avoidantcreachure

[avoidantcreachure]

[avoidantcreachure]

posting this off queue because i only realized just now i missed a number last time. polls will continue to be posted on a queue of 2 per day after this.

[avoidantcreachure]

Poll question: Do you struggle with the concept of "favorites"? Do you feel like you don't have a favorite anything for any category?

Poll options:

Yes, I don't have favorites for anything

I have favorite objects/hobbies, but I can't form favorite people

I have favorite people, but I can't form favorite objects/hobbies

No, but I never remember my favorites of anything when asked

No, but my favorites change constantly

No, I don't struggle with favorites at all

I am unsure

There is too much nuance in how/when I can form favorites to fit in a poll option

[OP's note: "favorite person" in this context refers to people you like/enjoy more than others, not the BPD related meaning]

[avoidantcreachure]

For those that prefer polyamory, do you find that polyamory comforts your AVPD in ways that monogamy doesn't?

1. I prefer polyamory mainly because of my AVPD

2. I prefer polyamory and it just happens to mesh well with my AVPD

3. My AVPD has no affect on my preference for polyamory

4. My AVPD makes polyamory more difficult, but I prefer it anyways

5. Some AVPD things make it harder, some make it easier, it's a mixed bag

6. I have AVPD and I do not prefer polyamory

Personally, I'm glad that if I'm going through a period of isolation then my partner can get their romantic and sexual needs met elsewhere until I'm back again. I also don't fear them leaving me for someone else, because if they want to be with someone they'll just discuss it with me and still also be in love with me anyways. If I suddenly become suspicious of my partner and don't trust them anymore, I could ask their other partners if I'm over reacting. They know them romantically just as well as I do, so if something is wrong then they'd have experience with sensing it too.

Monogamous relationships, on the other hand, terrify me. Imagine being expected to meet your partner's exact definition of attractive? Imagine not being able to fulfill all your partner's needs and that means they're gone -- you weren't good enough so they left. That's scary shit.

[avoidantcreachure]

scared of the world

[avoidantcreachure]

Me after hanging out with friends:

Omg I had such I great time with you all however after analyzing our conversation I’ve come to the conclusion that you all didn’t want me there and hate me... Same time next month?

[avoidantcreachure]

me: why do i always feel left out

also me: [does not join in]

[avoidantcreachure]

typing a text like

“yeah no it’s all good sorry i just overreacted because i always assume everyone is mad at me and im afraid to take up any emotional space haha-

*backspace*

“its totally ok! sorry i overreacted, i always assume everyone is mad at me.”

…

*backspace*

“it’s ok! sorry haha”

[avoidantcreachure]

[avoidantcreachure]

god my brain is so hardwired to feel ashamed after any social interaction that even after there's objectively nothing to feel ashamed over i still feel terrible

[avoidantcreachure]

I wanna talk to you but there’s a knife in my throat.

[avoidantcreachure]

the avoidants™ literally OWNED the concept of ghosting before the fuckbois gentrified it

[avoidantcreachure]

avpd culture is

[avoidantcreachure]

how to tell if this is avpd, quiet bpd, or me being dramatic and lonely and embarrassing and

[avoidantcreachure]

saw a reply on a post by an avpd blog that said something like “those people aren’t real good friends!! you should find people who-“ and i was like i’m gonna cut you off right there, not being able to do that is like my central character aspect… that’s the name of the disorder

[avoidantcreachure]

avpd imposter syndrome where i have more than one or two friends so i must be faking!!! … but every friend i’ve had i’ve known for years because i struggle with making new friends. and most of my friendships formed because someone decided to befriend me and then were there when i came back from disappearing. each time.

[avoidantcreachure]

Here’s some positivity for systems with AvPD!

AvPD (avoidant personality disorder) is a serious mental illness that can have negative affects on many systems. However, the plural folks living with this disorder still deserve to live happy, healthy lives to the best of their ability! This post is for the systems out there with AvPD!

🐠 Shoutout to systems whose severe social anxiety led them to develop AvPD!

🌊 Shoutout to systems who struggle to maintain relationships or form bonds and positive connections with people in their lives!

🦀 Shoutout to systems whose trauma history led them to form both a dissociative disorder and AvPD!

🐬 Shoutout to systems who don’t want many friends, and who feel the most safe, happy, and comfortable when they are by themselves!

🏝 Shoutout to systems who have been diagnosed with AvPD professionally, to those who have self-diagnosed, and to those who are questioning if they have this disorder!

🐟 Shoutout to systems who are in treatment for their AvPD, and are trying to learn how to cope with their symptoms in positive ways!

🐚 Shoutout to systems who do want friends, who feel lonely all the time, and whose AvPD causes them lots of pain and distress!

🐡 Shoutout to systems whose AvPD has caused them to feel hopeless, listless, sullen, and dismayed! We promise there’s still hope for you yet!

🐳 Shoutout to individual headmates who are AvPD symptom holders, or who struggle with their disorder more than the rest of their system!

🏝 Shoutout to systems with dissociative disorders whose AvPD has caused them to split new alters!

🦈 Shoutout to nontraumagenic systems who consciously created their system as a way to cope with their disorder!

It can be so hard existing in society with a disorder that makes it difficult to form interpersonal relationships or have positive interactions with other people. However, for folks with AvPD out there, we want you to know that there’s hope in your future, and potential for peace, joy, and happiness!

Please treat yourself and your system with kindness, and try to not judge yourself too hard by societal standards! Having a disorder that affects how you form and maintain relationships does not make you unwanted, unloveable, or unaccepted by the people in your life or the plural community. Whether or not you’re too scared, nervous, or shy to interact, please know we care about you, we’re rooting for you, and we wish you the very best in all that you do!

(Image ID:) A pale orange userbox with a cluster of multicolored flowers for the userbox image. The border and text are both dark orange, and the text reads “all plurals can interact with this post!” (End ID.)