yappingbunny

[yappingbunny]

CW: chasers

POV your on a friend finding app and your talking to a person for a bit and then your all like "you wanna meet up by chance" and he's like nah. No problem there but before I text back saying that ok I still don't mind talking with you either way he sends uh um...

This

"I don't want to meet up with you because you haven't sent any nudes so that tells me your insecure and I don't want that"

.....

...

..

.

WHAT?!?!?!?

I have now realized that he was a chaser after taking closer looks at his texts but like what? Huh?

[yappingbunny]

So real

Day 4!

Happy Thoughts!

EDIT: I SHOULD SAY THAT I'M OKAY PPFPFFFT

[yappingbunny]

I had the most not fun nightmare, and whilst I'm used to nightmares, this one was like "Well that's new also, thanks for potentially giving me a new phobia"

Small warning what follows is a detailed description of a nightmare that's honestly giving vibes that are all like "That seems like something from Saw"

If you don't want that here is a cute picture of some cute cutness

Ok ok ok so you hit read more and all I have to say is I warned you, you silly.

Anyway, so the dream is still a little hazy, so here's the main bit. I was helping out this doctor/surgeon who was helping people with issues and whatnot. I mainly just cleaned stuff and made sure it was sanitary before the doctor did his stuff. At one point, we were talking, and he mentioned he could help me change my voice since I disliked it (voice dysphoria sucks ass). Anyway, so I agreed, and he was getting me ready for surgery. And had put the anesthesia mask on me, did the little count down and whatnot. I didn't pass out, and I let him know, and he said it's fine, and it'll hit soon. All whilst strapping me into the table/bed thingy. And despite me having said I'm not yet passed out and forced my mouth open and stuck a very long needle, with a tube attached, into the back of my throat, holy fuck did that hurt. And then he turned on some sort of blood pumping thing that started sucking my blood out. All whilst still hurting from the needle having been jammed in the back of my throat. The pumping machine eventually started struggling, which cause the needle to start jecking. Eventually, the needle was taken out, and I was released where I got up and collapsed on the ground, throwing up blood. After that, I woke up and got myself something to eat. On the bright side at least I didn't have to deal with sleep paralysis after that

[yappingbunny]

The current place I'm living at has turned off the gas for idk the reason honestly. And they said originally when they turned it off. It would only be off for about a few hours. Two days later and no gas. No gas means no cooking (cause it's a gas stove) which also means no butter noodles ahhhhhhhhhh. Me want butter noodles. I don't have time to check with management to see why gas is off.

[yappingbunny]

Ok seriously why the fuck do I continually see nsfw content although I have mature content marked as hiden. I do not care if someone does nsfw content if that's the content you want to post you do you but fuuuuuuuuck I am so tired of scrolling through reading this and that and boom!!! DICK!!! or whatever the fuck else. I am so god damn tired of adding another banned tag so that I don't have to see that content. I have blocked the nsfw tag at first thinking, "Oh yeah, this will work, no problem". But no people decide to misspell nsfw in all different ways so that it's forced on people who do not want to see that shit. For fuck sake I can't fucking scroll on tumblr in public without worrying about someone thinking I'm looking at porn because someone posted a full as nude with them spreading their ass cheeks and the fucking tags look like #n/sfw #ns/fw #nsf/w #nsft #nswt #wnsft like for fuck sake WHAT THE FUCK. Stick to one fucking nsfw tag and done or better JUST FUCKING USE #nsfw so that I don't have to continuously block all these different fucking tags because someone can't be bothered to properly tag nsfw content. If you want to do nsfw content, I have no problem. The only problem I have is when you purposely try going around the filters to force that content onto people who DO NOT want to see that content. Holy fuck is this irritating cause one there's two main problems one certain nsfw blogs aren't tagging their stuff properly and two tumblrs mature content filter doesnt work ever.

[yappingbunny]

Cuties

It went up to 90°F today. Does snuggling in front of the fan make them any cooler? Nope! But they're in love so it's fine 🥰

[yappingbunny]

Ok, ok, ok, ok, ok, ok ok ok ok ok ok ok ok ok ok ok ok ok, ok I know what I'm about to say is a little silly but uh ahem.... The job I am at right now is simply just a dishwasher job so I wash dishes. And rn I am stealthily hiding the fact that I'm trans so they don't know am girl. But one thing they have told me is that all their past dish washers (who were guys) have got out at like 11 or 12 at night, but me however I get out alongside everyone else. And my trainer is constantly being like "damn you must be really good at dishes", "htf you finish those so fast", etc....

Now I'm not saying I'm good at dishes because I am women buuuuuut.... I can see why some may think that

[yappingbunny]

Listen to the cute sounds!!!!

?????? squeaker

[yappingbunny]

I struggle telling if someone is hitting on me or like interested in any way, but I'm 63% sure my new boss might be. Technically, I'm new, so it would technically make sense that they would want to check in on the new person. But I'm not the only new person. In fact, there are 5 others that are new. But uh it seems she has been trying to spend more time with me than the other trainees and then also really trying to get to know me, to which uh you have my resume (this is a joke, kinda). And people being interested in me is nothing new but it is new that my boss is maybe interested in me. Technically, right now, until the election is over, I am in complete stealth mode cause project 2025 has me worried big time and also other stuff. So she technically sees me as a guy.... with long hair.... thick thighs.... small boobs.... kindaish feminine face/figure (just now realizing how much hrt has done to me), but still, the way I look is very guyish (which I hate). And ahhhhh, I don't know. Maybe I'm reading into it too much. I'm used to being flirted on by lesbians and well lesbians but this is kinda just newish. I don't know what my point is I'm just yapping.

[yappingbunny]

Totally wasn't cuddling my blahaj when I happened upon this

Zu'u los nok naal faal vahzah

the b in blåhaj is for bapping (and bellyrubs)

[yappingbunny]

I seen a photo (multiple photos actually) of me pre any level of transition and ewwww what the fuck why did I have to see that. I'm mean obvi I look much better now. I wouldn't go so far as to call me attractive, but thank goodness I don't look like that anymore cause gross ew no.

[yappingbunny]

I just realized why I've grown to hate my birthday so much. Cause growing up and having to be forced to stay in the closet as trans (and well also bi), or risk coming out and getting kicked out again... again, again, there's not good things that could come from it. I always used nicknames as a way to distract from my hatred/discomfort of my dead name, but even then, it still wasn't really enough (Even if it was a gender nuetral name that leaned more towards feminine). But every time, at a birthday, they sing the happy birthday song, which includes chanting the name of the birthday, whoever. And then also getting called the birthday *wrong gender* didn't help, at all. And having to sit through a song where people constantly chant something you don't want to be called makes you associate a negative experience with it. Or, in this case, my birthday. To be fair, my birthdays were already pretty lame since I wasn't marked as important enough by my mom, but still, I think the main hatred of it is due to the chanting of deadname.

[yappingbunny]

Ngl, I hate when you say "yeah therapy doesn't work it may work for others but not for me," and then everyone (ok like maybe 1 or 2 people but still) looks at you and then says, "You need therapy"...... bitch I just told you not even 5 minutes ago that I have seen 15 different therapist and this shit does not work for me. *thumps foot* But it would be nice if people can realize that although there are people that therapy helps there are also those that it can not. Do you really want me to get into the social economic bullshit of therapy or how many approaches to treat people are basically just the therapist trying to "normalize" the patient. I have seen so many therapist that have tried convincing that I should be wanting a family or get married but no do they listen when I say that those are not things I want. The only family I'll ever have or want is those I care for and bunnys (whenever I actually get my own bunnys, fuck I want a bunny, a minimum of two bunnys to be specific). Goodness now I want to rant on about therapy and this and that, but I'll leave off with is therapy just gaslighting or something?

[yappingbunny]

You ever get into a kinda passive aggressive agreement and then your like wait this is fucking stupid and dip out. Cause I just did that with someone arguing over what makes a cyoa a cyoa and they said it's only the book form essentially and I'm like no it's not, plus other words were said but that's the jest.

[yappingbunny]

I feel like transphobes are the type of people who would've actually killed Paaruthurnax and then also feel no regret or remorse for killing the bestest boy in Skyrim. To this date, I have replayed skyrim at least 20 times, and not once have I given into Delphines bullshit. Skyrim is seriously a great game. I think imma go replay it again.

[yappingbunny]

You know it's a little annoying when you just got done reading a book talking about how fucked up America's prison system is, why it is the way it is, and why it's not going to change (plus obvi more than that but you know). And then you find out right after finishing it that there is a newer up to date version (kinda not really but yes) of the book, apparently, and so now you have to read that as well. Not that the original one was bad cause it wasn't it was very amazingly laid out. But had I known there was a more up to date version, I would've just read that. Ahhhhh, fine. I'll add it to my reading list it's not like I have 160 books in my reading list, and ahhhhhhhhhhhh, my brain trembles.

The first book I was talking about that I finished is called Golden Gulag by Ruth Wilson, highly recommend it, btw.

And the new book that is going into my read list is called The Jail is Everywhere by Jack Norton, Lydia Pelot-Hobbs, and Judah Schept.

Also, if you don't like books with heavy content? (Idk if that's the appropriate word) Then you should tots read the wings of fire series by Tui T. Sutherland it has dragons and uh raaaaaawr!!!!!

[yappingbunny]

It's sucks when you only have like two moods those moods being that

1. You're too numb to feel anything and hate yourself for that

Or

2. You're in too much pain you wish you could go back to feeling numb so you don't have to deal with it