yukinahawmie

[yukinahawmie]

I'm gonna start pictures-dumping what I've made so far for the past 15 years. They've been sitting idly on my computer for years, rarely see the light of the day. These felt flower bouquets were made in 2017. Took a lot of time and patience to do it, so I kinda stopped making new ones now.

[yukinahawmie]

this inspires me to make weird(?) looking soft toys too. i've been wanting to make alien for a while (made some sketches already).

and as an EFL, actually i still can't differentiate 'soft toys', 'plushies' and 'dolls'. i wonder if those three are actually different or they're just interchangeable.

Soft toy I made a while back! (The word plushie is not in my vernacular (ﾐ´ω`ﾐ) I think 'soft toy' is cute too!)First time making this sort of thing it had some fun challenges

[yukinahawmie]

Turning my studio upside down but I haven't been able to spot Crowley....

But I found the picture of the half-naked him alongside other plush dolls I haven't finished.

If I couldn't find it, I think I may have to make him from the beginning again.

The problem is: I don't remember where I put the pattern either.

I didn't mean to leave him too long like this! I'm sorry, Crowley!

First post here!

I made Aziraphale probably back around 2020 (during Covid?) after the series was aired. Played it around a little bit with the tiny chains and I guess the result was better than I thought?

I have Crowley made already just... without the clothes (yeah, he is half naked--he is wearing pants). I don't know when I will continue and finish Crowley. It's been inside my storage box for more than three years already.

[yukinahawmie]

Me: I shouldn't disturb Neil Gaiman. I shouldn't send an ask unless I really have no way of getting the information otherwise. I'll check old interviews and all the articles that vaguely mention the subject. Of course it goes without saying that I'll read though the FAQ in its entirety. Only then, will I send an ask. However, I'd be very polite and praise his work, as anyone would. I'd also keep it short, because I don't want to waste his time. But I'd keep it very very respectful. I'd be sending a message to a very talented, amazing author that deals with god knows how many like me. Or I'd just stay in the dark and not send him an ask. Yeah, I'll do that.

My Dash:

[yukinahawmie]

When I was a kid, maybe 14 or so (which is, you know, 20+ years ago), I belonged to a Yahoo! mailing list for an anime called Gundam Wing. It was mostly populated by other teens, of varying ages, as it was started by a teen and her friends. Eventually it migrated, when Yahoo! groups started as forums, and even branched off into non-GW related stuff in a second forum.

One of the things I remember the most clearly is the oldest person in the group. Her name was Steelsong. She was a 40-something Dom with a sub whose name we knew even though we knew nothing else. She ran her own fanfic archive because the web was still handmade HTML and navigated in webrings and I’m pretty sure Google didn’t exist or was only barely, barely launched and not well known. She was kind and patient and we loved her. She treated everyone on the group with the respect given any adult, even though most of the rest of the world was still treating us like we were children. Not teenagers even, but children. She never once condescended to any of us, never made our youth a barrier to her respect, never treated us like we were incapable of being full people or like we were less than her because we were young.

I remember that she hosted our fanfiction, as absolutely terrible as it was (and I still have some of it, I am WELL aware of how cringingly terrible it is, just absolute nonsense garbage), right there alongside of other fic that was soul-achingly beautiful. Not a separate section for her friends or for kids, just right there like we were good enough to feature alongside other authors. I never once received crit from her that I didn’t ask for, only support. Only love. I am still writing today partly because Steel was so kind about our fic, fanfic and original.

I remember that when I started doing clay sculpture, she commissioned a tiny pair of dragons from me, to support me doing artwork. She sent a check my mom cashed for me, and my mom helped me mail it when it was finished. It broke in transit, and Steel assured me that she mended it and that it was still beautiful. It was a small gold dragon curled up with a small silver dragon.

I remember that her patience knew no bounds. I remember that she was there for us, regardless of reason. When we wanted to know silly things like what to do with a single AA battery, she answered. When we had serious questions about sex, she answered.  When we had questions about writing, she taught us. When one of our group members, a young gay teen in Australia, ended up in the hospital and then stopped making posts, and we all knew what had happened, she let us talk to her about it because we couldn’t go to our own parents, even though we had just lost a friend.

She was not a replacement to my parents, but she was an extra parent, in some ways. A friend, certainly, but someone that had been through more life than we had and was willing to pass on knowledge if we asked for it. Someone older that we trusted with things that were too uncomfortable to go to our parents or teachers or whatever about, because we already knew she wasn’t going to judge us or something, and that we would get an honest answer.

I don’t know why I’m remembering this so hard tonight, and I’m not sure if there’s a point to sharing this, except that I know she’s gone now. She was ill the last time we spoke, and her site went down a long time ago, and I miss her. She was a huge influence on my life, then and now. She was hope, for me, that life as an adult didn’t have to be boring, it wouldn’t have to mean giving up the things I loved and Becoming Only Responsible With No Fun. Her presence meant I had hope I could still write and play with friends even when I wasn’t ‘a kid’ anymore. And she’s gone, and I miss her, and I wanted to share her from the perspective of youth, and the perspective over twenty years later has provided me.

And I think of her, when people go off about older folks being in fandom with younger folks. I’m an older folks now, or at least middle aged folks because there are certainly folks older than me still, but I wasn’t always. I’ve been here since i was a younger folks, and I know how much Steel’s presence and support meant to me, how much she helped not just me but everyone on that group. And I think of the people saying older folks don’t belong in fandom, and that they shouldn’t interact with younger folks at all, and I just think… I can’t agree. I needed that kind of solid presence in my life back then and even at the age I am now, I need the folks older than me to stay. I want them here.

So I guess, like, if you’re here and you’re 40 or 50 or 60 or 70 or 80 or whatever, I want you here in fandom with me, still. Your presence here is a comfort. It is hope. It is a reminder that life will continue to be fun, even as I get older, myself. And if you’re younger and you have this sort of elder in your groups, I hope that they are like Steel. I hope they are kind and patient and supportive, and that knowing them gives you hope for your own future. I hope in twenty years you look back and remember them fondly.

[yukinahawmie]

I've always been wondering how plush makers who's not equipped with advanced plush-making tools make their plushies. I don't have embroidery machine, all I have is an old traditional Singer machine so I mostly hand-sewing the body ornaments/decorations or the facial features. When I tried making plush using fabric like minky, I wasn't able to fill it neatly. The plush just looked kinda wonky because the fabric is stretchy, so I wasn't able to arrange the filling inside just like I do when I'm using felt fabric (since felt is stiff).

I'm still working on it. Especially since I'm trying to use other types of fabric other than felt.

[yukinahawmie]

First post here!

I made Aziraphale probably back around 2020 (during Covid?) after the series was aired. Played it around a little bit with the tiny chains and I guess the result was better than I thought?

I have Crowley made already just... without the clothes (yeah, he is half naked--he is wearing pants). I don't know when I will continue and finish Crowley. It's been inside my storage box for more than three years already.