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You talk sense into me? That would've been interesting.

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↪The Second David Job

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Merlin–a lowly servant, can walk into the cell of a man condemned to die just to talk to him omfg he is the king’s maiden indeed.

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The Titanoboa, is a 48ft long snake dating from around 60-58million years ago. It had a rib cage 2ft wide, allowing it to eat whole crocodiles, and surrounding the ribcage were muscles so powerful that it could crush a rhino. Titanoboa was so big it couldn’t even spend long amounts of time on land, because the force of gravity acting on it would cause it to suffocate under its own weight.

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Huge thanks to Richard of the Order of the Blade for throwing me around!

(If you’re in the UK, consider checking them out! The order are a combat school with a really fun and welcoming ethos)

And as always, more bows, swords, and nonesense on Patreon

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Don't you love it when you're reading a fanfic and you get to a point at the fanfic where it's like "oh fuck" and you know some good angsty-ness is gonna happen because the character was just too stupid for too long.

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Domestic incompetence is going to kill men

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you’re sitting across from me in a shitty diner in anywhere, america, and i watch you pour too much creamer in your coffee and i think “i love you.” you look up, catching me staring, and for a moment i think i’m brave enough to say it, but i take too long and the moment passes. i take the balled up straw wraper and flick it at you, pretending that was my plan all along. you laugh. i never want to go another day without hearing that laugh. i think i will have all the time in the world to say it.

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this whole “never repeat outfits” shit is not working for me. i get attached to one oversized sweater and that’s all you’ll see me in for a week

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Police officer: I'm pulling you over because you were trying to fit three people on a motorcycle

Jason, with Dick and Tim behind him: THREE!?

Officer: Yes, you, and the two-

Jason: DAMIAN FUCKING FELL OFF!?

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The way I left tumblr like 5 years ago because I was seeing too many Nazis but now I’m coming back to tumblr because the other platforms are now literally only Nazis.

Anyways in the timeless words of Dr. Jones himself.

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"The forest was shrinking but the trees kept voting for the axe, for the axe was clever and convinced the trees that because his handle was made of wood he was one of them."

- Turkish Proverb

Okay, trees, I know it's hard to understand but those billionaires? That orange stain now in office? They're the axe, honey. They've always been the axe.

And we've never been anything but kindling to them.

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Misha is such a good actor because even the look in his eyes developed over 12 seasons.