ask-hyrules-guardians

[ask-hyrules-guardians]

I'm sending y'all some plushies and you can't stop me

I don’t think the Koroks will be letting go of these anytime soon, but thank you regardless!

[ask-hyrules-guardians]

...I think I’ll give the Slate back. I need to stay with Satori for a little bit. This was... fun.

[ask-hyrules-guardians]

scared of... fi?

I said I'm not scared of Fi!

Her blade is just... sharp. Pretty unforgiving. I feel bad for anything that gets skewered on it.

[ask-hyrules-guardians]

Could you let a doggy for me?

There’s no dogs where I hid from the others, but I will as soon as I can.

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Let's talk about your issues, link.

What issues? I don’t have any. Satori was mistaken.

Besides, I got my grief over and done with in Hyrule Castle. So what if that’s not how it works for mortals? That’s how it works for me. My fear of tight spaces is normal. I’m not even that scared of Fi. I can be near Hyrule Castle without a bad reaction most of the time.

I’m fine.

[ask-hyrules-guardians]

Who's link from the zonai

...

The hero before Zelda. He was the last warrior of his people, I think. A childhood friend of the princess of the time. He led the four pilots of the Sheikah-made war machines.

He taught me sign language. I was his guide.

He died relatively young.

[ask-hyrules-guardians]

What was the noodle incident? The one in which you turned into a noodle

This I can talk about! Impa was giving a class to some younger Sheikah on the various parts of Hylian bodies (and how to incapacitate them) and I was bored, so I helped spar to demonstrate takedowns. Apparently you need to have a kidney for some of those moves to work on you. Plus whatever a “solar plexus” is. Long story short, Impa got irritated and asked if I was deliberately getting rid of body parts to spite her. I said no. To prove it, I got rid of the bones in my arm to show that she’d notice the magic feedback if I did.

Impa didn’t like that very much. The kids thought it was funny!

[ask-hyrules-guardians]

?????????????????

I have questions too, buddy

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THATS WHERE MY SPARE STOMACH ACID WENT-

I... did not steal... your stomach acid... what the hell? I was under the impression mortals don't just delete body parts like that!

[ask-hyrules-guardians]

Excuse me where did you get the stomach acid from

Wouldn't you like to know, anonymous?

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is there a patron deity of The Gays

In some circles, the fact that my gender is fluid is taken as patronage of anyone who breaks those barriers. I don't think it's a proper part of my domain yet, but maybe someday...?

Aside from that, no one I know. Mortals like that are doing just fine on their own.

[ask-hyrules-guardians]

I'm sending you so much soup rn. Feast yourself

Soup soul, you're back! I appreciate it. Turns out I needed stomach acid after all, but I have that now, so at least I can digest it this time.

[ask-hyrules-guardians]

This is boring. But I can’t just go back now, or Zelda won’t have cooled off yet. I can’t talk to the others, or they’ll tell me to put the Slate back.

I could talk to you guys, though... how about it? All the juicy details I keep getting censored for.

[ask-hyrules-guardians]

:3

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if link became mortal again for a day would you trust him with the sheikah slate

“Again”? Link was never mortal in the first place. That said, I would never under any circumstances trust him not to do something mischievous with it. 

Hey!

I trust you with my life, Link, not with non-vital responsibilities.

Understandable. Just for that, though-

HEY!

[ask-hyrules-guardians]

gang with the sheikah slate what crimes will they commit

I carry the Slate with me at all times. There’s no way anyone could get it away from me to do crimes--no, not even Robbie and Purah, even they ask first.

Hypothetically, the crimes would definitely involve disturbing the peace.

[ask-hyrules-guardians]

Pet the doggy

It's truly fascinating that the most powerful communication method in living memory is used for this. Fine, I'll go find a dog to pet...