writermanabeng-blog

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Dear State💔

Relationship between state(South Africa) and individual (informal letter) Dear State look, its taken me a long time to gather the courage and the right words to express what I really feel and mean,so il just be honest and real...I don't think it's working out. We've been oppressed together my entire life and I just feel like Iv run out of patience waiting for you to 'change'. Your corruption and lies makes me feel like... you don't care about me. Others opions of 'us' somehow matter to you, you listened to them more than you do to me, like youv never really felt or listened too what I have too say. You legislate foriegn authorities and laws to have a final say in our relationship. You keep marginalizing the poor, And to make a situation worse, you institutionalized racism against me like you're somehow pushing me away...and I firmly thought and bought into your bull-shit when you said that was something of the past. Although Iv supported and stood by you through all your problems and empty promises, you dont appreciate me at all and its like you dictate me into submissive silence whenever I raise my voice. Im tired, and I can't keep Crossing my fingers and clutching my ass cheeks together with the firm faith that it will somehow get better...I just cant anymore. But then again, Whenever I think off leaving, I keep stumbling over repeated reasons why I tremble in love with you, trippin my over and self wor'...tripping over myself and my words because of you. I mean, who wouldn't fall for you? For your multicultural, multilingual ways? Who wouldn't be charmed by the diversity and the different colours you embrace? Who could ever deny the fact that youv been through so much rejection, hurt and pain, yet somehow youv managed to drastically change the way you was... Which made me think, if you really wanted to be great or if you cared about me, you'd stop your filthy doings. That means, your either enjoying your current situation, benefiting fat from it or you just simply never cared to begin with. It really doesnt matter no more, because iv gone past the point of feeling confused, exploited and used, but more importantly, I feel hurt by you. Iv thought it thorougher and iv thought it through...It's just not working out. And I know that I'm not the first person to ever love you or whoever will, infact some in your past literally died defending and supporting you. And maybe I was never ment to be the person for who youl change, and not ment to be the person who was able to change you, but I do hope that maybe one day, you will live up to the greatness that I know is imbreded in you. You will forever be in my Pelo Azania... P.s. with my 1st big cheque I'm moving too another country, Seeing you just dampens me in saddness Manabeng

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The Darker Brother

This blog is not for the white man or the white woman. It is not meant for the Indian man nor the Indian woman. It is not even for the coloured woman, or not even the mighty black woman. It is not being written for the fuck-boy, charmer boy or whatever kind of boy. It is not for the dead beat fathers or the black person who is hater of his own skin. I do not expect this too relate to anyone except the minority, the few true brothers left in society. The one's who still carry themselves in a respectable way, who take care of their responsibilities and are leaders of their own lives. The one's who are learning to develop a solid foundation of a family structure, the one's who dedicated their lives to taking care of what's theirs and their own. The honest one's who are cursed with the image of having hidden intentions because society no longer accepts extraordinary characteristics such as truth and honesty. These are the brothers that have it rough and hard. The world has been prejudice against us, labelled and categorized us as a group, which has left society exhaling soft forms of discrimination, racism and injustice against us. Whether it's non- verbal communication like women and men feeling threatened when we walk behind them, the way eye's follow us in certain shops, too unfair treatments and/or restriction of promotions at work. Dealing with bullies in blue uniform, institutionalised racism and economic instability is enough too break even the strongest of man. Black men are stereotyped and projected negatively, many perceptions have repeated especially in the middle and lower class where we are looked at as lazy, do not want too work, dropout fathers, criminals, uneducated (thus the accent when he speaks). We are viewed as violent, sexually and emotionally aggressive. We brash women and are always ''up to no good'' Since the rise of masculinity and patriarchy, male dominance and stereotypical behaviour have become the norm. Gents,Hypermusculanity is : ¤ A term used to describe or emphasize and highlight the physical strength and sexuality of a man ¤ The belief that violence is manly ¤ That being feminine strips you entirely off your masculinity ¤ Avoiding behaviours and attributes such as compassion and emotional expression The media has a great impact on Hypermusculanity by not only having the power to reflect cultural norms and making certain behaviours normal but also translating social reality. Racial profiling, targeting people for suspicion of crime based on their race, ethnicity, religion or national origin by law enforcement officials also affects the subconscious of how society sees us. With the rise of feminism our black mothers, sisters, and daughters see us as a threat too them. The entire structure of our everyday lives seems to be racists against us. It wasn't until I read a speech by Willie Lynch about controlling black slaves that I was convinced that the system is racist.( I erg everyone and anyone reading this to read the entire speech, I have summarized it for this blog's purpose) Willie Lynch's speech at the Riverbank’s 1712 ''¤ I have full proof, method for controlling your black slaves, I guarantee every one of you that if installed correctly, IT WILL CONTROL THE SLAVES FOR AT LEAST 300hundred years. ¤ I use fear, distrust and envy for every control purpose. ¤ Distrust is stronger than trust and envy is stronger than adulation, respect or admiration ¤ Don't forget, YOU MUST PITCH THE OLD BLACK MALE vs THE YOUNG BLACK MALE, THE YOUNG BLACK MALE vs THE OLD BLACK MALE ¤ You must use THE FEMALE vs THE MALE, THE MALE vs THE FEMALE ¤ If used intensely for one year, the slaves themselves will remain perpetually distrustful ¤ We need a black nigger man, a pregnant nigger woman and her baby nigger boy. ¤ Reduce them from their natural state in nature. • ¤ Nature provides them with the natural capacity to take care of their offspring, we break that by creating a dependency status so that we may be able to get from them useful production for business and pleasure. KEEP THE BODY TAKE THE MIND. In other words break the will to resist ¤ You must keep your eye and thoughts on the female and offspring of the nigger. If you break the female mother, she will break the offspring in its early years of development and when the offspring is ready to work she will deliver it up to you for her normal female protective tendencies will have been lost in the original breaking process. ¤ When in complete submission, she will train her offspring in the early years to submit to labour when they become of age. ¤ We have reversed the relationship in her natural uncivilized state she would have a strong dependency on the uncivilized nigger male and she would have limited protective tendency toward her independent male offspring and would raise it to be dependent like her. ¤ By her being left alone, unprotected with the male image destroyed, the ordeal caused her to move from her psychologically dependant state to a frozen independent state ¤ In this frozen state of independence she will raise her male female offspring in reversed roles. For fear of the young males life, she will physiologically train him to be mentally weak and dependent but physically strong. Because she has become physiologically independent she will train her female offspring to be psychologically independent ¤ What have you got? You’ve got the female woman out front and the nigger male behind and scared. This is a perfect situation of sound sleep economics. ¤ By throwing the female nigger savage into a frozen physiological state of independence by killing the protective male image, by creating a submissive dependent mind of the nigger male slave, we have created an orbiting cycle that turns on its own axis '' As much As I support the fact that women dersve the rights to be treated equally in this male chauvinistic current day, we cannot be blinded by the disadvantages that feminism has birthed. It has cut communication between black men and women. Women have more rights then men since the woman's liberation they have not only gained economic equality but have surpassed us. Raising a child by herself is not a natural state of a family which erects the difference between raising a child and maintaining one. Not justifying or pushing blame away for our current state as young black men, I am simply highlighting the fact that the seems to be an invisible and war waged against us and we are not turning the other cheek or fighting back, we are simply accepting these hardships which I think is wrong. We need to stop accepting them and confront them. The white man feels threatened ( as he should) by our physical and mental capabilities. Throughout history the leadership, bravery and courage of the darker brother has proven his superiority that has not been surpassed by any other civilization. Even the great racist Mahatma Ghandi was against us (research Ghandi racist speeches against black South Africans)so why should we care for any other race before our own? How can we accept others if we have not as of yet accepted loving ourselves enough to reject, refuse the way we are treated. Brothers, everyone including our own women have been turned against us. With external opinions and comments from outsiders telling us what a man is and isn't, what we should and shouldn't be. What happens to our confidence and self esteem when brothers wear dresses and call it fashion? What happens when pants live underneath buttocks? Subconsciously revealing the buttocks, a diluted invitation too homosexuality. What happens to your identity when every positive black male you see, has made it in the ''Western'' society, with nothing resembling his blackness ( facial hair, hair, beard, demographic and standard of living) We have been silenced for far too long, we have been kept suppressed, jailed, tortured, mocked, insulted, beaten and humiliated for far too long... ''We don't want to be forced into your society. I am going to be me as I am. You can beat me or jail me or even kill me, but I am not going to be, what you want me to be'' Bantu Biko

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Art

With various explanations and definitions, art reflects a deep part of our lives and times. Existence in its totality is largely based on colours, sounds,images ,feelings and aspects of spirituality which are mediums used for expression art.' An intense mode of individualism ',it safely taps a dialogue between emotion and the piece of art that is being presented. ''Creativity, being one of the closest energies we have to God'' is a large part of the creation process of art. Being able to birth a painting, a song, or a piece of writing from noting but an inspired act, reveals the true human essence trying to either communicate or express itself fully. Art stimulates certain parts of our minds and expresses visions that are beyond the capacity of mundane emotions. In today's world, it shapes people's experiences, how they address social issues and the way they deal with life. It gives us insight on other cultures and their history. Not too mention how it moulds our thinking, how we see and look at things, how we relate to one another, and how we essentially feel. Though through the times art(whether literature,sculptures, paintings, music, dance, drama and theatre) has been degraded and taken advantage off. Where co-operate and the arts meet may leave the artist without a solid foundation to live off their work. We where raised with the stigma of a starving artist, I personally believe that people who still have this type of mentality belong in the stone ages,or the bronze age where people believed the Earth was flat. Not saying there arnt any starving artists, they should leave space for those who wish to live in a new world where hard work and faith break boundaries. I cannot sit here and be ignorant to some of the artist's that have "succeeded " and are proudly spawned from South Africa. As much as someone can make a living selling water, which is a basic human need and takes up 70% of the Earths space. Why is it impossible for an artist to make a living off their work? But then again, the true fully formed artist who can withstand the test of time is rarely achieved. Why is that? Why only a few? The rock art of The San shows an outstanding insight of their way of life, and it goes off un-noticed but artists such as Picasso and van Gogh are still celebrated. Their most famous paintings where inspired by their trips and visits to Africa. At the time African art was regarded as "Dark Art" because apperantly it reflects violence and voddo Gods. I erge everyone reading to go through a painting by either Picasso or van Gogh and see the similarities of them to those of the Dark Art paintings that have been diluted in history. My point is this, who really can say an artist's work with stood the test of time? Critics or people who are inspired by their work?

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The Opposite Sex

Black women,more than any other racial group, more than any other gender affiliation are at the bottom of the respect chain. Morally negclected by society we have been led to not stand up for women. In today's world, it is acceptable and in the norm to be naive towards; the negative image that black women are portrayed in,their problems and sexism that not only happens in leadership but within a relationship.

We live in a world where women are projected as money hugging sex symbols. It is obvious that with all the universal negativity in social media, media and restriction to history, society would look at women as less, including themselves. But these are the same women who marched for pass laws on August 1956, in South Africa some 15 000-18 000 plus, the same women who fought for their right to hold public office,own property and earn fair wages. The same women who marched against mass rapes in October 2010, which the rape had become increasingly prevalent in the country of Congo during the war. These are the same women who where the rightful heir to the throne of Ancient Kermit.

Though I am mentioning a few impacts women made in history, there are a lot more rulers and warrior’s who conquered men. There are far more marks women left in history then we are currently led to believe. Sadly though, this does not change the fact that today women are victimised, sodomized at a young age, victims of physical, emotional and mental abuse, gender inequality , sexism and general oppression.

Although women empowerment emphasises and excersices the rights that rightfully belong to women, it is an unavoidable fact that it separates communication of a struggle between the women and men. During Aparthied (I will use this as an example being a citizen of South Africa)men and wonen stood up together to fight for a common cause. Now women are fighting certain struggles alone, and so are men. As a result of this separation of struggles, communication weakened. Unstable families and relationships,children raised by single mothers and relationships not resolved are proof of miscommunication between the black man and black woman. I am beginning to believe that the system is systematically structured to separate the two.

Though it was not until one of my closest friend who is a female expressed certain experiences that women undergo,I understood that women are still objectified and which motivated me to write this blog. She expressed the vulnerability she felt from cat calling, having to walk somewhere and have different men who are physically bigger exhale vile remarks, staring, yelling out car windows,some even brave enough to grab parts of her, mentally undressing and the asking of numbers(regardless of dress code). On a night out with her classmates, standing at the bar awaiting service, she felt a hand from behind her that went up her skirt while the middle finger was aiming toward her vigina. Before completing he’s mission, she turned aggressively and confronted him which he met by simply brushing it off and offered to buy her a drink.

Sexism exists largely on all levels. Although oppressed, negclected and harassed women still do not cease to amaze me. In one of my previous blogs ’ My Generation’ I emphasized on the movements that largely involved Melliniums, little did I know then that all if not most of the strikes are led by Women… #feesmustfall - Nompendulo Mkhatswa the current president of the SRC at Wits. Alongside Karabo Marutha and Shaeera Kallar former SRC president at Wits. #blacklivesmatter- Alicia Garza, Opal Tometi, and Patrisse Cullors #rememberkhwezi - Amanda Mavuzo, Naledi Chirwa, Samkele Dlakavu and Lebogang Shikwambane #ptagirlshigh - Zulaikha Patel (and for all those who where involved but not mentioned)

At the end of the day my opinions about this topic are limited because I am a male, I can never fully comprehend or understand women and what they have to go through. But I can hopefully share a little light and insight that no matter how degraded women are, they are stronger then we think…

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Communimcation

Communication amongst people exceeds that of simply trying to get a message across. It is deeper than the mundane casual chit chat converse we share amongst each other. Although we may converse for various semiotic reasons, to be understood, to feel revalant, to instruct, insult, ask or tell, it all boils down to intangible emotions that we try to express. A lot of those feelings though,go off unexplained When two people are talking, the one listening is in a state of trying to understand or relate. The one speaking is trying to explain something abstract and intangible. How the person listening relates entirely on past experiences that they have been through and that influences how they perceive it. When introduced to New information, the same thing occurs ,the person introducing it (whether written or verbal)is expressing it from their own understanding of it. A lot of the experiences we tell through storytelling cannot fully amount to that exact feeling or moment experienced. An experience that lasted hours could be summarized in a few min when conversating with a friend. The rest of the abstract feelings are left unsaid. Human beings have a need for belonging, an unfilled desire to connect to the next . As if talking and writing are not enough ,we have based our entire development of technology in and around communication. From the drawing rock art of the Khoisan ,Hieroglyphics in Egypt to the telephone,internet ,texting, Skype calls, time and space are no longer an issue when reaching a person half way across the world only to fill that desire to commune,it is what we live for. I personally believe the true core or root of communication would be that of emotional connection, where one would feel the hunger or love without having to be to told or explained..."it's fun to dream"

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My Generation

As a product of this current generation, manufactured by democracy it is one of the greatest times to be young,more importantly to be alive. The youth have always been at the forefront of radical change in every generation. Being a citizen of a diverse country such as South Africa of which the population is largely made up of youth (ages 14-35), it is not difficult to see societal, environmental and economical change (regardless of whether it’s positive or negative change). Being apart of the global youth, it is not difficult to see a shift in consciousness.

We are blessed to have access to information more then any other generation before us. We have been fortunate to be born after apartheid, we are blessed to be born at a time where we lived through a vibration sequence (in 2012). The youth of today are more highly intelligent then previous decades. Whether this is because of the internet,social media or other forms of recival information,it does not really matter. What does matter is the drastic lenghts that the current generation are willing to go to be heard. As a country, South Africa has witnessed 4strikes in the space of 2years, which largely involved the youth : #feesmustfall (2015) #pretoriagirlshigh (2016) #rememberkhwezi (2016) #feesmustfall (2016) Is this not proof that something is happening collectively, with a just cause?

Though blessed with opportunities, easy access to internet and technology,it comes with a great cost. We are seen as a self obsessed generation, who can’t live without our smart-phones, Selfie taking addicts and egotistical. -Youth unemployment is higher than ever in our country, 70% total in 2009 -Ignorance is at its peak -Alcohol and drug consumption and addiction -H.I.V and AIDS and we still make time for internal negative manifestations : -Peer pressure -Incorrect Career Decisions -Self Loathing -Fear of Commitment

Arguably,South Africa is a developing country and the problems we are faced with are evidence of that, thus expected to happen. Although solutions are being chanted, shouted and echoed by the youth but are shut down by corruption and those in power, majority of which are the older generation. Change has always been met with resistance.

I may be seen as being optimistic, but I believe that we will be better leaders than those who are in power currently. Never before has there been a youth of more creativity ,flexibility ,open-mindedness, and a strong sense of social responsibility than that of Melliniums. Whichever route this world takes, we will be fortunate to see which way it goes,but we won’t live long enough to fully experience that change. Thus this has to be the greatest time be alive…when things are just beginning

shout out to Black Lives Matter #r.i.p.remeberkhwezi

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The Mighty Wall (Soliloquy)

Wall!! Why wont you move mara ye?

I pushed you down until my legs became a shovel to the ground behind me.

Punched you until my knuckles cracked, bled and I broke both my hands. I kicked you down till my toes nearly broke-fell out.

Going back is no more living in my mind! This right side, you are so long you come right around, on the left you are so long your forever and infinity put together.

Tore my nails off trying to climb over, Dug under until I started seeing sparks of lavar. Prayed to you to move but it echoed into White nothings.

Climb over, Go left or right. Go through or dig under Can’t go back either…

But we are both made of vibration, We will just see who is more mentally stronger…