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yeoreobunoppain · 4 years
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Felix: *pranking jeongin in another room*
Jisung, trying to distract Chan: I'm gay!!
Chan: Not dressed like that you aren't
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yeoreobunoppain · 4 years
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STRAY KIDS AS AMONG US PLAYERS: PART 2 (IMPOSTERS)
chan: if someone vouches for his innocence during discussion, he'd spare them
minho: the resident expert at pinning the blame on other crewmates, even if they witnessed the murder right in front of their eyes
changbin: the player who knows all the vents and which ones they're connected to
hyunjin: the player who camps in security/admin to monitor the other crewmates before venting over to kill them
jisung: the player who still hasn't gotten the hang of sabotages so closes all the doors and spams all the sabotages
felix: the player who keeps accidentally venting into a room with somebody and getting caught
seungmin: the player who doesn't kill but wins the game by letting the other crewmates blame one another and vote each other out
jeongin: probably helps to fix sabotages. either gets caught at the very beginning or the very end
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yeoreobunoppain · 4 years
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STRAY KIDS AS AMONG US PLAYERS: PART 1 (CREWMATES)
chan: the player who keeps discussion in order
minho: the player who ignores any dead bodies in favour of finishing tasks
changbin: the player who gets sus-ed most
hyunjin: the player who accuses others without solid proof and actually gets them voted out
jisung: the player who always tells the admin to start the game
felix: the player who calls emergency meetings just for the fun of it
seungmin: the player who is usually able to deduce the killers most accurately, whether believed by the others or not
jeongin: the player who says they have visual tasks during discussion and asks others to watch him to verify his innocence
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yeoreobunoppain · 4 years
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Minho: Wow Chan, your hands are huge. I bet they'd look great-
Jisung: -Wrapped around a bible praise the lord amen
Minho: I was going to say playing the piano
Jisung: Oh sorry then
Minho: And also wrapped around my dick
Jisung:
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yeoreobunoppain · 4 years
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Jisung: In my defense, I was left unsupervised.
Chan: But wasn't Felix with you?
Felix: In my defense, I was also left unsupervised.
*after blowing up the microwave*
Hyunjin: Hyung, we need to think: how do we normally get out of these messes?
Minho: We don't. We just make a bigger one that cancels the first one out.
Jisung: Well then, time to blow up the dorm!
Chan: Minho isn't answering his phone
Jeongin: I'll call him! *calls minho*
Changbin: We've already tried calling him 9 times each, what makes you think he'll answ-
Minho: *picks up*
Hyunjin, in a stage whisper: No one can resist the maknae
Minho: *wearing a cool outfit*
Chan: I wish I could pull that off
Minho: Go ahead
Chan: what
Minho: what
*after seeing the blown-up microwave*
Chan: will you not Hyunjin this into a situation more explosive than it already is
Hyunjin: wait, did you just use my name as a verb??
*mafia au*
Chan: So, does anyone have any ideas?
Jisung: I'm not supposed to have any ideas, I'm the hot one
Minho: I'm pretty sure I'm the hot one
Changbin: I think that's me, actually
Minho: Excuse me?
Seungmin: Guys, we're all hot, but seriously does anyone have a plan??
Jeongin: Changbin-hyung! We have show-and-tell at school. Can I bring you?
Changbin: Don't expect me to dignify that with an answer
Chan: Jisung, you need to get out more and make friends
Jisung: I have plenty of friends!
Chan: Imaginary friends don't count
Jisung: :O
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yeoreobunoppain · 4 years
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Jisung: I need you to do my a weird favour without asking any questions
Felix: Isn't that the bedrock on which our entire friendship is founded?
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yeoreobunoppain · 4 years
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Minho, to Chan: Well, you know someone your age should be happy you still have hair to cut.
Jeongin: I think you look great.
Chan: Well, thank you, son I should have had.
Jisung: I should probably have a gun.
Chan: I’m not giving you a gun.
Jisung: You have a gun. The bad guy who is trying to kill me, has a gun. I think I should probably have a gun.
Jisung: *gets a gun and drops it*
Jisung: I probably shouldn’t have a gun.
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yeoreobunoppain · 4 years
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Hyunjin: I can't take waiting around like this, ya know. It's nerve wracking. My nerves are wracked, they're severely wracked. Wracked.
Minho: I could beat you unconscious and wake you when it's over.
-
*after a mini explosion*
Manager: Felix, please just tell me what happened here.
Felix: You're asking me to tell you what I wouldn't not tell you?
Manager: First, I have no idea what you just said. Second, how about you just help me help you.
Felix: Well I don't know how to help you help me tell you something if I don't know it.
-
Changbin: You didn't steal these, did you?
Jisung: No. Cloned 'em. With an RFID emulator.
Changbin: Isn't that worse than stealing?
Jisung: It's smarter.
-
*stays breaking into Chan's studio to steal his laptop*
Jeongin stans: Have you guys done something like this before?
Seungmin stans: Something dangerous or something idiotic?
Jisung stans: It's yes to both.
Chan stans: You don't have to do be part of it if you don't want to.
Felix stans: I'm not scared.
Minho stans: Well then you're borderline idiotic.
-
Hyunjin: Was that your first kiss?
Jeongin: (nods)
Hyunjin: Was it any good?
Jeongin: (nods)
Hyunjin: Want to try it again?
Jeongin: (nods)
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yeoreobunoppain · 4 years
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Hyunjin: I can't take waiting around like this, ya know. It's nerve wracking. My nerves are wracked, they're severely wracked. Wracked.
Minho: I could beat you unconscious and wake you when it's over.
-
*after a mini explosion*
FBI Agent: Sir, please just tell me what happened here.
Felix: You're asking me to tell you what I wouldn't not tell you?
FBI Agent: First, I have no idea what you just said. Second, how about you just help me help you.
Felix: Well I don't know how to help you help me tell you something if I don't know it.
-
Changbin: You didn't steal these, did you?
Jisung: No. Cloned 'em. With an RFID emulator.
Changbin: Isn't that worse than stealing?
Jisung: It's smarter.
-
*stays breaking into Chan's studio to steal his laptop*
Jeongin stans: Have you guys done something like this before?
Seungmin stans: Something dangerous or something idiotic?
Jisung stans: It's yes to both.
Chan stans: You don't have to do be part of it if you don't want to.
Felix stans: I'm not scared.
Minho stans: Well then you're borderline idiotic.
-
Hyunjin: Was that your first kiss?
Jeongin: (nods)
Hyunjin: Was it any good?
Jeongin: (nods)
Hyunjin: Want to try it again?
Jeongin: (nods)
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yeoreobunoppain · 4 years
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Seungmin: Jeongin, you studied harder for this than any of us.
Jeongin: It doesn't mean I'm gonna do good.
Seungmin: Well.
Jeongin: Well what?
Seungmin: It's do well, not good.
Jeongin: Oh heck I'm gonna fail.
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yeoreobunoppain · 4 years
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Minho, for the 127th time: Chan, can we get a cat, pretty pretty please?
Chan: No.
Chan: You wanna hear it in spanish? No.
*Chan on vacation*
Chan, trying to get himself to relax: Just relax, don't think about minho adopting another stray, or hyunjin setting the dorm on fire, or felix and jisung starting a food fight, or seungmin scaring the others in the shower, or changbin murdering one of the 00line on accident, or jeongin breaking the windows with his dolphin scream-
Chan: Oh heck I need to get home
Jisung: Hey Jeongin, what's your favourite book?
Jeongin: The Little Mermaid.
Jisung: You read that movie??
Jeongin: It was a book first
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yeoreobunoppain · 4 years
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*chan returning to the dorm after felix calls him*
Chan: You called the police before me??
Felix: I'm supposed to call you before I call the police?
Chan:
Chan: YES!
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yeoreobunoppain · 4 years
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*after a tough day*
Jeongin: I need a drink
Seungmin: Say no more, I got you
Seungmin: *fills shot glasses with water*
Jeongin: *throws back 5 shot glasses of water*
Jeongin: Ah, that hits the spot
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yeoreobunoppain · 4 years
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*after pre-debut hyunsung fight*
Jisung: Can I impale him on a stake
Chan: No.
Jisung, pleading: Not even one teeny tiny baby stab?
Chan: No, Jisung!
Jisung: What about a Changbin-sized stab?
Chan:
Chan: That might be okay
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yeoreobunoppain · 4 years
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*after someone pisses Felix off*
Felix: I'm gonna stab him with a pitchfork!
Woojin: No.
Felix: Then I'm gonna stab him with a penknife!
Woojin: No!
Felix: Then can I stab him with a pen?
Woojin: NO! NO STABBING! TALK LIKE NORMAL PEOPLE!
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yeoreobunoppain · 4 years
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*looking at God's the restaurant menu*
Seungmin: What do you want?
Hyunjin, under his breath: You
Seungmin: What?
Hyunjin, gay panicking: I SAID FONDUE
Seungmin: ... I don't think they serve fondue at chipotle?
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yeoreobunoppain · 4 years
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Jisung: *trips and falls in public*
Seungmin: I see you've set aside this time to humiliate yourself in public again
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