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Me texting: "hey sorry I can't make it."

No reply

Me: oh no

Me: I've done it

Me: she hates me

Me: I'm so selfish I can't believe I did this

Me: I've lost her forever

Me: I am garbage, selfish shitty garbage

Me: actual garbage coming through!

Me texting: "I mean... If that okay? I could probably organise some stuff if you needed me to come, like don't worry haha"

Her texting: No problem! Sorry was busy.

Me: nailed it.

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Signal boost. 

We need your help!

There is a special little girl in my life named Inara. She was born with Williams Syndrome and on April 24th there will be a 5k run/walk in Jefferson, GA for children born with this disease. Go to https://www.classy.org/checkout/register?eid=73721&ftid=72672 to register for the walk or https://www.classy.org/fundraise/team?ftid=72672 to donate if you don’t live in the area! She and her family are very near and dear to my heart and the community. Any little bit helps! 

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River Song appreciation week

favorite trait: bisexuality

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This is really just me talking about my feelings, I’m a good 99.95% chance sure you don’t care but I feel like for me to fully accept where I am at right now I need to write it out fully and honestly. 

I have never honestly identified as straight.  When I was 16 I dated my best friend and she still is, but I was a stupid kid who buckled under pressure. When I told my parents they were not supportive, they threatened to kick me out, they called priests, told me it was a phase and if it wasn’t then i’d be disowned. I was a coward who was so desperate for acceptance that I became a cunt, I went back into my closet and played straight. I wasn’t of course but I told myself that it wasn’t that I was gay, no it was just this one girl. 

I became easily manipulated and used by men, I thought if I let them flirt, if I let them see me, if I played straight i’d be happy. This guy I didn’t like, he would emotionally blackmail me into doing things I didn’t want to do and I would agree because I hated myself but positive reinforcement made me feel like I was doing the right thing. He told me that he liked me despite my size, despite my nose, despite the frizzy hair and fat thighs. He had a way of ripping my self esteem to shreds before awkwardly piecing it back together, giving the underlying impression  that he was the only one who could. I still hate my nose and hair because he would point it out to me, I still straighten it because he told me it looked better. 

I was suicidal. If it hadn’t of been for that girl, my best friend I would have gone through with it. I almost did on multiple occasions, but just having that support there made such a huge difference. It kept me sane, just not happy. 

So when I was singled out by a really C-grade youtube local celebrity I had been following for a few years I thought that this would be the start. Yes he was over 10 years older than I was, yes he was married but he was getting a ‘divorce’. The first ‘date’ was not a date at all. He picked me up, told me he changed his mind about  going out and took me back to his place.  I should have known then and there that this was not a good sign. We got there and he was really only interested in one thing, which I was not interested in. He didn’t exactly take no for an answer, he was pushy and physical. He told me he loved me on the first date. 

The relationship was awful, he was aggressive and manipulate. He made sure everything was on his terms and made sure I felt like he was doing me the favor but at that stage I hated myself so much I really thought he was. He was angry a lot and made sure I knew it, It wasn’t even so much his fault because I think he knew I didn’t really want to be there and he was just holding so tightly. I wasn’t being true to myself but I just could never love him the way he wanted me too and that must have hurt so he would lash out. It took a lot for me to break up with him, he threatened to kill himself, accused me of using him which in retrospect wasn’t that far of the mark just not in the way he was inferring. 

The six months/year that followed I floated by, not happy not sad but not living. Eventually I had the lowest point i’ve ever had. It wasn’t a sexuality issue, it wasn’t a mans fault, it was me. I couldn’t cope with the build up of life or lack there of. I felt like my life was empty, that my job wasn’t going anywhere -which it still isnt- that I was failing myself and my dreams. 

I made the choice one day to change that. I started apply for other jobs, which i still haven’t heard back from, I made it a personal challenge to socialize, get out of the house, live a little. I joined a dating  app which I’d always been so apprehensive about, terrified of rejection and I met a girl. The only girl I messaged, the only one I replied too. It was like making the choice to be happy was all I needed to start actually BEING happy. It was so different to anything I’d experienced, we spoke non-stop for hours, she was funny and kind and very sarcastic but most importantly, she didn’t want anything from me. I didn’t feel like a piece of meat.  I am happy, the happiest I’ve been in six years. Not because of her - though she is helping - but because I finally feel like I am who I should have been. I’m looking at myself thinking, shes not actually as bad as people said, in fact she’s actually kinda cool... And that maybe she’ll keep getting better and I want to be around to see that. 

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who are you?

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It’s been 3 years and it’s still one of my favourite moments in British television of this decade. Ladies and gentlemen, Jack Whitehall and James Corden (from The Big Fat Quiz of the Year 2012)

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57 Facts That Prove The Oscars Are (And Have Always Been) So White

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Hep C in Australia

The government just placed THE CURE for Hep C on the PBS, Pharmaceutical Benefits Scheme which will see their cost fall from around $100,000 to just $6.10 for concessional patients and $37.70 for general patients.They will be spending over a billion dollars to produce this drug and sell it at an affordable price to the general public.  

This is the cure to an illness that millions of Australians live with will be less than $40.  Though we are still a problematic nation with a long, long way to go, this is one of the best steps we’ve taken in a long time. 

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“She’s got ice in her heart, and a kiss on her lips and a vulnerable side she keeps well-hidden”

[insp.]

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“God knows where he is right now but I promise you, he’s doing whatever the hell he wants and not giving a damn about me! And I’m just fine with that!” “River–” “When you love the Doctor, it’s like loving the stars themselves! You don’t expect a sunset to admire you back! And if I happen to find myself in danger, let me tell you the Doctor is not stupid enough or sentimental enough and he is certainly not in love enough to find himself standing in it with me!

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Okay except the reason the specific dudes got a mention was because they were references from history, aka people who had not seen the show would find that intriguing to learn that these "white dudes" from history get a wicked twist. If I said the name "Helen Magnus" do you think someone who hadn't seen it would be even remotely interested?

Famous people this show includes Jack the Ripper Nikola Tesla Big Foot

The only ones who get named, did I name Will? No. Did I even picture him? No. Why because he doesn't spark interest in people who had never seen the show. What does spark interest? Badass women kicking bad asses. This wasn't a promo for fans of the show, we already know all about how wonderful it is, how epic the story is, how amazing Amanda Tapping is.... It was made for people who haven't seen it.

So please don't infer that I'm a sexist girl obsessed with "white dudes" because I'm a lesbian that if you bothered to actually go to my blog you'd learn is far, far more interested women.

Thanks.

Why are people not more into Sanctuary?

 - Alcoholic Vampire Pervert Nikola Tesla

- Teleporting serial killer Jack The Ripper (John Druitt)

- Physically disabled James Watson (Inspiration for John Watson and Sherlock as the guy is both combined)

-Chemistry between Watson and Jack the Ripper “Night after night I poured my insights into you” oooop 

- There is a smart ass bigfoot that likes to slap people on the back of the head

- Badass women kicking some badass

- Seriously Watson and Jack the ripper “you dont know how much you hurt her…” “Hurt her? … Or you?” Then James grabs him by the shirt and pulls him in angrily. Holding him on either side of the face… Inches away… 

- Main Chick is Bi-sexual 

- Werewolf genius 

- MUSICAL EPISODE

- So many ships. Honestly, I ship so many people in this show its insane. 

- All the chicks are fucking hot as fuck

- Time Travel! We see Nazi’s and old England

- Travel in general! oh man some of the scenery is GORG like obnoxiously large moons…. 

- MERMAID BY THE WAY DID I MENTION  THERES A FUCKING MERMAID? 

WATCH. THE. SHOW

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fuck

i’m

falling

down

all

these

stairs

today is possibly the last day to reblog this post in its original format. make it count

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"You have a type"

I dont see it.  Bonus!

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EEEEEEE

i used to hate sloths but this has changed something in my heart and i want to say sorry to all the sloths ive insulted

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obscure-affection  peter-pan-sexxxual Whoop

the lone gay friend in the friend group is such a lie

honestly give it like 5 years and the same friend group will have the one straight friend

we group together before we even know it