awknerdness

[awknerdness]

They should be rewarded for not being people. I hate people.

April Ludgate

[awknerdness]

Oh -- it says 'NYMPHO' on the butt in silver sparkly letters. 'Nympho' means you're addicted to sex... and since it's on the butt, there's implications as well. So those are a maybe"

Tom Haverford

[awknerdness]

I don't want to do things. I want to not do things. Just like you taught me.

April Ludgate

[awknerdness]

Well, I'm in a little bit of a lull... right now. But I'm so glad that you all have people you in your lives that you care about. So, congrats! It's really hard to say 'Congrats' without sounding sarcastic. Seriously, I really hope you guys are all very happy... damn it.

Ann Perkins

[awknerdness]

When I eat, it is the food that is scared.

Ron Swanson

[awknerdness]

Any asshole can be a father. I WANT TO BE A CHAMPION!

Kevin

[awknerdness]

I still think awards are stupid. But they'd be less stupid if they went to the right people.

Ron Swanson

[awknerdness]

You want to talk about spreading and sheets, we can go back to my place, I will rock your... that makes sense. So, I just go out the same way I came in?

Jean-Ralphio

[awknerdness]

Dude, if you think that's bad, go to Google Earth and type in your address. Boom.

April Ludgate

[awknerdness]

Yeah, we got the freaking moon! What are you going to do without tides, Peru?

Leslie Knope

[awknerdness]

I'd like to do a remake of Kazaam with Shaquille O'Neal where he plays a genie. And I'd like to get it right.

Andy Dwyer

[awknerdness]

Yay! Finally got my copy of Pawnee: The Greatest Town in America from Amazon. Treat Yo Self!

[awknerdness]

I need a DJ to announce he's in the building to announce that I'm in the building... and a "Treat Yo' Self" day to treat myself to the good stuff (clothes, shoes, video games, alcohol, etc.)

[awknerdness]

And they would never cancel 'Game of Thrones'. It's a crossover hit. It's not just for fantasy enthusiasts. They're telling human stories in a fantasy world.

Ben Wyatt

[awknerdness]

Just win, baby!

Al Davis

[awknerdness]

Whenever people get too chummy with me, I like to call them by the wrong name to let them know I don't really care about them.

Ron Swanson

[awknerdness]

Look, there's something you should know about me I've been trying to hide it but It's time I tell someone the truth. I know it's going to sound crazy but here goes... I'm awkward.

Ryan from Wilfred