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if evil why hot guy with long hair hmm? If he would kill me why is he so attractive?

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The Grabber is not husband material

No, he isn’t. He’s more like the creepy-dude-at-the-bar-who-you-know-you-shouldn’t-hook-up-with-but-you’re-drunk-and-he’s-hot-in-a-perverted-‘I’ll drool on your body’-kinda-way-and-now-he-won’t-stop-‘accidentally’-bumping-into-you-on-the-street type of guy.

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The thing i think is funny about the Grabber is the fact that this mf bought groceries just to drop them on the ground

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roman is just painful to watch sometimes because he DOES care more deeply than any of the other siblings! like fuck kendall betrayed their whole family on live tv and he brought him CINNAMON PASTRIES FROM THE AIRPORT!

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it's so important for your health and well-being to get overly attached to a fictional man who is both deeply amoral and unbelievably, pathetically sad

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succession fans scare me they're always like "did you see when cousin greg filled that risk assessment sheet ugh i literally want to keep him in a pringles tube and shake him like a noise stick"

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kendall, to the barista that accidentally maintained eye contact with him for too long: i did this for you

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Oh, I-I don’t dance. Bullshit. Yeah, you do. I can tell you wanna dance.

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If having a weird crush on John Mulaney is the equivalent of a suppressed 50s housewife having a crush on the local weather man, then having a crush on Bill Hader is the equivalent of a suppressed 50s housewife having a crush on the mailman.

There, I said it.

[xashvx]

idk might fuck around tonight and fall in love with fictional men 

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me: :(

bill hader: fuck you! true crime! that’s so rad!

me: :)

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eddie: just driving around being straight. How could I be gay. I’m driving. So heterosexual. Very straight. Look. I have a wife. And a car. I can drive. I’m straight

mike: yo remember your childhood crush richie

eddie: fuck *crashes his car*

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Euphoria (HBO, 2019-) | Barry (HBO, 2018-)

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denver: i sleep with a knife under my pillow.

tokyo: weak. i sleep with a gun.

palermo: you’re both pathetic.

tokyo: oh? what do you sleep with then??

palermo: berlin.

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Been like, a day since I finished La Casa de Papel and my mind is still shook over it. Anyway, I have no thoughts in my brain right now so I can’t articulate any of my thoughts on the show. All I can say is that I felt some spiritual disconnect between S1/2 Berlin and the S3/4 flashbacks. Like:

S1/2 Andrés: When you look into the abyss, the abyss also looks into you

S3/4 Andrés: LMAO hermanito wanna see me and Martín eat a whole pizza with our asses??? It’s gonna be amazing haha!!

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berlin: well aren't you just sugar and spice and everything nice

denver: well aren't you just rudeness and sarcasm and everything...uh...

berlin: no, go on. if you find something that rhymes with sarcasm and still makes sense, i'll stop talking

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Bae : tell me something sexy in Spanish

Me : Quiero proponerte un negocio: un atraco… un atraco singular. Estoy buscando a gente que no tiene mucho que perder. Como te suenan 2.400 millones de euro?