911lonestarangstweek

[911lonestarangstweek]

It does, thank you so much! It’s an animation so that’s why I was wondering lol definitely a heavy project. Worst case scenario I make something else for free day :] Thanks again!

Ooh an animation sounds amazing! I really hope to see it, whether it’s for this challenge or not!

[911lonestarangstweek]

Dad. Dad. Dad. It's okay. I'm so sorry. It's okay, it's okay.

requested by anonymous

[911lonestarangstweek]

I was just wondering will there be like a grace period of when we can submit our work? Like if I miss day 3 can I post it later on and still have it count? I was wondering because I’m working on a separate project for lone star that just so happened to be angst and would for the free day but I am unsure if it would be done in time. Sorry if this has an obvious answer/has already been answered 😓

Hi! Sorry it took us a minute to get to this question.

So, obviously part of the challenge is to post on the specified day, but we’re not going to police that. We get that life is busy and we totally understand that it’s not always possible to do things to a specific schedule.

We (the mods) honestly still have to discuss how we’re going to handle things during the week but we’ll do our best to reblog everyone’s work whether they’re on the right day or not.

Hope that answers your question!

[911lonestarangstweek]

Lone star characters once @911lonestarangstweek happens

[911lonestarangstweek]

I am frothing at the mouth over this challenge. I only joined the ls fandom recently so I’m extremely excited that I get to contribute :D Fair warning that Mateo will not be escaping the angst 🫡

welcome to the fandom, we’re so excited to have you and we can’t wait to see your prompt fills! the world definitely needs more mateo angst

[911lonestarangstweek]

Welcome to Angst Week: The Return

Banner by @tellmegoodbye

I know it’s been a while, but welcome back to all our fellow angst lovers, writers and creators; we’re so excited to see you!

Welcome to Round 3 of Angst week, aptly titled Angst Week: The Return. 

This will be a seven day run (Round 2 was nine days, so it’s a little bit shorter), running from March 24th to March 30th, 2025. This time, we’re celebrating the five seasons of Lone Star, so each day’s prompt is an episode title, a quote, or a situation/theme from that season. Feel free to use just one, or mix it up with all three!

The prompts are for inspiration only. Basically: no, you do not need to create an episode coda/include the exact quote/centre it around the exact incident. You can do these if you choose to, but you can also let your imagination go completely wild. 

We’re not cops; anything goes, as long as you follow the golden rule:

Make it angsty. 

In this context, angst is being used as an umbrella term to include all forms of hurt. This week also includes whump, hurt/comfort, emotions, sickfics, basically anything as long as the entire thing isn’t happy. This is also open to the entire angst range. From soft hurt/comfort that still has fluff, to full on near-death whump: it’s all welcomed and encouraged!

What hashtags do we use? Is there and ao3 collection? Other information about posting? Okay, you’re getting ahead of us here. We just wanted to get the basic info out now so people can begin working on their submissions if they would like! Closer to the event, we will post some reminders that will include the information you need to post (but short answer: tag will probably be the same as before and there will be ao3 collection)

Any other questions? Send us an ask, or message @aliceschuyler or @morganaspendragonss privately and we will do our best to answer (we are both in different timezones, so one of us will catch your message). Thanks!

Here are the prompts - the bit everyone is waiting for!

Day 1 - 24th March - Season 1 Austin, We Have a Problem | “You promised me this would never happen again.”  | Gunshot wound

Day 2 - 25th March - Season 2 Displaced | “Whatever happens, it’s on me.” | (Un)natural disaster 

Day 3 - 26th March - Season 3 In the Unlikely Event of an Emergency | “How bad is it?” | Loss

Day 4 - 27th March - Season 4 Road Kill | “We all have a death sentence hanging over our heads.” | Drugged

Day 5 - 28th March - Season 5 Fall from Grace | “126 forever.” | Poison

Day 6 - 29th March Take your favourite moment/scenario/quote from any season and make it as angsty as you like - bonus points if it wasn’t angsty to start with! Even more bonus points if you don’t make it about Carlos, TK or Tarlos. 

Day 7 - 30th March - Free day

[911lonestarangstweek]

I’m so excited for this year!! If you don’t mind me asking, do you have an idea of when it’ll be?

hi! we're so glad to hear you're excited for the upcoming event.

the official date announcement will come when the prompts are finalised, but we can reveal that it will be sometime in march!

[911lonestarangstweek]

Happy (belated) new year! What are your writing goals for the year? How much angst do you want to see?

[911lonestarangstweek]

Angst Fam, we want to hear from you!

What would you like to see in future angst prompts? (Almost) anything goes, but we’d just like to get some feedback from you all.

Tag us or reply to this post and let us know - we want to make angst week the best week we can!

[911lonestarangstweek]

Friends, family, fellow angst lovers, we are looking at returning for 2025! We are a small but mighty community and angst is the name of the game. Let us know if you’re interested and we can keep you posted as we go! If you’re looking for previous angsty works from the last two, give us a tag and we can point you in the right direction.

Stay tuned!

[911lonestarangstweek]

Hello :) will you be back this year?

Possibly! I would love to do it again but I think it is just me right now and I know I don't have the time or headspace to run anything (especially solo) just yet. Maybe in the next few months, depending on how things go! Keep an eye out for updates just in case!

[911lonestarangstweek]

911 Lone Star Angst Week Masterpost

Here’s all the fics I wrote for @911lonestarangstweek round 2. I challenged myself both by writing whump and by writing them all in present tense, so it’s been a great event!

For full tags etc, see AO3.

Day 1: C - Carlos + Choke Choke on the Memories [ T | 0.8k ]

In the aftermath of the house fire, Carlos has nightmares. Thankfully TK is there to comfort him when he wakes up.

Day 2: G - Grace + Gunshot Six Shots in a Loaded Gun [ T | 1.5k ]

A simple grocery run turns into a hostage situation, and Grace has to channel her ability to keep calm while dealing with other people’s emergencies into her own, very real one.

Day 3: J - Judd + Jealous Jealous of the Wind [ M | 3.2k ]

Judd doesn’t realise it, but he has a stalker. A stalker convinced that Judd ruined their relationship and who’s out for revenge. When they meet, it starts with Judd being kidnapped and only goes downhill from there, until Judd isn’t sure whether he’s ever going to make it home to Grace.

Day 4: M - Marjan&Mateo + Missing Isn’t Someone Missing Us? [ T | 3k ]

When Marjan and Mateo don’t turn up for a shift, the others know something’s wrong but can’t contact them to find out what happened and whether they need help. Meanwhile, the missing firefighters have to work together if they want to make it out of the perilous situation that they’ve found themselves in.

Day 5: N - Nancy + Nights Nights That Never Die [ T | 2k ]

Nancy’s heading home from the bar, a walk she’s done many times before, when she interrupts an assault. She tries to help but only gets hurt for her trouble, and so has to fight to keep both herself and the victim alive.

Day 7: P - Paul + Pinned Pinned Like a Butterfly [ T | 2.4k ]

The 126 are clearing a burning warehouse when something explodes and in the resulting destruction, Paul gets pinned. Unable to free himself and being confronted by the arsonist, will his friends get to him in time before the fire engulfs the entire building?

Day 8: T - TK&Tommy(&Tim) + Trapdoor Fall Through a Bleeding Trapdoor [ T | 2.5k ]

EMS 126 get sent to treat a man who slipped and hit his head, and Tommy and TK inadvertently stumble upon a crime scene.

[911lonestarangstweek]

there ain’t a language for the things I feel

4.8k || ao3

In the wake of a tragedy, the firehouse family tries to move on and pick up the pieces while holding onto hope that seems to slip further and further away.

But nothing’s over until it’s over and they’re going to pick up all the pieces and put them back together, just in case. —– Day 9 of @911lonestarangstweek: Free Choice

Me getting this done and up just at the end of angst week? More likely than you’d think.

Several people read parts of this as I was working, but @moviegeek03 needs a special thanks for helping me with some of the specifics 💜

————–

The house at the end of the street looked like all the others. 

Its blue siding blended in perfectly with its companions on the quiet residential street and as Judd pulled into the familiar driveway, nothing looked amiss. From the outside, it looked like nothing had happened. From where they stood, everything was fine and this was just a normal day and an average visit. Right now they could be heading to game night or dinner. They could be stopping by to say hello, popping by unannounced as they so often did. But the minute they opened the door that illusion would shatter and they’d have to face the grim reality waiting for them, so they all hovered at the edge of the front walk by some unspoken agreement as they allowed themselves to avoid this for just a few moments longer. 

But ignorance couldn’t last forever so eventually, they moved forward. 

It was Paul that made the first move, pulling out his keys and selecting the correct one as he approached the door. He slid the key into the lock without a word, all eyes on him as he turned it, pushing open the door to reveal the scene beyond it. There was another moment of collective hesitation on the threshold before Judd stepped forward, grabbing the yellow crime scene tape and pulling it down so they could enter their friends’ living room - or at least, what was left of it. 

The once familiar space was unrecognizable as the furniture lay in shambles; splinters of each piece scattered across the room. If they hadn’t known where they were they never would have recognized the space. Nancy toed at the remains of a chair, shifting aside the debris with her foot only to reveal the dark red stain on the floor underneath. She turned away and let the pieces fall back into it.

Keep reading

[911lonestarangstweek]

could you write about TK being upset at Owen and going to Judd for comfort? Please and thank you

though we don't share the same blood

thank you both for the wonderful prompts! i hope you enjoy what i can up with 😊

@911lonestarangstweek day 9 - free day!

thanks to @aliceschuyler for being a wonderful human and staying up to beta this for me 🥰🥰

title from brother by kodaline

ao3 | 2k | angst, emotional h/c, sad tk, big brother judd

One of the things Judd isn’t expecting when he hears his phone ping one morning is a text from Carlos asking him if he could head over to Owen’s place that afternoon. It’s not that he minds at all but, of the two of them, Judd would have thought that it would be TK reaching out to him. He’s barely exchanged two words with Carlos outside of work and while he likes the guy, they don’t exactly have a close relationship.

And, friendly and casual though Carlos’s message is, Judd knows he’s the last person Carlos would call on to hang with. Which means one thing—TK needs help, and he’s too stubborn to ask for it himself.

Judd is over at the Strand house in minutes, greeted by a bewildered Owen, who clearly didn’t know about Carlos’s request. This confuses him; if something were seriously wrong with TK, then Owen surely would be in on whatever this is, too. Still, Judd isn’t going to question it, so he just passes off his visit as wanting to talk to TK about something.

Owen takes the excuse with a shrug and waves Judd in the direction of the kitchen, before heading back to his office. What Judd is greeted with, when he rounds the corner, is a sight he’d never expected to see again in his life.

TK, pushing Carlos’s arm from round his shoulders and deliberately putting distance between them.

Judd watches as Carlos tries again, this time just a light brush of their knuckles, but again TK rebuffs him.

“Don’t touch me,” TK says, stiff as a board, though his tone seems more tired than angry. He bites his lip, staring hard at his hands for a moment, then sighs heavily and marches out of the room, leaving Carlos gazing despondently after him.

TK’s a hot-head, Judd knows this. They all saw what happened at the station the day of the fire, but Judd also knows that TK isn’t the type to make a repeat offence. More than that, Carlos isn’t the type to tolerate a repeat offence, and this interaction was so obviously different, but in what way, Judd can’t tell.

Whatever it is, it’s enough to send his concern rocketing to a peak. He knocks lightly on the doorframe to get Carlos’s attention, and raises a brow when their eyes meet. “Everything good with you two?” he asks. “Because I ain’t a marriage counsellor, Reyes.”

Carlos huffs a laugh and shakes his head, the tips of his ears turning pink. “We’re okay. It’s just…”

He trails off as voices drift down the hall, Owen’s and TK’s. Neither of them are being overly loud or snappy so Judd can’t tell exactly what they’re saying; still, the way Carlos sighs and looks at him clues him in to all he needs to know.

“Ah. I take it cohabitation is going well?”

Carlos snorts. “You don’t know the half of it. And it’s not… TK isn’t… Captain Strand…” He shakes his head, clearly at a loss, and Judd’s brows climb higher up his forehead.

“We’re back to Captain Strand now, huh? Things must be bad.”

“Not exactly,” Carlos hurries to say, but he cracks a wry smile at Judd’s disbelieving look. “Maybe. It’s not for lack of trying, though. Captain Strand is just… He’s so oblivious, like he has no idea what he’s doing, or even that he doesn’t really care, and I can’t let it keep happening anymore.”

“And…” Judd hesitates, carefully noting the tightness in Carlos’s jaw and the irritation flashing in his eyes. “What is he doing?”

Now it’s Carlos’s turn to hesitate as he looks Judd up and down. “Listen, I respect Captain Strand, of course I do, but—”

“The man can be insensitive and self-absorbed,” Judd finishes, laughing at Carlos’s startled expression. “What? I respect him too, but you have to know that I’m right. He’s intelligent, but he can be as thick as two planks of wood when it comes to other people, ‘specially if that other person is TK.”

Carlos lets out a relieved breath and sags, nodding. “Yeah. It’s just… Captain Strand is so focused on the firehouse that he doesn’t seem to care about anything else that’s going on. It hurts all of us, me and Mateo included, but TK is taking it the hardest. I think it’s bringing some stuff up for him.”

“What kind of stuff?”

It doesn’t seem possible that Carlos can look sadder, but, somehow, he manages it, shrugging helplessly. “He won’t talk to me about it. I’ve asked, but you know how TK is. He just keeps trying to pretend that he’s fine, and, Judd, he’s really good at doing that.”

“He’s had practice,” Judd surmises, and Carlos nods.

“Too much, and I know it’s something to do with Captain Strand. The thing is, I’m pretty sure that what’s going on now, TK is doing it to protect him. He’s frustrated with him, sure, but TK has spent so long trying to hide his feelings from Captain Strand that it’s kind of, I don’t know, instinctual now? And he’s doing it to protect me, too, I know he is. We really are good, I swear, but he gets overwhelmed sometimes and then he starts pushing me away to keep me from seeing it. That’s what was happening when you came in; he doesn’t like being touched when he’s riled up.”

“Huh.” Judd waits, expecting Carlos to say more, but when he doesn’t, he frowns. “I get all that, but I’m not sure I know what I’m doing here.”

“You’re the big brother he never had,” Carlos says, as though it’s obvious. “You might be able to get through to him in a way I never could.”

A part of Judd doubts that—personally, he’d much rather talk to Grace than any of his older brothers. But he owes it to TK, and to Carlos, to at least try. So he nods, and tries not to wince at the relief that fills Carlos’s entire body.

“Thank you, Judd,” he says, sounding far too earnest for Judd’s liking. “He’ll be out back.”

*

“Let me guess,” TK calls, even before Judd has made himself known. “Carlos sent you to talk to me.”

“He’s worried about you, kid.”

“He shouldn’t be. I’m fine.”

Judd snorts. “Yeah, save it. If you want to lie to your boyfriend then that’s your problem to sort out, but don’t try pulling that shit with me. It ain’t gonna work.” He eases himself down next to TK on the back porch, watching him closely. Buttercup’s head is in TK’s lap and he’s rhythmically stroking his fur, though he barely seems aware of the action.

Judd knows from experience that it’s better to let TK talk in his own time, so they just sit in silence for a long while, watching the movement of clouds across the sky. Judd has never been a fan of sitting still for long periods of time, but he forces himself to bear it this time, telling himself that it will pay off, eventually.

It must be around half an hour since he first walked out that TK finally sighs and shifts, his hands tightening slightly in Buttercup’s fur. “He won’t apologise.”

Judd raises a brow. “Who, the Cap?”

TK gives him a small nod, not looking up. “It’s just…” He bites his lip and shakes his head. “It’s dumb.”

“It ain’t dumb.”

This gets TK to look at him, surprise and disbelief written all over his expression. He scoffs, but Judd isn’t going to let this go that easily.

“It ain’t dumb,” he repeats, forcing TK to meet his eyes. “I’m guessing this is about the fire, huh?”

TK nods, then pauses a moment and shakes his head. “If I was just the fire, I could handle it,” he says quietly, and if that doesn’t break Judd’s heart, he doesn’t know what will. “Carlos and I almost died because of what he and Mr Reyes did, but they—they didn’t know what would happen, and at least Mr Reyes said he was sorry, and it’s not like I want my dad to feel guilty or anything, but—”

He breaks off and lets out a sharp laugh that sounds suspiciously wet. “Fuck. I sound like a kid again.”

“No—”

“Yes. I don’t know how, but my dad seems to have this ability to turn me into a seven-year old all over again. How does he still have this affect on me, Judd? I mean, I’m twenty-fucking-seven years old. It’s pathetic.”

“That’s a load of crap, and you know it.”

TK scoffs at him and turns away, but Judd has had enough of this, and maybe he understands now why Carlos called him. He’s not afraid to tell TK a few hard truths if he thinks it’s necessary, in a way that Carlos never could, partly because the guy’s just too damn nice even without being his boyfriend.

Not Judd, though.

“You have every right to be mad at your daddy right now, and I get the feeling that this is about more than the damn fire. I ain’t gonna sugar-coat it for you; he fucked up. I was there that night when he finally figured out it was you two Raymond was gunning for, and he admitted himself that he thought the firehouse was a diversion yet it still took a while for him to connect the most important thing in his life to you.

“In fact, it was almost Billy who worked it out for him. Bet you didn’t know that, huh? And I have to say, I’m a little mad at him for that, too, so I can’t imagine what you’re feeling. So this isn’t pathetic, but you know what is? You coming out here and moping instead of saying it to his face. You said it yourself, TK, you’re an adult; you’re not that snot-nosed seven-year old kid anymore, so maybe you need to start acting like an adult and stand up to him.”

Judd is breathing hard by the end of his speech, and he’s kind of proud of it. He thinks he’s made his point, but then TK just sighs and stares down at the ground, resignation on his face.

“You think I haven’t tried?” he asks, voice sounding heavier than it has any right to. “Last year after I got shot, I tried talking to him about how I felt after 9/11, but he blew me off. Of course I don’t want him to apologise for doing what he did, but I just want him to acknowledge that he wasn’t the father I needed him to be. But that’s never gonna happen, and, honestly? I’m not surprised he didn’t realise we were the target. That’s just how he is, and I’m done trying to change it. I’m tired, Judd.”

And Judd… Judd doesn’t know what to say. When TK and Owen first got to Austin, they always seemed so close; of course, since getting to know them, Judd has seen the cracks in their relationship, but he never…

That exhaustion in TK’s voice, in his face, in his entire being—Judd had never realised that things were that bad. He knows that nothing he can say will fix the way TK feels or will magically get Owen to apologise, and maybe there’s nothing anyone can do that won’t end in more resentment or guilt.

But Judd can be there for TK. He wraps an arm around his shoulders and tugs him close, gently kissing the top of his head.

“I’m sorry about all that,” he says, patting TK’s knee with his free hand. “But he ain’t the only family you’ve got now. You’ve got me, and you know I’ll always tell it to you straight, alright? And there’s Gracie, and the rest of the team, and that boy of yours in there is chomping at the bit to help you out.

“But you’ve gotta let us in. You keep bottling stuff up like this, it’s only gonna end ugly, so next time you feel bad, talk to one of us. Anyone. Don’t let your daddy’s actions ruin things for you.”

“Easier said than done,” TK says wryly, but his eyes shine with gratitude, and something that looks suspiciously like tears. “Thanks, Judd.”

“Anytime, kid.”

[911lonestarangstweek]

Falling Through a Bleeding Trapdoor

Fandom: 9-1-1 Lone Star

Relationship: TK&Tommy&Nancy

Rating: Teen

WC: 2.5k  

Written for @911lonestarangstweek Round 2

Prompt: Day 8 – T – TK&Tommy + Trapdoor

Summary: EMS 126 get sent to treat a man who slipped and hit his head, and Tommy and TK inadvertently stumble upon a crime scene.

Tommy watches Nancy press her fingers to the side of the ambulance where Tim's name is painted, a gesture that Tommy isn’t sure whether is for luck or just a way of remembering her deceased friend. Either way, she’s noticed Nancy doing it ever since the ambulance was renamed.

Read on ao3

[911lonestarangstweek]

quédate un segundo más (1/8)

@911lonestarangstweek day 8 - t is for...tumour, terminal, treatment

title from voy a quedarme by blas cantó, translates roughly to 'stay a second more'

thanks to @halsteadmarchs and @tarlos-spain for the beta!

as shown above, this will be eight chapters if all goes to plan, and i hope to finish it before season 3 begins. much of what is written both in this chapter and in future ones is ripped directly from life and i am only writing from my own perspective and experiences of losing a loved one to cancer.

ao3 | 1.6k | angst, hurt tk, cancer, terminal illness, more warnings to come in future chapters

A rare genetic mutation.

That’s what the doctors tell him when the results come back.

A rare genetic mutation that has rendered his cancer practically undetectable until its latest stages, until all that’s left to do is wait to die.

TK’s hands shake as various leaflets on Managing Your Diagnosis and What To Expect and Looking After Someone With Cancer are placed in them. He feels two steps to the side of himself, his entire world halting in its tracks the moment those words had left the doctor’s lips.

“I’m afraid it’s not good news,” he’d said, eyes wide and empathetic. “Your scans and blood results have come back showing evidence of a tumour on your pancreas. There are treatment options which we can and will—with your consent—pursue, however I have to inform you that your cancer is entering stage IV. It has begun to spread to your bladder and liver. I’m sorry to say that, at this point, treatment is more focused on managing your pain and making you as comfortable as possible; we do not anticipate recovery.”

It’s just… TK’s fine. He feels fine. Like, sure, he’s been a little more tired recently and he’s been getting these weird pains, but they always fade after a while, and he’s fine.

But he couldn’t deny the blood spotting his pee, the last straw which had finally sent him to the doctor’s office.

Too late, apparently.

A touch on his knee brings him back to reality with a start. TK looks up to meet the doctor’s kind gaze, and he wants to cry.

“I understand this is a lot to take in,” he’s saying. “If you have any questions, please ask.”

“I…” TK shakes his head, swallowing a couple of times before dropping his eyes to his knees, the words on the pamphlets blurred through his tears. “How long?”

The doctor hesitates a moment, then sighs regretfully. “I can’t say for certain. People frequently outlive their projected timeframes; equally, it could be less. However, given the way your tumour looks and the rate it appears to be spreading at, I would estimate around six months.”

Six months.

Six—six months.

“Oh,” TK says, and it feels wildly insufficient but it’s all he has. What even is there to say? He’s dying, and that’s...that’s that.

“Do you have a support system in place?” the doctor asks. “This is going to be a difficult process, and you are going to need other people to help you through it.”

TK nods slowly, not looking up. “M-My husband. Carlos. He was supposed to come with me today but he was called into work last minute. He’s a detective, so he couldn’t exactly refuse—not that that stopped him from trying.” He laughs wetly, remembering how he’d insisted that everything would be fine when Carlos had stalled leaving this morning. “And there’s my dad, and my team—my family. I’m a paramedic and I work in a fire station, so we’re all pretty close. I… Shit, I’m sorry. You don’t need to know all this.”

“It’s okay.” The doctor is still smiling, still so understanding, and TK wonders—just how many times has he had to do this? “I’m glad to hear you have solid support behind you; that’s going to be incredibly important for the coming months. I’ve also given you a few leaflets about support groups you can access, that your family can access, and, of course, your treatment team will be there every step of the way.

“Now,” he continues, returning to a semi-professional aspect, “I want to see you later this week to iron out how we’re going to proceed. For now, why don’t you go home and rest, allow yourself to process this? Does Friday at 10.30 work for your next appointment?”

TK nods absently, clutching the pamphlets tight enough to crease them. “That’s fine,” he whispers.

“Okay,” the doctor says, just as quiet. “Are you going to be okay to get home?”

“Yeah.”

But he doesn’t move. He can’t. In this room, he’s separated from the rest of the world—TK doesn’t want to go back into it, where he’ll have to tell everyone he loves that he’s… That he…

“TK.”

TK’s head snaps up at the doctor’s voice and he flushes a little at seeing his pointed look. “Sorry,” he mutters, scrambling to stand up.

The doctor stands too, much more gracefully than TK, and gets the door for him. “It’s okay. I’ll see you on Friday, TK, alright?”

He mumbles an affirmative then steps out of the office, taken aback for a moment by the bustle and noise in the corridor. It’s strange to witness it now, to see all these people who don’t know him from Adam going about their lives, while his has, in the span of thirty minutes, completely crumbled.

TK takes a deep breath (and how many of those does he have left?) and joins the flow.

*

He’s home.

That’s… He doesn’t remember it. He must have unlocked the front door because the keys are in his hand and he’s standing in the entryway, but TK has no idea how he managed to get from the doctor’s office to here.

He made good time though, judging by the clock on the wall.

Small victories.

With heavy steps, TK walks to the sofa, easing himself down and tipping his head back to stare at the ceiling. It still doesn’t feel real that there's this—this thing inside him, growing and mutating and killing him. He’s not sure when it finally will.

Maybe in a few months, when his skin is sagging off his bones and his hair is gone and even the very act of breathing is a challenge.

Or maybe in a few hours, when Carlos comes home and TK has to break the news. TK can picture his face now, the way his ever-present smile will crack and break, the shock and hurt and grief that will take its place.

He thinks he understands his dad now.

TK closes his eyes and tries to clear his mind, just for a moment, of everything that’s happened today.

Which, as it turns out, is a mistake, because that’s when he remembers the letter that came for them yesterday and the phone call they’re going to make after dinner.

The phone call they were going to make after dinner.

TK wants to scream at the unfairness of it all. They’ve been waiting for that moment for so long, the moment in which they found out they were finally cleared to adopt a kid. And now…

Gone.

Carlos is going to be crushed.

As if the universe is reacting to that last thought, the door suddenly swings open, marking Carlos’s return from his impromptu shift. For a moment, TK panics. He’s not ready, dammit, he needs more time to plan and to figure it all out, how he feels and what he’s going to say, but—

But, in the end, it doesn’t matter. He could have had the most detailed and well-thought out plan in the world and it wouldn’t have mattered.

Because all it takes is one look at Carlos’s smile for TK to fall apart.

Carlos is by his side in an instant, gathering him in his arms and sliding to the floor with him when TK can no longer support himself on the couch. TK fists his hands in his husband’s shirt and cries into his neck, all the emotion that’s been slowly building all day exploding from him all at once.

“It’s okay, it’s okay,” Carlos shushes, which only makes TK cry harder, because how is he supposed to tell him that it’s not?

He shakes his head and clings onto him tighter, feeling Carlos do the same to him in return. TK’s always felt safe in his arms and it’s no different now; he thinks that, if he can just stay here forever, maybe things will turn out okay after all.

But the moment ends, as they tend to do. When TK’s sobs have run dry, Carlos carefully pulls back from him, his hands rising to cup his face and wipe the tears from his cheeks.

“Babe, what’s wrong?” he asks softly, so much worry in those damn eyes that it hurts. “Is it… Did the doctor say something? Are you okay?”

TK opens his mouth, but the words refuse to come out. All he manages is a wordless shake of the head, and even that turns Carlos’s expression into the picture of devastation. He can’t bear to look at it, so he wraps his arms around Carlos’s waist and leans into him again, resting his head on his chest.

Carlos holds him and presses a kiss to the top of his head. “We’ll get through it,” he promises. “Whatever it takes.”

And it turns out that he does have a few more tears left in him; TK squeezes his eyes shut and breathes out shakily as a couple of lone drops fall down his cheeks. “We can’t,” he whispers hoarsely. Carlos stiffens and shifts as if to look TK in the eyes, but TK doesn’t let him. If he has to look at Carlos, he doesn’t think he’ll have the courage to say it. He hesitates a moment longer, a huge lump forming in his throat, but eventually he manages it.

“It’s cancer,” he chokes out. “Stage IV. Incurable. They think… I’ve got six months.”

It’s like time stops.

They’re both motionless on the floor of their front room, neither saying anything, barely breathing as the weight of it settles between them.

TK doesn’t know how long it lasts for, but suddenly Carlos sobs and grips onto him with a bruising strength. Carlos’s body heaves and shakes with the force of his cries, and it’s TK’s turn to hold him as tears drip down Carlos’s cheeks into his hair.

And, in that moment, it becomes real.

[911lonestarangstweek]

Pinned Like a Butterfly

Fandom: 9-1-1 Lone Star   Relationship: Gen, Paul focused Rating: Teen WC: 2.4k   Written for @911lonestarangstweek Round 2     Prompt: Day 7 – P – Paul + Pinned

Summary: The 126 are clearing a burning warehouse when something explodes and in the resulting destruction, Paul gets pinned. Unable to free himself and being confronted by the arsonist, will his friends get to him in time before the fire engulfs the entire building?

Paul follows Marjan up the stairs of the burning warehouse to the second floor, moving quickly as they know they only have limited time to clear the building before they’ll need to pull back. They reach the landing and start by checking the two closest doors, the voices of the rest of the crew occasionally coming through the radios as they report in about their own findings and statuses.

Read on AO3