amalama

[amalama]

Household Chore Reward System for Big Families on a Budget

So I have long lamented paying the kids to do chores for 2 reasons- 1 is just plain old money.  I have 5 kids, so that's a serious concern.  The other is that we all have to do things to help the family and you shouldn't need to be paid for that- nobody pays me.  BUT, I also have grown weary of battling and nagging.  A motivation to get jobs done with less stress and annoyance for me is what I need.  

So I figured out a system using points for certain jobs.  Some are assigned each day and some are optional for additional points.  Sometimes something needs to be done and isn't a regular task, so I reserve the right to assign it (like weeding).

So far, it is going so well.  We've been doing it a few weeks and the kids have even commented about how much cleaner the house is and are each saving for something special.  One is plotting to save up for 3 extra staying up late hours in a row. A typical day of assigned work has morning and afternoon jobs, one major job or two-three minor jobs. Not all jobs need to be done each day, either, so they aren't assigned more than once per week.

The jobs and points value (we all take turns with these and each kid only does things like cooking once per week with the littles paired up with the bigs to cook together): 

Dishes (clean put away, dirty in dishwasher, pans washed, counters and sink wiped) 10 points

Bathroom- Light duty (Change hand towel, wipe faucet, counter, sink and toilet handle, straighten towels) 3 points

Bathroom- Full duty, older kids only (Clean mirror, clean sink and handles, counter, toilet, empty trash, change towels) 10 points

Laundry- (Wash own clothes, bed sheets, bath towel, dry, fold and put away) 3 points

Cooking- (Plan mean for next time, make meal, clean up ingredients) 5 points

Wipe Dinner Table- 3 points

Vacuum upstairs or downstairs- 4 points

Dusting- (Living room, family room) 3 points

Morning Tasks- Done by 7am on school days, 10am on weekends (Lotion, dressed, teeth brushed, lunch in backpack) 3 points

School Prep- (Reading, homework, lunch made, backpack and shoes ready, clothes picked out, room straightened) 3 points

Sweep Kitchen- 3 points

Garbage/Recycling- 3 points

Garbage Can Taken to Road- 3 points (in snow, 5 points) 

Optional jobs:

Shower scrub- 7 points

Weeding- 5 points

Dog poop pick up- 5 points

Mowing grass- 15 points

Clean microwave in and out- 5 points

Clean out fridge- 7 points

The rewards:  These were developed with the kids and they did a great job! 

Dessert for the Family (baked or store bought)- 25 points

Friend over- 50 points

Friend Sleepover- 100 points

Get out of Punishment Free- 50 points

Job Trade with Someone- 50 points

Give your Job to Someone Else- 100 points

Activity with a Friend (like going to the movies)- 500 points

1 Hour of Extra Electronic Time- 50 points

Stay Up an Extra Hour- 100 points (limit 1 hour on school night, no limit on weekends)

Go Out to Dinner with Mom- 200 points

The rules:

Jobs must be completed by the assigned time in order to earn points.  Morning jobs (which include all of the self-care like brushing teeth, combing hair, etc) need to be done by 7am on school days, 10am on weekends. It has to be done no matter what, but getting points only happens if you do it on time.

Jobs must be done well.  If you were assigned (or picked) a job and it isn't done well, you get no points and have to redo it. If it takes a second reminder, then you lost technology privileges for the day.  A third and you get an early bedtime added in.  In short, a job worth doing is a job worth doing well!

Kids keep track of their COMPLETED jobs on a small paper each day known as their paycheck.  They write down the title of the job and the points.  All paychecks have to be turned in to me at 7pm, which is also the time all assigned jobs must be complete (if they aren't done, then no pay, no technology and an early bedtime).  I total them and initial.  They must save their pay in a safe place.

Points do not carry over to the next day.  If you forgot to have me sign, then you're out of luck.

[amalama]

Thoughts on Closure

So, what happens when you have so much to say, but don't really want to say anything?  Well, sometimes you think maybe you should just explain and get it over with or... you think that those that truly are loving will continue to be so and won't demand an explanation.  If you weren't close enough to "know," then, why should you be now?

Here are some things I think most people should consider on their end, though...

1. Who decided that an ending just HAS to be awful?  Maybe it is possible for 2 people to be mature and loving towards all inflicted parties with great love, care and attention on the children.  Maybe THEY are a bit relieved too, even though it means some changes.  That is possible, you know.

2. Do you REALLY think that serious thought, pain, love and anguish did NOT go into this decision?  That years weren't spent trying to make it work?  For the children?  

3. A lot of the times the hang ups we have about others, and find the easiest to judge, are the ones that produce deep fear in ourselves. 

And like Forrest Gump, that's all I have to say about that.

[amalama]

One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest Truth

"...And I got sick. It wasn't the practices, I don't think, it was the feeling that the great, deadly, pointing forefinger of society was pointing at me- and the great voice of millions chanting, 'Shame. Shame. Shame.' It's society's way of dealing with someone different." -from "One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest," by Ken Kesey

[amalama]

Trade Off's- Internet and Privacy

I am a huge fan of our beloved Internet. I can't lie. I stay connected with people that I wouldn't normally be able to without it.  We can talk to anyone, anywhere and at anytime.  Young to old, we're almost all on there communication through our preferred methods (Facebook, Twitter, emails, Skype, etc).  It just is the way things are done now.  It is damned convenient.

The recent revelation about the NSA and them (shocker) spying on people through social media (etc.) has gotten a lot of attention. One of my favorite books by my favorite author, George Orwell's "1984," has become a best seller all over again (really if you haven't read it, I hope you will as what it has to say, it's terrifying accuracy and clear vision for where we're headed, plus Orwell's ability to not have a single word out of place, make it a tragedy not to).  Big Brother IS watching.  Big Brother will keep watching and finding more ways to needle into our lives and guess what?  We're going to just let it happen.

Even as we continue on and realize the potential for damage from these niceties from the Internet, we're all too damned hooked to make any backpedaling changes to reclaim our privacy.  All anybody is going to do is bitch about it.  It will be the rare soul that decides to go off the cyber-grid to really own their privacy again. 

Computer forensics when a crime has been committed with the ability to read every word of every email and any search you ever did, all used in a court of law to convict you.  Social media spying tuned into key words that might reveal that you are involved in terrorism of some kind.  And what about these little cameras we all have build into our computers?  I wonder what the potential is there?

What am I going to do about it? Give up Facebook, Twitter, Google, Gmail, Yahoo Email?  No, I'm just going to bitch and be very concerned about where this is all going. I do feel that once we've decided not to stand for it, that we may have lost our liberties to the point that there will be nothing we can do, except pledge our allegiance to Big Brother and behave the way we're supposed to so nobody shows up at our door to arrest us for violating the ideals of the government.

Scary thoughts.  Very scary.

[amalama]

Netflix Replacing TV- "The Accused"

So, we gave up cable a while ago. Cutting back, plus, really we had very few shows we watched regularly. Seemed a silly waste of resources to pay so much when we used it so little. We've had Netflix with the movies for a while, but decided to get streaming as a TV replacement. I will first say this- it is NOT an even trade at all.  I miss my TV!  Netflix's selection blows hairy chunks!

I have watched tons of movies I have never thought I would watch, plus some I always meant to watch and some TV series.  I've also watched WAY more crappy movies than I ever have before.  

Today I was checking off a thousand things from my to-do list (of hellish agony- GOD I need a personal assistant!) and realized the mountain of laundry that needed to be folded rivaled Mt. Fuji, so it was time for another movie to pass the time as I folded little underpants and whatnot.  I picked one I always meant to watch... "The Accused" with Jodi Foster.

I have to say, I am not sure I've had a more physical reaction to a movie in more than 20 years.  I had heard about the gang rape scene, but as I watched it, tears rolled down my face and I felt like I was on the verge of vomiting.  The degradation, objectification and pure soullessness were more than I could handle.  I felt rage.  

It connected so closely with the recent happenings in the news with the 3 women that were help captive for a decade.  As I read the details in the news, I felt that same wash of repulsion and fierce hatred.  Knowing that, honestly, these women will never be free of the torture that was inflicted upon them and the years of work they have ahead of them to have any chance at peace is heartbreaking. Hearing that this "man" is pleading innocent AND his defense attorneys are claiming what a loving and nurturing father he was are almost more than I can handle.

It is difficult for me to accept that there is any hate in my heart (oh sure, I am super sassy and give people crap, but anyone that knows me knows I am loving), but when evil men dominate women violently, that'll do it to me (or the abuse of children), though I must say that I've seen plenty of movies with violence against women that did NOT produce that sort of reaction, but "The Accused" was so well-done that I would doubt that scene would be easy for anyone to watch.

I've been super busy all day, but during my unoccupied moments, I am realizing that I won't be able to shake that movie for a while.  I am glad I saw it, because it was a very good movie, but I am thinking that maybe I should steer away from the "critically acclaimed" Netflix selections and stick with the crappy movies, for my peace of mind.

[amalama]

Health is Not a Fad

I grow weary of the product, program, diet pushing business that so many people get wrapped up in.  Most people won’t maintain the regiment of any program to lose the weight.  If they do, they usually bounce right back to their fluffier versions once they quit because, really, they didn’t change anything.  They didn’t learn to be healthy, they only lost weight.

I, though it isn’t sexy or exciting, just wish people would look at making their health a priority (not that looking good isn’t a fantastic byproduct, oh it is) by living better for good.  Change habits, reasonably, and have a little patience with themselves as they adjust.

The following thoughts aren’t new and I’ve talked about them before, but I think they’re worth repeating:

Eat what you want, but a small portion of the naughty.  Really you should be able to have chocolate, pizza, Doritos or whatever, but set yourself up with the portion you should have in advance.  Be realistic about how many treats you need to allow yourself in a day.  

Change your bad habits one at a time, removing completely or replacing it with a healthy alternative (if you eat a ton of food after 6pm, make a new rule that you can have only veggies, air popped popcorn or fruit after 6). Once you’ve got one down, move onto the next. Be honest with yourself about where you need work.

Anything that requires too much discipline is very likely to disappoint.  Restrictive diets do not allow you to live a full life.  Everybody needs to have a piece of birthday cake. If you must have the structure, I say Weight Watchers is the best choice out there.  You eat real food the entire time and learn how to eat, to a certain extent.  

Food consumption should be a joy and a nourishment of your body.  Savor whatever you eat.

Move doing things you love.  If you hate it, you won’t keep doing it.  Think of changing to an active lifestyle- play soccer with your kids and go for walks with your true love.  I dance and hike, but have incorporated some really challenging things for me lately (like push ups and planks), but I do them because I like feeling challenged at this point in my fitness level.  If I’d started off with those, my ass would still be bulging into my couch.

Think of today realistically.  If you already had a lil’ something that’s naughty, that’s fine, but you probably shouldn’t have anymore today, unless you’re PMS-ing then, by all means, have another treat!  We all want you to be happy.  :)

A bad meal or two a week isn’t going to be problematic at all, if that’s all you have.  Life is pretty good when you know that you can have pizza this weekend and that burger tonight.  And you can have your little indulgences daily.  

There is a lot more I could say, but this’ll do for now.  Wishing you health!

[amalama]

Direction- High School

We move on through life and it is curiouser and curiouser.  Through interesting life circumstances, I now know that I LOVE working with high school students.  Like I can't believe how much I love it.  It feels like "it" to me.

I've always been told I should be a teacher or a lawyer.  I fought teaching for a long time, but ended up in elementary through convenience.  I wanted to be a music teacher.  I never entertained high school in all my days and I am not sure I would have except that my path crossed with people I used to know that encouraged me to sub for them at the high school. I still remember shaking when I passed out the papers to that first class (thanks Cappy!).

Then, it took me a bit to get comfortable.  Now that I am and I have worked in lots of different classes (so I see students in a variety of classes and in the halls), I feel just blessed to get to work with these young people.   I get so much from talking with them, listening to them, talking about life, and getting things done.  I do my best to support them and help them (they know I care and that is a universal good), but I am fun and sassy, too.  It is a fun combo with where they are in life.  So lovely to know it.

I talked with a boy in the percussion ensemble about superficiality and spiritualism.  He talked with me about his journaling and what is important to him.  That was just in short time frame, right at the end of a productive session.

So, I am going to try to get in there, either a quick way or a slow way, but either way, this is happening.  I am a high school teacher!  Looking into English/Language Arts.  Gotta finish my masters first.  

I cannot finish this project!  It is weighing on me like an elephant after a chili eating contest.  

[amalama]

Sad

Words are ridiculous when actions show otherwise. Willingness to take, even when you know it is too much, is a profound action. Hearts can only be open for so long and then they start to close.

It isn't a decision to make, but an inevitability. 

[amalama]

Made for Life? No, we're not, but thanks!

It is funny.  Perceptions since winning "the contest" have people thinking that we are in such a different place than we are financially.  I literally had a teacher I subbed for announce to his class that I don't even need the money, but sub because I want to.  Uhhhhhhh, okaaaaaaay...

Here is the deal.  A million isn't a million.  It is 600K once taxes are paid.  Pay off nearly 60k in student loans, buy a house outright, pay off other debts like car loans & credit cards, give money to certain charities (though not even 1/64th of the ones I've been asked to contribute too, often with a gentle reminder about how much people voted for me or how sore their fingers still are from voting), help family members/friends out, put a little aside for the kids' education (5 kids I might remind you), take an amazing vacation with my mom, start up a Da Vinci-inspired program to visit schools at no cost to them and guess what? That's pretty much it.  Really, not bad!  

I am SO not complaining!  My house is paid for!  I got to do all of those amazing things!  We also got to feel such a swell of support for us on the journey to win and that will always be a treasure.  But, we are a family of 7 living on one teacher's salary now.  If I don't sub, we don't make enough to pay our bills.  And yet, I get a distinct feeling that certain folks (interestingly some of the ones that haven't welcomed my volunteer program into some schools either) don't have me sub because they don't think we have a need.  I might be wrong, but my sense is that that is pretty accurate.  

It really doesn't matter so much.  I am getting used to people perceiving me as different than I am.  If anything (though I have struggled, painfully, with it so much over the past year and a half), it has strengthened my own understanding of myself- including my massive weaknesses (one of which is wanting everyone to like me).  

Life is GOOD.  We are super blessed, but we are NOT made for life.  Not with 7 people in a family with 5 growing children.  We've had an awesome stroke of good fortune, that was not won easily and I literally drove myself to the brink of insanity to win, but I hope people might be able to see, in reading this, that after 2 years, that we'd really love to be seen as we are. All of us.  That, however, is likely one of the costs we'll always pay, staying in this community.  Viewed as something other than what we are through eyes that see what they imagine, rather than what really is.  Still, glad to have had the good fortune and glad to have learned as much as I have through the experience, but we're back in reality, which is a lovely kind of relief (as long as I get enough sub jobs!).

[amalama]

[amalama]

WE DAY- the good (volunteerism) and the bad (corporate greed)

A few weeks ago I was asked to sub to cover a teacher so she could chaperone a field trip.  I said yes, but administration said no, as covering the cost of a sub was problematic.  I offered to volunteer to teach the class, but that is a union no-go, so I said I’d chaperone instead of the teacher they asked, if they needed me to do so.  I honestly was sort of hoping they wouldn’t, but I loved the reason for the field trip and wanted to be supportive.

It turned out that they needed me.  I found out the travel details, like I had to be at the high school at 4:45 in the morning (oh joy, rapture!) and then, when it was a few days away, I decided to look into it more.  What I suspected might be a dull conference for volunteer-minded kids, looked to be pretty amazing, actually.  It was “We Day,” which was a celebration that kids were invited to attend if they had done some local and some global volunteering.  They had a line up of inspirational speakers (like an amazing man that had no legs, not Lieutenant Dan, that climbed Mt. Kilimanjaro on his hands), some famous names like Pete Carroll, the coach of the Seahawks, Martin Sheen, some teeny-bopper people like the cast from Degrassi, Magic Johnson and more (like MC Hammer, but sadly, no Hammerpants).  Jennifer Hudson performed (uhhhhh- wow!) and they finished with a HUGE surprise- Macklemore graced us with “Thrift Shop” and another song that felt vaguely familiar.  The kids went nut-ball crazy for that and I am not too proud to admit that I may have squealed myself.  I love me some “Thrift Shop.”

All of this was designed as a thank you to the kids giving back and to inspire them to do more.  It was incredibly loud all day, but the kids had a great, great time.  

I, however, being slightly difficult me, had a few concerns.  First, I GET that the corporations that sponsor such an event are entitled to some free advertising.  I really do.  They paid for it.  I surely did not.  Neither did anyone else in attendance.  You couldn’t buy a ticket.  You earned one for volunteering, but... how many times, exactly did Microsoft need to glitz us with their logo and have their name mentioned?  Amway, too?  There were lots of other sponsors (and we were asked to “follow” and “like” oodles of the speakers too), but those 2 were blasted at us again and again.  It was TOO much.  

Also, through my adoption experience, I learned to be skeptical of charities.  A great message is a wonderful thing, but where is the line between charity and profit?  Often times the “non-profit” profits a great deal.  Before giving to anyone I like to know what percentage goes where.  When I am told about a wonderful program that employs African women as artisans and gives them a lift up out of poverty and then I see “50% of the profits” go to help the women in the program I instantly think- ahhhhhh, profits.  So that means AFTER the materials and production costs are covered (as defined by the charity, too), then half of what is leftover goes to the women.  Where does the other half go?  What does it mean to help the women?  Is this purely wage for them?  Are they saying it is a living wage (like the average $1 a day that many African nations have as their typical earnings?).

It isn’t that I don’t support the message.  I DO!  Kids giving back and making a difference is wonderful!!!  I just wish there hadn’t been so much advertising and I wish I felt more confident on how “charitable” dollars associated with “Me to We” were spent.  In all fairness, I have not researched them thoroughly, but I have poked around a bit and I am interested to know more because, frankly, where there is a lot of glitz and shiny brochures, there is often a disconcerting percentage.  I want as much of my dollars that I give to go to the people they are supposed to be helping as possible. Got more research to do!

[amalama]

Simple Joys and Renewal

Been feeling mighty good.  Clear-headed, productive, peaceful, appreciative, open and present.  

Things of particular note:

The more people I get to know, the more rare I realize the depth of my relationships are.  My natural intensity means that those that I attract (and keep, as many find me to be akin to looking directly at the sun after a time) are thinkers, philosophers, lovers of the human experience, and they tend to be brave in their being.  They are not the type afraid of growth.  I am really glad for that and not at all sorry that I am not everyone’s type.  Those that love me understand that I am very interested in whatever I am doing, but that I flit and float between fascinations.  If I am shining on you brightly, it will be for a bit and then we’ll both be doing other things.  Later, we will connect again (exception to this being my 2 best friends in the world that I talk to at least weekly, usually more). Those that have stuck with me have given me the GREATEST friendships.  I am so thankful and know I have way more quality people in my life than most.  I am blessed! 

Springtime is medicinal.  Last year I began hiking Jacobson Preserve regularly.  At least weekly.  It is a 5 minute jaunt from my house.  Great exercise, incredible view, and the weekly changes in the wildflowers delight me.  One of my children loves to go with me and he spots the new wildflowers.  He is much more observant than I am and he thrills in getting to show them off to me.  He went with my husband and I recently and sure enough, his reputation remains intact.  He found the first buttercup. It is so important, these little things.  It is so hard for him to engage with people meaningfully.  These little wildflowers mean much to me simply through their existence, but they mean more because they allow my boy to connect with his parents.  I’ve been up there 4 times in the last week.  So thankful for the sun, the green hills, the flowers, the view of the river and for my boy.

I love my home. Since I moved into this house with my beautiful family I’ve come a long way in allowing myself to appreciate the wondrous place I live.  The truth is that I felt too guilt to soak in the jacuzzi tub (not anymore- I’m in there 1-2 times per week), too spoiled to sit outside looking at my mature, well-groomed landscaping (I could only plan the work I needed to do to produce my vegetable garden to save money), etc.  Silly, I know, but I grew up with money and it was such an unhappy place that I had some sort of block with money.  Having money makes me uncomfortable.  I feel better now that we’re even- money set aside for the kids, house purchased, etc.  I somehow, now, can appreciate my home in a way I couldn’t before.  I love that tub.  I love the yard (even filled to the brim with dog crap my oldest son is supposed to pick up).  I love the dance studio.  I love the blue smurf stains by the door from an unfortunate paint incident.  Mostly I love that I am allowing myself to accept this gift.  The home I dreamed of having to raise my 5 kids in. Every time I go in the laundry room I see those marks showing how much each of them has grown in the year and a half we’ve been here and I know they’ll go on like that until they're grown.  That is beautiful, especially when 3 of our kids had NO stability in their childhoods before they came to us.

I have been dancing in the streets happy lately as it seems like some long, deep-rooted bad mojo has been working itself out for one of our adopted kiddos and my GOD than is glorious.  The relief of hope has done more for me than I can verbalize.  I haven’t felt hopeful for a long time and I didn’t even realize how crushing that was to my soul and my motivation, though I can certainly see some ways that, along with other factors, manifested in my life over the past year in forms of escapism (not good).  So blessed to look at this child and think happiness may very well be possible in adulthood... 

In general, I am just really glad for simplicity these days.  I am a passionate soul and so I get swept up into things sometimes, but lately, I have been trying to think and sit before I act.  I have been trying to be sure of what my goal is in doing anything.  I can get carried away just in the name of fun even, so I am just deciding to give things time before I get into them.  I am being present in the things I am doing as much as possible- time with the kids, time with my husband, reading, taking a bath, journaling a blog post that probably nobody will read but me, eating a creme egg and hiking that bitch off later.  Whatever I am doing, I really want to do that thing and not be thinking about what I am doing next or attempting to multi-task.  

So, thar she blows.  I am quite content to be at the point of accepting being and blooming over constantly struggling.  It is a lovely life to live and it is mine.  Circumstances vary, but my countenance through all of it is my choosing.  

[amalama]

Technological Snobbery Bunches my Panties

I am sick of technology snobbery. 

  Somehow people who like Twitter think they’re better off than those that use Facebook.  Facebook users like the personal connection better than Twitter.  Bloggers think they’re medium is the least time-wasting.  How about we start accepting that different people prefer different things and it really doesn’t matter what one you prefer.  Yours isn’t better, just different.  You like yours and they like theirs.  Why must anyone place a value judgment on the preferences of people?

  We ALL waste time in different ways.  It used to be thought that spending too much time reading was a waste of a life.  If I could insert, rectally, the loveliness of Tolstoy or George Orwell into the mentality of the masses… If I could make every human being read Eric Hoffer- oh!  How right the world would be, but the truth is that those things speak TO ME.  Others like movies with subtitles (please, just drown me in a pool of battery acid!), but think they’re far more cultured than I am with my repeated viewings of Dumb and Dumber. 

  How about we all just agree that BALANCE is the right choice, no matter what your drug of choice is (including video games, tv, knitting, sticking your thumb up your butt).  We ALL should be living real life, not just mindlessly indulging our time-wasters.  Your life isn’t superior to that of others because you pick one technological poison over another.   

[amalama]

Bathroom Humor

Greatest thing for a male to say upon returning from the restroom: Phew!  It was touch and go there for a while.

[amalama]

Thoughts on Vengeance

Revenge, and the desire for vengeance, is glorified in our society.  Our movie heroes often show a wrong being made right.  Justice, it is sometimes called.  Justice.  If I am wronged, the person that wronged me must pay so we’re even.  We relish seeing that in action.  We cheer for it.  Vindication!

Suing. Courts. Being cruel to someone in words or actions.  All because you are justified.  So what if you are?  

I’ve been justified in exacting revenge.  Sure have.  I am justified in seeking retribution for a thousand wrongs done to me when I was growing up.  Wrongs that were never apologized for, wrongs that, when the details are revealed, are horrific.  The truth is that there aren’t too many people that can even hear them at all.  I only feel moved to share them from time to time- those fabulous details of my formative history.  The people I love the best seem to have a similar reaction- anger and saying something along the lines of “My God, I don’t know how you aren’t crazy!”  Agreed on that sentiment.  We’re all f-ed up in some ways and all things considered, I am significantly better adjusted than I should be.

I recently told a fairly new friend (a beautiful, honest soul that I trust in a way that is uncommon to anyone not in my fold for 20 years or so) some of this delightful past of mine and she was outraged.  She thought I must have desired, out of wrath, retribution for those terrible, terrible things.  She, because she cared about me and truly heard without being scared to hear (I can count on one hand how many have done that), gave me a lot of credit for being who I am despite my early years.  She was protective and validating of the woman I am today.  Bless her love.

The thing is though, I truly do not desire revenge.  Not at all.  I am entitled, but I don’t want it.  I don’t want it with anyone.  If you’ve wronged me, I do not have to allow it to make me cold. I do not have to be unkind in return.  If someone treats me badly, I believe that it has nothing to do with me, much of the time.  

In saying that, I also do not condone mistreatment.  I will speak what I feel I need to express, which will be shaped by my perceptions, of course, but I can move on from it and quickly.  I can see you and know that your injury to me is only an injury if I allow it to be.  That being said, forgiveness does not mean welcoming someone that does not see you with appreciation into your life to disrespect you or damage you again.  It just means that you are free from hate and pain.  How could any of that be good for our souls?  How does it serve us to hold grudges, to want to get back at someone, to feel venomous impulses?

“Reject your sense of injury and the injury itself disappears.”

― Marcus Aurelius

[amalama]

I AM Jillian Michaels

I kicked my OWN butt at DeMass Class tonight. Seriously- why am I such a Jillian Michaels?  ...except not as pretty, famous, rich or toned, of course. I also don't cry when people lose a few pounds for dramatic effect (I can do that, however, should you need the motivation- just let me know).

[amalama]

Things That Bunch my Panties...

Khakis.  I’ve never tried a pair on that didn’t make me feel like I worked at Target.  Pleated khakis have no place in the world, whatsoever.  If you own a pair, I hope you only wear them when you want your ass kicked.

If you’ve known me for any length of time, you likely already know this... the subject comes up fairly often, actually. The Charmin Bears and their damned “pieces left behind” biz.  I have long boycotted their tp based solely on my offense at their advertising.  If anyone ever suggests that I need to pass inspection or that I should be inspecting my kids’ asses for leftover bits of toilet paper, I think I may lose my sh*t.  Maybe that is Charmin’s goal with that campaign.  Sh*t= need for tp.  Clever bastards, except that they’ve alienated my purchasing dollar forever with this ad campaign of theirs.

Vampire anything.  Also, zombies, unless it is The Walking Dead and then they’re ok.  

The smell of hot piss after eating Honey Smacks cereal.  

“U” and “2” instead of the actual words “you” and “to.” Are we really that inconvenienced by using a couple more letters in words that are already only 2-3 letters long?

Men being allowed to go topless while women can’t.  Seriously.  There are a lot of guys out there will MUCH larger breasts than me.  Some are downright voluptuous.  Most likely a little hairier than I am, but still.  Why is it socially acceptable for them to pick between shirts and skins?  I want to be able to at least entertain the thought of choosing skins!

TV shows that show characters using a great strategy for fighting zombies in one episode and then seem to forget how well it worked and try something else in the next episode.  Baby, bathwater and all.  I also hate how TV shows seem to feel they must explain everything to us because we simply don’t seem to be able to make any connections on our own.  Do they think we’re lazy, stupid or both?  Prolly (see my hypocritical use of "prolly" instead of "probably" after my previous shortened word speech) the latter.  Spoon feed me my entertainment!!!  Personally, I like mine rectally. Things are less dully obvious when you can’t see it coming right towards your face.

Going from the eager anticipation of a delicious tuna fish sandwich to the vile repulsion of being slipped a Miracle Whip mickey.  Bad mojo.

  That's it for today.