thinks its SO funny but is SO mad about it. thats what i believe.

[babzilla]

Happy Birthday to my beautiful princess with a disorder ❤️

✨please do not repost or use in any AI programs✨

[babzilla]

newbie fic authors, shooting themselves in the foot: This fic is bad haha I suck at writing lol I am being mean to myself in the hopes that you will be nice to me but actually am dissuading anyone from even clicking on my fic because all I have done to advertise it is tell you why you shouldn't read it

me: I am King Big Dick of Fanfic Mountain and I have arrived in your fandom with the Express Intention of writing my Very Favorite Fics, which I will generously allow you to read. You're welcome.

[babzilla]

i know that when a book describes dragons picking up their riders they probably mean scruffing them by the neck in their mouths like a kitten, but i always imagine something like this

[babzilla]

I really hate how prior to the DCAMU, Talia consistently had an accent in all of her animated appearances, but when they introduced Damian they immediately gave her an American accent because they knew that it will not make sense for Damian to sound like a regular white American boy when he was raised by her aboard and since obviously they can’t just give Batman’s son an accent, nope, one of the most iconic characters in American media can’t possibly have a brown immigrant son.

[babzilla]

Me, Jason-pilled: is decapitated heads in bags even THAT BAD in Gotham??

[babzilla]

LORD OF THE RINGS: RETURN OF THE KING

[babzilla]

free free palestine 🇵🇸

[babzilla]

Maedhros: Whenever you ask a man’s height, he’ll add an inch. If he’s 6 foot, he’ll say he’s 6'1’’, and so on.

Maedhros: Not me though. I subtract four inches. I say I’m 5'9’’.

Maedhros: Especially when there’s other men in the room. And then I watch them panic. Not only have I exposed his lie, but now he thinks he’s 5'3’’.

Maedhros: What I do is not a crime, but it should be.

[babzilla]

Every time Sean Astin makes a statement on whether or not Sam and Frodo were indeed gay for each other in lord of the rings he’s always like “well we have to acknowledge that attitudes around sexuality have changed dramatically over the past several decades and since authorial intent is only up to speculation, the story is open to multiple readings, some of which might have different significances for different groups of people also they kiss on the lips because I said so”

[babzilla]

[babzilla]

Tiers of relationship subterfuge in ascending order of difficulty:

Level 1: Fake married

Level 2: Fake owning partners of fictitious business

Level 3: Fake running mates in fraudulent campaign for political office

Level 4: Fake immortal nemeses fulfilling invented apocalyptic prophecy

Level 5: Fake opposing/complementary aspects of fabricated chthonic deity

Level 6: Actually married and obliged to pretend you don’t know each other

[babzilla]

tragedy enjoyers when a character perpetuates the cycle of violence they themselves were a victim of

[babzilla]

Genre of character: submissive like a guard dog is submissive

[babzilla]

don't make me turn my character development around

[babzilla]

I don’t understand how people think characters can be reduced to just one word or one skill/trait. All of these characters are multifaceted! They don’t just have one specialty and fall apart at anything else.

[babzilla]

I understand the appeal of wanting every adult hero to instinctively adopt teenage Peter Parker, but can it really beat the hilarity of acknowledging that at 15 Peter was 5'10", unusually buff, went by a moniker with Man in it, wore a creepy full face mask, and had a tightly guarded secret identity and probably a Queens accent thick enough to have come out of a jello mold, and adult heroes reasonably responded to him by going, “Wow, this grown man is an immature asshole for no reason.”