a-door-for-you-customer

[a-door-for-you-customer]

brriing.

brriing.

brri- *click*

"Hello, I'd like to purchase an electromagnetic door. My address is

78 (REDACTED) street."

Huh. That... Was new. He didn't usually get calls....

"Well, alright, esteemed customer! We'll get your requested door to you in no time!"

[a-door-for-you-customer]

Hello, I'm in the market for a new door. Whatcha got?

"That's exactly what I was waiting for you to ask!"

He lifted up a blue door, rather simple looking. Nice nonetheless.

"A nice, elegant door. Perfect for a person like you! Unless you'd like something else?"

[a-door-for-you-customer]

I have a question, do you sell trapdoors too? Technically a door right-

"Yeah! If I can find them that is-"

[a-door-for-you-customer]

( Not the usual muse but-)

“Stand back door villain!” Shouted an ornate and golden door. “It is I, Boltergeist Guardian spirit of doors! Now I shall ask you this, why are you stealing such a fantastic door and taking it away from its home, huh? HUH?”

@ask-two-immortals

"Woah what the fuck-"

The sleazy salesman took a step back, almost dropping the rest of his doors in the process.

"Look, man, I just need to sell this door again, alright? No harm, no foul."

Just a bit of cash, that's all Harold needed.

[a-door-for-you-customer]

Oh... Hello, sir...

Ayo, someone's selling doors?

I-

(@remaking-machine)

"Indeed I am! What are you looking for?"

Usually, when people knew about him before he arrived, they'd been either referred by someone who didn't know he'd stolen their door or someone who did. They didn't look to have the intention of hurting him, so he guessed it was the former.

[a-door-for-you-customer]

His TV was speaking to him. Was he dreaming? It was the only thing that made the situation make some sort of sense, after all. There was no harm in talking to the TV man, after all, it wasn't real. At least, that's what he was telling himself to keep some semblance of calm.

"... Well, it's nice to meet you, Altair. The name's Harold, well known door to door door salesman. Why... Are you in my TV, again? Wouldn't it be more interesting to be in Steve Jobs' TV, or most other people?"

Yeah, the well known part was pure bullshit, but Altair didn't have to know that, now did he?

"ah, another successful trip into someone's television."

@pixllatedinterferxnce (I present to you, bby <33)

"Wh- Huh- Hello??"

If a person could buffer, then that was certainly what Harold was doing. One second he was watching TV, though, with all honesty, it wasn't something that he was interested it, and the next there was a man in his TV.

"H- How did you get in there?-"

[a-door-for-you-customer]

I'd like a door mr salesman I havent been able to find a purple one :0 I'd it has one of those lil mini windows that'd be awesome- 🔮

"Well, you're in luck! I recently obtained-"

Rather, stole-

"-A door that fits your criteria!"

A few seconds of rummaging was enough for the salesman to find a door that fit his customer's demands to the letter, straightening his tie with his free hand.

[a-door-for-you-customer]

"... There's the police? You could go talk to the police?"

This had to be a dream, right? There was no way it wasn't one. The idea of a child making another child work was, frankly, laughable at best, and outright ridiculous at worst.

( *skitters in* @ask-the-depressed-demon) Ah yes. Lovely day to have kidnapped your best friend once again from her forced workplace. Where tf are they? Arthur looks around as Hazy just leans onto his head as she sits upright on their shoulders. “Arthur look out-“ He nearly trips over someone-

Harold was in the middle of a sale, well, if you could call it that. The was certain the person was about to pull a gun on him, but it wasn't the worst someone had done. Either way, that was the least of his concerns when a child's voice rang out, confusion clear in his face. He turned to face them, only to almost fall when he realized just how tall one of them was. He knew he wasn't the tallest, but this... Bomb? Was he a bomb? Well. This was certainly new.

"... Are you two alright?"

[a-door-for-you-customer]

"ah, another successful trip into someone's television."

@pixllatedinterferxnce (I present to you, bby <33)

"Wh- Huh- Hello??"

If a person could buffer, then that was certainly what Harold was doing. One second he was watching TV, though, with all honesty, it wasn't something that he was interested it, and the next there was a man in his TV.

"H- How did you get in there?-"

[a-door-for-you-customer]

Oh noo, not tryna sell ya anything like that. Thanks for tellin me (｡•̀ᴗ-)✧

- Mod Saccharo (the starter shall commence soon)

(👀👀👀)

"Suspicious, but I'll take it."

Sweet summer child that questions nothing.

[a-door-for-you-customer]

(Hi I'm the mun for @tiana-n-pen, u followed my other blog and u gave me inspiration)

Another day, another scam. Harold was removing a door from an apartment, and when he went to add it to the sack, but when he looked back, the door was just, back. He still had the door, but also it was still on its hinges like nothing happened

"... Did the matrix just glitch?-"

Harold had never been the sharpest tool in the shed, and what just happened was certainly not what he'd expected out of today. He took a confused step back, the salesman's eyes narrowing as his mind spun for an answer.

[a-door-for-you-customer]

❝ why. WHY. did you take my door? ❞

< @gunsmcke >

Ah, not the first person to ask that, unsurprisingly.

"Profit! And the fact that it is awfully tacky. I was doing you a favor."

Of course, he had to diss his taste in doors, of all things.

[a-door-for-you-customer]

"We can still-"

Before he could finish his sentence Harold was bodied to the ground, falling like a log, straight on his chest. He barely had a chance to recover before the hold, at which point he knew, without a shadow of a doubt, that he was completely and totally screwed. Now, what he was about to do was nothing short of petty, seeing as he was the instigator of all of this to start with, but frankly, given his current situation... He didn't really give a fuck. He squirmed in the hold, his scrawny, unkempt frame not making his current mission any easier, but, finally, when he thought all hope was lost... the sole of his shoe touched the door he'd just taken. Jackpot. In a split second, the door was gone.

"Hah! You're not getting your door back now-"

He really should be more concerned about himself, but really, he just wanted to spite the other. Reckless and stupid? Sure, but he won the fight. Ignoring the fact it was the least important part of it all.

Harold walked around TGG, his doors in tow. So many potential customers around, or simply curious, disturbed people, he almost couldn't choose who to advertise his wares to. That is, until he saw a certain someone. By that he meant a certain door. Could it be? Was this the door of the one in charge? It certainly looked like it, from its decor. He waited until no one was looking at him, and then... The door was gone from its place, added to his wares. It was time for the sales pitch.

"Excuse me, but I've noticed you don't have a door. Would you be interested in looking at my wares?"

(@a-door-for-you-customer )

Rebecca blinks as she comes from the corner. Goddamnit she was just getting some food so the goddamn flirty half smoke man would eat.

“What the f-”

“….he took our fucking door.” Garcello was fucking baffled. What the fuck, why the fuck, WHO the fuck. These were all questions he was having the feeling he didn’t want answers to, because they would be so stupid he would drop dead right then and there. Here lies Garcello, killed by idiocy. Surprisingly it wasn’t even his own.

[a-door-for-you-customer]

Very random question (that totally won't potentially make me toss one of my muses at you) but do you have a tv?

- Mod Saccharo

(👀)

"A TV? Yes? Are you trying to sell me a TV?-"

The salesman tilted his head, very confused. Usually he'd be the one asking something along those lines, after all.

[a-door-for-you-customer]

And so the salesman ran as fast as his legs could take him, which, admittedly, was far slower than he'd hoped. Maybe he should exercise more after this. Or was it the added weight of the doors making him go so slow compared to everyone else?

"We can talk about this! I'll give you a 90% discount, a door at the bargain price of t- ten dollars!-"

Harold couldn't help but stutter, after all, he'd never been chased by this many people before, and he knew he was very, very fucked.

Harold walked around TGG, his doors in tow. So many potential customers around, or simply curious, disturbed people, he almost couldn't choose who to advertise his wares to. That is, until he saw a certain someone. By that he meant a certain door. Could it be? Was this the door of the one in charge? It certainly looked like it, from its decor. He waited until no one was looking at him, and then... The door was gone from its place, added to his wares. It was time for the sales pitch.

"Excuse me, but I've noticed you don't have a door. Would you be interested in looking at my wares?"

(@a-door-for-you-customer )

Rebecca blinks as she comes from the corner. Goddamnit she was just getting some food so the goddamn flirty half smoke man would eat.

“What the f-”

“….he took our fucking door.” Garcello was fucking baffled. What the fuck, why the fuck, WHO the fuck. These were all questions he was having the feeling he didn’t want answers to, because they would be so stupid he would drop dead right then and there. Here lies Garcello, killed by idiocy. Surprisingly it wasn’t even his own.

[a-door-for-you-customer]

You know what!

WOULD YOU LIKE A DOOR?!

THATS RIGHT IM SELLING YOU DOOR

How the turn tables

"A- I... Already have a door?-"

Well, that certainly caught him off guard, he almost dropped his merchandise. This was definitely new-

[a-door-for-you-customer]

door

*eats a door*

"Don't eat my merchandise you- Termite-"

Great insult, Harold. Either way, the salesman held the other doors close to his frame protectively, though he almost fell from their combined weight.