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I was overthinking this way too much so I'm just posting it now. Biting off more than you can chew for year of the snake

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[Splashtail headcanon]

as an individual, splashtail is particularly featherbrained and clueless. he thinks life is this huge game that he can easily control, viewing everyone except himself and a few close acquaintances as 'NPCs'. the world is his playground and he takes center stage!

by himself, splashtail's not really that big of a threat. he throws a lot of temper tantrums when things don't go his way, or when cats or not following through his orders. he lacks a commanding presence, and every "cool villain" posture he displays is a complete front. any fatalities he cause by his own claws is something that he simply sees as a "happy accident".

the only real thing that makes him a real threat is by how manipulative he is. his insanity. despite the dramatic, theatrical display and the occasional crack in his voice, he somehow manages to persuade an entire group by instilling them with either fear or purpose.

he's CRAZY!

as mentioned, he views life as a fun game, as this one big performance with a crowd to please. so he's not gonna hold back on doling out the most bizarre threats. "put him through a cheese grater!" and with enough bravo, he may actually persuade fearful cats to do just that.

he takes huge risks.

even if this involves throwing himself into the unpredictable, he won't stop at anything to realize his goals to "renew riverclan". besides, he doesn't take his leadership role seriously, so what's there to lose?

he lacks any real fighting skills so by himself, splashtail is just a measly fly. but allow this cat to have a huge following of convinced or fearful cats, especially of more battle-trained cats? either stay on his good side, or take him down at all costs.

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They say to never meet your heroes...

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Curlfeather in-game cutscene

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fatphobia is so wild. the fact that gaining weight on HRT is always framed as a "negative potential side effect" when it's like a genuinely desirable effect. I feel like half the shit people say about HRT is like "uh oh, you might experience everything you want and get hotter" like heaven forbid, lmao

[auracinnabon]

hairy butch arms. hairy butch legs. butch happy trail. crooked butch smiles. butch happiness. send post.

[auracinnabon]

hairy butch arms. hairy butch legs. butch happy trail. crooked butch smiles. butch happiness. send post.

[auracinnabon]

hairy butch arms. hairy butch legs. butch happy trail. crooked butch smiles. butch happiness. send post.

[auracinnabon]

hairy butch arms. hairy butch legs. butch happy trail. crooked butch smiles. butch happiness. send post.

[auracinnabon]

hairy butch arms. hairy butch legs. butch happy trail. crooked butch smiles. butch happiness. send post.

[auracinnabon]

hairy butch arms. hairy butch legs. butch happy trail. crooked butch smiles. butch happiness. send post.

[auracinnabon]

hairy butch arms. hairy butch legs. butch happy trail. crooked butch smiles. butch happiness. send post.

[auracinnabon]

hairy butch arms. hairy butch legs. butch happy trail. crooked butch smiles. butch happiness. send post.

[auracinnabon]

some kind of naga dragon 

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Naga with legs? There’s actually a Thai creature like that called a Hayra.

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i haven’t used a bong in 12 years bc when i was 19 i hit a bong at a party that was so tall you had to stand on a step ladder to get your mouth on it & then i called my older brother in another timezone sobbing on the toilet and he asked what was wrong and i said i couldn’t tell if i had peed or was peeing or had stopped peeing and i said “what if im still peeing and i walk back out to the party with my pants on and i’m still peeing and i can’t tell and i pee everywhere” and he took a deep breath and mustered all of the patience in the entire world in that moment and said “i cannot stress enough how much that will not happen.”