a-sad-pun

[a-sad-pun]

[a-sad-pun]

a quick step by step guide on what to do if you come back to your apartment and find yourself locked out because your front door is frozen shut

kick the bottom of the door for 10 minutes

text your landlord

remember your landlord is on vacation and also in her mid 50′s so it takes about 36 hours to receive a response

briefly wonder why the fuck you moved the canada

remember that college tuition is significantly cheaper here than in the united states 

look up and notice your cat is at the window, staring at you. he paws at the window lightly and meows. it’s devastating. his eyes are so big and imploring. decide that you have to get inside your apartment at all costs. not even god himself can stop you from feeding your cat his chicken wet food dinner. frida kahlo herself could descend from the heavens and ask “hey you wanna bang?” and you’d say “hell yeah but first let me open this door so i can feed my cat his dinner”

remember there is a starbucks 3 blocks down the street from you

enter. the barista gives you a weird look for entering a starbucks at 7pm on a tuesday

order a venti cup of hot water. you order in french because the barista just said “bonjour” instead of “bonjour, hi.” you have a strong american accent. you hit the r in merci a little too hard to compensate. you embarrass yourself.

exit the starbucks clutching the massive cup of hot water in your hands. it’s burning your fingers.

return. methodically pour the starbucks cup of water all over the the door frame. it begins moving a little but still wont open

back up

ensure your doc martens are properly gripping the sheet of ice covering the ground. many people have told you to stop wearing doc martens in the winter, despite your protests that theyre actually the ideal winter boot. also, you’re a lesbian and punk’s not dead

release a pterodactyl screech and sprint towards the door, slamming the full force of your pathetically tiny 5′2″ 110lb body into it

you dont know any of your neighbors so you dont care about maintaining your pride anyways

the door swings open

run up the stairs

open the actual door to your apartment and yell MOMMY’S HOME MY LITTLE BITCHASS BABY BOY DONT WORRY at your cat

cat flings his body to the ground and starts purring like he does every time you come home

write tumblr post

[a-sad-pun]

christmas miracle: local guy watches their mother thrive

[a-sad-pun]

[a-sad-pun]

[a-sad-pun]

[a-sad-pun]

I love how in disney cartoons when a prince is like "father I have met a mysterious forest woman and she is the love of my life and I cannot possibly marry who you wish me to" the king is always like "No!!!!! you can't fall in love with a forest woman!!!!!! you must marry a princess!!!!!" instead of what a king would have said in real life, which is "why are you telling me about the forest woman. this has no impact whatsoever on your marriage to the princess. we all have a forest woman. it's 1183 and we're barbarians"

[a-sad-pun]

[a-sad-pun]

Ayoo just to preempt the inevitable dumb takes we’re about to start seeing;

I am PRO-WOOL

I am PRO-LEATHER

I am PRO-BEES

Fuck the idea of replacing durable, sustainable animal products with cheap, flimsy plastic that doesn’t bio-degrade. Agave nectar and other artificial sweeteners are expensive, labor-intensive, and destroy the environment to be farmed.

Do not buy into pernicious marketing campaigns pushed by dickhead organizations trying to stay relevant, like PETA.

[a-sad-pun]

Sooo... anyone got inspired by this drawfee video? Sorry for the departure from my usual stuff, but I had to- also the hades style is so fun to mess around with, I highly recommend! I don't tend to draw real people, so it feels weird, but kinda proud how they turned out :'D

[a-sad-pun]

Sleepover Gothic

[a-sad-pun]

there is something so crazy and powerful about having art of your oc that was made by anyone other than yourself. like oh my god you actually exist outside of my own brain that's WILD

[a-sad-pun]

i've been meaning to draw these two again 😭

[a-sad-pun]

i have no drawtectives fanart to offer yet other than this premonition of julia trying to keep up with the squad absolutely derailing the story

[a-sad-pun]

[a-sad-pun]

Peoples' desire to burn the Gävle goat isn't about them hating it. It's a "my son loved your drawing so much that he ate it" sort of a deal.