xlaurennnxbahhhx - Tumblr blog

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[xlaurennnxbahhhx]

I don’t chase people anymore. I learned that I’m here, and I’m important. I’m not going to run after people to prove that I matter.

latelycravingmore (via misjudgments)

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[xlaurennnxbahhhx]

The New Start

Lets hope this goes well

First off, i’d like to start out by saying my apologies now. I don’t know exactly where this will go, I hope in a good direction

So what I'm going to talk about tonight, is pretty much how I'm making a new start. There is only so much one can do, but I'm really going to try to do everything I can. 

On May 3rd of 2014 I was kicked out of my house for one of the most stupidest reasons. My sister and I got in the most stupid fight.. and the rest of that is history, so my fed up mother, kicked us out. Yes I was 18, so technically it was okay. Just to get a glmimpse of this, my sister and I would always argue, but hey, what do sistersdo?! My sister and I now are better than we ever were, so I'm so very thankful that that wound has healed.  Anyways, I moved in with my boyfriend and his family that same day. And thats where my life changed. I wasn't fully done with my nail technician license at the time, so getting that done and getting a completely different job was pretty stressful. I got through it though, like everything else in life. Trying to stay on topic, making a 360 in my life I lost touch with some of my closest friends, and when I think to myself to this day.. fucking sucks. Don’t get me wrong, I love my boyfriend to death and I love spending every minute with him, but having a girlfriend would be cool too, Not someone that I just met and hardly knows nothing about me, I want MY friends back. Hannah, Amy, Taylor, Kristina, Francesca, Jeanette, Avianna, Danielle, Regan, Marissa, Josalyn.. they were some of my closest friends. Growing up in school together, really having awesome times with these people! I want that all back, those summer nights of prank calling people, giggling till the morning, talking about boys, sleeping of roof tops, dancing, singing, crying, just doing girly things and everything in between! So again, trying to stay on topic, I.ve completely lost contact with these girls in the matter of 2 years, which is a very long time, but with the amount of technology we have these days, theres not a reason why I should have lost contact with these people. But the reason why I did is purely because of myself, not much of a reason, but heres where this part starts. I’m a very odd person I feel like, I don't like conflict anymore, I hate conversation, I don't like to disappoint, I ignore the important things, I have so much anxiety, I'm my own worst enemy, ever since that day I've secluded my self from everything. Ignoring people, going on Facebook and feeling sorry for myself because I’m reminiscing of all the times we've had when i see a new picture or status posted. I hardly ever update on myself on social media. But I still don't want to message any of these girls, why? Because I feel as if i’ve failed every single on of them. Like I shoved them out of my life for no reason. 2 years have passed by and I’m a totally different person. 2 years have passed by and I miss everything I had 2 years ago. But I know that it is neSt... so here it goes.. day by day, each baby step at a time I'm going to morph my new self, into my old self. Taking the good things about myself and bringing them back to 2 years ago, with baby steps. Baby steps. I can't do it all at once, but I can do baby steps for sure. 

It is not that I miss social media at all, because in this day in age its pretty stupid, I don't feel that every body needs to know everything thats going on in your life, but just little good updates would be nice. Back 2 years ago I was always on, everything that I did had to be posted to the world! I don't want to be like that, but I loved tumblr, everything about it. I used to write everything here, it was kinda like a little therapy session. So, starting new, I want to withe more in my blog, and get everything off my chest that I can't say out loud. 

But I am getting very tired and want to start a new day tomorrow. So I will be back, for sure, keeping my fellow tumblrs updated and letting my heart out to the internet. At least I don't know all of you personally! 

ttyl

[xlaurennnxbahhhx]

[xlaurennnxbahhhx]

I feel like my whole life has completely changed. More good than bad, but more happy than sad.

But I find myself in my mind at most times, in the worst times.

Not being able to say how I feel, and being afraid to say it.

Thinking about the worst that hasn't come yet.

Letting myself down. Beating myself up.

Letting my mind wander to all the wrong places.

My life has completely changed. I live with the one who has my heart.. and also the one who is my worst nightmare.. myself.

I feel like it's one of the worst places to be, you know.. inside your head.

Crazy is a very bad thing.

Being myself, is a very bad thing.

And it's hard, somedays you're happy, others you're in hell.

I want to change. But this kind of change is very difficult.

And since my life has completely changed, I think my life has to completely change, for me to change myself.

I'll be back.

[xlaurennnxbahhhx]

Please

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2 SECONDS TO REBLOG COULD SAVE A LIFE

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Posted by dreamgirl1

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So now when you do Alt + Reblog, the reblog symbol turns green, "explodes" and then disappears.

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[xlaurennnxbahhhx]

The Twilight Symphony || Zelda Reorchestrated || [download]

Disk 1

Overture - listen

Back from the Spring - listen

Ordon Village - listen

Ordon Ranch - listen

Into the Twilight - listen

Midna - listen

Hyrule Castle Overtaken - listen

Light Spirit’s Message- listen

Faron Woods - listen

Ook and the Boomerang - listen

Twilit Parasite Diababa - listen

Hyrule Field - listen

Kakariko Village - listen

Colin’s Kidnapping and the Battle of Eldin Bridge - listen

Death Mountain - listen

Goron Guardian Dangoro - listen

History of Light and Shadow - listen

Disk 2

Lake Hylia - listen

Hyrule Castle Town - listen

Rutela’s Wish - listen

Ralis, Prince of the Zoras - listen

King of Shadows - listen

Midna’s Lament - listen

Princess Zelda  - listen

Sacred Grove  - listen

Intermezzo - listen

Hyrule Field at Night - listen

Waltz of the Bugs - listen

Hyrulean Odd Jobs - listen

Fishing Hole - listen

Gerudo Desert - listen

Arbiter’s Grounds - listen

Twilit Fossil Stallord - listen

Ganondorf’s Exile - listen

Disk 3

Snowpeak Ruins - listen

Twilit Ice Mass Blizzeta - listen

Snowboarding - listen

A Door to the Past - listen

Ooccoo, Fellow Adventurer - listen

Twilit Arachnid Armogohma - listen

Hidden Village - listen

Ilia - listen

Twilit Dragon Argorok - listen

the Twilight Realm - listen

Usurper King Zant - listen

Hyrule Castle - listen

Throne of the Demon Thief - listen

Blood, Spirit, and Hatred - listen

Dark Lord Ganondorf - listen

End Credits Part I - listen

End Credits Part II - listen

[xlaurennnxbahhhx]

Tribute drawing for the 25th anniversary of The Legend of Zelda. This drawing was made by “Ag+@デザフェスG-388”.

If you like what I post, please click the “follow” button on my blog and follow me. I hope you enjoy it.

[xlaurennnxbahhhx]

PLEASE READ. WILL NOT HURT TO AND FORWARD. Kids are putting Drano, tin foil, and a little water in plastic drink bottles and capping it up - leaving it on lawns, in mail boxes, in gardens, on driveways etc. just waiting for you to pick it up intending to put it in the rubbish, but you’ll never make it!!!

If the bottle is picked up, and the bottle is shaken even just a little - in about 30 seconds or less it builds up enough gas which then explodes with enough force to remove some your extremities. The liquid that comes out is boiling hot as well. Don’t pick up any plastic bottles that may be lying in your yards or in the gutter, etc. Pay attention to this. A plastic bottle with a cap. A little Drano. A little water. A small piece of foil. Disturb it by moving it; and BOOM!! No fingers left and other serious effects to your face, eyes, etc. Please ensure that everyone that may not have email access are also informed of this. 

Snopes confirms.