allmyownrandomthoughts

[allmyownrandomthoughts]

I. CRAVE. PHYSICAL. INTIMACY.

[allmyownrandomthoughts]

I wish I could make myself dream about whatever i wanted because I really want to dream about feeling loved and safe

[allmyownrandomthoughts]

I just want to be skinny so bad. Summer 2019 fucked everything up because I lost the routine of counting calories because my mom was home all the time and now I just can’t get myself to do it because I got used to eating a lot again. I wish I lived alone so bad so I could just measure everything and buy and make my own food to make sure I don’t buy any bad foods

ugh

I’m only like 10lbs away from my ugw and not making any progress is so frustrating.

[allmyownrandomthoughts]

i just want to bury my head in a mans chest while we wraps his strong arms around me, making me forget about the world for a second

i don’t think that’s too much to ask

[allmyownrandomthoughts]

I JUST WANT SOMEONE TO THINK IM FUCKING HOT

[allmyownrandomthoughts]

I had a sexy dream about me and a youtuber I watch and now watching his videos is a bit strange lol

[allmyownrandomthoughts]

i’m realizing it’s a good thing i hate myself so much because i would literally be the most annoying person on the planet if i actually thought i was worthy of being loved

[allmyownrandomthoughts]

im sorry but EYESLASH EXTENSIONS are literally THE MOST HIDEOUS THING you can put on your face and I CANNOT for THE LIFE OF ME understand WHY ANYONE would want to do that to themselves????????????

[allmyownrandomthoughts]

kink 1: alex turner singing “cause you’re a good girl and you know it” in arctic monkeys’ cover of hold on, we’re going home

kink 2: alex turner singing “I undid your gown” in tlsp’ cover of is this what you wanted

[allmyownrandomthoughts]

i just want to be touched by someone who thinks i’m beautiful

[allmyownrandomthoughts]

I really miss my theatre teacher </3 I also haven’t gone back to my old school to see any of the plays that the people in the grades below me have done this year on purpose because I don’t want to meet any teachers and have them asking me what I do now :(

[allmyownrandomthoughts]

bitch calm down you should have learned that you shouldnt talk about new music after the first time you hear it. its a few weeks later and you have listened to that song like 5 times today so like sit down maybe

yes, the music is a little bit generic BUT everything else about the songs is good so its still a good song. 

so bastille just dropped doom days and… its so bad? it sound like literally every other generic song that’s popular right now

i was fearing that this was the direction they were going in from the mixtape and happier etc but since qpm and 4am isn’t like that I thought doom days would be different… now im not so sure anymore

i know it’s only one song and the other two songs i’ve heard from doom days are good and whatever but still

im literally so sad lol

[allmyownrandomthoughts]

I just got the urge to put fake nails on (as you do when you’re home alone and your mom who doesn’t like fake nails can’t judge you) so I fucking took my fake nails out and fucking fitted them to my nails and started to fuckin file them a little

I was JUST about to start gluing them on, but my glue was fucking dried????? I was so pissed but since I really wanted to put them on I seriously BIKED to my closest store because I thought I had seen nail glue there, guess what. THEY DIDN’T HAVE ANY GOSH DARN NAIL GLUE. my social anxiety ass even ASKED an employee that’s how desperate I was but no. so I decided to go to another store that is like literally next to the other one even though I was 99.9% sure they didn’t have glue, and they didn’t. 

I just went to TWO stores ALONE for nothing and now I’m pissed af bc I really wanted to feel like a badass with some black stiletto nails :(

[allmyownrandomthoughts]

ugh I just want a hot man (preferably in his mid 30s) with big hands to firmly place a hand on my lower back??? I feel like that is a desire that is totally normal and not oddly specific or weird at all?

[allmyownrandomthoughts]

birthdays really fucking suck when you don’t want to be alive

like thanks for reminding me that i just spent another year of my life being a worthless piece of shit failure

[allmyownrandomthoughts]

Eurovision semifinal 2!!

1 Armenia: Don’t really know what to say about this. Super edgy etc but it kind of leaves me wanting more? Not bad but not great 5/10

2 Ireland: Not great singing? This one also feels a bit more karaoke than eurovison. Kind of cute but she sounds really bored? Which doesn’t fit the aesthetics or music at all. Im confused 4/10

3 Moldova: I’m like 99% sure this sand thing has been done in eurovison before? So that’s boring. The song is not bad but it’s also not really that special 4/10

4 Switzerland: Im crying the red background is like taken straight from Benjamin Ingrosso lol but okay other than that not bad I guess but I’m sorry I can’t think past that. It’s a guy singing about dancing with a red backgroud... You could have at least waited a couple of years before copying someone else’s concept lol 3/10

5 Latvia: Not a fan of her voice but other than that? Yes please! It has like one sentence that she sings over and over though??? So  4.5/10

6 Romania: Also slow and boring but It’s not bad and I like the aesthetics of this so 5/10 lol

7 Denmark: Sure this pretty good but why have no one in this competition heard of writing songs that actually evolve and don’t sound the same through the entire song????? IM GETTING SO BORED 5/10

8 Sweden: I might be ~slightly~ partial BUT THIS IS HOW IT’S DONE BITCHES! YAS JOHN YOU’RE DOING AMAZING SWEETIE!!!!! 10/10

9 Austria: aaaaaaaaaaaaaand im asleep again. maybe don’t make a song so high if you can’t comfortably reach those notes? 2/10

10 Croatia: Hmm. Not a bad singer, kind of interesting concept for the number I guess, boring ballad but this is good so I definetely think this should make it to the final 6/10

11 Malta: Good singer. Her energy actually matches the song and the number (take notes Ireland). This is kind of fun I guess? 6.5/10

12 Lithuania: I feel like this also not that bad? Not super impressed by the singing or anything but the song is not bad. Nothing happened in this one though so unfortunately 4.5/10

13 Russia: These mirrors make me think of camp rock hahaha. This is so overly dramatic I love it lol. Good singing so yeah. 6/10

14 Albania: I actually think this is cool haha. I like the concept, the outfits and she’s a pretty strong singer. This is also a little boring though so it gets 5/10

15 Norway: This is so good compared to Norways song last year!The jojk (no idea what that’s called in english but what the bald dude is doing) paired with the uptempo techno? Iconic 8/10

16 The netherlands: Wow okay im sad now great. The song is really good though. 7/10

17 North Macedonia: Wow we stan a feminist icon. Don’t have much else to say about this though. Great message. Actually a pretty good power ballad. 6/10

18 Azerbaijan: A pretty basic pop song but I guess it’s pretty good for what it is. Cool number, great singer. 6/10

[allmyownrandomthoughts]

hi does anyone want to buy me an at home laser hair removal machine? asking for a friend