#i wasn’t gonna post it tbh but seeing it w my other drawing was too funny

[measlyscrapofseafood]

my rinzler drawings have range guys

[kscribbs]

Me: sees OC ask

Me: ok ok, reign it in, Dani

Me: does the exact opposite 🙃🙃🙃

Have fun with this, K! >:)

Melusine:

-🐁 Capybaras are friend-shaped. What shape does your OC have? -🌧️ What is the favorite thing for you OC to do on a rainy day? -👎 Is there someone your OC can’t stand, despite them being on the same side or sharing basic values? -🤝 Does your OC have someone they want at their side when they are scared? Who? -🪤 What is one thing that could be used to lure your OC into a trap? -🎒 If your OC had to pick three things of all their belongings to keep, which would they chose?

Sebastian:

-📚 Your OC has to improvise a 10 minute lecture about a topic of their choosing. What do they chose? -🐁 Capybaras are friend-shaped. What shape does your OC have?

Sebastian is like. SOO shaped to me. I cannot express this enough lmao.

Oh! and for Tintin, bc I think about her at least twice a week:

-🪄 Does your OC have any special powers? If so, are they normal in this OC’s universe?

Okay! So I can only apologise profusely for how terribly late this is! My decision to draw certain bits was… arguably a little imprudent, given just HOW rusty I am atm. But nevertheless, here we go!

Mel:

-🐁 Capybaras are friend-shaped. What shape does your OC have?

Puddle Jerry :)

And also Mermaid Man.

These two entities combined is what her soul looks like.

-🌧️ What is your OCs favourite thing to do on a rainy day?

Mel LOVES rain. It’s her absolute favourite weather. She’s never more content than when it’s raining. The torrential-...er (yup, that's a word) the better! Lil' lady takes after me, in that respect. Her fave thing to do when it's raining is go out and find a nice big puddle to wallow in :3

-👎 Is there someone your OC can’t stand, despite them being on the same side or sharing basic values?

She doesn’t get on particularly well with her aunt Pressyne, for reasons I’ll explore in-fic.

She HATES Matthew and would gladly unalive him, should the opportunity arise 😂

She also... doesn’t seem to like Scott all that much? And I have absolutely NO idea why, LOL. Just, every time they’re in a scene together she starts getting testy. She’s not a huge Christmas fan tbh, so maybe that’s it? Finds the whole thing a bit too twee. (I <3 Christmas, so idk what she's on about).

-🤝 Does your OC have someone they want at their side when they are scared? Who?

This is a really fun/interesting one, because it kind of depends on, like— at which point in her timeline the question is being asked? When Marthinus (her son) was still alive, I’d have said him, honestly. He was a really sweet, engaging little mans. Very bright, very funny. Mel also had a friend/confidant growing up who wasn’t all they seemed, but I’ll touch on that/them another time! Then we have Seb, who Mel adores but honestly, he’s a bit hopeless, even if his heart is in the right place.

Lucy is perhaps the biggest contender. 

(Will be posting this artwork in full, later on! Am much happier w Mel's design here, which was inspired by lmelodie's wonderful illos! (And I also really like Lucy's witchy turnout))

The older and more capable Luce gets, the more she assumes a sort of maternal role, where her bestie is concerned. 

And finally — perhaps surprisingly — we have Jack. 

I think it’s fairly clear from the end of Chap 3 that Mel and Jack actually like and respect each other a great deal, and this relationship only gets stronger as time goes on! I know I ham up the “frenemy” thing, but really it’s just friendship with a heck of a lot of banter. Mel comes to see Jack as a bit of a pillar, when things get Tough. And I’m gonna be throwing a spanner in the works at some point that will ultimately (re)define their dynamic for centuries to come.

(Mel IS going to meet and befriend Jacquie at some point, too. I'm just being incredibly careful about how I write that bc I wanna do le frosty bagel justice!)

 -🪤 What is one thing that could be used to lure your OC into a trap?

She’s fiercely loyal, so probably the threat of someone she loves/cares about getting hurt. Either that or copious amounts of dark chocolate. The really bitter kind. We’re talking 80% cocoa-plus, here (salted is even more tempting). 

-🎒 If your OC had to pick three things of all their belongings to keep, which would they chose?

The snuffbox under her bed, the portrait miniature of Marth and her cockle locket.

Sebastian:

-📚 Your OC has to improvise a 10 minute lecture about a topic of their choosing. What do they chose?

Something horrendously boring.

-🐁 Capybaras are friend-shaped. What shape does your OC have?

Moss from the IT Crowd. And also that scribble monster from Doctor Who (but wayyyy less angry; Seb's v affable). 

Tintin:

-🪄 Does your OC have any special powers? If so, are they normal in this OC’s universe?

So, this is kinda out of left field but she tames sea monsters, lmaooo. Yup. The below is part of a much larger artwork that I'm honestly enormously proud of, which doesn't happen often! So thank you so much, Dani, for inspiring me to do an art piece that reminded me of why I went to art school/decided to plunge myself into tremendous debt 😂😂

Anyway, yeah! She has a real gift for wrangling ungodly sea beasts! >:3 Like this dragon... type... thing(?) here. I'll be posting the artwork in its entirety v v soon!

She has her water magic too, ofc, being a water nymph/sprite(? I still haven't decided).

I'm really glad you asked about her bc she's been on rotation in my brain, too! As has Melior, who reminds we a lot of Wednesday Addams, lmao. Sooo... Tintin's exact opposite, basically.

TYSM, Dani 🥰🥰 I had a LOT of fun w these! Even if I did take an eon to get back to you (so sorry again)! 😂

[meltwonu]

8. “Like what you see?”

19. “Take off your clothes.”

48. “You’re so fucking hot when you’re mad.”

notes; idol!soonyoung x stylist!reader, mirror fucking, dirty talk, a little praise kink😗, softdom!soonyoung, oral(fem receiving)/fingering, also waiitttt this is hot😳🥴but u have to imagine 191227 kbs gayo soonyoung with the mesh shirt ykwim, i actually want to sew my own rendition of these green outfits tbh like the seamstress in me is so in love with the green shades and silver accents just *chefs kiss* maybe when i’m not lazy LOL, anyway!! Thank you for liking my long posts😭💕 jdkksfh I know I can’t shut up… This ‘drabble’ is 2200 words bc I got carried away dkjfsf ☠️ And thank you for requesting! Enjoy! 💕

“Take off your clothes.”

Soonyoung pretends to be scandalized; eyes wide and lips parted in an over dramatic gasp. “You didn’t even buy me dinner first~” He jokes, already slipping off his fluffy coat as you roll your eyes.

“Soonyoung, please. I need you to behave and help me pick out the clothes that’ll decide what the rest of the performance unit members will wear. I’m behind and I need to get hip hop unit’s clothes picked out after.” You let out an exasperated sigh, pulling the rack of clothes closer to the two of you as Soonyoung stands and faces the tall full length mirror.

He slides his shirt off, lips in a pout when you toss a silky button up his way. “You’re overworked and you need a break. When was the last time you slept?”

“Try this one first, please. And yes, I’m aware. It’s busy this time of the year, I have a lot of things to do and who knows if I’ll even sleep before the new year.” You say it jokingly, but the look in your eyes tell Soonyoung it might not all be in jest.

“You need a break, baby.”

“I know, okay? Just try this damn shirt on first and we can talk about that later.”

Soonyoung looks good in everything he tries on, but everything he’d tried on so far didn’t seem to have the look you were going for.

“I don’t know… I feel like these black suits are overdone and the uniforms just look too formal, y’know? Maybe we should go for something casual… Maybe more sexy?” You help Soonyoung out of a brocade blazer, tossing it onto the rack as you sigh. “I don’t know, Soonie… You look good in everything but I don’t know what’s the mood right now.”

Soonyoung laughs as he unbuttons the pressed black button up before he, himself, starts going through the rack of clothing. “I’m telling you, you’re overthinking this.” It goes quiet for a bit as he sifts through the rest; a small ‘ah ha!’ leaving his lips when he picks out a dark green velvet lined blazer with matching pants.

“There’s no shirt with this one?” He asks.

“There is, it’s---here.” You help him out, pulling the hanger with the mesh shirt out. “I--I wasn’t sure about this one since it’s gonna be cold. I can put a shirt under it if it’s... y’know.”

“Lemme try it on!”

He shoots you an eager smile; letting you do your job as you help him into the green ensemble.

Your throat goes dry once Soonyoung slips on the blazer and you can’t deny the way your body warms up at the sex appeal that Soonyoung naturaly exudes in the outfit.

“Like what you see?” He grins, doing a spin for you.

Fuck.

“Um--uh…” You’re at a loss for words, suddenly shy with the way Soonyoung shoots you a knowing smirk. “You just saw me with my shirt off so why are you shy now?” You don’t know how to explain it to him, but the mesh shirt that paired with the blazer gave the outfit a sense of flirtatiousness and sexiness without being completely bare.

Soonyoung’s eyes twinkle in a familiar way and you can only gulp knowing exactly where this was going.

“I think… You need to take that break right now.”

“F--fuck, Soonyoung don’t---don’t get the clothes d-dirty!” Whining, you place your hands on his clothed shoulders the second he drops to his knees; still dressed in the outfit as he rolls his eyes up at you.

“It’s fine, if anything it’s just a ‘lil dust. Now shut up and let me eat you out already.”

He had backed you up against the tall mirror, soft praises on his lips the entire time before he’d kissed you hard and slotted a leg between your own. Teasingly, he pressed his chest against your own; smirking when he saw the lust pooling in your eyes when you felt his, essentially, bare skin against your clothed chest. He knew the effect he had on you and it definitely hadn’t been the first time a fitting session ended with more clothes off than on.

Soonyoung pries your legs apart, leaning in and pushing your skirt up until it bunches up around your waist. “You really need a break, baby. When’s the last time I even got to eat you out, hmm?” He doesn’t give you much of a warning before he’s leaning in and licking at you through your panties; a soft moan on your lips at the feeling.

“Ugh, fuck, but it’s me that has to clean it, Soonyoung…” Muttering, you watch as he focuses on teasing you; flattening his tongue against your covered folds and the action has you grinding down onto his tongue, biting your lip at the way him not bothering to move your panties only intensifies the pleasure.

He lets you do as you please; your soft and quiet cries the only noise in the empty changing room. “Oh, Soonyoung…”

Smirking, he slightly pulls away as he brings his fingers up to pull your panties to the side. “I know, baby. Let me make you feel good.” You nod slightly, hazy eyes fluttering shut when you feel his tongue on your skin.

You let out a long groan, head thrown back into the mirror as Soonyoung drags his tongue from your entrance to your clit; flicking at the nub with the tip of his tongue. “Fuck, you’re--you’re such a tease…” You whine, to which he chuckles against your skin.

‘I could be worse,’ he thinks.

He drags his tongue down until he can dip it into your entrance, teasing you when he repeats the action over and over and you quickly find yourself wanting more than just his tongue.

“Fuck, I want m-more…”

Soonyoung takes pity, knowing that this was a much needed break for you. So he brings his fingers up to your folds, collecting the wetness on his index and middle finger as he looks up at you.

“This is cute and all but I do hope you remember we’re on a time crunch.” Grinning, he positions his soaked digits at your entrance before fully sheathing them inside of your tight warmth in one fluid movement. You cry out his name;  body on fire when he curls and scissors his digits just the way he knows you like it.

“Mm, I could eat you out all day. Get you up on that makeup table and eat you out little by little in between sets until your entire body is trembling.” Soonyoung pauses, thrusting his fingers into you hard. “You’d be so cute too, baby. Imagine your ‘lil pussy all wet for me, ready to take my cock after a loooong show. I’d bend you over the sofa and give you what you want. Fuck you nice ‘n good and make you come home with me so I can fuck you again while we get cleaned up in the shower. And you’d be so fuckin’ wet I bet I could slide my cock right into you, huh?”

Soonyoung’s words combined with the skillful flicks of his wrist are almost enough to throw you over the edge. 

But the two of you knew you wanted more.

“G-god, Soonyoung, please! I’m so---so wet you can fuck me n-now!” You harshly whisper; hips moving on their own to meet his hand. The said male smirks, licking his lips before he leans in once more to flick his tongue against your clit.

“You deserve it for working so hard~” He coos.

You’re not sure what it is, but Soonyoung has a fascination with mirrors. You don’t know if it’s because he has to watch himself so often in them, but he takes any chance he gets to fuck you in front of one.

Not that you’d complain.

“Palms flat against the mirror, baby.” You watch through the mirror as he shrugs off the jacket; tossing it haphazardly behind him as it falls to the ground in a lifeless heap. “Goddamn it, Soonyoung! I’m gonna have to dry clean that!”

He can only smirk, repositioning himself behind you as he meets your not-so threatening glare. “You’re so fucking hot when you’re mad. Remind me next time to rip something instead.”

Soonyoung undoes the button and zipper of his pants, shimmying his underwear down just enough for him to wrap a hand around his cock. He lets out a groan as he thrusts up into his palm; smearing the precum down his shaft as you squirm and wiggle your hips. “Soonyoung, please hurry…”

“Ah, guess you’re right. Wouldn’t want someone to walk in on us, would we?”

He moves your panties to the side and positions his cock at your entrance, already inching in before you can open your mouth again. “Oh? You really are soaking, baby.” Your tight warmth sucks him in deeper and when he meets no resistance, he fully bottoms out inside of you as you cry out.

“Fuck m-me, please! I can’t w-wait any longer!”

Soonyoung chuckles under his breath as he draws his hips back, “You’ve been workin’ so hard, baby. Don’t worry, I’ll take care of you.” He thrusts into you slowly; letting you feel every inch of his cock before he starts a moderately quick pace. “I wish we had more time but, ah, still so much work to do, huh?”

You nod shakily, eyes clamped shut as you focus on the feeling of Soonyoung’s skillful thrusts that are angled perfectly to tap your g-spot. “Ngh, I--y--yeah…”

“Baby, look at me when I’m speaking to you.”

Soonyoung’s voice is gentle and warm, yet firm. And more than enough for you to blink your hazy eyes open. “Suh---sorry…” You mewl.

His stare pierces through the mirror and you can’t deny how attractive Soonyoung looked fucking you in the mesh top that he hadn’t bothered to take off either.

“Ah, look at how cute you are falling apart on my cock. So fuckin’ pretty.” He grits his teeth, already feeling the pleasure building up in his body. “Mm, gonna make you finish up the rest of your workday with my cum inside of your cunt.”

You clench around his cock as you mentally imagine his cum pooling in your panties and soaking through the material while you still had to deal with the other members. “Please… Soonyoung… I--ah, wanna g-go home with your c-cum dripping, mmh, down my t-thighs…”

He lets out a whistle, shaking his head slightly before he laughs. “Since you said please. Touch your clit for me, baby.”

Reaching a hand down, you use your index and middle finger to rub soft circles on the swollen nub; moaning into the mirror and fogging it up as you tighten up around his cock.

“Fuck, baby, I don’t think I’m gonna last much longer…” He mutters.

You can only nod and work your hips back to meet his own thrusts, “M-me too…” You hear him groan before he doubles his pace, fucking into you faster as you feel your body shifting more and more towards the mirror. You rest the side of your face against it, breath fogging it up as the two of you chase your orgasms.

Neither of you know how much time is left in the fitting session, but you really hoped nobody walked in on you slumped against the mirror with your skirt bunched around your waist and Soonyoung with his cock out.

“Cum on my cock, baby. Get it nice ‘n wet before I fill you up.”

You work your fingers quicker on your clit, this time alternating between pinching the nub and rubbing harsher circles to throw yourself over the edge.

“Oh, S---Soonyoung, ‘m c-cumming!”

It only takes a few more perfectly angled thrusts before your orgasm washes over you and Soonyoung’s name rolls off your tongue in a hurried, jumbled mess and through the haze, you can vaguely hear Soonyoung’s groans as he follows suit; hips stuttering and losing rhythm. 

You moan at the feeling of his cock throbbing inside of you just as he moans at the feeling of your walls fluttering and tightening around him; the two of you slowing down your movements as you let the warmth wash over your already heated bodies.

“Fuck…” He mutters.

A sheen of sweat covers his brow and he’s quick to run a hand through his hair as he watches your body tremble underneath him. He chuckles under his breath; letting the remnants of his orgasm ebb away before he’s slowly easing his cock out of you.

You moan at the emptiness and your sticky hand quickly finds purchase on the mirror again to keep yourself upright. Your panties slide back into place like they’d never been moved and you bite your bottom lip when you already start to feel his cum soaking into the fabric.

“Ngh, Soonyoung… I feel… s-sticky… and we---we need to c-clean up...”

The said male is three seconds from laughing when there’s two sharp knocks on the door that have the both of you going rigid at the same time.

“Hey, um, our fitting sesh should’ve started 15 minutes ago. Just… letting you know. We’re... behind.”

Vernon’s shy and quiet voice pierces through the awkward silence and through the mirror you meet Soonyoung’s red cheeks and sheepish smile.

“Oopsies~”

[badfey]

is there anything u wish u had known pre-top surgery? I’m trying to schedule mine next yr and I’m worried I rushed into picking my surgeon even tho I looked at a Lot. I’ve got a list of questions to ask but curious if there’s anything you can think of! Thanks, if u get a chance to reply 🥺

firstly congrats and good luck with your top surgery, i hope the wait goes quickly!!

There were a lot of things i wasn’t expecting about top surgery - not necessarily that i wish i’d known in advance, just that i didn’t anticipate. I wrote a document of them not long after surgery which ill post soon and link back to here :) right now ill go through the main stuff i wish i had known, and any questions i had (under a cut because it got long)

Stuff I Wish I’d Known

Some of this depends on how your surgeon does things. I had 6 days before my post-op appointment w chest reveal. 

That first week is tough. Ymmv, but for me it was really hard. I knew that post-op depression was a thing, i didn’t realise what it would feel like. For me it was a lot of being tired and not being able to sleep because of not being able to get comfortable (having to sleep elevated for a few days & pain), so getting more tired and bored but too fatigued to do anything in that classic frustrating cycle. Once i slept decently for the first time i felt human again (nytol is a lifesaver). It’s also tough bc ur sweaty n uncomfortable and u haven’t showered or taken off the post-op binder for a week, and with the dressings and swelling it doesn’t feel like its really happened yet? After chest reveal thats a lot easier

Sometimes moving around you’ll feel something like pull or pop and you get so so paranoid about pulling a stitch i seriously thought id pulled a stitch but its usually like the dressings adhesion or something, you don’t need to freak out. My best friend here was this uk trans fb group because i could search and find years of posts with ppl having the same problems, or ask and ppl would give advice and calm me down, so it’s good to join a community like that ready for if you inevitably get stressed about something (also good for post-op boredom)

You cant use your arms to move. Sounds obvious but like i never realised how much i reflexively rely on using arms to move sitting positions on a bed, and how you need to pay attention to override that impulse. 

Peeing after anesthetic is weirdly hard. It really helps if you practise consciously releasing the specific muscles to pee beforehand 

I was so hungry. I got fed sure (great food too) but i wish i had taken snacks. 

Questions to ask

Im gonna list some stuff that you may already know/have on your list but it might help fill any gaps :) 

When are your post-ops? Are they included in the surgery price? Mine were at 6 days (chest reveal) and 8 weeks (normally 6 weeks but my surgeon was on holiday lol) and both included in the price of surgery (which is standard for here i think). Its good to have rough timeframes in advance so you can plan around it.

Ask about revisions - are they included in the price, what is the timeframe you can get revisions for, how you would start the revision process if you need it? Hopefully you won’t need it but its important to know just in case & so you don’t need to worry about it. I think my surgeon got a bit touchy when I brought up revisions but i was just clear that if I’m getting this surgery and paying a lot of money for it i need to know this stuff in advance which as a professional he should be fine with.

Can you have a say in scar shape and/or nipple size? Usually you can, and this is often at the pre-op when they draw all over your chest before surgery. Don’t feel like you can't weigh in - this is your chest. Also even at consultation they might be able to give you an idea of what your scar/s will look like. 

If you’re getting nipple grafts, ask about their graft success rate!! I was super stressed about my nipples falling off, but my surgeon said that even though stats say about 10% of nipple grafts r unsuccessful, in practise he sees a much smaller percentage than that, and even ones that do reject often grow back (lmk if u wanna know more what i mean) or can just be easily touched up with tattooing. Also if theres anything they recommend for graft success.

Does your surgeon recommend using arnica? Arnica is a homeopathic remedy for bruising, swelling, and wound healing. There’s differing views on whether it actually works, but in my case i took arnica tablets 1 week before and 2 weeks post-op and i think it really helped. They also tasted nice. Some people use arnica gel to aid healing once you can start massaging. 

Where will you be for overnight recovery? Will you be on a ward or in a room? Do you have access to a TV? Do you have access to a plug socket or charging point? Do you get wifi? Chances are you’ll be bored at some point over the time you’re in there, especially if you struggle sleeping. It’s good to know whats available in advance so you can come with things to keep you entertained. 

Does your surgeon use drains? You probably already know/have an idea of this bc its something a lot of ppl consider when choosing surgeons, buts its good to know if you don’t. Also, it can change - I chose my surgeon partially because he only uses overnight drains so you don’t have to deal with them in recovery. When i was there i found out he has stopped using drains altogether for smaller guys so i never actually had them (pleasant surprise). 

Does your surgeon want you to wear a post-op binder? Do they supply the binder? Post-op binders r a good idea they stop swelling soo much, so even if your surgeon doesn’t recommend it i’d definitely ask if it’d be safe for you to wear one. You can't wear regular binders. If you’re sourcing your own, again trans groups r great bc they can give local recs and lots of people sell/pass on their old ones. I am happy to give anyone recs, but they’re all uk based. 

How will you communicate with nurses post-op? Most people don’t live too near their top surgeon, so you’ll probably check-up remotely. I just sent nurses emails of my nips and incisions and anything i was worried about the healing of and they’d let me know if it looked okay. 

If you have any conditions/disabilities/illnesses, ask if they’ve ever operated on someone with them/similar before. I have fibro + hypermobility and tbh it was reassuring to hear him talk about experiences other patients with chronic pain had had before and how they coped.

Okay sorry that was really long, but its pretty much everything i could think of question wise! I hope it helps! Let me know if there’s any other questions you have at all :)

[this-is-my-main-i-follow-from]

I already wrote this post, but I’m coming backk up to the top to put a cut bc it’s p long.

my brother is singing falsettos out loud & I’ve already had a stressful day bc I’ve done nothing (lack of structure & lack of productivity gives me really bad anxiety) & he’s either singing out of key & out of time, or it just sounds really bad without the music. He’s the only one who can hear the music bc HeadPhones. & also the falsettos is probably really bad for my mom bc she’s mad that dad left her, esp bc the house is a mess & stressing her out & she needs to go grocery shopping & he used to do that “but now he doesn’t because he stopped loving [her]”, so my bro singing fucking falsettos is really bad. I can’t cook supper bc I don’t have a recipe & the stuff is still frozen & idk what kind of dough I should make & besides the kitchen is a mess & he won’t fucking clean it. I mean it’s also partially my fault bc I’m a lazy adhd mofo, but it’s his job today & my job to cook. I need to get into the kitchen & cook before mom & my OTHER brother get home from shopping but I can’t bc he’s just drawing & singing & the singing is so annoying- I was trying to listen to a thing but I couldn’t fricking hear it bc adhd auditory processing disorders, it didn’t have fucking subtitles or anything & it was not great audio quality & I couldn’t differentiate between the words he was singing, & I couldn’t hear the quiet parts when they overlapped with his singing. I wasn’t going to write all of this I was just going to say that his singing makes me want to cut myself, but apparently there’s a lot more to it. also I don’t want to end up cooking while mom is home bc I don’t have any drawings on my arm & mom is fucking nosy & wants to see my scars so I have to work extra hard at hiding them but even with ppl who arent nosy, like my little bro I don’t like them out, but the longer my older bro sits there fucking yelling out of key, the longer I’m delayed & I won’t be able to cook. By this point, I won’t even be able to cook the meal I was planning on, I have so much shit to do I’ve missed so much & I’m so behind, but I’m so incapable of doing anything like i can’t do chores bc I use the excuse I have homework but I never fucking do my homework so I’m also behind in school & even with the stuff I like like dnd & writing & violin I can’t do, & I skipped online kung fu & I’ve been slacking off under so many excuses but I’m just being lazy & anxious & I also gained so much weight & it makes my body feel so bad & i know this isn’t my body’s happy weight & being fat makes my boobs bigger & I’m fucking trans & I hate them I even tried cutting them off myself & ended up waiting 15 hours to go to the hospital so that I wouldn’t make mom suspicious (& they put me through triage really fast bc apparently I did a lot of dammage- I was planning on giving myself stitches, but my icepack melted & I couldn’t numb my body anymore so they’re lucky I even went to the hospital, it was bad bc I had to walk 20 minutes either way weighted down with a fucking toolbox & I waited outside in the cold bc my phone died & thus:) mom found out anyways so I lied to her about going to buy drugs bc obv /that’s/ a better idea than telling her I went to the hospital & SHUT UP UNNAMED OLDER BROTHER ok he’s between songs now. If I told mom I went to the hospital she would ask why & be like “y didn’t u tell me” & “r u cutting urself again” & like yeah bitch I have been for a while ik the social worker said I should tell you a codeword, but I don’t do that bc u blame yourself or cry or want to talk about & I yes I fucking cut myself what of it? Yeah I tried fucking removing my own left breast, bc u arent’ supportive of medical transitioning, at least not when they’re ur kids. Ur mad at dad bc he got a tattoo bc it’s  body modification & thus uncatholic, but u’ll support ur catholic university friends gettin gtheir eldest daughter a reduction bc her boobs are big & painful- bitch what’s so different about me? I went so far as to try giving myself a reduction, you say you’re concerned about me mutilating my body & making bad decisions, but, you know what? because of this I have legitimately mutilated my body, & made a dangerous & bad decision. isn’t autosurgery proof that I need top surgery bc it’s a danger to my life if I don’t get it? The government is able to pay for it I think & bc it’s a danger to my health (& i get pain & I can’t work out & I get back pain & my skin pulls & hurts & if I jump my tissues yank my skin & it hurts & it puts so much strain on my back, & binding gives me pain, so I need a reduction as much as your catholic university friends’ daughter does) I should be abe to qualify. Even if I don’t qualify yet & have to wait two years, at least that would be the start of two years now instead of in a long time, I mean, mum, you say you want me to talk about it & you’re afraid I’m rushing into it? guess what? They are too! the healthcare system will make me do a bunch of shit to qualify, & tbh, I think that they are better qualified to talk to me about surgery & what I really want than you.  Fucking finally, I hope my brother is done his play & finally shuts up. TA MA DE FUCK NO HE’S STARTING AGAIN CROWS DAMN IT CROWS CROWS CROWS & MAGGOTS I”m not even gonna be able to make anythiung for supper & i have no ideas besides the long one which I don’t have time for anymore. fine. whatever. I’ll go SH in my room. I won’t even work on fanfic bc I’m too fucking adhd & broken. I fucking hate it when ppl say “we;re all a bit adhd” like no bitch shut the fuck up, we all struggle with the things adhd ppl struggle with sometimes, but adhd is a neurological condition that makes those struggles so commonplace & intense that it affects our everyday lives. & no. adhd does not mean we’re more creative. Even if we do have more likeliihood of coming up with funky ideas, most of us struggle to articulate them or understand them, or we forget them as soon as they come. you’re not adhd bc you’re a little more creative, youre just an ableist asshole & fuck you. adhd isn’t creativity its’ a fucking disability. I’m directing this at those fucking parents who have the lovely nd daughter who gave me a hug, but you two are motherfuckers. Yeah I get thaat adhd, once you learn how to mannage it, can be useful, & I understand that part of the reason this disability is so hard is bc society isn’t designed for it (like a lefty using right hand scissors), but ot’s still fuxking REAL & if you can’t deal with it yet, it 100% is a disanbility. OK? Ok. I had smth I was going to say earlier, but I got distracted by smth else that made me mad, so I never got around to it. Youo know what I love? I fucking love how tumblr has next to no character limit so I can just type as much as I want. You know what I don’t like? I’ll probably get deactivated by some SJW maggot-eaten crow-fucker who thinks that my rant& mentioning my failed ed & my self harm (oh fuck shut up, my brother is chanting “dumb”) so anyways some fucking sjw fuck-hole will report this post & my blog & I’ll be deactivated for simply getting angry on tumblr. It’s fucking tumblr! You used to be able to say whatever you needed to say! But now, esp us ppl w EDs, have no safe place to talk about our issues (at least, not w/o fear of gettin gterminated for “encouraging” EDs, when we’re just trying to help ourselves). Anywasy, sorry for all the swears & go se, I swear when I’m mad. I’m gonna go do smth, idk what. Can’t be anything productive, Can’t even be unproductive stuff I like, like watching youtubem, or smth cathartic like playing fiddle. I might just go & bleed a bit & ignore everything for a while. I nkow that the world will still be stressful when I get back, & I’ll still have to cook, & I’ll still be behind in school, & mom will still be broken-hearted over dad, but I’m feeling calmer just thinking about it so that’s what I’ll do. 

[stickmolus]

don’t mind the silly outfit, i got really into blaseball and i can draw my fursona in team merch if i want. (park it, garages!) anyway:

so, uh, i didnt actually expect to have to make this post? i got a couple asks and was like, okay, i understand people being mad-- charles is my comfort character, for example, so i get pretty unhappy seeing him get dealt a bad hand in fics. figured i could just handle it in-character once i got the opportunity to.

and then i got a few more asks and went “uh, okay” because apparently i do need to clear things up ooc after all, whoops.

okay so, reginald. i joke a lot about hating him, which was pretty sincere when i first played stickmin, but tbh ive started to warm up to him after seeing what the fandom does with him and getting a chance to write him for stickmolus. the thing is, uh... i like reginald as a villain. i like examining his motivations behind TB, and how that carries over into other endings like TCW and R. i also think its neat how henry can earn his respect in T4L and TK, and how that factors into how he sees henry in other paths. theres a lot of potential!

also, out of the 3 “bad endings” (TCW, VH, R), R is probably my favourite. theres a lot of character motivations that go into it, a lot of mistakes that get made on both sides, and the ending really hits hard in a way different from the other two. thats also why the first animation meme ive done w/ stickmolus was R! and, like, something i like to do with writing characters is to definitely take them apart and examine why things happen, why they make the choices they do, how they ended up like this. that’s what made writing reginald very fun, because i got to go into his viewpoints of the whole thing and his justifications for what he’s done.

i cant actually go into reg’s motivations too much here because there’s still more to get uncovered on the blog itself, but... yall, reg is an asshole in R. im sorry. he’s gonna be in more favourable lights in other routes, but the reg you were interacting with did kinda straight up commit an assassination and lied about it to you guys. he’s not being controlled (??????), he wasn’t panicking / made a mistake (when it comes to TB anyway. he definitely was in RPE.), him murdering henry was a choice he made and he did, in fact, say why-- just in, like, really vague terms, bc of the whole “not wanting to admit to murder to strangers” thing.

sorry for this block of words, but i just really didnt fancy getting yelled at in my inbox anymore.

[curechocolattymilk]

I can't seem to draw today so the Skyrim fandom will have to deal about my ramblings about my Argonian lad Jeer-Tei:

-Tei's exact memory of their past is fuzzy at best, partially due to the Inigo incident & partially due to other events. He doesn't act like it bothers him it does sometimes

-Debating if Tei has any connection to the Hist tbh?? I have it in mind where he wasn't raised in Black Marsh, adopted by a single father who worked p much as a mercenary.

-They don't express, or speak, a lot. When they do, 8/10 times it's to intimidate, insult, or, if you pissed them off or challenged em, to brawl. Tei can come off very apathetic, seeming only to help others if the pay is well/he can hold a debt over them. Which is...not entirely untrue. They do have a bit of a heart though, not all the missions he does are out of greed.

-Tei opens up eventually to a select group of people (Rumarin was actually the first to get a full convo out of them), though it may not seem so to an outsiders perspective. He's very blunt n gruff with others, always having a snide comment or two, but with the few he lets his walls down around, it's obviously lighthearted & has no cruelness behind it. If you really want to see him put down his walls w/o trying to befriend him, see him with his kids/around kids. As much of a gruff bastard they are, Tei always seems to make time to play a game or help with studies. (Being cruel to children is probably the fastest way to get on his shitlist)

-Buut that doesn't take away from the fact that Jeer-Tei is a of a bit power-hungry arse. He'll become a champion for Daedra no problem if it gives him an advantage (the only two Princes he seems to actually respect are Mora & Hircine however), if you offer him a position of power as a reward there's a high chance he's taking it, that sort of deal. Hell he wants to unlock full potential & be a dragon one day if able, or just storm through powerful positions in the Empire, to dominate is in the nature of the Dovah after all.

-Speaking of Dovah, Tei's soul isn't exactly seperate from him. It's there, they acknowledge it, but the two don't really conflict, if anything they kinda just merge to keep the flesh suit they call a body safe & not dead. The soul also has memory issues, because why not, it remembers being a powerful Dovah, but after being slain? Not much else. Until becoming a part of Tei, it felt as if it was floating on, losing its identity, to the point where it does not know its original name. With Tei learning the dragon language though, the two occasionally bicker amongst themselves if it should be Kaaljooraav (Champion, Mortal, Union) or Kaaljoordaan (Champion, Mortal, Doom/Fate)

-probably noted in the few screenshots I posted but Tei is married to both Rumarin & Kaidan. Tei & Ru were together first, married not too long before Gren's rebellion. They met Kaidan a bit after Alduin's defeat, & Tei butted heads with the man right away lol. Ru, or Inigo if he was travelling with them, was often the one to diffuse tension between the two during the first few adventures. But eventually the three became close friends, then an open relationship (Tei took initiative in this case, both he & Ru discussed it before hand) before all coming to the decision to get hitched, again in the Argonian & Altmer's case. Tei n Ru's kids, Ram-ku & Chases-Starlight, were ecstatic that they were gonna have 3 dads that'll spoil them.

-Speaking of spoiled, Tei spoils Shadowmere tons. Sure his teeth are rather pointed for a horse, suure they took a chunk out of a bandits corpse while the group was looting. And yeah, she gives Rumarin & Kaidan the stink eye when Tei focuses on those two & might try & steal a finger; but that horse is his baby. And ain't NOBODY finna touch em

[sunsetsover]

i'm so sorry about the election result, it's pure shite :( for headcanons/fics, god PLS do either mama highway coming back oR callum and lexi x

don’t be sorry, it’s not your fault :-( it’s david cameron’s fault.  he literally started this whole shit storm and now he’s pissed off somewhere meanwhile the rest of the country is fucked lmao danny dyer was RIGHT

i would love to talk abt mama highway tbh but i feel like in order to do the subject justice i’d have to really sit down and go back to see what callum/stuart/j*nno have said abt her in the past bc i remember little bits (like didn’t callum talk abt getting a valentine’s card from her last year? but then stuart told whitney that they hadn’t spoken to her in years? so did they retcon that out? idk i have Questions) but i probably don’t remember loads so maybe i’ll come back to her another time and do a proper post abt it. but i do really hope she comes into the picture at some point in the future bc i think it would provide some really good conflict for callum (like just imagine the undeniable anger he’d feel towards her for leaving him with j*nno vs his desire to have a mum and some semblance of his own family... trying to figure out if he wants her around and if can forgive her or if he even WANTS to forgive her... like what if callum wanted to forgive her but stuart wanted nothing to do with her and it caused a rift between them? there’s so much the writers could do w that and it would be so GOOD) and some much needed background/history for callum and stuart. like there’s so much missing there bc none of the highways have really spoken abt her or what happened at all so all we really know is that she left and has (assuming the valentine’s thing has been reconned) never really had anything to do w her sons... but like why did she leave? WHEN did she leave? did she go bc j*nno was an alcoholic and scumbag, or did her leaving make him like that? did she leave for good and basically have nothing to do with any of them, or was she still a mother to them initially? did she try to take them with her, or was she happy to leave them behind and live her own life? does she have other kids now? like??? there is SO much there and it would be so good to explore and it would be so much fun to write.... @ ee hire me

(also lmao i said i wasn’t gonna talk much abt her but look.... i just can’t help myself apparently)

but callum and lexi... god their relationship really is so sweet and i am especially emo abt it today.... i just think it’s so interesting how ben having a kid has never ONCE been a problem for callum like he embraced her straight away and is more than happy to be a part of lexi’s life and god yeah i just love them sm

here are some headcanons for ur enjoyment (i’m sorry i didn’t write u a fic but i do have a lot of callum/lexi in the fics i’m gonna be posting soon so i hope ur not too disappointed 🥺️):

callum is really nervous initially to spend time lexi outside of like normal everyday stuff - like taking her to school, for example, or being around during her bed time. it’s not that he doesn’t like her or doesn’t want to be there, he just doesn’t want to impose. and he worries that he is imposing by doing stuff like that, or maybe she didn’t actually want him there - or around at all - and is just too polite to say. ben assures him, when callum tells him that, that if lexi hadn’t wanted him around she would definitely not have a problem letting everyone know. callum had appreciated him saying that, but didn’t believe him until one day when he was stood in the school playground with ben waiting to pick her up, and she had burst out of the building and went straight for callum, eager to show him the picture she had drawn for him during lunch, when they’d been kept inside because of the weather. ‘oh that’s nice, innit?’ ben had said, feigning insult, ‘you draw a picture for callum, but you don’t draw one for your own dad?’

they bickered playfully while callum had just stared at the picture, a little bit confused as to what it was he was looking at, but appreciative of it all the same. it even had ‘to callum’ in spiky, childish letters written in the top corner.

he turns back into the conversation just in time to catch ben saying ‘no, you can hold callum’s hand if you like him so much’, to which lexi whines and tries to pull ben’s arms away from his chest where he’d crossed them tightly so she can take his hand. he caves a moment later, lifting her up and throwing her over his shoulder and running off with her. a few other parents look over when they hear the commotion - lexi is half laughing, half screaming, and ben is tickling her sides, growling something that sounds like ‘you’re my baby, mine’ - but ben doesn’t even seem to notice. he just stops by the gate, looking back at callum, waiting for him to catch up.

the picture goes straight on his fridge as soon as he gets home. he doesn’t doubt what ben tells him about lexi ever again.

the first time callum and lexi spend proper time alone together, it’s the school holidays and ben is ill at home, and lexi is going a little stir crazy being stuck in the house, which really isn’t helping ben feel any better, but no one else can look after her bc they’re at work or out. so callum offers to take her out for a little while, get her out of ben’s hair so he can rest. he’s never seen ben so grateful.

they only go to the park, but lexi seems excited anyway - holds his hand on the way there without him having to ask, doesn’t wonder too far away from him. he pushes her on the swings for a little while then sits off a ways to watch her play with the other kids at the playground. 

at one point she trips and falls while running and callum absolutely freaks out bc she’s scraped up her knees and palms, but lexi bothered at all. she doesn’t even cry. in fact she’s already stood herself back up by the time callum gets to her, dusting the gravel off her raw knees and palms. she even makes to run off again - callum has to stop her so he can take her somewhere and get her cleaned up.

he’s still freaking out, so he takes her to the pub, figuring mick would know what to do. mick, much to his dismay, laughs when he sees the state callum is in about the whole thing (compared to lexi, who is very much over it), and pulls out a first aid kit for him to use. callum sits her on the bar, and lexi chats to mick about what they’d been doing as callum cleans the dirt off her scrapes, then slathers them in antiseptic cream and carefully puts plasters on both of her knees. he honestly thinks he’d been less stressed dealing with literal war wounds.

callum orders her a lemonade and a packet of crisps out of sheer guilt, which makes mick shoot him a look that screams ‘soft touch’ even as he pulls out a glass and starts filling it. then, as callum passes money to him across the bar, he can’t help but ask mick ‘what am i gonna tell ben and lola? they’re gonna kill me’. mick just laughs. ‘they’re not gonna kill ya. she tripped and scraped her knees, halfway; she’s a kid, these things happen.’ and then he’d passed him his change, and they’d both looked at her, drinking too fast through a straw, kicking her legs against the bar from her stool. ‘look at her,’ mick had said, ‘she’s absolutely fine, ain’t ya?’ and lexi had just smiled around her straw and nodded.

(for the record, ben and lola had not killed him when they had found out. in fact, lola had laughed nearly as hard as mick had when she’d seen how guilty he felt.)

less specific but lexi loving to sit on callum’s shoulders bc he’s so mf tall that she feels like a giant

lexi inviting him to come see her in her school play and callum getting embarrassingly emotional about it

callum being the ONLY ONE who can make her eat her vegetables........ like she will only willingly eat them if she knows callum has cooked them.... it’s actually a bit of a problem bc now she won’t ever eat vegetables anymore....

ben coming home to find lexi AND callum sat on the floor colouring, so immersed they don’t even realize he’s there

callum and lexi being the early risers in the house so most weekends they’ll end up sitting on the couch, sharing a blanket and watching cartoons in the morning while they wait for everyone else to get up

i could literally talk abt callum and lexi all day but i’ll stop there bc this post is long enough as it is but just know i Love Them

💖💖💖

[abloomingperiod]

junmyeon as a bf

the softest of the softies

kim junmyeon is an old-fashioned guy

and i’m not saying that in terms of being conservative or anything, ‘cuz i really hope he isn’t

i mean in the sense of love

like you know that kind of person who dreams the whole picture

like

he dates for a reason

unlike other members, junmyeon isn’t the type to not think about the future

being a leader makes you like that

but this gets less harsh on him when u arrive in his life

yk that whole romantic comedy movie where a guy runs into someone and it’s this beautiful woman with the biggest smile and they fall for each other and shit

well.......not exactly your case

he indeed ran into you with an iced tea in hands

except you didn’t smile at him

you basically screamed “SHIT IM SORRY ILL PAY U BACK”

he got so flustered w your reaction like

this really pretty girl just offered me some iced tea”

he was all like nonononononoooo don’t say that it’s fine don’t worry aha

you kept insisting but were late for work so you made him promise to come back to that bakery the day after bcs he WOULD be paid back no matter wHAT

he didn’t feel the need butyou were cute and he wasn’t with a thick schedule so why not right

so yeah ofc prince suho showed up

the next day he entered the place and saw you

you were so pretty watching you crinkling your nose over the hot coffee in your hands was already a payback

a cute one

cmon he’s cringey give him a chance

you bowed at each other and he realized you didn’t mention for Once between the whole minute after the accident and his arrival abt his name or profession as an idol

which for him

was nice

not a big deal, but nice

after you gave him his iced tea he was so polite you actually smiled bcs ajshskjsks cute ?

and then you started talking for a while

you introduced yourself, told him abt your dream to become a writer someday and he !!!!!

okay junmyeon easy on the hearbeats you got it

he just thought of this as such a COOL dream

writing for a living

now he was like this pretty girl... is a poet

i know

lame

but he’s adorable so who cares tbh

he talked to u abt being an idol and how was the position of the leader

you listened to every word and even though you lost a fee of them along with the honey like voice and puffy cheeks of his, you loved hearing abt it

after like 2 hours he had to go bcs schedule

but before you parted your way you had to go to the bathroom

when you went pay for your payback iced tea, you hear a waiter asking “mrs y/n? i believe that for you”

no shit there was the waiter holding a cappuccino

you got like Dude. there must’ve been a mist-

you turn the cup and there it is:

“for y/n

i loved the iced tea but since my goodbyes were a little earlier i most definitely own you a payback too. how abt sushi? xx” and the waiter hands you a note with his name and number

and that’s how you started seeing each other

jun is a quiet person so he won’t be like vocal abt developing a crush on you more and more

it would b like

you guys would hang out sometimes

and little by little he would catch himself getting the heart eyes

like you’re at a coffe shop

you would get passionate talking about some movie or song and suddenly there’s a drop of coffee on the side of your lip. you didn’t notice but he did but he thought you looked so cute popping off about ur favorite music he would just sit there like,,, 💖nvm💖

and with those little stuff he would catch himself thinking yup they’re gonna b mine

so one day he went like soooo maybe i’m catching feelings i didn’t know this was happening sorry??? so i think u should know that bcs it’s abt u... i’m fancied by u i didn’t mean it to happen

like straight up he APOLOGIZED

FOR LIKING U

you were like goshkjsjksj so cute

and decided to play w him a little

“so you don’t want to like me” “NONONOOO THATS NOT WHAT I MEA-” “jk i got it i really like you too and maybe we could kiss to see what happens”

he combusted

so yeah you’re dating that’s what happened

so caring literally sO CARING

calls you on a daily basis when he’s away to talk abt the weather the boys his breakfast how much he misses you how he saw those flowers outside and it reminded of you or how he will bring you to that country when it’s vacations

he’s such a husband material fuck me

keeps notes of things you like so he can hit the high score on important dates

talking abt dates

fancy

i mean he’s bourgeoisie ofc it’s fancy

such a lovely boyfriend i’m actually sad

jun is restaurants with low lights, candles, roses and holding your hand while talking about how he never seemed to figure out the food app to find a cool place to go to so he just asked chanyeol with a pout on his lips

“you’re such an old man” “i’m simple it’s different”

on your 1 year anniversary he took you to a boat ride on a lake witha guy playing violin and wine and cheese waiting for you

simple my ass

keeps bringing coffee and flowers for you every friday night you get together bcs it’s your “tiny vacations” as he calls it

on weekends with you the only ppl he answers is either manager or a serious question from the boys/his family

and it’s always a short “yes” or “no” or “👍🏻”

fuck it he’s with his baby leave him alone

loves cooking with you

like fuck it if it’s not that tasty he just LUUUVES doing it with you

probably because he gets to hug you a lot

like you’re in the stove and he had already placed everything in its own place so he goes behind your figure, hugs your waist and places his lips on your shoulder to give you tiny pecks and praise your cooking

“junmy this is practically burnt” “you’re the best cooker i know”

once you guys were enjoying a whole ass week together and the last time you were together for more than a day were like 6 months before

you were so all over each other he went to do the same thing and you guys ended up making out in front of a precooked pan of french fries

long story short, your toasted it and only saw that coming bcs jun went to embrace your waist and his fingers touched the hot pan

“that happened bcs of you and your teenager behavior” “YOU COULD’VE MOVED” “I WAS TRAPPED”

so guess what you did after you applied some salve om his fingers

he was staring @ u all 💖💖💖💖💖

you were like ,,,what

he just shrugged and murmured “you’re beautiful”

that’s right

you fucked

not fucked in a Fucked way

yall made love

kim junmyeon is all about luv

i remember someone posting here that he probably fucked like white people and i-

that person ruined it for me

i hate yall

i will defend him till the end of time my boi DOES NOT fuck like a white person

takes it very seriously as he sees it as an opportunity to shower u with the love u deserve

on that day you actually convinced him you should do the hard work

HELL YEAH YOU RODE THAT BITCH

jun seems like soft dom for me like just bcs he’s in charge for most of the time doesn’t mean youon get to do a thing

that time as you rode him you got very like Very excited but you saw in his eyes how desperate he was to touch you entirely so you catch his hand and kiss his fingertips slowly

he kept smiling for you saying “god you are so beautiful” “i love you so much”

but you’re a little shit and always tries and bring his rough side out

so you open your mouth and lick his two burnt finger from the knuckles to the tips

he got so !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

not really a vocal guy

heavy sighs and low groans are it for junmyeon

very into dirty talk

but a fancy one

“does my baby likes it when i make her beg?” “look at me, love. do you want it from where i can kiss your back or your breasts?” “you’re mine to take and no one else”

we don’t support women treated as objects but this is a sexual environment and you’ve always consented him to say things like that in bed

he’s a gentlemen fuck it

once you were so horny you straight up said “i don’t give a fuck about formality just make me cum at least three times”

he got 😳 for a sec but got your point

not a rough lover but once you get in a fight

bitch

you’re both pretty mature ppl so every rare time you fight it’s very Very serious

will kiss you until your both breathless just so you can not even catch your breath bcs he will be kissing your neck and liking your skin

slaps your butt?

absolutely

a fucking lot

“funny how you turn shut the fuck up as soon as i lay my hands on you”

makes you strip for him

has a thing for watching where your bodies connect

call him baby and he’s got a 3 secs tops soft jun

like a little grin with puffy cheeks

and he’s back with the restless pounding

bathtub aftercare is a must

massages your feet as you talk sweet nothings for him

if you’re feeling feisty might get a romantic round two

loves doing it slowly so he can drag it to the point you get so hot and bothered you beg

“oh god- just please- jun, faster”

likes it when you rub his back after

get a shot of soft myeonie post-sex

lays in his stomach and quietly asks “can you”

you lay there also on your stomach and rubbing his back drawing circles and talking about life

once he got so full of idk emotion?? love?? idk never been there

he just poured a whole “marry me”

like dude.

“WHAT” “not today, like... in a few years maybe idk forget it”

he closed his eyes to dismiss your reaction and just felt a warm peck on his naked shoulder

“of course i’ll marry you a few years”

his eyes shot open like This woman. the loml. dead ass said yes to my hypothetical proposal”

he actually got emotional

“kajsksjsksjsk really?????????v

“yes really”

and there was a teardrop

you felt like dying

i mean I feel like dying rn

doesn’t say it but thinks abt having kids someday

and u know that bcs honestly it’s suho everybody just Knows that

his parents? ofc they know you

exo? absolutely sure they know you

“one day we’re gonna have a dinner on like christmas with my family and yours” “baby they don’t even live in korea” “i don’t care we’ll pay” “STOP”

really treasures your relationship like i’m not here to play games i’m past mid-20’s this is Serious

and because he’s so worried and serious he nevers seems to let loose

which is probably normal since he’s a leader

but it makes him so !! all the time u get worried

once he actually CRIED out of stress

and you ofc were there

you kept hugging him tightly and slowly rocking his body with yours kissing his tears away as he kept softly saying “i’m fine, don’t worry”

you didn’t stop worrying

you said “if you’re fine then i can stay here hugging my boyfriend”

he nodded and kept sobbing for a little while

his head was pounding so you literally laid him down and cuddled him in your arms, fingers between his locks and hot breath on his neck

he once said the sound of your breath calmed him

so that’s what you did

you calmed him

and that’s everything he ever wanted

someone to be there for him on tough times like he’s always there for everyone

he loves the fact you’re always so calm and ready to solve any problem that appears

he loves the calmness and ““““normal”””” atmosphere you bring to him

after all those years of hardship and responsability

you showed him he could be a leader and have more fun on a daily basis

he deadass thinks abt your marriage

like it’s barely 6am, he wakes up and sees you sleeping next to him, hair everywhere on the pillow and mouth open

his heart goes 💓💓💓💓💓💓💓💓💓💓💓

his arms goes to your sleeping body

& his mind “i’m gonna marry this girl someday”

idk i feel like i could write a whole ass fanfiction of 50 chapters on suho and id still have 100 scenarios of him in mind

i honestly love him sm

such a nice boy

he deserves so much more

give lota of love to him he’s perfect

that’s it i’m done

[herotheshiro]

2nd post which may probably even be my last post for last night’s binging (bc idc enough abt the other mangas i read really. maybe i’ll just tack them on to the end of this post bc i’m too lazy to do another post) is mukou no hito/the man on the other side. EDIT: jk just finished reading ueno poteto’s other work on futekiya in the middle of writing this so i’ll just combine both works into this post

EDIT 2 AT TIME OF PUBLISHING: rip i ended up finishing this post days after that futekiya binge lol. i can only grind out so many reviews at once

1st up is mukou no hito/the man on the other side. now on futekiya it only has like 2 stars if i’m interpreting that right or is that spicy level for smut? if it’s the latter then how the fuck does it have 2 stars bc NOTHING happened, i don’t think either of them even jerked off so ... ANYWAY back to story review. what i was trying to say is that it only has 2 stars (?) but it’s actually a pretty decent story although i can get why ppl wouldn’t like it (not talking abt smut level. which yeah as i said nothing happens, they don’t fuck so if you’re looking for smut look elsewhere).

anyway plot. main character sano is an average run of the mill salaryman who’s still living w his fam and is very plain blah blah blah. he has no close friends and he has a lot of mean thoughts (antisocial?) so ppl don’t really take to him (bc when they do talk to him he’s socially awkward and not super open to their attempts to connect w him aggressive or not). he posts his life complaints and casual drawings on twitter though and he strikes up this friendship w an online person which he one day decides to meet ... and turns out it’s narumi, an up and coming/already famous idk actor! rest of story is their developing relationship.

ignoring the facts that there’s no way sano wouldn’t get media attention for striking up a friendship w a famous actor (bc narumi doesn’t really hide his face sometimes and he’s apparently recognizable) and also the low low possibilities for narumi to have ever noticed sano on twitter anyway (he finds him when searching up his own name and sano’s tweet didn’t even mention himself whatsoever ... like what is going on this is not how the internet works) ... i actually liked this story! obvi i’m weak to titles that subtly touch on story points (to sano and narumi, the other man is from a life they couldn’t imagine) but also i was so scared it was gonna turn into some twisted manipulation story but when it didn’t and it just ended up being awkward-wholesome i was like yeah alright! i did enjoy the psychoanalysis of sorts the 2 kind of did on each other? idk i’m just thinking abt that one scene where narumi asks sano to purposely invite his coworker over so he could see narumi and sano is like ‘wtf is this guy thinking??’.

i thought what was being implied was that narumi wanted to find a way out of his celebrity life by purposely seeking out potential scandal or something (physically meeting up with sano, trying to get sano to post abt him on social media, trying to make sure sano’s coworkers knew that they were friends) but idk. i think it was supposed to just be 2 guys trying to find a friend in each other and it ended up turning into romantic interest lol. also sorry to be a top/bottom person but i think of narumi as the top ... saying that explicitly bc i kind of get the vibe the author sees narumi as the bottom so. just putting my opinion out there. reversible though am i right

2nd one is katsutoshi which is a collection of stories really: the majority of it involve the eponymous character katsutoshi but then the last story is a separate unrelated one. the 1st 3 stories were sad to read tbh: the 1st one wasn’t sad per se but i just didn’t care too much for it (an actual one night stand tht doesn’t actually turn into anything more unlike the typical BL story); the 2nd one was sad bc of unrequited love and katsutoshi not really knowing how to find love; and the 3rd was like a mini sequel of the 1st story. the 4th story was cute bc finally katsutoshi may have found a relationship with someone who actually has feelings for him and wants to take care of him and i was like aww a good finish to katsutoshi’s story after the previous 3 stories. the 5th story was also cute, it’s abt an officeworker senior and junior who eventually get into a relationship.

i’m writing this review like a week or so (prob less lol i have no sense of time anymore) after i read it so idr much specific things to talk abt and i don’t want to reread the first few stories bc they’re sad. i think the last 2 stories are enjoyable to read, i feel like this author doesn’t romanticize creepy/problematic behavior/advances although characters do just kind of forgive others maybe a bit too easily. i do enjoy this person’s art though and i followed them on twitter so looking forward to potentially being able to read their future works. their storywriting kind of remind me of like indie manga artists like idk sneaky red, stories that deviate a little away from the typical BL story (aggressive/awkward but with a heart of gold/asshole who will eventually be reformed seme + shy and meek/very into sex/born sexy yesterday aka almost unbelievably stupid/dense uke). and i do appreciate the lack of smut, i think the author does make up for it through the given interactions.

anyway that reminded me i still need to finish sneaky red before my access to futekiya expires in a week or so. god i’ve wanted to finish sneaky red for so long but also it makes me kind of sad ... i mean yeah the dude is sexually into getting physically abused so it’s not like romanticized senseless abuse and ik from raws that the other guy eventually kind of reforms and tries his hardest to get his anger management issues under control bc he eventually gets feelings but also ... it’s kind of wack.

[dachi-chan25]

So i finally watched It chapter 2...

DISCLAIMER: So I know most of y'all don't like anyone to critizise anything u like, right of the bat I am telling u I did NOT liked this movie at all, there are changes I thought were good ideas but most of it was just plain terrible in MY opinion and I need to vent. If u share my opinión or find my rage amusing read on.

.

.

I had been putting off watching this movie, cuz in 2017 I enjoyed the 1st IT movie but I had a TON of issues with it (Mike's complete erasure, Stan being a completely different character, The Losers Club moments being sacrificed to cool sounding one-liners, WTF happened to Henry Bowers and Alvin Marsh, Bev being overly sexualized, etc, etc) so I was on the fence about this one. The cast is what finally caught my attention but then I heard very mixed reviews about it, and as I am starting on a new job I hadn't had the time to go and watch it til now and oh boy was I disappointed.

First off, we have to ask ourselves was Adrian Melon's murder scene really that necessary??? I understand what they used it for in the movie (to make a R3ddi3 reference /as a side note I do not care for the ship or any other IT ship tbh i write it like this cuz i don't want this post to invade the ship tag) but the characters involved are never mentioned again and it was too gratuitous (like we can have a homophobic hate crime, slurs thrown around all the time but we can't have the gay ship this movie was going for saying they love each other in a straightforward manner??? I know this is an unpopular opinion but I am not giving Muschietti props for doing the gay closeted ship for the 1000th time, if u were gonna do it go for it!!! Do right by the characters, hell in the book they get more tenderness and they are never explicitly gay, Eddie is heavily coded as gay or asexual and Richie is super bisexual) like my queer ass is tired of seeing gay ppl die in violent gruesome ways all the time.

While I love Bill Skarsgard's performance, the excess of CGI and all those jumpscares and strobe lights, actually take away from his performance, he is super scary and eerie when he is talking and even being friendly but super hillarious and plain silly when he is actually trying to be scary or when he is eating, it looked too wierd.

TBH whyyy was Tom Rogan in this?? Muschietti had already changed Alvin Marsh from being physically violent to being a sexual predator (everything they changed from Bev took away from her character, like we can have her smoking and flirting w Mr Keene but we can't have her teaching Richie how to use his yo-yo or winning in a fucking video game or drawing or anything that remotely has to do with her character) why was Tom necessary?? Hell we could have skipped that and have Bev in Kay's house telling her all that happened instead, I mean if he wasn't gonna die in the sewer why is he even a character? It was so easy to erase him and have Kay instead. Also how tf did Alvin survive???

Whyyy do that to Audra??? I fucken hate Muschietti, was it necessary to justify Bill cheating on her??? Nope, we could have simply have Bill not kiss Beverly and that’s it, also I am kinda salty Audra is not part of the plot.

Lmao Henry, like he fell on the fucken pipe and you could hear his fucken bones breaking and craking and he gets to get up and walk home????????? Whyyy y y , Muschietti ????

We never really got to see how deeply ingrained Pennywise is in the town, he is actually Derry. And if Muschietti thinks he fixed the wtf ending everyone complained about in the 90's adaptation he is on fucken drugs, this ending is super messed up and has nothing to do with the book or with anything at all, we never get to know what exactly is Pennywise, his true form it's a clown spider apparently or something cuz the death lights were there but not really ???

STAN was fucken robbed (again) last time he was completely ereased, he was physically there on the scenes but that’s it, his personality was null. And his thing, the thing that made him comit suicide was the fact that he was the one to see the death lights, the most logical and disbelieving of them faced something far beyond anyone's comprehension and they gave that to Bev?? And the death lights apparently gave her Final Destination abilities? ?????

Eddie was robbed. Of so so much. Muschietti fuck you. Frist off why isn't Eddie the CEO of some app like Uber like he was the Losers Club compass he was a great fucking driver, he loved sports (I actually got excited when they had this scene with the baseball game cuz i thought it was gonna be an Eddie scene but nope) y not connect that with this Token bs Muschietti pulled off his ass (this is actually a great idea, and could symbolize the Losers' lost childhood IF Muschietti had been assed to give them significance or something in part 1) His death scene. Just why? Why are his last words a cheap joke instead of a love confession, fuck it Muschietti if u wanted R3ddi3 have the courage to really do it (in the books the Losers take turns to carry his body out of the sewer cuz they will not leave him there, that's more meaningful than them diving) One of his most beautiful quotes is something Bill is writing??? Lmaoooo Bill wishes he could have thought up that (I love Bill but come the fuck on)

Why make such a huge deal out of B3nv3rly or r3ddi3 when the point of it all was that the Losers Club all loved each other, apart from whatever romantic feelings, they found a family in one another and they really erased that in this movie, I was like y are this ppl friends with each other. Mike drugged Bill, Richie was awfull to everyone, they barely had a conversation in the restaurant (biihhh the 90s miniseries does this better) and show no respect for Mike at all ( I mean I am not surprised cuz Muschietti has no respect for Mike as a character at all) or bill like nah son.

Stephen King cameo was there I guess, it was fine.

The Kiss me fat boy, of all things u could have taken from the 90's miniseries why that?????

Ben building the house club by himself ???? Bullshit, Muschietti ereased another great Losers Club bonding time and hate him for it.

MIKE, I AM ENRAGED. So Muschietti is braver than King for making R3ddi3 "canon" but he destroyed Mike's entire character and that is fine with y'all mmmmm. His parents were "crackheads" apparently cuz it's not like that is a stereotype black ppl have carried on for years on end, he did not go to school, he was not the historian but now he is cuz he had to stay and he is crazy and obsesive and drugs Bill and also stole from a native american tribe???? FUCK this so fucken much I hate it with all my being .

How does such a choppy movie manage to drag on forever??? Like there were still 45 Min left and I was bored out of my mind. Why is the final arc so bad??? Like some much stuff that could have actually gotten away with erasing (Paul Bunyan, whyyy it was so silly, it doesn't even work in the book, but fine like King was super high he barely remembers writing it, why take it to the big screen u should have sticked to him being afraid of clowns like u had already messed up) and added and could have added things that actually enriched the adaptation.

I just give up. Like if they do a 3rd one like it's rumored I won't see it, Muschietti clearly does not know how to be subtle or to have meaningful character arcs, he is just good for cheap jumpscares, one líners and yo mama jokes so I pass. I really hoped the up coming King adaptations are better than this one. That being said the movie had real fun/enjoyable moments, if this were not an adaptation I would have liked it a hella lot more than I did but alas nope.

[franeridart]

dude your recent demon & angel kiribaku art reminds me a little bit of aziraphale and crowley from good omens!! like aziraphale would be angrier as baku obvs but still i thought of it and it made me happy lol

A lot of people have mentioned that in the tags/under the post and that makes me!!! super happy!!!! Good Omens is one of my fav books and Crowley one of my fav characters, so the comment feels nice! I wasn’t specifically thinking about them when drawing it, but possibly a bit I was influenced anyway!! I wonder if what made everyone think about them was Kiri’s sunglasses? It’s not noticeable but I did give him glowing eyes too after all haha

Anon said:Have you ever thought about how op a TodoBakuDeku fusion would be? (if they could stay together that is lol!)

Never thought of it tbh, but at this point I’m pretty sure with a lot of work on Baku’s part they’d be able to stick together long enough! He wouldn’t find it comfortable but they’d def be one of the strongest three-people-fusions in the class - not the strongest, tho, since they all have the same sort of straightforward offensive power when it comes to their quirks, I think I could find three people who’d make a stronger fusion... Baku Kiri and Momo, for example, would be even more impressive imho! Since all their quirks cover a different field, and their minds/personalities mesh well enough to have the right amount of planning and instinctive reaction/self-preservation and safety of others/pride and self-doubt/lawfulness and chaotic acting and so on. Even just as a team, without counting them as a fusion, I think they’d make one of the most balanced ones! Compared to that putting Todo Deku and Baku in the same place is just a recipe for disaster more often than not haha

Anon said:no, i move slow, I wanna stop time, I'll sit here til I find the,, inspiration to draw,,,,,,

LMAO it’s a song about art block after all, I feel every word in it a whole damn lot hahaha

Anon said:Art block or no art block, I love everything you come up with 💜

AW HECK ANON you’re so sweet!!! Thank you so much!!!!! ;O;

Anon said:Mixing thei hero names? So uuuh King Riot?

We still don’t know Baku’s hero name, so anything might be, really! It’s why I didn’t outright have Kiri mention any idea, I got no clue myself where he was going with it haha it’d be cool if his hero name were Ground Zero, because it’d mix well with Red Riot imho (Red Zero or Ground Riot or Red Ground, they all sound nice!) but what if Baku’s hero name ends up just being Katsuki, after all? How do you mix that with Red Riot? (the answer is Red Victory, or Akatsu!! from akai (red) + katsu !! ngl I’ve thought about this a lot lmao) anyway so many possibilities so little known facts!

Anon said:I love the details on Kiri and Baku's skin. Great job!!

THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!!

Anon said:!!!!!!!!!! fran oh my god your zine piece is so beautiful!!!!!!!

Sob thank youuu!!!! I’m glad you liked it!!!! ;O;

Anon said:i just got my zine and the art and writing was so lovely, i loved your comic at the end. an amazing way to end the zine♡

THANK YOU!!!! I’m jelly, I still haven’t gotten mine ;O; I hope the comic was easy to read even in printed form, I’ve been worried about that for months hahaha rip at least there’s the pdf

Anon said: i’m in love with your kiri bday art!!!! with the colorless art like that, are we allowed to color it? of course no posting it, but just for fun.

If you promise not to post it, I’m cool with it! Thank you for liking it enough to want to do that!!! Seriously tho don’t post it if you do

Anon said:Can you draw more kamisero? g u d q u a l i t y s h i p ma' dude.

Maybe? Currently it really isn’t between my top priorities but who knows

Anon said:FRANNNNN!!!! Your comic for the Take My Hand zine!!!! I'm gonna cry! It's so beautiful and the boys are so perfect! Your art is so amazing, I was so thrilled to see your piece. Not to mention the detail you put in. Their hands killed me! With Bakugou's palms and Kiri's arms! Ugh, I just can't, I love it so much.

I’M SO GLAD YOU LIKED THE HANDS it’s weird bc that one panel is probably my fav in the comic and I was so sure no one was gonna really notice it but!! So many people did!!!!! It makes me so happy oh man ;O;

Anon said:Hey coulda maybe make a traitor Kaminari comic?

Nope! No traitor arts here, sorry! SInce I don’t believe any of the theories to the point of finding them outright laughable, any art I could ever make about it would just come out looking either fake or ridiculous and no one wants to see that lmao

Anon said:your take my hand comic!!! it's so good!! thank you for doing the boys so well ;;;

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THANK YOUUUU!!!!!!!!

Anon said:I don't know if you remember, but a couple months ago I asked if it'd be okay for me to write something based on a few of your art pieces. Would that still be alright? Your art is gorgeous and makes my brain think and brings joy to me all the time ^^ would absolutely link to the art and credit you. that's not even a question :)

That still depends on which art you’re specifically talking about! And thank you so much for the compliment!!

Anon said:I don’t know if you read fan fiction, but I have one to suggest to you! It’s called, “It’s Obvious When You Lie”. Only three chapters are out so far, but it’s really good!

I’ll add it to my marked for later list then!! Thank you so much for the rec, I don’t easily try out ongoing fics so this was very nice of u!!!

Anon said:In the body switch AU Todoroki sees how fucked up Midoriya feels around Bakugou('s body?) and realizes wow fuck this guy has traumatized my bf. I wonder what I can do to fuck w/ him so the day before they switch back (So Bakugou can't do much in retaliation) he takes Bakugou's body and does the stupidest bullshit ever as revenge

HECK anon sorry but nothing like this would happen ever as long as I’m the one writing the AU! For three main reasons! One, I don’t think Deku is traumatized at all! His relationship with Baku at the moment is actually pretty damn neat and on equal footing, you go you two, growing so much!! Two, Baku and Todo are friends!!! And Todo would never be a dick to Baku instead of just talking to him, if he had a problem with him!! Three, even if one and two weren’t true, Deku has no need for knights in shining armor fighting his battles for him!! He’s a strong independent boy and if he hasn’t fought Baku over this it’s probs cause he doesn’t want anyone to fight him over it!!! Also in this specific AU Todo and Deku aren’t dating, so the scenario doesn’t work for me! Sorry!

Anon said:Have you ever thought about krbk wedding?

I have! And I’ve talked about it on here a few times too! Lately I’ve been thinking about it again tho, from a designs point of view, because!! There’s that very neat post going around tumblr about that wedding photos in which one of the two grooms has a white tux with a cape, and I’ve been thinking about a variation of it for Kirishima’s wedding suit :0 something red instead of white, but generally similar! It’s a lot of effort to draw it so I still haven’t, but yeh!!

Anon said:Hello! I read this fic about your cat comics and the author said to send you some love in their end notes so here is some well-deserved love: your art is beautiful! It's why I became interested in BakuShima and I would not have loved these characters as much if it weren't for you. You also seem to be a very nice person, your mind is beautiful and I am glad you exist

G O DS this is such a nice ask!!!! thank you so so much!!!! ;O;

Anon said:Non chiedo una risposta a questo messaggio, anzi. Volevo solo dirti che trovo la tua arte FANTASTICA, e non sai quanto i tuoi comic e tutto il tuo lavoro mi ha strappato più di un sorriso in brutti momenti. Sapere che sei italiana mi ha fatto totalmente impazzire. Continua così, hai del talento vero. E grazie!

NUHHHH GRAZIE A TE PER ESSERE COSI’ GENTILE OMFG !!!!!!!!!! ;A;

Anon said:Okay okay okay! I adore your art! Could you maybe... draw some KiriBaku fantasy? If it’s not too much to ask! It can be as simple as can be! Your art is just really cute!

Yes I can and yes I will!!! Definitely and in the near future, did you know one of the app games JUST revealed a fantasy wolf Baku as a special halloween chara?? It’s just fantasy Baku with wolf ears and tail, but he’s adorable and I’ve been wanting to draw him since I saw him this morning ;O; so cute!

Anon said:Pssst. Singer Baku, Guitarist Kami, and Drummer Kiri. A good hc if I do say so myself.

It IS a great thought!! Drummer Kiri and Singer Baku have always been a weakness of mine too, so heck!! What a good image! If we put Jirou on bass and vocals too and sero on keyboard and mina on guitar, you make my fav band right then and there hahaha

Anon said:I'm not in the BNHA fandom at the moment but your art still continues to give me the warm fuzzies

GODS ISN’T THIS A NICE ASK!! I’m happy I can make you enjoy even characters you’re not specifically into! Thank you so much for sticking around!!!! ;O;

Anon said:i just got into bnha and fell in love with your art, started going through your sketch tag, and then realize that youre the person who made a bunch of haikyuu comics i loved a while ago so im! very glad to rediscover your stuff!!

HOLY GODS THAT’S NEAT!!! Welcome back!!!! ;O;

Anon said:I love it when you draw kiri with his hair down 💕💕💕 so good, so pure 💕💕💕💕

Oh boy thank you!! ;O; he’s so much easier to draw with his hair spiked for me, knowing people like the way I draw his hair when down means a whole damn lot!! 

Anon said:Hello! First I love your account and artwork! Second will you ever be drawing Mako and Taiyou again? They are so adorable! Also Bakugou and Kirishima seems like amazing dad's!

Thank you!!! And yes I will! I have another ask around here asking about them, so maybe soon! Just gotta find the right idea to draw, I got a bunch but they’re all way too long for my curret attenton span level sadly hahaha rip

Anon said:lmaaaaooo my boi kaminari be having an emotional awakening

Kaminari is like, he’s always somewhere subconsciously known that Baku’s objectively pretty, but since he knows him so well and he’s always around him and most of the times they’re bickering and making fun of each other he’s never actually realized, so now he’s like oh, NOW I see it hahaha

Anon said:hi u probably get this enough but I wanted to give u all my appreciation for ur art thank u for sharing it with us I love everything u post ♡♡♡

THANK YOU!!!! It might be greedy of me but this sorta asks are never enough for me, so seriously thank you for taking your time to drop by and be so nice!!!

Anon said:Could you please draw more of the body swap au? Or what if a different pair of students were to switch?

I’m not gonna draw any other switch with other students, because before settling on Baku and Todo I went through a lot of possibilities and came to the conclusion that nothing would be as funny as Baku and Todo switched are (or at least nothing Horikoshi hasn’t already done himself lmao) so there’s that. I might draw more of them switched, but to be honest with you the only idea with that concept I have right now is Bakugou forgetting he’s suddenly taller and continuously walking into things around the dorms, so there’s that as well hahaha

[whitherliliesbloom]

Your stuff wasn't even sexual. :/ So like... do these people hating on you honestly believe it's not right for anyone under 18 to date or be in a relationship at all? Like... I'd understand if you were out here drawing hardcore porn, lmao. And I understand that some people are more sensitive to that topic and are uncomfortable by it, so they should just???? unfollow you? And not try to like, orchestrate a tirade against you. :/ So idk. Sorry to see the bs you're going through.

Found your blog from the bit of controversy around your ship, and was expecting something a bit more racy than what I found. >w>;; I don't know what you're getting all the hate for, tbh. Yeah, Alphinaud is a minor, but like... he's 16. If that's pedophilia then we better start marching on every anime, movie, and tv show that depicts two people under 18 who might have any sort of relationship, lmao. (1/2)

Oh no ;; I really was hoping that this would die down without more drama but I guess not. 

Part of me does understand where these people are coming from. Pretty much any character who isn’t above 18 is gonna be almost immediately labelled as a child in the West and nobody’s gonna care about the context of the series, culture or nuances. I should have known this discourse was coming when I started making content for my ship.

But at the same time, I wasn’t expecting to see people literally send a mob my way just to tell me what a horrible person I am for shipping something fictional with a 3 (2 if you count the sped up time Alphinaud experienced in ShB) year age difference. The thought of making anything sexual hadn’t even crossed my mind, either. Hell I don’t think I’ve posted a single content of my ship where they even touched skins. I just don’t understand how my content is being talked about as if it were the same as ch*ld//p*rn. 

Rambling aside, I am at least grateful that multiple amazing and wonderful people like yourself have reached out to me. I’ve had the support of some lovely friends too who reassured and comforted me while I was busy nearly having a panic attack over this discourse. So thank you

I won’t let this one incident stop me from making content. I’m not doing it for street cred anyway. I’m making content that makes me happy and if I’m able to make others happy with my content too, that’s a bonus. 

[jlf23tumble]

1D Day, Hour Three

Almost halfway through this hour, which is almost halfway through this day, is the point where Louis Tomlinson stops having fucks left to give and starts getting real. He’s still a professional throughout hour three (not like Harry in hour two, oof), but god, how??? Everything here is a disaster, and it’s infuriating when you consider that a) this must have been somewhat planned out (the band is HUGE, allegedly 32 million people are watching), and b) it’s being produced in LA, presumably with easy access to professionals who have had some experience with live shows (since, what, the 1930s???). Anyway, I would have loved to hear the choice words Louis no doubt had for Ben Winston when he ran away during one of the Google+ Hangouts, lmao.

When I first watched this two years back, Niall’s nervous laughter nearly drove me insane, but this time around, I’m loving the subtle nuances w/r/t wtf is happening on this here day as Louis’s rage starts to climb and Niall’s Slytherin core starts to emerge. Deets under the cut.

Niall and Louis literally burst through a paper wall to launch hour three and reveal Niall’s lilac hair (also revealed: the fact that Niall’s “a diva,” according to Louis). The color’s hardly even noticeable, but Niall’s all worked up about it, and I’m betting he had to do this because he has no tattoos, so everyone wanted to freak his Virgo ass out with something “permanent.”

The first bit is so tiresome (Louis’s childhood friend, Stan, forcing the Milkshake City staff to perform the world’s sleepiest version of “Rock Me”), but I’m a huge fan of Stan’s for the Larry purple dildo video alone (ICONIC; ping me if you need a link), plus I love the tidbit about the time Harry came in for a milkshake for himself and “a friend back at home.”

After we survive this long-ass bit of fill, Louis and Stan take the piss out of each other and banter a bit with Niall, which is all pretty hilarious and also makes me sad in the key of “oh how I wish that was me.”

Because it wasn’t at all tedious in hour one, it’s time for another Guinness Book of World Records challenge (Louis: “Of course it is”), this time balancing coins on faces. Hey, speaking of faces, did you know that men are at peak hotness between the ages of 32 and 36? This guy is 22 years old, doing the stupidest task ever, help me, Jeebus:

Next up is the randomizer, which randomly pulls celebrity videos, and this is when the in-ears start acting up for Louis, who’s midway through Robbie Williams asking them for the best live performer they’ve ever seen, prompting Louis to give Ben the evil eye off camera and go off script to say Michael Buble, ha.

Some random sports man (update: Doncaster Rovers manager) demands that they do pressups up and burpees, and Louis gives us a surprisingly strong and steady nine pressups before proving why he’s most relatable:

After fits of unnecessary laughter from Niall, and a lot of exasperation about the technical problems so far from Louis (friend, you’ve seen nowt yet), we get the best VT from this entire day, the iconic bts video for “Talk Dirty to Me,” and if you watch nothing from any of this, please tell me you’ve seen it in full for Zayn the goofball! Liam’s hanky code shoutouts! Harry’s hip chub! Louis and his glorious torso! Niall in full Farmer Ted mode!

Next up, we get astronauts congratulating the D from space, and whyyyyyyyyyyyyyy. I mean, honestly, WHY? Are these astronauts fans? Is anyone besides Niall into space? I know there’s an intense interest in making space interesting for teens (how many times have people on the international space station beamed their way into MTV award shows at this point), but whyyyyy.

Scott tells us we’ll soon see Doctor Who (mild interest from Nouis) and Simon Cowell (Louis: “SIMON COWELL, WOO HOO, I LOVE THAT GUY!” Niall: “Simon GROWL”), but first up is Doctor Who, and this is where the wheels fall off the bus, technically speaking. First, there’s a 15-minute delay (!!), so Nouis are standing around while the Doctor handles some other interview for the BBC. Eventually, they connect, and Louis makes the understatement of the year (“This is gonna be tough”) as both the video and audio go full Inception and echo in and around each other to make us all woozy:

Louis again understates the chaos happening on screen by saying, “I think actually that this is not working,” and then begging for any VT, they don’t care, help (the VT is Niall being all humblecholy about their success and Ireland and something something, I’m not actually interested, sorry).

We come back to Louis still losing it, curious as to how they can have a link to space but can’t have a studio in LA link to the BBC, and yeah. YEAH. But enough about that, it’s Google+ Hangout (lololololol) time, and we don’t get too many answers to these vital fan questions because Ben is in Louis’s ear so much that Louis starts arguing with him about it and eventually runs off stage to yell at him in person, and god, it’s glorious. READY 2 FIGHT:

Because this is an utter trainwreck, the team decides to do another live link again, this time to the X Factor while it’s airing in the UK, and it’s…yeah, not good. Just awful, cameras out of synch, no sound, etc. Save us, random VT of Denmark!!

Hearing Louis say “tits up” is my new religion, but honestly, this chitchat with McFly is such a revelation. Apparently, they worked with Niall on something, so they gossip with Louis about what a diva Niall is (!) and how he brought a friend of his named Shawn around (!!), and there’s a lot of inside jokes I know nothing about, but I’m LIVING for Niall looking at all these boys on the screen and saying, “I feel like I’m alone in my bedroom,” and Louis’s response, “Okay, Niall!”

“Don’t Forget Where You Belong” is announced, but we don’t get to hear it (although we DO get to see some sweet Nouis dancing), and two more girls go into the call box of doom. Because this show’s producers can’t go ten minutes without a disaster, there’s increasingly urgent screaming from Louis to Ben to just roll the Zayn graffiti VT, which takes at least a full, tense minute to post. 

Zayn is incredibly hot, but my heart breaks for him saying it’s their 127th show, and he’s feeling inspired and creative to make art, and I just wonder how??? How are you not banging your head against a wall instead of painting it? Anyway, it’s a lot of spraypainting/artist au Zayn come to life, with Liam working out shirtless nearby and heaping praise on just about every single thing Zayn puts on the wall (awwwww). Also some nice Flicker reference points (Niall: “Zayn, will you draw a picture of me?” Zayn: “No. I don’t like you”). Ouch.

We come back to Rebecca, an opera singer who’s here to sing some tweets, and this is a horrible idea that Ben Winston stole from Jimmy Kimmel, right? When he used to have Josh Groban sing tweets a million years ago? Anyway, this ripoff doesn’t work because nobody can really understand the words, but credit to Louis for trying to cheat and speed this whole thing up:

When Rebecca finishes, Louis says he got emotional (Niall just laughs), and this poor girl says not to worry, she’ll do more later, and lmao at Louis: “Oh, OH, there’s more in store, Niall” (Niall: “Can’t wait”), sighhhhh, it’s torture for us all, tbh. Anyway, time for some Belgian VT and reinforcement that Louis’s part Belgian, which is why it’s super relevant, I guess.

The last bit is back to Dynamo, to redo the magic bit that failed with Harry in hour two. I’m still curious about this trick because there’s a piece of paper locked in this box (Harry’s dick holds the key to it), and tl/dr, Harry says April for the month an hour ago, but Louis says November, and sure enough, November plus all the other details are in this locked box. HMMMMM. Me as Harry’s finger delivering the key immediately in this segment, meaning he’s literally right there watching all of it. Pick someone supportive, etc.

Anyway, back to the trick, there’s a bit where Louis says he told Dynamo all this information earlier (Niall starts chewing his nails a bit ferociously at that), but then he backpedals brilliantly later about what an amazing, stunning trick, etc., and this group of sneaky liars, god, I love ‘em!

We get more terrible highlights, which sucks, because I kind of liked the way Louis was asking Niall what HIS highlights were, but never mind, let’s get Ben’s. I’ll leave you with this picture that makes me think of Louis hosting Family Feud, you know, the final round, when you have to see how your answers stacked up with a family member’s and if, together, you cleared 200 (“Name someone a person may confess a crime to”):

[syranaluvr]

Kousuke in ch.63: w/Nol

So I’ve seen a decent amount of this floating around and just wanted to give my two cents on the matter. In summary, I think his behavior was problematic at times but not as bad as people are making it out to be.

I’m gonna break down my thoughts on his interactions with Nol, mainly: (1) Kousuke blaming Nol, (2) him not interfering with the arrest and in a separate post bc this got way too long: (3) his talk with Shin ae at the hospital.

This gets a bit long with the screenshots and all so under the cut it goes!

First, Kousuke blaming Nol

So I have seen a lot of hate for this and it’s understandable considering we readers already feel so bad for Nol and know it was not really in his control, so of course people are gonna bare fangs at anyone who yells at him. But still, I think Kousuke should be cut a little slack.

This is right before Kousuke starts yelling and its the most harrowed we’ve ever seen him. Someone he cares for is possibly seriously hurt and going to the hospital, his mom is being totally embarrassed and humiliated (yeah I know the readers probably don't give a flying fuck but come on, it’s his mom), his father is witnessing the whole kerfuffle and a huge scene is being made out of the family which is something Kousuke has been shown to be worried about way back in the beginning. He is probably stressed out beyond belief, but what he is the most concerned about is Shin ae (obviously). 

So he is mad at Nol for dropping them. And that kinda makes sense? Like we know that Nol was traumatized by Mrs. Hirahara which is why he just let go instinctively but that’s not what Kousuke saw. From his perspective, Nol is having some trouble pulling them up but he’s managing to at least hold them in place. Kousuke hears him asking for help and Mrs. Hirahara offering assistance and then Nol lets go. That’s it. His hand didn’t slip. There was no “Oh no I can’t hold on!” or “You’re slippling!” From Kousuke’s point of view, Nol literally just let go for no apparent reason, letting them both fall, resulting in Shin ae hitting her head and passing out. So yeah he’s mad. 

Kousuke thinks Nol might have let go because of their bad relationship, though even he thinks that’s ridiculous based on how he says it. Like he didn’t expect Nol to do something like that, but in truth, he knows he probably doesn’t know Nol that well, and the fact is Nol did let go so there must have been some reason for him to go all ‘long live the king’ on him. 

Would it have been better if Kousuke actually asked Nol why he let go and talked to him about it? Sure. But as stated before, the situation is crazy. There’s a lot going on, he wants to get to the hospital asap, and at the end of the day, these two brothers don’t have a good relationship so coddling Nol isn’t exactly on the top of his priority list. (If he was a better brother then maybe he would have given him the benefit of the doubt, but alas, they are not there yet).

Okay now this, I did really have a problem with. Though from Kousuke’s point of view, Nol letting go did play a role in Shin ae getting injured, he also knows that her being drunk/drugged and fighting the mom, etc. is also to blame for her falling into the pool in the first place. So saying its “ALL thanks to you” is not right. However, I think from a story standpoint I know why that line was included. A big part of this chapter was a Nol guilt-fest. As we could tell from his face, Nol already felt guilty and what everyone else said just rubbed it in.  In this webtoon we only get Shin ae’s thoughts conveyed in words, so in order to show Nol’s guilt in future chapters I’m pretty sure that he’s going to flashback to the its ‘all thanks to you’ line. So in my opinion, that line is serving more of a plot device role than much of a reflection of Kousuke’s thoughts and character. 

What’s also worth noting is that Kouskue isn’t mad at Nol for dropping him into the pool. He’s mad because Shin ae was hurt. We don’t usually get to see Kousuke getting emotional, so this anger at Nol is also indirectly conveying how concerned he is for Shin ae, furthering the idea that he cares about her (let us not forget that this is a love triangle). If someone you care about gets hurt, it’s natural to get angry at whatever is to blame. Is Kousuke mad at his mom and Sang chul? Probably. But in this moment, Nol is also to blame and he’s the one standing beside him. So it sucked that Nol had to get yelled at like that because he doesn’t deserve it, but that was a pretty human reaction from Kousuke. It wasn’t Kousuke just deliberately being mean to Nol.

Okay that was long but I promise the next part is shorter.

So onto Kousuke not trying to stop Nol from getting arrested. 

As a sort of aside, it seems like the arrest happened pretty quickly tbh. It was basically ‘you’re under arrest-suspicious vial-get in the car’. Kousuke had already started walking away and maybe there just wasn’t any chance to interject. But even if he could have, that still doesn’t mean Kousuke is a horrible person for not doing so. 

Firstly, he may have thought there was no point in trying at that time. Many people saw Nol drop them, and he probably heard them talking about calling the cops on him. So he probably knew that in the situation they were in with all the other witnesses, he didn’t have a good chance of convincing the cop to stop. It would just be making an even bigger scene that amounts to nothing. 

Also, there is still a chance that Kosuke is going to help Nol later on. As we saw back in the chapter in the mall where the lady threw soda at Shin ae, Kousuke is not one to get involved in the most direct way. Back in that chapter, Nol directly went up to Shin ae and the kid to help. Conversely, Kousuke reported the lady to security and bought Shin ae a new shirt. Two different ways of approaching the same situation. I feel that Kousuke may do something similar here. He didn’t directly go and try to stop the cop, but later he may go through alternative routes to get Nol out, especially after he can gather some more information on everything that happened.

So quimchee draws particular attention to Kousuke’s reaction to Nol getting arrested here. His expressions can be difficult to read, especially since as he said himself his natural face is basically a scowl, so some people might see this as a dismissive face. But personally, I think it might be showing that he’s thinking. Maybe he’s like ‘okay I was mad but I didn’t want him to go jail, yeesh’ or it could be him regretting blaming Nol like he did. Or it could be him filing this as something to address later, because getting to the hospital is his top priority but this Nol-going-to-jail thing isn’t something he’s going to just ignore. We’ll have to wait and see I guess. 

That’s it for Kousuke and Nol, now onto --> Kousuke’s behavior with Shin ae at the hospital... -->

I know this got insanely long, but I just have a lot of thoughts and wanted everything to be explained as clearly as possible. I hope it didn’t seem too bias and made logical sense. If you agree or respectfully disagree feel free to message me about it. I’d love to talk about anything I Love Yoo related :D

[ask-joeydrewstudios]

((soo since June 1st is the blog’s anniversary, I thought I’d post some “concept art” in celebration? :o please excuse the wonky anatomy and errors (GLARES AT THE SAMMY AND SUSIE PAGE), i didn’t think I was ever gonna post these. buuut i personally really like seeing stuff like this from other artists, and I’m sure there’s other people that do too, so I’ll post ‘em since it’s a special occasion. it’s really cool seeing how both the characters and my art style have evolved in the past year tbh xD

some of the characters i knew what they looked like immediately, some of them i sat on for... a while. joey took me a week or two i think, and i don’t know where the drawing went but on my first-ever henry, he had joey’s hairstyle almost?? it was like joey’s hairstyle with sideburns :’D it was horrid. the second henry and all henries after had roughly the same hairstyle he has now. thank god. also that second henry sketch, the fullbody? still one of my favorite henries i’ve ever drawn for some reason...

sammy and susie were easily the easiest out of everyone, i knew what they looked like immediately. soo... they don’t really have any real concept art, they just suddenly Existed xD and long-time followers should remember norman wasn’t with the blog when i started because i was struggling with him, i had a lot of ideas for him and none would really stick but the stuff you see here is when i was finally starting to get a grasp on it.

aaand at the end there is the original sketch of the blog header ; w ; i guess it got smeared on the other page so it lightened out a lot, but it’s still kinda recognizable. i changed some things not including adding new characters over time lol but that’s what it looked like on paper.

...BTW, you can see some of my even earlier henries over here, and my first lacie over here!))