alynicoleee

[alynicoleee]

Beginning of Forever: Chapter Thirty

Title: Beginning of Forever (Chapter 30) Pairing: Tim Lincecum / OFC POV: Third Person - Tim Lincecum Rating: R

Tim wanted to do something special for Alyssa on Valentine's Day but he wasn't sure what. She had mentioned that she hated the holiday - not because she had always spent it alone, but because she said it felt like an obligation holiday. It was partly the reason why she had chosen to work the night shift that day.

Tim knew how she felt but he couldn't help but show up at her door with flowers. She always messaged him when she got out of late night shifts so as soon as he received the message he headed to her house.

When she arrived it was well past midnight, technically no longer Valentine's Day, and Tim was waiting all smiles.

Alyssa laughed when she saw him, "Tim. You didn't have to do anything."

Tim enveloped her in a hug and whispered in her ear, "I wanted to. And if it helps - it's technically not Valentine's Day anymore."

Alyssa laughed, looking down to the flowers now in her hands, and then looking towards her house before looking back at Tim. "Can I stay with you tonight?"

Tim frowned slightly, not because he didn't want her to, but because that wasn't his intention, "That's not why I came here tonight."

Tim could see the hurt in her eyes as she moved her gaze to the ground and continued, "I would love it if you came over, but you don't have to."

He hated how she always tried to hide when she was uncomfortable. He lifted her chin up so she was looking at him, "Babe".

Alyssa gave him a weak smile and responded, "I get it. But now that you're here, I'd rather not be alone tonight."

Tim gave her a quick peck and motioned toward her house, "Go get your stuff".

Alyssa smiled wide as she shook her head, "Can I borrow a shirt?"

Tim laughed and he led her to his car. The last shirt that she had borrowed was still in her possession, but he didn't mind one bit.

The car ride to his place was quiet, when he glanced over at Alyssa she was staring out the window. He reached out and grabbed her hand, intertwining it with his, as she turned to look at him and smile.

When they got to his home Alyssa seemed to linger by the door for some time. Tim leaned against the wall, waiting for her to move or say something but she didn't so he broke the silence, "What's wrong".

Alyssa shrugged, looking down at her flowers, "Do you have a vase to put these in?"

Tim could tell she was avoiding the question but decided to wait before calling her out on it, "Ummm, not really. But I have a tall glass we can put them in."

Alyssa nodded and followed Tim to the kitchen as he took out the glass from the cupboard. He watched her as she set up the flowers on the counter, the silence surrounding them obvious.

She turned to look at him and softly spoke, "Do you mind if I take a shower?"

Tim shook his head, "Of course not. I'll get you some towels and a shirt."

Alyssa smiled weakly as Tim got everything for her and then disappeared into the bathroom. Tim stayed in the kitchen, he wasn't going to follow her. He took a beer from the fridge and opened it, he wasn't sure what was going on right now. Alyssa seemed off, but he couldn't figure out why. She had been happy to see him at first, but then she became rather quiet and dejected.

Alyssa came out of the shower like a different person. She skipped into the kitchen, dressed in his shirt, with a smile on her face. Tim felt relieved to find her smiling. He had been sitting on one of the bar stools and she walked up and wrapped her arms around his neck from behind.

"You okay baby".

Alyssa gave him a kiss on the cheek before responding, "Yep".

Tim spun the stool around to face her and kissed her softly, "Want to relax on the couch?"

Alyssa gave him a playful smile before responding, "I'd rather relax in bed with you."

Tim shook his head smiling, "I told you that's not why I came to see you."

"I know. And I'm not saying anything has to happen, although I wouldn't be against it, but I really just want to cuddle."

Tim got up, took her hand in his and led her to bedroom, "I think cuddling will be just fine."

Alyssa dragged him into bed and Tim wrapped her up in his arms. They stayed quiet for a while, Alyssa snuggling in his chest, Tim's head resting against hers, until Tim spoke, "You want to tell me what was wrong earlier?"

Alyssa leaned into him, as if she was trying to bury herself in his chest, as she spoke, "I don't know. I'm used to being alone and when I saw you outside my door, with the flowers, I just, I don't know."

Tim kissed the crown of her head and squeezed her tighter as she continued, "I know I said I hated Valentine's Day, and that's still true - but I just all of a sudden really didn't want to be alone."

Tim stroked her back as he spoke, "I'm sorry. I just wanted to make you feel special, even if you didn't care for Valentine's Day."

Alyssa suddenly broke out of Tim's embrace, shaking her head, "No Tim, No. I love that you were there. It isn't a bad thing, I promise."

Tim kissed Alyssa on the forehead and pulled her back into his chest, "Why don't we just call it a night for right now."

They got comfortable, Tim removing his jeans and staying in his shirt and boxes, while Alyssa stayed in his shirt, and Tim pulled up the covers around them and turned off the lights. Tomorrow would be another day.

[alynicoleee]

Beginning of Forever: Chapter Twenty Nine

Title: Beginning of Forever (Chapter 29) Pairing: Tim Lincecum / OFC POV: Third Person - OFC Rating: R

Alyssa walked into her home a little past 10pm. The house was quiet and she was glad. She was not in the mood to have her mom ruin the great 24 hours she had just had.

She softly closed her bedroom door behind her and collapsed on her bed. She couldn't wipe the smile off her face if she tried. Even the awkward conversation with Tim made her happy.

She was still in Tim's t-shirt. It was so comfortable and it smelled like him - she never wanted to take it off.

Alyssa had been scared that her limited experience with men would scare Tim off, but it didn't. He seemed completely okay with doing things at her pace, he never pressured her and made sure she was fine first. It was a sweet change from what she usually encountered - men who no longer wanted to deal with her because of her limited experience, or men who wanted to prove they could give her everything that she was missing. The latter usually making her feel extremely uncomfortable and leading to her calling it quits before anything occurred. The endless loop seemed to keep her stuck where she was.

But now - now seemed to be her chance to experience everything with someone that she cared about and who cared about her in return.

Her phone beeped with an incoming text message from Tim, "I don't think I ever said it last night but Happy New Year. Goodnight baby."

Alyssa grinned as she replied, "Happy New Year baby. Here's to a great year ahead. Goodnight".

She fell asleep that night with a smile on her face and her heart happy.

The remainder of the month seemed to move at a turtle's pace. Alyssa's work schedule was erratic to start the year, leaving limited time to spend with Tim.

Although they spoke every day, including video calls, their physical time spent together had dwindled down to a day or two a week. Tim had met two more of Alyssa's friends during this time - Edith and Theresa - though Alyssa said they were more acquaintances than friends. They had met through work and their similar work schedules had transitioned to a few shared outings ourself of work. Alyssa and Tim got their time alone together when they could and Tim never pressured her for more.

They were finally set to have an almost full day together but Alyssa had to stop at the dentist early. She had genetically inherited bad teeth - her tooth enamel was genetically weak and no matter how many treatments she received she found her teeth chipping or cracking for almost no reason. This morning she had gone in for a root canal on a tooth that had an abscess stubborn enough that after two rounds of antibiotics her dentist had told her she needed to have the procedure done immediately.

Thanks to the novocaine the procedure itself was painless - but by the time she arrived to Tim's place to start their day together her tooth was throbbing.

When Tim opened the door he took one look at her and ushered her onto the couch even though she was shaking her head, "No Tim. We're supposed to go out, spend the day together." She tried to argue with Tim but he wouldn't budge.

"And we can still spend the day together, but baby, I'm sorry to say but you don't look very good."

Alyssa didn't even have any energy to argue. She gave up and allowed herself to be smothered by Tim. He gave her some pain killers and snuggled up with her on the couch. The apartment was quiet, the TV wasn't even on, and they sat there comfortably as Alyssa stayed tucked in his chest and Tim kept brushing her hair back softly.

She didn't know how long they had sat there together, or when she had fallen asleep, but when she opened her eyes again she was now cuddled up in Tim's arms, his big spoon to her little spoon, in his bed. She pulled his arms tighter around her - the throbbing pain in her tooth remained. She felt him nuzzle his head against her and whisper in her ear, "It sucks. I know. But the pain will go away soon. I googled it - in 48 hours you'll feel better."

Alyssa turned around to face Tim, not wanting to break the embrace. She looked up into his eyes and whispered back to him, "I'm sorry. I ruined our day."

Tim pulled her in closer and kissed the top of her head, "Don't be sorry. You didn't ruin anything."

They spent the remainder of the day cuddled up together in his bed, with Tim giving her pain medicine every four hours and feeding her soup so as not to aggravate the pain.

By the time the day was over Alyssa was feeling much better. The pain had lightened up and it was a manageable pressure now. Tim walked her to her car, kissing her softly before letting her go.

Alyssa smiled and thanked him for everything he had done for her. She was still bummed that their plans had been ruined, but the day had still turned out pretty well - any day spent with Tim was a good day.

[alynicoleee]

Beginning of Forever: Chapter Twenty Eight

Title: Beginning of Forever (Chapter 28) Pairing: Tim Lincecum / OFC POV: Third Person - Tim Lincecum Rating: R

Tim smiled as Alyssa walked around his living room in one of his t-shirts, taking the empty food containers to the trash before she settled on the couch. They had ordered delivery and were watching a movie on TV, snuggled up on the couch.

The day was almost over and Tim knew he had to get Alyssa back to her home soon. But he wanted a chance to talk to her first.

Tim stroked Alyssa's hair as he spoke, "You know this wasn't my intention right."

Alyssa pulled back and feigned a shocked expression, "You mean your plan wasn't to get me semi drunk and seduce me into sleeping with you."

Tim burst out laughing. He knew she was joking. "Come on babe. Seriously though."

Alyssa smiled, "Tim. I'm okay. I'm not naive enough to think that I would spend the night here and nothing would happen. And honestly, I wanted it to."

For a minute they stayed quiet, until Alyssa finally spoke - "Does this change anything?"

Tim's mind raced and he spoke without thinking, "Yes. No."

"It's okay Tim." Alyssa tried to get off the couch put Tim pulled her back.

"Wait. It does change things. But not in the way you think." Tim paused for a minute and closed his eyes. The truth was he didn't know what to say. He hadn't been intimate with anyone since Cristin. But he didn't regret anything that had happened. Quite the opposite actually. He felt this sense of warmness inside - like everything was right.

He felt Alyssa's soft hand on his face and he opened his eyes to look at her. Her face was full of worry and concern, so he just spoke. "I haven't been with anyone since Cristin. But last night, this morning - was one of the best feelings I've ever felt. I can't hide the feelings there and I don't want to. So does it change things - yes. Makes everything deeper, more intimate. Makes the connection I feel for you stronger. But at the same time it doesn't change anything. We're still the same two people we were 48 hours ago on the same relationship path; taking it one day at a time."

Alyssa smiled and settled into his arms again, "It changes things. And I don't know about you, but I'm scared. But I'm scared because all these feelings are so new to me. And they're not new to you. You've had all this before."

Tim hugged her tighter, "Just because they're not new to me doesn't mean it's not special to me. It's extra special to me. And it's extra special knowing I get to be the reason you're feeling all those feelings. That's why I keep asking if you're okay. I know you're scared. I can sense it. And I want take that fear away from you."

Being with Alyssa sometimes transported Tim back to when he was younger and discovering love for the first time. It was a wonder to him how Alyssa hadn't given up on love altogether after how poorly love had treated her. She should never be someone's afterthought. She definitely wasn't to him.

Tim kissed her forehead and continued, "Please don't think that our relationship now revolves around sex, because it doesn't. I'm taking this at your speed, with what you're comfortable with."

Alyssa turned around and kissed him but said nothing. They stayed quiet for the remainder of the movie, content in each other's arms, until Tim took her home.

[alynicoleee]

Beginning of Forever: Chapter Twenty Seven

Title: Beginning of Forever (Chapter 27) Pairing: Tim Lincecum / OFC POV: Third Person - OFC Rating: NC-17

Alyssa woke up in the same position that they had drifted to sleep in, tangled in each other's arms. The sunlight was slowly slipping through the curtain and filling Tim's bedroom. Alyssa didn't know what time it was - the amazing night had spilled over into an even more amazing morning. She didn't want to move, didn't want the day to ever end.

There was an impossible sweetness in the moment, something she had never experienced before. Alyssa couldn't explain the feeling, but it was such a great feeling, such a strange high. She couldn't believe how many times Tim had made her cum without having to use a toy or her own fingers to get her off. The intense pull she felt toward him was magical; she felt safe with him.

She turned over softly, not wanting to wake him, and just stared at his features for a long time. He looked so peaceful when he slept. His face was soft and relaxed, a glow radiating from his skin. She smiled as she continued watching him sleep. She was in the midst of reliving the experience in her mind and thinking how lucky she was when his eyes fluttered open.

She smiled as Tim's eyes adjusted from sleep and he noticed her staring at him.

"Hi," he whispered.

She ran her hand down his cheek as she responded, "Hi."

He leaned in to kiss her and she giggled, she could definitely get used to this.

Tim pulled back and smiled, "Are you okay?"

Alyssa scrunched up her nose before replying, "I am. But I'm curious why you keep asking me?"

She could tell that the question caught Tim off guard and he remained silent for a few seconds before responding, "I guess I just don't want to hurt you, physically, emotionally, whatever. Every time I learn a little more about you, I want to protect you even more. I want you to be okay. So I'm going to keep asking you, over and over again. Is that okay?"

Alyssa smiled wide as she snuggled into his chest and Tim's arms gripped her tighter, "Can I tell you a secret?"

Tim leaned into her as he responded, "You can tell me anything and everything."

She paused for a moment wondering if it was too soon to say it - their relationship was still so new, barely over a month, and she didn't want to scare him away. But something inside of her told her to just say it, "I feel really fucken safe with you. I don't have to pretend with you. I can let down my guard around you, be vulnerable, and not feel like you're going to judge me. You make me feel safe."

Tim pulled back and then leaned and gave Alyssa the most passionate kiss that let her know that it wasn't too soon to say it. She could feel her eyes water with emotion and when he pulled away a tear trickled down her face.

He wiped the tear from her eye as he spoke, "You have no idea how much hearing that means to me. This relationship seems to be moving at the speed of light, and some times it scares me, but I wouldn't change a single thing. And knowing that you feel safe with me just makes me believe how right this really is."

Alyssa couldn't help it, the tears spilled over as Tim spoke. She was happy, for once she was truly happy. She snuggled up close to him and they just snuggled in silence for a moment until Tim spoke.

"Want to take a shower? We're a sticky mess."

Alyssa nodded, and as Tim helped her out of bed she flinched lightly. She was sore, but a good sore. She was clinching the bed sheet around her as if Tim hadn't already explored every single crevice of her body but he didn't say anything, just smiled.

She stood in the doorway of the bathroom and watched as Tim pulled out extra towels out of the closet for her and turned on the shower head. As the water fell he turned around and smirked, "You have to let go of the sheet at some point."

Alyssa could feel her face heating up, she had never been comfortable in her own skin. He reached out his hand to her and she shyly took it, letting the sheet fall to the ground. He led her into the shower and she could feel her body relax the minute the hot water hit her skin. As the water fall over her, Tim wrapped his arms around her waist and whispered in her ear, "What are you thinking about?"

She turned around to face him and wrapped her arms around his neck, "You're so patient with me."

He leaned in and gave her a soft peck before responding, "Why wouldn't I be? There's no hurry here, there's no pressure. There's nothing wrong with being nervous, feeling uneasy or confused. It's just you and me, navigating this together - adjusting to each other's needs and wants. We figure it out together."

Alyssa smiled as she spoke, "So wise."

Tim shrugged, "Therapy does that for you."

Alyssa cracked up laughing and jokingly pushed him away. He pulled her back in and kissed the top of her head, "That was a good one though".

They kept their shower sweet but sensual, washing up and down each other's bodies and trailing kisses throughout. But that's as far as Tim allowed it to go, telling her that he didn't want her to think that she owed him anything.

Alyssa was surprised and semi confused. This was the first time that a man didn't demand more of her, the first time a man took their time to pleasure her, thought about her first, and put his needs last. She didn't think such men existed, all the ones she encountered always wanted something from her and were upset when it didn't happen or if the night was cut short.

It was the best feeling to be understood and listened to even without ever saying a word. The best feeling to have her feelings strongly considered alongside his.

Tim wrapped her up in a towel and Alyssa hugged herself tight. He carried her and sat her at the edge of the sink, eliminating their height difference. Alyssa pulled her hair back and stared straight into Tim's green eyes smiling. She could look into his eyes for hours.

He pressed his forehead against hers and whispered, "I'm going to ask you again, are you okay?"

Alyssa giggled. Now that she knew he asked because he really cared she didn't mind it as much. "Just on thing. Can I borrow a shirt?"

Tim laughed before kissing her, "Anything you want".

[alynicoleee]

Beginning of Forever: Chapter Twenty Six

Title: Beginning of Forever (Chapter 26) Pairing: Tim Lincecum / OFC POV: Third Person - Tim Lincecum Rating: NC-17

Tim woke up with Alyssa still snuggled up in his arms. It was a feeling he hadn't experienced in quite a bit, to wake up with the heat of someone you cared about against you. This time around Tim wasn't going to take anything for granted and he closed his eyes to savor the moment.

He felt Alyssa shift in his arms and realized she was awake. He kissed her head softly and she glanced up at him, a sparkle in her hazel eyes that he hadn't seen before.

"Hi," she whispered.

"Hi," he responded. "How are you feeling. You okay?" He wanted to make sure that she was okay with everything that had happened last night. He didn't care how many times he asked the question - if she ever sounded uneasy in her response he would stop immediately. They hadn't been dating very long and he didn't want her to feel like they were rushing into anything.

Alyssa was blushing slightly, "Did that really happen or did I dream it? Because I don't know weather to feel fantastic or embarrassed."

Tim kissed her softly, "Feel fantastic. Never be embarrassed about anything, especially not with me. But I have to ask, was that really your first orgasm?"

Alyssa tried to hide in his chest but he wouldn't let her. He lifted her chin up and whispered, "Talk to me". He really wanted to know everything about her. He didn't want to overstep or force her out of her comfort zone.

He had to struggle to hear her words, "It was the first orgasm I didn't have to give to myself. Every man I've been with has only cared about themselves."

Tim had a hard time hearing that. This beautiful, shy, sweet and loving woman had never been taken care of by a man like that.

"Seriously? No one ever cared about your needs before?"

Alyssa shook her head but had no words.

"Well. We're going to change that. Because I'm going to make sure you're always taken care of, as long as you'll let me."

Tim brushed her hair back and began to nibble and kiss down her neck. His hands went down to cup her breasts and he heard her moan softly - it was quickly becoming his favorite sound.

"I want to taste you. Is that okay."

Alyssa's face was bright red, her chest was begin to flush as well but she nodded.

Tim continued touching and kissing her but he still wasn't convinced, "Don't be afraid to say No. It's okay."

"Yes Tim. Yes."

Tim started inching himself down her body until he reached her most sensitive area. He softly spread her legs apart and found that she was already extremely wet. Tim decided not to waste any time.

He licked the sweet juices from her outer lips and slowly inserted his tongue inside her. When he moved to her clitoris Alyssa jerked as if an electric current had hit her. He smiled as he told her to relax, "It's okay. Relax."

He held her legs open and began to apply a concentrated effort on her clit - licking and sucking softly.

Alyssa began to utter soft moans as she began to allow herself to enjoy the moment.

With both hands, Tim cupped her breasts and started playing with her nipples by pulling them lightly and pinching them. He continued licking her clit and Alyssa's movements soon became uncontrollable and she was lost in pleasure. After some time she started jerking violently and her quiet moans became louder until she reached her peak and let go.

Her hot juices flowed out and Tim cleaned her up with his mouth. The sensation was as good for him as it was for her. He felt intense pleasure knowing that he could give her something that no one else had.

When her body had relaxed, Tim positioned himself next to her. She was breathless as she smiled at him and panted, "Wow".

He smiled at her as she blinked a few times and then moved lower down the bed. Tim knew what she was trying to do and grabbed her and pulled her back, "Nope. Let it be about you right now. You don't need to do anything else."

He stroked her cheek and she placed her hand over his and shyly whispered, "Condom?"

Tim smiled and playfully jabbed at her, "Are you asking for sex?"

Alyssa tried to bury herself in his chest and he hugged her tighter and kissed the top of her head. "I don't want you to be uncomfortable baby. Don't be scared to talk to me - about anything - sexual or not."

She pulled back and he looked down to see her eyes glistening. She leaned in, kissed him, and whispered, "I want you inside me. I need that connection."

Tim was more than happy to oblige. He reached over to the nightstand, pulled out a condom and swiftly put it on. With one deep, slow thrust, Tim was in.

Tim settled into a slow and steady rhythm, as slow as he could, in and out.

He kissed her passionately and Alyssa lightly bit his lip and then planted kisses down his neck. He felt her legs wrap around him tightly and he continued his slow thrusts - intent on making the moment last.

When Alyssa came, she came softly with a small hitch in her moan. Tim froze, buried deep inside her, allowing her time for her body to relax again.

Tim starting moving again, small grinding movements, never pulling himself out completely.

Alyssa was quickly becoming more vocal, "Oh, sweet god, that feels so good."

Tim smiled as Alyssa whispered in his ear, "Cum with me".

He didn't need any more encouragement. Alyssa let out a deep moan and Tim collapsed on top of her, unable to hold himself steady any more. They shook together in near silence, trembling as their orgasms crashed over them.

Tim laid on top of her, between her thighs, spent. After a few deep breaths he slowly slid out of her and went to discard the condom.

Tim climbed back in bed and wrapped Alyssa in his arms, getting lost in the warm afterglow. He kissed her neck softly and she reached up and ran her fingers through his hair.

After a long time laying there, tangled together, they dozed off back to sleep.

[alynicoleee]

Beginning of Forever: Chapter Twenty Five

Title: Beginning of Forever (Chapter 25) Pairing: Tim Lincecum / OFC POV: Third Person - OFC Rating: NC-17

The clock struck midnight and Tim leaned in and kissed Alyssa passionately. Alyssa didn't want it to ever end. This was the first time in her life that she wasn't alone for New Years and that she had someone to share a midnight kiss with. She was on cloud nine and never wanted to come down.

After a few more hours dancing and drinking they decided to call it a night. They called an uber and cuddled up in the backseat as the uber took them back to Tim's house. Alyssa and Tim had decided she would stay over to avoid being out on the street and in traffic longer than they had to be - they didn't want to have to make multiple stops and Tim's house made the most sense since it was closer to their destination and he lived alone.

They walked in and Alyssa kicked off her heels and collapsed on the couch. She was exhausted and if she was honest - slightly drunk. Tim approached with a water bottle and she happily took a big gulp before placing the bottle on the floor next to the couch and looking up at Tim and whispering, "Best Night Ever".

Tim straddled her on the couch and leaned in to kiss her. The kiss was intense and their hands began to wander and travel down each other's bodies. Tim pulled back breathlessly and Alyssa just smiled as she struggled to open her eyes. Even now she was worried that she would open her eyes one day and everything would be gone - that she was living a dream and she would one day just wake up.

Tim stopped, "Are you okay?"

Alyssa smiled wider, "With you, always."

Tim leaned in and they continued their kissing and teasing. When he pulled back he whispered softly in her ear, "Bedroom?".

Alyssa was getting goosebumps and between her heavy breathing realized that Tim was waiting for a response so she nodded. He led her down the hall and into his bedroom, before she could say anything Tim turned her round and began to slowly massage her shoulders and trace her neck with kisses. He slowly pulled the zipper of her dress down as he continued marking her with kisses.

Alyssa was slowly melting inside. She was in a haze but was trying to commit every single touch and kiss to memory to hold it forever. The straps of her dress fell off her shoulders and she shook herself out of it, allowing it to pool at her feet. She stepped out of it and turned around to face Tim and was met with the hunger in his eyes. She would usually feel self conscious at this moment - standing there in just a bra and panty but she didn't. She moved towards Tim and began to fumble with the buttons on his shirt. He could sense her struggle and helped her take it off before leaning in to kiss her again.

As their kiss intensified Alyssa's hands moved down to undo his belt to pull his pants down. He stepped out of them and they were soon both just in their underwear. Tim's mouth was instantly on Alyssa's neck, sucking right where it seemed her heart beat the wildest. He slowly moved them toward the bed, discarding their remaining items of clothing along the way. He softly laid her down on the bed and climbed over her, locking eyes.

"Hi," he smiled.

Alyssa smiled back wide, "Hi."

"You okay?" Alyssa could sense that Tim wasn't going to continue until he knew for certain that this was what she wanted. And she wanted it badly.

"I'm perfect Tim. Go."

Tim's hands and mouth moved all over her body and he whispered, "So soft", and Alyssa felt herself melting in pleasure.

Tim's hand slid down to where Alyssa was wet and he let out a low curse, "Fuck". She felt his thumb slide over her clit and she jumped in pleasure off the bed. Tim smiled as he inserted two fingers inside of her, causing her to grip the bedsheets. He came up to kiss her, his tongue teasing in time with his fingers, and Alyssa felt like she was drugged up on love. The sensation was incredible and Alyssa's hands reached down to return the favor; she wrapped her hand around his cock, stroking up and down. Tim pulled back from the kiss and Alyssa could see his nostrils flaring. She took it as a sign that he was enjoying this too.

They continued in time, Tim's fingers, Alyssa's fist, and they both found it hard to stop. Tim went down to Alyssa's breast and began to kiss, suck and nibble on them while continuing to work his fingers. The sensation was too much and Alyssa found herself begging him to stop.

"Oh my god. Tim. Tim. Stop. Please. Stop. "

Tim stopped instantly but didn't remove his fingers, "Does it hurt?"

Alyssa was breathless but managed to respond, "No. Intense."

"So if it doesn't hurt, let me take care of you." Tim waited for her to nod in agreement before whispering, "Let go." He sped up once more, thrusting his fingers in and out and working his thumb over her clit. When Tim whispered in her ear that he could feel her coming, she lost control completely and let out a relieved cry. Tim slowed down but didn't remove his finger's until she came down from her pleasure high.

Alyssa's body was shaking. She had never experienced something like that before, usually she had to get herself over the edge, and having someone else get her over the edge was a completely different feeling. When she felt her world slow down again she opened her eyes to stare into Tim's green eyes.

"You okay," he asked.

Alyssa felt the warmth in his voice and melted. This entire night he'd put her first - made sure she was fine. She reached up and ran her palm lovingly down his cheek.

"Yes, amazing. But I need you," she never would have admitted that before to anyone, but this wasn't just sex. She felt a connection she couldn't explain and she desperately needed to feel him inside her.

Tim kissed her once more before climbing out of bed, "Let me get something."

Alyssa could hear the tearing of a foil, and she was relieved, he had a condom ready even though they hadn't discussed it.

Tim positioned himself at her entrance, but only the tip of him going in and out.

"Please," Alyssa moaned underneath him.

After a few more soft strokes Tim pushed forward, going deep, causing Alyssa to lift her hips up. It was a slow grind that quickly became frantic. Tim leaned forward and their kiss became hot and messy, with Tim sucking at her mouth, her chin and biting slightly on her lip. They moved in unison and Alyssa came again as she heard Tim's breathing turn into grunts and moans and his whispers of "So good" in her ear. She felt him shove deep and come with a sharp cry.

They collapsed intertwined in each other, paralyzed and sweaty. Tim weaved their fingers together and before Alyssa even realized it, she fell asleep in his arms, blissful and happy.

[alynicoleee]

Beginning of Forever: Chapter Twenty Four

Title: Beginning of Forever (Chapter 24) Pairing: Tim Lincecum / OFC POV: Third Person - Tim Lincecum Rating: PG-13

Christmas had been better than Tim had anticipated. He enjoyed his friends company leading up to the day itself, and was more than thrilled to spend the holiday with Alyssa. Brunch had been a success and his friends raved about Alyssa, they could see that she was having a good effect on him. After his friends had all gone home, he got a chance to spend the remainder of the day with Alyssa.

They didn't need any fancy dinner or outfits. He was perfectly content to sit with her on the couch, in their pajamas, snuggled up under a blanket as the TV played in the background.

Tim had confessed to Alyssa that she made him smile more than anyone had in a while. She was giving him back his smile. She had mentioned that his presence meant a lot to her but she wouldn't elaborate on it. He tried to ask her about but was greeted with tear filled eyes and decided not to pursue it. He wiped a tear away from her eyes and squeezed her tighter, he didn't need to know right now.

They sat there quietly just taking in each other and soon Tim realized that Alyssa had fallen asleep. He didn't blame her - she had been working the last few days and then came over early and cooked everything for brunch and even decorated his place. He carried her gently to his bedroom and laid her down on the bed, he covered her up with the comforter and closed the door to allow her to sleep in peace.

He looked around the apartment at all the things that Alyssa had done to brighten it up and he could really see this being home. It was feeling like home, she was feeling like home. It scared him only slightly, everything was moving fast. He had called his dad last night and he kept thinking about everything his dad said about time - our perception of time was subjective. And time was also fleeting. Tim knew that, better than most did. So he had decided he wouldn't let time dictate his relationship, not now. He would let his heart do the dictating, and right now - it was saying to keep going - it didn't matter how long they had known each other, it felt right, it felt good.

Tim looked back towards his bedroom door and smiled, he'd enjoy every minute of it. He headed to the kitchen to clean up everything that he had told Alyssa to leave behind. He was almost done when he heard his bedroom door open and Alyssa walk out clutching the yellow duck from their second date.

"Hi," she whispered.

"Hi," he responded. It seemed to be their own little private thing. A nod back to the very first words they said to each other when they met.

"I can't believe you still have the duck." She squeezed it tight and Tim could see instantly how much it meant to her that he still had it.

"Of course. I wasn't going to get rid of him. Did you have a good nap."

Alyssa walked over to sit on the kitchen barstools, placing the duck on the counter and nodded, "I can't believe I fell asleep. You should have woken me up."

Tim shook his head as he sat down next to her, "No way. You looked like you needed it. And once I tucked you in the bed you looked so peaceful that I wouldn't have had the heart to wake you."

"Thank you."

"No. Thank you. For everything you did today. Do you need to get home? To celebrate with your mom?"

Alyssa shook her head, grabbing the duck from the counter, hugging it to her chest, and looked down, "No. We don't really celebrate the holidays. You wouldn't know it considering the house looks like Christmas threw up inside. But we've always done our own things. Even when I was little. We'd open presents for about thirty minutes and then we all went our separate ways - either out or to our rooms."

Tim bought Alyssa's chin up to look at him. He hated to hear that her holidays were usually spent alone - even back when she was a kid. And yet, you wouldn't know it, she didn't seem bitter about it at all, just sad. "I'm sorry to hear that."

Alyssa just shrugged, "It's okay. It's reality. I'm used to being alone."

Tim stood up and wrapped his arms around her, he understood now what her earlier comment meant, "No. You're not alone. Not anymore." He hugged her tight and kissed her forehead.

Alyssa suddenly broke free and wiped her glistening eyes before exclaiming, "The gingerbread house!!!".

Tim was puzzled and just stared at her.

She got up, leaving the duck on the chair, and walked towards the bags that were still by the door and pulled out a gingerbread house kit. "I got this for the kids and I forgot to build it with them."

Tim walked over and grabbed the box from her grinning, "Good. Now we have something just for us. Come on, let's build it."

The look on Alyssa's face as Tim spoke was priceless. He could immediately see that the small gesture of having a semblance of Christmas just for them meant a lot to her. He was glad.

For the remainder of the night they laughed as they built a very lopsided house that neither one of them planned on eating. They finished off the night cuddled up watching Home Alone.

Tim wouldn't have had it any other way.

[alynicoleee]

Beginning of Forever: Chapter Twenty Three

Title: Beginning of Forever (Chapter 23) Pairing: Tim Lincecum / OFC POV: Third Person - OFC Rating: PG-13

Alyssa woke up early with butterflies in her stomach. It was Christmas Day and she would be meeting Tim's friends and making them Brunch. It had been her idea. Since she worked the night before and couldn't join them for dinner, she wanted to join them today. But she knew Tim wouldn't be up for so many days out in a row - so she had suggested a PJ brunch at his place and he had loved the idea.

She had purchased everything she would need the day before so she woke up early and headed to Tim's.

It was barely 7am when she stood outside his door in her Christmas PJs and Penguin slippers. She stood there knocking for several minutes and decided to call Tim and try to wake him up. When he finally answered his voice was groggy and full of sleep.

"Hello".

"Merry Christmas Tim. Can you let me in?"

"Fuck. I'll be right there"

The line went dead and soon Tim was opening the door, she laughed when she saw him. He was standing there in nothing but his boxers, his hair all over the place. It was clear she had woken him up.

He scratched his head as he looked over at the living room clock, "I thought brunch started at noon."

Alyssa walked right past him, setting down the multiple bags she was carrying. "It does. But you're hosting Christmas Day for two families; you need a little Christmas Spirit in here."

Before she realized it Tim had walked behind her and wrapped her in a hug from behind. The warmness of his body immediately calmed her down. She turned around to face him without breaking the embrace. Her hands on his bare chest as she looked up into his green eyes.

"Merry Christmas".

"Merry Christmas".

They kissed softly for a few minutes before they broke their kiss and Alyssa snuggled in his chest for a few minutes. She could hear his heart beat and she took several breaths to compose herself. She wanted to go climb into bed with him right then and there but she wasn't the woman who ever suggested those things, she always let the man take the lead.

Tim kissed the top of her head and spoke, "Okay. So where do we begin."

Alyssa broke the embrace and plastered a smile on her face, "You can help me figure out where to put all these decorations and make your home a lil more festive."

She had come with tons of knick knacks to place around the apartment, including strings of colorful lights to brighten up the place. Tim hadn't decorated at all for Christmas - he didn't even have a tree - so she thought this would be a nice touch.

By the time they were done it was almost 9am. Alyssa began pulling out the ingredients for lunch while she sent Tim to take a shower and ordered him to put on his Christmas PJs. She simply wouldn't be able to spend the day just staring at his bare chest - the man still had his slim athletic build and she wanted to run her hands all over his muscles.

When he reappeared soon afterwards his long locks were wet and dripping against his face. Luckily he had put on the pjs or Alyssa would have lost it. She was almost done prepping everything - a variety of festive brunch casseroles that just needed to be heated up. Tim looked around admiring her work.

"Baby all of this looks great."

Alyssa beamed, she wasn't sure if it was him calling her baby, or admiring all her hard work, but her heart felt full and happy.

They still had some time before Drew and Sean would arrive with their families so they sat and snuggled on the couch to enjoy some quiet time together.

Before they knew it Tim's place was full - introductions went around and while everyone chatted up Alyssa tried to hide in the background. But Tim wouldn't let her; he kept dragging her out of the kitchen and into the mix of everyone. By early evening everyone had tired out - brunch was a hit and Alyssa had tried her best to blend in with Tim's friend. She knew the kids liked her - but she wasn't sure about the adults.

When everyone was gone Alyssa retreated into the kitchen to clean up but Tim told her to leave it - it wasn't important. He wrapped her in his arms and led her back to the couch. Once they were wrapped under a blanket Alyssa instantly calmed down - Tim was beginning to feel like her safety net. That excited and scared Alyssa but her thoughts were quickly interrupted.

"They liked you."

Alyssa snickered, "You're just saying that. I felt awkward the entire time."

Tim kissed her forehead and continued, "They were expecting that. I threw you into a big family event. Anyone would feel awkward. But they loved the brunch. They're really grateful you did all that for them. Sean and his wife especially loved how you kept interacting with the kids."

Alyssa laughed, "I thought playing with them would be a good distraction for me. And I am a big kid, so it works well."

Tim laughed along with her, "I love that. Drew says he hadn't seen me smile so much lately. I have you to thank for that. You make me smile, more than you even know."

Alyssa cuddled up closer in his chest, the feeling calming her heart, "I love it when you genuinely smile, your face lights up all the way to your eyes. I'm glad I can do that for you because you have no idea how much your presence does to me."

Tim lifted her chin up and she was greeted with curiosity sparkling in his green eyes, "So tell me."

Alyssa smiled and her eyes watered slightly, this feeling was so new to her. For once she didn't feel like a burden to someone, she felt cared for and safe. She didn't know how to put it all into words but it didn't seem like Tim needed to hear them, he wiped at her eye as a tear spilled over and held her tighter. She never wanted him to let go.

[alynicoleee]

Beginning of Forever: Chapter Twenty Two

Title: Beginning of Forever (Chapter 22) Pairing: Tim Lincecum / OFC POV: Third Person - Tim Lincecum Rating: PG-13

Tim couldn't wait until Christmas. Drew and Sean were coming in for the weekend and he couldn't wait to introduce them to Alyssa. He wished his dad was coming too but maybe this would be best, he didn't want to overwhelm her.

He had met her mom and her best friend and while he thought it went fine, Alyssa wasn't as sure. It had been a week since that meeting and Alyssa refused to give him any details about what they said afterwards. "It didn't matter," was all she offered up.

Tim wasn't sure how true that was, but he knew that it was important to him that Drew and Sean met her, and hopefully liked her. They were his best friends and knew all of Tim's darkest secrets. They had been there for the highs as well as the lows and he didn't want to hide her from them.

They arrived Thursday, four days before Christmas, with their families in tow. Both Drew and Sean were married with kids, Sean with three little ones and Drew with one. Alyssa would be working long hours every day until Christmas Day so it was just him with them until then. They were all renting separate spaces since Tim was staying in a one bedroom apartment that wouldn't fit everyone.

On the first day the women and kids went off to explore while Drew and Sean got some time in with their friend. They were sitting around his living room like they had done many times throughout the years, drinking and playing video games.

Drew was the first to notice that Tim wasn't all there.

"Where's your head at buddy?"

Tim shook his head as he looked around the living room. "I don't know. Did I tell you I started going back to therapy?"

Drew took a sip of his beer before he replied, "No. But I think that's great. I'm really happy you decided to go back and get help dealing with everything."

Tim continued staring straight ahead at nothing instead of looking at his two friends, "Thanks. But Alyssa is the one that really deserves that credit. When I got back from Seattle after spending Thanksgiving with my dad we sat down to talk - I was ready you know. But I could see this fear in her eyes. But as she talked I realized the fear in her eyes wasn't about anything that could happen between us but more about my own inner turmoil. Like she was scared for me, about my own feelings."

Tim stopped and Sean joined the conversation, "That's the sign of a women who wants you to take care of yourself first. You know what a risk it is to suggest that - you could have taken it the wrong way and walked away right then and there."

Tim nodded, "She told me that day she wanted me to take care of myself first; even if it meant walking away from her. And I think that was the moment I knew I had to give therapy a good honest shot, because I didn't want to disappoint her or lose her."

Drew walked behind Tim and placed his hand on his shoulder, "I guess that dating profile was a good thing after all huh."

The boys laughed and Tim had to admit that if it wasn't for Drew meddling in on his love live and creating that online profile that he probably would have never met Alyssa. He couldn't thank Drew enough for that.

The boys continued their afternoon together catching up before meeting up with everyone early in the evening. The next few days were filled with activities that Alyssa had suggested for Tim to do with his friends. He was bummed that she couldn't join them but he understood. They'd be spending Christmas Eve apart as well but Alyssa had suggested a Christmas PJ Brunch at his place - she would cook - and he couldn't wait for that.

[alynicoleee]

Beginning of Forever: Chapter Twenty One

Title: Beginning of Forever (Chapter 21) Pairing: Tim Lincecum / OFC POV: Third Person - OFC Pairing: PG-13

For the next few weeks Alyssa woke up with a smile on her face every day. Things with Tim had been going really good. They spoke every day, they saw each other as often as they could, and just as he had promised - he had begun going to therapy. Alyssa was happier for him than she was for herself, she knew his soul needed this and she could tell it was helping too, every time she saw him she could see his green eyes shine a little brighter.

Tim hadn't met any of Alyssa's friends or family and that was by design. Alyssa's circle was small and most of her friend's were actually acquaintances rather than friends. There were few people in her life who she cared to introduce Tim too - because in truth, none of their opinions mattered to her.

Tonight she was going to introduce him to her mother, and then they were off to dinner with her best friend and her boyfriend. She was worried for both events - not because of what either would think, she didn't care - but how Tim would feel. She had tried to brace him for what was coming but he laughed and thought she was being a bit dramatic.

Her doorbell rang at exactly 7:30p, Tim was always very prompt. He had picked her up plenty of times by now but she was usually waiting for him outside to avoid him coming to the door - she knew he wouldn't wait in the car if she asked.

She took a deep breath as she opened the door and led him inside. Her mom was waiting in the living room, the awkward silence that immediately followed already let Alyssa know that her mother did not approve. Tim introduced himself, shook her mom's hands and tried to make small talk. Her mom had a fake smile plastered on her face that only Alyssa could distinguish. It wasn't anything Tim said - frankly it was just her mother's old school latin ways - if they weren't from the same culture as she was, they never met her standards. Tim wasn't hispanic, he had a Filipino and American background, and he didn't speak a word of Spanish - to her mother, those were all negatives. His long hair, which Alyssa loved, was also something her old school mother would frown about.

After about 10 minutes Alyssa interrupted their awkward small talk, explaining they had to leave to meet her best friend. All the way to the car all Alyssa could do was apologize. He opened the door for her and she slid in the passenger seat as she continued to apologize. He got in next to her and interrupted her with a kiss.

"Relax, it really wasn't all that bad." Tim smiled as he backed the car out of the driveway.

Alyssa's phone beeped and she groaned as she saw a text message from her mother - "At least he opened the door for you and was dressed nice."

"The good news is you have manners and she approved of your wardrobe".

Tim laughed, "At least there's something. But come on, it was fine. She didn't say anything and she was smiling."

She couldn't help but break his spirit, "It was a fake smile. Don't hold your breath on her liking you. So I hope it's not important to you."

Tim placed his hand on her thigh as he drove, "Is it important to you?"

She laughed, "If my mom likes you? Of course not. I'm aware she doesn't like anyone - she doesn't even like me half the time."

Tim frowned, "You know that's not true."

Alyssa didn't respond. She didn't want to get into it, not right now and not ever. He'd eventually see what she meant for himself, and that was going to be bad enough.

They arrived to the restaurant first and sat down to wait for Alyssa's best friend Cindy and her boyfriend Eugene. They were seated in a booth and as they waited Alyssa rested her head on Tim's shoulders. He gave her knee a squeeze and told her to relax.

Cindy and Eugene arrived at that moment, apologizing for being late. After introductions were made and everyone had ordered Cindy was the first one to break the ice. She hadn't heard that much about Tim - just the basics, but she knew Alyssa had always been a fan of his.

"So the elusive Tim Lincecum huh. Who would have thought you'd be found on a dating app of places."

Alyssa groaned as Tim laughed.

"Yeah. I never thought about it either until my friends opened the profile for me."

"Nice. Alyssa has been on those apps for years. I couldn't do it, I always thought I was going to be kidnapped or something."

Eugene laughed as Cindy continued, "Honestly though. I was dragged to enough of your games that this is a good surprise."

Tim glanced over at Alyssa who was starting to blush, "I may have never missed one of your starts in Florida."

Cindy decided to continue to poke fun, "Ummm, as a I recall didn't you leave me waiting in your driveway for 20 minutes before the Beyonce concert because you had to finish watching a game on TV."

Alyssa laughed, covering her face with her hands. Tim just smiled as he said, "interesting."

Alyssa quickly changed the subject; but for most of the night the girls monopolized the conversation. Tim jumped in here and there and tried to throw around conversation starters when they let him. Euguene for the most part was quiet, something Alyssa still couldn't get used to. Tim tried to talk to him, but it was mostly one word replies. When the night was over they exchanged their farewells and walked slowly back to Tim's car.

Alyssa didn't feel like going home yet. She wanted to spend some more time with Tim - "Can we go back to your place and just watch a movie or something".

Tim kissed her forehead softly, "Of course we can".

She loved those forehead kisses almost as much as she loved the passionate ones.

Once they were settled in Tim's place, on the couch with the TV on, Alyssa had to ask what Tim thought of the night.

"I had fun. Although I'm kind of surprised actually."

Alyssa frowned slightly as she looked at Tim, "Why?"

Tim grinned, "I wasn't aware you were such a baseball groupie".

Alyssa frowned as she tried to hide behind a couch pillow, "I can't believe she said all that". She could feel her face heating up.

Tim scooted closer to Alyssa and began to tickle her, "Kind of adorable really."

Alyssa was giggling due to Tim's tickles and when he stopped she scooted into his arms. It was so cozy and she felt so incredibly safe wrapped up in his arms. It was crazy the amount of trust she had in Tim in such a short time.

Alyssa would be lying if she said she paid attention to the movie on the screen - she kept sneaking in kisses and their hands playfully groped each other. But they kept it just as teasing and when the movie was over Tim took Alyssa home.

She closed the door behind her and leaned against the door. Even with all the awkwardness of the night, she had a fantastic time. And she didn't care what Cindy or her mother's opinion of Tim was going to be. She didn't want to hear it - her opinion of him was all that mattered.

[alynicoleee]

Beginning of Forever: Chapter Twenty

Title: Beginning of Forever (Chapter 20) Pairing: Tim Lincecum / OFC POV: Third Person - Tim Lincecum Pairing: PG-13

Tim landed back in Miami late Monday and all he wanted to do was see Alyssa. It was late so he thought twice about texting her and decided to wait until morning. He was hoping her work schedule this week would allow some time for them to see each other, sooner rather than later.

He was serious when he told that her that he was all in. His dad was right, good things were allowed to happen to him. It had felt like nothing good had happened to him in years, but this - this felt right. He could tell from Alyssa's text on Thanksgiving night that she was a little skeptical. He didn't blame her - they had started good and then he had slammed on the breaks without warning. Now he wanted to speed things up again.

The next morning Tim texted Alyssa early and was slightly worried when hours had passed and she hadn't responded. She was usually a pretty fast texter.

Her response came slightly before noon and Tim couldn't help but laugh, "Good Morning - yes, it's morning. Don't judge me."

"Did you really just wake up?"

"Yes I did. And even though it's almost noon - I am pouring some coffee and about to eat breakfast."

"So if breakfast is now - does that mean I'm inviting you to lunch or dinner?"

"Well that depends - if it's lunch, I definitely won't make it but if it's dinner I definitely will."

"Dinner it is then. Any preference?"

"Some place that has Tequila. I've had a long few days that I will gladly tell you about over alcohol."

Tim smiled, "Pick a place and send me the details. Wherever your favorite cocktail is made."

"Sounds like a plan."

Tim noted down the address and began to clean around the apartment - there wasn't much to clean. Like most places Tim had lived in - the place was mostly bare. He had a hard time ever getting around to decorating past the necessities. You would think he had just moved in when in reality he had been there for five months - since July. He had signed a one year lease and didn't know if he would stick around. The plan had been to disconnect from what he had known for a year. But he was hopeful that plan would change and he would stick around longer.

He arrived to the restaurant Alyssa had chosen right as her car was pulling into the parking lot. He was more than happy to see her, and when they met up at the entrance he couldn't help but wrap her in a hug. She felt so right in his arms.

They walked in and after Alyssa had ordered her much needed cocktail - before even opening the menu - they began to catch each other up on the holiday weekend.

By the time the night came to an end they were all smiles. Alyssa was laughing, seemingly having forgotten the rough weekend she had at work. Alyssa was going to be taking a few days off work in the coming weeks and he was hoping to get more time with her during that time.

He really wanted to make this work. They had talked about his sudden urge to make everything work but he couldn't explain how in the short time that he had known her, she lit a spark in him. A spark that had been dim for some time.

But he could sense her apprehension with everything - he knew he was broken; he always had. Alyssa disagreed that he was broken but made no secret of hiding the fact that she understood he had trauma and pain in his life, and that he needed to sort everything out. Tim understood and while he had gotten help before he hadn't gotten any lately. So he let her know that he was going to search for a therapist in Miami, promising to find someone to help him work things out. He wasn't ashamed of going to therapy, he had been going for longer than he was willing to admit. But recently he hadn't found a reason to continue to go - except for now, for her.

Alyssa lifted her hand up to his face and stroked his cheek softly as she spoke, "I don't want you to feel like you can't count on me too, because you can, but I want to make sure that you're okay first - even if that means it's not with me. But if I can help you heal, I want to do that too."

Tim smiled and placed his hand over hers before moving in and giving her a soft kiss, "You have no idea how much all of this means to me". For a while they just sat there, foreheads touching, gazing into each others eyes and smiling. It was simple and sweet, and exactly what he needed.

[alynicoleee]

Beginning of Forever: Chapter Nineteen

Title: Beginning of Forever (Chapter 19) Pairing: Tim Lincecum / OFC POV: Third Person - OFC Rating: PG-13

Alyssa spent Thanksgiving morning decorating her Christmas tree and then headed to her boss's house to spend Thanksgiving with coworkers who had become friends. The majority of people in Alyssa's life were people she met at work. It was the only good thing about working in retail - there was so much turnover that she was constantly making new friends. Unfortunately the friendships seldom lasted once people moved on from the job.

Alyssa arrived first - much like she always did. As the night progressed she was pleased to find that almost all of the attendees were single women. She had been worried that she would have to spend the holiday surrounded by couples and being reminded yet again that she was alone.

Tim had slowed things down on what was a fast and hot start to something that maybe shouldn't have taken off as fast as it did. I mean - did people really find their life long partners online? Alyssa couldn't help but hope so. She kept her phone in her purse all night, she wasn't expecting to hear from Tim again until the next day. They kept their communication simple and it was mostly a slew of messages in the middle of the day.

Alyssa ate, drank and mingled but soon it was time to leave as she had work the next morning. She arrived home, kicked off her shoes and pulled out her phone to set her alarm for the next day and was surprised to find a text from Tim waiting for her.

"I think spending time with my dad was much needed. I'm in. I'm all in. Date night when I get back?"

Alyssa smiled as she collapsed in bed. She had to admit that she was a bit dissapointed when Tim slowed things down and took it back to a friendship. But now she was wondering if he was jumping in too fast again. The man had trauma, issues he was dealing with, and maybe those should have been red flags to her but she didn't care. She wanted to jump in with him. She wanted to help him heal, help him move on and she wanted to be the one to make him happy because he sure as hell made her happy when they were together.

"I would love that. But I hope you'll tell me what's changed your mind."

"I talked to my dad, about everything. There is no one that knows me better in this world. And he just said some things to me that made sense. So I decided I'm ready. I'm ready to open myself up again, to let someone else in, and share love again."

Alyssa read the message multiple times, the last few words sticking with her - share love. She really wanted to share love with someone, she wanted that feeling more than she wanted anything else in the world.

"That sounds amazing Tim. See you when you get back."

It was going to be a long weekend waiting for him to get back.

[alynicoleee]

Beginning of Forever: Chapter Eighteen

Title: Beginning of Forever (Chapter 18) Pairing: Tim Lincecum / OFC POV: Third Person - Tim Lincecum Rating: PG-13

Tim walked around his dad's house and noticed that his dad had set up a few Christmas knick knacks around the place. His dad had never been one for decorating - their holidays had mostly been meek and quiet, just the two of them for many years.

Tim had wished Alyssa a happy thanksgiving and she had responded back, stating that she hoped he had a nice time with his family. He sat in the kitchen island drinking coffee when his dad walked him.

"Good Morning Tim".

"Good Morning Dad. I like the Christmas details starting to pop up."

"Thanks. I thought I'd add something to cheer up the place a little."

Tim nodded and stared into his cup.

"You okay son?"

Tim looked up and sighed. He hadn't talked about Alyssa to anyone, but kind of wanted to.

"When did you know you were ready to move on? After Mom left?"

Tim and his father's situation wasn't the same. His wife had passed away after they had been together for ten years. While his mom had left his father one day after they had been together for over fifteen years. They had both lost their partner but in significantly different ways. He knew it wasn't the same - but maybe his dad would be able to offer some sort of perspective.

Tim's father, Chris, sighed. "I don't know if there was ever a point where I said - I'm ready. Now is the time. For a few years there I lived vicariously through you, through your career, so I didn't really have time to even think about a relationship. I want to say that it was once I stopped missing your mother, once the empty feeling went away. I think that's when I knew I was ready."

Chris paused waiting for a response from Tim. When he didn't get one he continued, "Are you thinking that time is moving too slow? Or maybe too fast? There's no definitive time table here. No one can tell you if it's too soon or not soon enough. Only you'll know when the time is right. If it feels right."

Tim had been listening to his dad and looked back down into his cup. "I met someone. And I don't know. Sometimes I feel like I'm ready to go and start something but then other times I feel guilty, like I'm moving on too fast."

Chris sat down next Tim and placed a hand on his shoulder, "It's okay to feel guilty. But Cristin wouldn't want you to dwell and be alone forever. She'd want you to be happy and find love again."

"I know. And I tell myself that Cristin would be okay with my moving on, but then I'll go a few days where I don't even think of her, and that's when I begin to feel guilty. And I know that's not fair. To me, to her memory, or even to the woman I met."

"You want to tell me about her? Or is that prying into something that you don't even know where it stands right now."

"You know it's never prying Dad. And I always value your input. You know Drew and Sean were down in Miami in late October. Drew being Drew decided he'd download one of those dating apps on my phone and set me up with a profile. I didn't think I was even going to use it but I did. For the most part the app was pretty mundane, matches didn't really go anywhere - but than I matched with this one woman - Alyssa. I think what made it different with her was that she seemed so relaxed and nonchalant right from the beginning. And she knew exactly who I was - but never made a big deal out of. In fact, even now I don't think she's ever mentioned anything about my playing days. She knew who I was but treated me like just another random match. I liked that."

Tim moved to put his cup in the sink as he continued talking, "We went out twice and the connection was incredible. It felt like I had known her my whole life and then I got scared that everything was feeling right and maybe moving too fast. So I kind of back tracked and we started over, going slower. But sometimes I feel like it's a snail pace, but I don't want it to feel rushed either. But she's amazing. She's giving me space and time to figure everything out, but I don't know if that's even fair to her and I don't want to hurt her either.

Tim sighed as he leaned against the countertop and waited for his dad to tell him something he didn't want to hear, but instead Chris just sat and responded, "Son, good things are allowed to happen to you too. And they don't need to be difficult, or hard or come with sacrifices. They can just be."

[alynicoleee]

Beginning of Forever: Chapter Seventeen

Title: Beginning of Forever (Chapter 17) Pairing: Tim Lincecum / OFC POV: Third Person - Tim Lincecum Rating: PG-13

Tim arrived home feeling relieved and thankful. She was still in. Still willing to give whatever this was a chance to evolve. Tim knew he didn't deserve it - he should have never ghosted her. Especially not after the two great dates they had.

The talk at Starbucks really helped get everything into perspective. He learned a lot about Alyssa and he was able to explain a lot about himself as well. He was still scared - but he was more scared of hurting her. Even though they were in their late 30s he had lived more life than she had and he didn't want his outlook on things to taint her happy and sunny disposition.

They seemed to be on the same page though - they were going to take things slow and not rush it. Become friends, then lovers, and then who knows what the future held. Marriage and kids wasn't a priority for either of them - happiness was.

Tim took out his phone as he sat on his couch and typed out, "Hi".

She responded back after a few minutes, "Hi. :)".

It was exactly the same way they had started their conversation when they matched on the dating app. Tim smiled as he typed out, "I hope you have a great rest of your day."

For the next two weeks Tim continued contact with Alyssa. They texted daily but not for a marathon of hours. They had met up once more since their Starbucks date but Tim had kept it friendly. He wanted to take things slow - keep those feelings of him doing something wrong away - and maybe kissing her on the second date was too soon. He still wasn't sure about anything, many times he just felt new to everything, with a boggled mind. Maybe grief did that, he wasn't sure.

Tim went to Seattle for Thanksgiving but he made sure to give Alyssa a heads up before he left. She would be spending the day with friends - explaining that her family wasn't really one for family gatherings. They weren't that close; even if they all lived in the same city. Tim knew that feeling, other than his dad he wasn't that close to his family either, even him and Sean had grown apart in the last few years he was alive. This year he would be sharing Thanksgiving with his dad, aunt, uncle and cousins. He had spent the last holiday with them as well but it had felt odd, everyone tip toeing around him to avoid saying anything. He hoped this year it would be a little less awkward. He wasn't really in the mood to spend time with extended family, hadn't been in a while, but his dad wanted him there so he reluctantly agreed.

When he got off the plane, his dad was waiting for him.

They exchanged greetings and hugs; the car ride to his dad's silent but comfortable. Somehow the two always understood each other, and for a second Tim thought that maybe the holiday wouldn't be so bad.

[alynicoleee]

Beginning of Forever: Chapter Sixteen

Title: Beginning of Forever (Chapter 16) Pairing: Tim Lincecum / OFC POV: 3rd Person - OFC Rating: PG-13

Alyssa didn't know why she responded. She should have left the text go unanswered like he had, but she couldn't, so she responded.

"Hi".

She didn't know what else to say. She wanted to say a lot - wanted to know what happened. But she also didn't want to attack him right away. That would have been rude.

"Can we meet up to talk? Grab a coffee if you're not busy?"

Alyssa thought about it for only a few minutes. Whatever he wanted to say he wanted to do in person. That could be a good thing, but it also gave her a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach. She agreed to meet him at a Starbucks location that was the halfway point between them in an hour.

When she arrived Tim was already there - her coffee order in his hands.

"Thanks", she replied.

He motioned towards a corner table and they sat in silence for a few minutes before Tim finally spoke.

"I'm sorry. I owe you an explanation."

Alyssa shook her head, "You don't owe me anything".

"Okay, you deserve an explanation. You deserve an apology. You didn't deserve me ghosting you."

Alyssa looked up at him and tried to hide the sadness in her eyes, but it was apparent he could see it. His green eyes were dark, a sense of melancholy displayed in them.

"I panicked. It's what I do. Things were going good. And everything seemed so easy with you that I convinced myself it couldn't be true. Good things weren't supposed to come so easily. At least they never have before. I got scared. I'm telling myself that I'm ready to move on and continue with my life - but I'm terrified to get hurt. I don't know how much more pain I can take."

Alyssa sat there holding her breath as he spoke. But the more he spoke the more she slowly let out the breath she was holding and began to breathe again.

"I don't know what to say Tim. We kinda just jumped in. We talked, but not about anything deep - I guess not about the important stuff in our lives. Maybe we should do that before we figure out where we stand."

Tim agreed and for the next two hours they sat in their little corner table and talked. They talked about the past - Alyssa had been hurt countless times and Tim had lost love. They talked about their experiences - neither had a plethora of history, but while Alyssa was mostly inexperienced - Tim had been tied with serious relationships for most of his adult life. They talked about their ideologies around love - Alyssa still believed in fairy tales and happily ever afters and Tim had doubts if anything lasted forever. They talked about what they were looking for - Tim wasn't sure what he was looking for but he knew he wasn't looking to have kids, he mentioned it slowly as if it was almost a deal breaker. Alyssa was looking to feel and give love, to be happy with someone and she wasn't sure if kids were part of her future, it could go either way. They talked about their love language - Alyssa craved connection with someone and Tim realized that he did too.

They agreed they would continue to talk, see each other, and see what transpired.

Alyssa made it home that evening feeling as if a weight had been lifted off her shoulder. Somehow she felt freer than she had in a long time. A lot of things she said aloud today had been weighing her down, even if she hadn't realized it.

[alynicoleee]

Beginning of Forever: Chapter Fifteen

Title: Beginning of Forever (Chapter 15) Pairing: Tim Lincecum / OFC POV: Third Person - OFC Rating: PG

Alyssa had pulled her phone out of her pocket about a zillion times during her work day. She had texted Tim before she went to work but hadn't heard back from him. She had thought the date yesterday had gone pretty well. She could still feel that good night kiss in her bones, it was a feeling that she didn't want to lose.

By the time her shift was over she still hadn't heard from Tim. Now she was disappointed, but for some reason not surprised. It was exactly how her life always played out. She never knew what it was - but somehow she always seemed to draw everyone away from her. Then she would spend time fixated on it, and was probably missing other opportunities during that time. She was afraid to divulge to anyone that in her entire adult life she had yet to have a serious romantic relationship. She had flings sure, but nothing that held value over time. Time was just passing right by her - and many times she was too distracted and wrapped up in her own thoughts to even notice.

By the end of the day her phone was still silent. She sighed as she climbed into bed. It had been two great days, but she now found herself drifting off to sleep as a tear silently fell from the corner of her eye.

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Two weeks had gone by and it was almost as if that week had never occurred. Alyssa had gone on with her days as if nothing had happened. It almost felt like she had dreamed everything. Her text to Tim had gone unanswered, so she didn't bother to send another one. She had opened the dating app again only to find that her conversation with Tim was gone - either he had deleted the app, or he had unmatched her. Either way it seemed like any evidence that there was ever a connection was gone.

Alyssa kept on with her days like she had before she met him. But her nights were full replaying the short week of their interactions. She replayed them in her mind on a loop, trying to see if there was something she said or something that happened that would give any indication to the sudden disappearance. The more she thought about it, the sadder she got. She couldn't even explain to herself why. It was only one week - it shouldn't mean that much to her. But she had felt more seen in that one week than she had in a long time, and it was hard to move on from that.

And then her phone beeped, "Hi".

[alynicoleee]

Beginning of Forever: Chapter Fourteen

Title: Beginning of Forever (Chapter 14) Pairing: Tim Lincecum / OFC POV: Third Person - Tim Lincecum Rating: PG-13

Tim sat the duck in the passenger seat of his car and smiled. Tonight had been better than yesterday. The first kiss had been sweet, the second had been great, and the third - well; he was hoping to have plenty more like that. He didn't think he was going to work up the nerve to kiss her tonight, but the energy was there. They were vibing so well together that it didn't feel like they were in their late 30s and trying to navigate their life - it felt like they were in their early 20s without a care in the world. It was exactly what he needed.

He got home, placed the duck on his bed and took a picture for Alyssa.

Her response came in right away, "Hahaha! Thank you for being such a good sport. The duckie does look great there."

Tim glanced back at the duck and decided that he was going to keep him right there. It reminded him of the great night they had just had. He didn't have to try to be someone he wasn't with Alyssa. For the last two days he had been himself - unapologetically goofy and carefree and she seemed to really enjoy that.

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Tim woke up the next morning with his head on the duck. It instantly bought a smile to his face. The need to see Alyssa again was beginning to scare him. He wasn't that person - he was used to living life on his own and fitting in love and relationships when he had time. He never let them consume him or take up all his time. In hindsight, that was his biggest regret with Cristin. By the time he was all in - ready to stop splitting time between two different locations - time began to run out on him. It was as if life was trying to teach him a cruel lesson.

He shook his head in an attempt to clear his thoughts. He needed a day on the golf course - away from everything and everyone. Maybe that would settle his thoughts, clear his mind and maybe bring him back down from this fantasy he seemed to be living.

Tim completed his game and pulled out his phone. He stared at the message from Alyssa but thought twice before responding. He was starting to rethink everything. It wasn't supposed to be this easy - his life was never that easy.