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Heartland Season 18 Finale Tralier

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Namy Nuggets (13/13)

A fanfic collection of Amy and Nathan scenes from CBC’s Heartland. (Catch up on the series here) A big special thank you to @heartlandians, @1299sblog, @smokinholsters, @kvanbooven, and @scoutbooradley for being so supportive and enthusiastic towards me and this story. It means a lot. I shared this story because I was incredibly fun and enriching for me to write and—after many months, I finally decided that other people would/could enjoy it. Even though this last 'nugget' is more stressful than fluffy, I feel like it properly concludes the arc that I was trying to tell and leaves them in a good, strong place. I thought/was hoping another arc for Nathan/Amy would come to me before I finished posting all the completed chapters. It hasn't. One reason is probably because the show's season 18 is unusually stressful this year. So, we'll see if I come up with another arc for Amy/Nathan during the show's next long hiatus. Thank you so much to all who have enjoyed this story. Without further ado: Nugget #13: Across the Fence

“Come on, Shadow,” Amy leads him out the Heartland barn and out to the fields on a gallop. The fast pace helps clear her head after a going the entire weekend without hearing from Nathan once. She busied herself with Lyndy and client horses, trying to convince herself everything was fine with Nathan and his own ranch work kept him busy.

Perfectly understandable, she tells herself as Shadow races down a sloped hill, he has a big ranch to run, and, she shakes her head, we don’t have to talk every day anyway. We don’t have to be that type of couple that talks all the time, do we? She slows Shadow to a canter and takes a turn, we don’t…but we have been ever since we’ve got together.

The fence that separates Heartland from Nathan’s land appears before her. Shadow continues his forward path until he reaches the barrier and naturally turns to follow the fence line. As he does so, Nathan’s truck comes into focus. Amy’s heart patters at the sight, at the opportunity to see him.

She slows Shadow to walk and takes her time to approach. The truck door slams and Nathan appears, carrying fence posts in his arms and his hands full of tools. Before he reaches the truck’s flatbed to put everything down, though, his gaze falls on Amy.

She smiles warmly at him, “Hey.”

He nods before turning to set down the posts and the tools on the flatbed. Now with free hands, he takes a deep breath and turns back to her. “Hi.”

Amy waits for him to say more. He doesn’t. So, she tries, “How’s it going?”

“Busy,” he leans against the truck’s flatbed, half-sitting on it. “Just busy.”

“Yeah, work must have been piling up,” Amy softly offers him an out before adding, “I didn’t see you all weekend.”

“Yeah, I know,” Nathan sighs. “But Heartland always seems to be bustling with visitors, so I’m sure you were busy too.”

Amy retreats at the snide remark, so out-of-character for him. She takes a beat to decide what to do, and then pulls her leg over to hop off Shadow. She stands across the fence from him. “You’ve never been one for flippant insinuations,” one eyebrow raises with the observation. “You want to try being straight with me?”

Outwardly, he shakes his head and scoffs in disbelief. Inwardly, he layers the disbelief with amazement at her forthrightness and maturity, all of which add to the fear that he spent all weekend trying to avoid.

He crosses his arms. “Why didn’t you tell me about Scott and Ty?”

“Scott?” she repeats, incredulous. “Are you kidding me? You’re mad because I didn’t tell you Scott was close to Ty?” When he doesn’t respond, she questions further, “Why does it matter?”

“It matters to me, Amy,” he states stronger. “And I’m not mad. I just don’t think it’s fair to me to be caught off guard like that.”

“Caught off guard by the fact that Scott was a sort of mentor to both of you or that Scott and Ty were close at all?”

He shakes his head again and uncrosses his arms to gesture down the field. “You told me half the story. You said he dated Lou and conveniently left out the fact that he was mentor to Ty.”

Amy gapes at him. “We were in the middle of dinner with your friends!”

“And you didn’t think to tell me about it later?”

The question surprises her, quelling her defensives. “No, honestly,” her tone softens. “I don’t think about Scott that much.”

Nathan scoffs. “You put me in position where I was out of the loop at dinner—with Scott, with Lyndy—”

Amy retracts. “With Lyndy?”

“Yes!” He stands from the truck and takes a step closer. “You should have seen the way Scott was looking at Lyndy—interacting with her—it was so delicate, like she was so precious to him and he was trying to soak up every moment with her…like,” Nathan cocks his head, emphasizing his point, “Like she reminded him of someone that meant a lot to him—and I watched them together, and I totally didn’t get it.”

“Okay. So,” She works hard to keep her body calm and her voice soft. “What would you like me to tell you Nathan? Should I go around the ranch with you, pointing out people and places that meant something to Ty?” She raises her flat palm as if she is presenting something, her voice changes to mimic a tour guide. “‘This is the truck that meant the world to us and here’s why,’ oh and ‘this is Clint, here’s why he’s so important to Ty,’ and oh ‘here’s where he—’”

“Okay, Amy,” he puts his hand out. “I got it. I only meant that Scott already came up between us and you didn’t say anything.  You knew my history with Scott and you didn’t mention that it was similar to Ty’s history with him during or after the dinner with Josh.”

She shakes her head. “It’s really not that similar.”

“Amy…Come on…” he warns incredulously before turning his back to her and returning to his truck.

She follows him. “Why does this matter so much to you? Please tell me why you’re picking a fight with me just because I didn’t tell you that Scott had a history with Ty.”

He turns back to her and they stand facing each other parallel to the truck’s flatbed. “It matters to me that Ty and I have something in common other than you and Lyndy. And it matters to me that you left me out of the loop at dinner with Lou and Scott.”

“Okay,” Amy relaxes and surrenders. “Okay. I hear you. I’m sorry.” Nathan nods his acceptance of her apology. “I just—” she surprises them both by continuing what seemed like a finished conversation. He places a hand on his hip. She takes a deep breath, “I thought we just agreed the other day that we were talking too much about Ty. Nathan, I don’t want us to talk him all the time.”

“For who?” He challenges her lightly. “For you or for me?”

“Honestly, Nathan,” she speaks gently. “For both of us…and he’s been coming up a lot lately—and I’m happy to tell you about him and give you a few key points in my history with Ty—but not everything. I don’t want to live in the past, I don’t want to be in that headspace all the time. I want a relationship with you and I want to build our own history together.” She lets the words sink in for a moment. “But look at us—we having our first fight—and it’s over Ty.”  She steps back in reflection. “Really? I don’t want that.”

He shakes his head. “This isn’t about Ty,” he clarifies with confidence. “This is about you not telling me relevant information.” He pauses to make his point. In the silence, he figures out the best way to express himself. Softening, he starts, “I meant what I said when I told you I want you to feel like you tell me things. Amy, I want to know what’s important to you, what you’re thinking about when things come up—and not be out of the loop, lost on the important subtext or implications in a conversation.”  

“Okay,” she agrees softly. It takes her a moment to realize Nathan’s concern over her withholding information from him is something Ty would repeatedly get upset with her about. She takes a single step closer. “You’re right. That’s fair.”

“Thank you,” he reaches out to touch her for the first time that day, resting a hand on her shoulder. “And for the record, I never minded hearing about Ty.”

“Why?” She asks, amazed at his kindness and empathy. “Why don’t you mind it?”

“Because,” his thumb strokes her shoulder and he smiles. “I love hearing about your life and I love getting to know you. I don’t think you know how incredible you are, but I do know that Ty is a big part of that, so that’s okay to acknowledge.”

“You’re pretty incredible too, you know.” Unsure, Nathan gives her the side-eye, but she nods, reaching for him, and closing the distance between them. She wraps her arms around his torso and leans further into him. “Yes, you are,” she nods and brings her lips to his cheek for a meaningful kiss. “Thank you for being so kind and understanding,” she whispers.

[writeonthrough]

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Namy Nuggets (12/13)

A fanfic collection of Amy and Nathan scenes from CBC’s Heartland. (Catch up on the series here)

Nugget #12: Scott Comes to Visit

"Here's some water," Lou offers Nathan a glass after a long day working together in the fields.

"Thanks." He takes the glass and takes a sip. "And thank you for all your help today. You really didn't need to do all that."

"My pleasure. Easy to do when dad and grandpa are away. And," she shrugs, "I figure I owe you plenty." She turns to pour him a glass of water.

"Lou," Nathan waits for her to face him again. "Can we maybe," he pauses, unsure how to phrase it. He tries, "Get past that night in high school? I mean, we're balancing our two families' cattle businesses, you are one of few people who know about Amy and I—and I just don't want that night to hang between us like you owe me anything."

"I wasn't talking about that night, Nathan." She shakes her head slightly and he notices the sincerity behind her eyes. Lou takes a deep breath. "I know my dad and grandpa can be overly harsh and I've watched you deal with them with a gentle steadiness, which makes a difference. Plus," she nods her head towards the barn. "You've made my sister happier than I've seen her in years and I, well, I've let her down a couple of times in the last few years, so—Thank you."

Nathan nods. "Yeah," he says softly. Still surprised at her kind words, he doesn't know what else to say other than, "You're welcome."

The screen door screeching open interrupts the moment. "Okay, Mom!" Katie and Lyndy walk into the kitchen. "We set the table outside."

"Thank you, girls." She walks to the fridge and starts pulling out food. "Nathan, do you want to stay for dinner? It's just leftovers, but Jack, Tim, and Lisa are gone, so at least it's simple."

Lyndy walks over to Nathan and looks up at him. He watches a sweet expression form; her eyes twinkle and a small smile appears. "Please stay, Nathan."

Lou and Nathan break into smiles at the same time. His heart melts at Lyndy's request. "Of course, I will," he promises Lyndy. Then he looks up at Lou, "Thanks for the invite."

"Sure." Already on to the next thing, Lou hands Katie some serving plates. "Can you take these out, sweetie? And Lyndy—"

The screen door screeches open again. Voices carry through the entryway before people appear. "I'm really happy with his progress, Amy."

"That's great to hear. Thanks, Scott."

"Scott!" Lou exclaims. "I didn't know you were here. Good to see you."

"You too."

"We were just getting ready to eat. Care to join?"

"I'd love to. I can't say no to a Heartland dinner," Scott teases as he gazes from Lou to Amy. "Why else would I make Heartland my last stop of the day?"

Nathan watches as smiles break out around the kitchen. His gaze focuses on Amy as she places her hand on Scott's shoulder. "You know you're welcome for dinner anytime, Scott."

Amy catches Nathan's gaze. "Uh, Scott. Do you remember Nathan?" Her hand gestures between them. "I think—"

"Oh, wow," Scott reaches a hand out to Nathan and Nathan takes it with a smile. "Nathan Pryce Jr. It's been a minute. This takes me back to high school."

"Hey, Scott." Nathan nods and releases his hand. "Good to see you."

Lou takes a step between them, looking from one man to the other. "You two know each other?"

"Ah, Lou," Scott puts a hand on the small of Lou's back. "I was Nathan's rodeo captain."

She narrows her eyebrows at him. "What are you talking about?"

"You came to practice all the time, Lou."

"I don't remember this—"

Nathan watches their interaction and remembers he had the same reaction to Josh at dinner the other night. He notes the irony and then parts his lips to explain.

"Mommy," Lyndy interrupts. "I'm hungry."

Scott crouches down to meet Lyndy. "Lyndy Borden," He reaches out and starts tickling her. She bursts out laughing. "Did you say you were hungry?"

"Yes! Ahhh!" Lyndy giggles. "You're tickling me!"

"Well, you must be hungry," Scott stops tickling her and gives her a hug. "You're a growing girl," he combs his fingers through her hair and tucks a strand behind her ear. He lowers his voice. Emotions fill his tone as he whispers, "Every time I see you, you're bigger."

Nathan's brow wrinkles as he watches the interaction. He notices a certain love and melancholy in Scott's tone and expression that he can't quite place.

Lyndy holds onto him, keeping him crouched beside her. "I'm going to be eight soon."

As they talk, Lou directs the rest to bring out different food dishes and drink options. Nathan hardly notices the commotion, though, still somewhat transfixed and confused by Scott and Lyndy. He thought Lou and Scott had the most history in the room.

"I know," Scott assures her. He adjusts Lyndy's shirt, realigning it after his tickles had twisted it around. "On September 29th."

Lyndy's eyes grow bigger. "You know my birthday?"

"Hmm," Scott nods. "I know your birthday."

"Lyndy," Amy re-enters the kitchen. "Guys! Dinner is served. Are you coming?"

The Canadian summer night serves as the perfect backdrop for Nathan's first dinner at the ranch. Dishes pass hands and he serves himself, enjoying the company and natural chatter that comes with a bigger family. Even without Jack, Tim, and Lisa, Nathan understands why Scott would rearrange his schedule to have dinner here when he could.

"So, Scott," Lou starts. "You were Nathan's rodeo captain in high school?"

Scott and Nathan glance at each other before answering. "Only for a year. He was a decent bronc rider, even better student."

"Thanks," Nathan takes a sip of water and then his brow furrows. "I think."

"No, no," Scott laughs. "I mean…you're a really good listener. Sure, you had good instincts in the shoot, but from what I remember—you incorporated feedback really well. You listened to, not just me, but the whole coaching team, and took your time to think about how best to do what we advised you to do."

The whole table is silent for a moment at Scott's high praise. After another moment, Nathan recovers and is able to say, "Thanks, Scott."

Lou turns to Amy, and the two share a meaningful look. To avoid noting the irony of how Scott had mentored both Ty and Nathan, they look away from each other. Amy turns to help Lyndy and Lou takes a bite of her pasta salad.

"So, Amy…" Scott fills the silence. "I looked over the upcoming dates for the youth clinic fundraisers you sent me. I think I can make the fall one work."

"Oh, great." She perks up. "Thank you. That means a lot."

The mysterious image of Ty and his youth clinic sends a jolt through Nathan. He tilts his head from side to side, trying to figure it out.

"I didn't know you asked Scott to speak." Lou nudges Amy. "That's actually pretty perfect."

"I'm happy to," Scott shares.

"Why?" Nathan blurts out before he can help himself. When everyone looks at him in surprise, he watches Amy's eye drift down. He tries to recover gently. "I mean…sorry," he catches himself. Then, his expression softens along with his tone of voice. "Why is it perfect for Scott to speak?"

"Oh, sorry," Lou starts, "Scott was also a foster kid and he was really close to Ty, so—" She stops and looks at Scott.

Nathan turns from Lou to Amy. "What?"

"It's not a big deal." Scott takes a drink of water before turning to Nathan and explaining. "I, uh, was one of Lou and Amy's Mom's strays. Marion took me in when I was in high school with you guys and I had nowhere to go and she taught me about horses. Years later she did the same thing for Amy's husband Ty." Nathan nods in the information he already knew about Ty. "I obviously stayed close to the family and ended up bonding with Ty and mentoring him as a vet throughout most of his time at Heartland. So, Amy asked me to speak because I'm close to both foster youth and Ty."

"Ah, okay." Nathan blinks in the information. "That makes more sense."

He turns to Amy. She notices the hurt in his expression, he notices the regret in hers. "Sorry," she whispers.

"Yeah…" he responds under his breath. "You could have said something at Josh's."

Amy turns further towards him, blocking off the rest of the table. "I didn't want Ty to interfere with our night."

He shakes his head. His eyelids drift down and he adjusts his napkin as a distraction.

"Oh," Scott's gaze darts between Amy and Nathan. "Wow. You two?"

Lou breaks into a wide smile. She gives Scott a playful nudge. "I said the same thing!"

Scott engages with Lou, sharing a smile between them. "Really?"

"Okay," Amy reaches for the bread basket, purposely blocking off Lyndy and Katie. "Kids at the table."

Katie looks up from the drawing with Lyndy that she picked up to distract her from the conversation almost as soon as they all sat down. "We didn't hear anything. We working on drawing the barn at sunset."

As the rest of the table turns to praise Lyndy's art skills, Nathan's face falls.

Suddenly he questions whether his time building trust and a bond with Amy at their birch tree spot mattered at all…especially when he could so easily feel left out of the loop in casual family dinners and upcoming meaningful events.

[writeonthrough]

Namy Nuggets (11/13)

A fanfic collection of Amy and Nathan scenes from CBC’s Heartland. (Catch up on the series here)

Nugget #11: Evening Plans

It's seven o'clock before Nathan finishes his work for the day. As he watches the cows take their rest at the end of the day, his mind debates between his evening plans. He imagines his dad, alone in their half-lit kitchen, trying to convince himself he still has the cooking skills he once did. His mind then drifts to Amy. He can't help wondering, imagining, how her evening is going. He wonders if most of her evenings are the same; a huge family dinner followed by putting Lyndy to bed—or how often her routine is spontaneous.

Before he can venture a guess, however, he finds himself galloping towards Heartland. Powder races across the open fields and Nathan enjoys the beautiful summer night—the Sun still up in the sky and the birds flying across the skyline. He swivels around birch trees and enters Heartland property, happily anticipating what he will find there.

He's not disappointed when he rides up to find Amy alone in the round pen. The rest of the place is deserted, which makes it simple for him to ride straight to her.

Amy turns at the sound of hoofbeats. "Hey!" The entirety of her face brightens when she sees him. "I didn't expect to see you tonight."

"Hey," He pulls Powder to a stop and watches her walk towards him. "I wasn't expecting to come over."

"Oh, well…" She climbs up the round pen fence and sits at the top to meet him at eye level. "It's good to see you," she says sweetly before leaning forward for a kiss. He smiles and meets her willingly, stretching his neck out to kiss her more fully.

He pulls back. "You too." He gestures to the horse in the ring. "Who's this guy?"

"Tory. New client horse. He arrived this afternoon, I'm just getting to know him."

"Huh," Nathan inspects the horse. "He looks pretty good. What's his story?"

"After a year as a good police horse, he's suddenly afraid of loud noises. They say no major incident happened. He was perfect on Friday and after a weekend in the field as usual, he came in all freaked out on Monday."

"Sounds like a puzzle," Nathan offers.

"That's one word for it," Amy smiles. "I'll figure it out eventually."

"I'm sure you will." Nathan smiles back. "Hey," he reaches for her arm. She reciprocates by taking his own arm gently stroking it with her hand. "Did you already put Lyndy to bed? Are you—"

"Amy!"

They release each other at the calling of her name. Amy turns on top fence rail to see Caleb running in her direction.

He walks up to the opposite side of the round pen and climbs the wood railing. "Hey. Why didn't you tell me about your concert tonight?"

Nathan does a double take at the idea of Amy performing a concert. His interest peaks and his longing to hear her sing reawakens.

"It's not my concert, and it's not a big deal, and," she gestures to his truck, "You said you had to leave tonight, so why would I—"

"Come on," Caleb tilts his head as if the answer were obvious. "You're an amazing singer and-"

"Okay…that's a bit of a stretch there, cowboy." Amy rolls her eyes and downplays her talent. Caleb, she thinks to herself, thinks I'm amazing at everything, so it doesn't mean much.

Caleb ignores her. "I love hearing you sing—"

"It's not just me, Caleb. Katie wants to try leading for a song—"

"Yeah, I heard her practicing. She sounds great."

"Caleb. Do not make a big deal out of this. I just want to go have some fun for an evening, blow off some steam."

Nathan notes the diametrical ways Amy and Caleb describe the same event. Caleb's high praise and excitement stand in stark contrast to Amy's quiet humility.

"Yeah," Caleb promises. "So do I."

Amy rubs her temple, unsure. "Caleb…"

"I can postpone my drive for a few hours." He quickly offers. "They said you guys are going on at 9?"

"Yeah." She pauses and then adds, "If you're coming, you're not driving back tonight. Ask Lou for a dude ranch key."

Caleb breaks into one of his wide, over-excited smiles. "Thank you!"

As he climbs down the fence, Nathan can't help but speak out. "Caleb, where is this thing?"

"No—" Amy tries interjecting.

"At the Blue Bull Bar, downtown," he says, jumping off the second railing pole and turning back towards the house.

With Caleb's back turned, Nathan returns to Amy's side, riding closer and resting an arm on her leg.

He tilts her head at her, teasing, "Anything you want to tell me?"

"Uh..." Amy decides to ignore Caleb's interruption and picks up where they left off. "I did actually put Lyndy to bed. But, as it turns out, I don't think I'm free to do anything with you tonight, so…"

"No, apparently, you have very amazing plans for tonight."

"No," she pulls her leg back from his hand. "Not amazing. Blow-off steam, low-stakes kind of plans."

"Hey," Nathan points to himself. "I like low-stakes kind of plans."

"Nathan," Amy's head drops. "Come on. My whole family's gonna be there—"

"It's a public place. I can hide in the crowd."

"You haven't heard me sing before…and I wasn't planning on like—I don't know—having you there tonight."

Nathan retreats. "Do you really not want me to come?"

"No, it's not that," Amy clarifies. "I don't want to worry about you being there."

"Because of your family?"

"No, because…" She can't find any new words to express her hidden vulnerability and secret desire to impress him. Her repeated words come out as a breathless whisper, inundated with meaning, "You haven't heard me sing before."

Nathan's breath catches at her confession. He nudges Power closer to the railing and he reaches out to her, his arms encircling her waist. As he leans in for a kiss, he notices that, even with her eyes closed, her face reveals all her hidden emotions. When their lips touch, he feels the love she's holding inside.

[writeonthrough]

Namy Nuggets (10/13)

A fanfic collection of Amy and Nathan scenes from CBC’s Heartland. (Catch up on the series here)

Nugget #10: Dinner with Friends

Nathan pulls into the driveway, shuts off the engine, and turns to Amy beside him. As she looks over at his friend's house, he notices her natural beauty for the third time tonight. Dressed in simple jeans and a flowy top, the waves in Amy's hair tonight tumble gracefully down her back.

"You ready?" Nathan asks and offers her a small smile. "It shouldn't be too bad. They're nice people."

"Huh," she looks knowingly at him. "Are you trying to reassure me or yourself?"

Nathan laughs. It quickly fades at the realization of how well she now knows him. He grows somber, looking down, back at her, and then down again.

Amy reaches for his hand on the seat and squeezes it. "It'll be fine. I'm looking forward to meeting your friends."

She releases his hand to exit the truck and he does the same, quickly rounding the front of the truck to walk beside her.

A white picket fence outlines a large front yard to a yellow two-story farmhouse. The outside picnic table is covered with a blue tablecloth and set for four. Amy notices a tall tree in the corner of the yard with a tire swing. Behind it, the sun is halfway in the sky, preparing to go down within the next two hours, and she smiles, feeling comfortable in Nathan's familiar corner of the world.

"Welcome, Welcome," Amy turns to find Nathan's friends walking out to meet them.

"Hey Nathan," Josh reaches out and takes his hand. "Good to see you."

"Hey Josh," He turns to Josh's wife and smiles at her, "Hannah." He reaches out to Amy and she steps forward. "This is Amy."

Amy smiles. "It's nice to meet you both." She briefly shakes both of their hands. "You have a beautiful home."

"Thank you," Hannah says sweetly.

The four of them stand still for a moment. "Uh," Josh clicks into hostess gear. "Come in, come in. I'm just going to get the grill going."

They follow Josh into the front yard and Amy spots the grill on their small patio.

Hannah stops at the porch stairs. "What can I get everyone to drink? We have beer, wine, seltzer."

Josh perks up from the grill. "A beer for me, honey."

"Me too," Nathan adds.

"Amy?" Hannah asks with a friendly expression.

"Oh, just water for me. Thanks."

"You sure?"

"Yeah. Thanks."

As Hannah skips up the front steps, Nathan moves closer to Amy, placing a hand on the small of her back. He meets her gaze and tries to gather any information or feeling she has from that small interaction, but he is only met with an uncomplicated smile.

Josh pulls out the Pryce beef package and shows it to Nathan. "Only the best beef for tonight."

Nathan nods in approval. "I would expect as much."

Josh chuckles. He sets down the package to open it. Without looking up, he asks. "Amy, are you enjoying Nathan's beef?"

Nathan shakes his head and Amy lets out a chuckle. "I actually eat Heartland beef myself."

"Oh, that's right." Josh lifts his head and smirks as he motions between them. "We got ourselves a little Romeo and Juliet situation on our hands."

"Okay," Nathan raises his palm, warning, "Let's not get overly dramatic here."

Amy defends him. "Nathan likes to insist he is only friendly competition."

"Oh, I see," Josh teases. "And you buy that?"

"Hey," Nathan interjects, standing up for himself.

"I like to stay out of the beef business," she tells Josh.

"How diplomatic of you." Josh puts the last steak on the grill. "And what does your family think of this whole—" He motions between them for a second time. "Situation?"

"Uh—" Amy starts, but is thankful to be interrupted by Hannah rejoining the group.

"So, Amy," Hannah passes out the beers to Josh and Nathan before taking a swig of her own. "You don't drink?"

"Hannah." Nathan's eyes widen in warning.

"It's fine," Amy smooths the moment over with a smile. "Yeah, I don't drink."

"Recovering alcoholic?"

"Not me," Amy says simply. "It just tore my family apart when I was a kid."

Hannah's eyelids fall over her in regret. "I'm such a jerk. I'm so sorry."

"No biggie," she brushes it off and takes a sip of water. After a few moments, true silence enters the group and Amy realizes she is the best person to break it. "Josh, you grew up with Nathan?"

Relief floods over the group as Josh replies, "Yeah. We participated in the rodeo school together as kids."

Amy nods. "Oh, fun."

Josh continues, "We did rodeo all through high school together too—well, until he left—joined the high school team and everything."

"Was the rodeo school different than the high school team?"

"Well," Nathan starts. "It was led by a captain, a peer, rather than a coach."

"Oh, right," Amy looks between them. "And did you prefer having a captain or coach?"

"A peer captain was nice," Nathan shrugs. "More of an equal."

"I liked our captain," Josh adds.

Amy asks, "Who was your captain?"

"Uh…" Josh tries to think. "Scott Cardinal, I think. At least in Grades 9 and 10."

Nathan notices a wide smile break on Amy's face. He's both enchanted and mystified by it. "What? What's so funny?"

Amy shakes her head. "Scott's a close family friend. He dated my sister for a while."

"Really?" Josh says in disbelief.

"Oh, no way," Hannah joins in. "That's wild."

Josh tries to think back. "Oh, my, gosh, your sister is Lou Fleming?"

Amy nods and raises her eyebrows. "The one and only."

"Wow, I remember now," Josh shares. "She would come to watch practice sometimes. They were really an item."

Nathan scrunches up his face. "I don't remember any of that."

"Man, it was after you left." Josh nudges him. "That's why. I think they were seniors at that point."

"That sounds right," Amy confirms.

Josh turns his attention back to the steaks. He tests them out with a fork one by one and then declares. "Steaks are done." He plops each one on a serving plate. "Honey, is the salad on the table?"

"Brought it out with the drinks."

"Perfect," Josh says. He makes his way to the picnic table and the rest of them follow with drinks still in hand. They take their seats and start passing around the food.

"The steak is really good, Nathan," Hannah says, already eyeing her second bite.

"Hey," Josh speaks over Nathan's thanks. "I cooked it."

"Yeah, but," Hannah points her fork at Nathan. "He produced it."

"I think you pay compliments to the cook," Josh teases.

Hannah teases back, "I think you pay compliments to the guests."

Josh smiles and then changes the subject. "Amy, Nathan tells me you work with horses. How long have you been doing that?"

"Uh…a long time," Rather than do the math, Amy answers, "Since I was fifteen."

"Wow," Josh exclaims, finding new respect for her. "When Nathan and I were fifteen we spent our free time racing tractors and trying and failing to do wheelies with our dads' trucks."

Amy turns to Nathan, amused, "Did you really?"

Nathan shakes his head, "Trying and failing. You heard him say failing, right?" Amy chuckles.

Josh picks up the conversation. "You've really trained horses since you were a teenager? What—you didn't go around chasing around farm chickens with the rest of us?"

"Hey," Amy raised her hands and then gestures to herself. "I have chased my fair share of farm chickens."

"Huh-uh." Josh teases her. "What else do you do for fun?"

"For fun?" Amy challenges him. "On a busy working ranch with multiple family businesses in full swing?"

"Come on." Hannah insists. "You must do something just for fun, just for you."

"Um," Amy thinks. "Fun for me. Um, I have a really cool daughter who is fun to hang out with. I ride my horse out in the foothills all the time…and other than that—I don't know, I enjoy singing whenever I get the chance."

"You sing?" Hannah exclaims excitedly. "That's so cool."

Nathan rapidly blinks in the new information and then stares at Amy in awe. "I didn't know that. I wish—" he tries to search for a word to describe his new amazement and new longing to hear her sing.

Hannah continues. "Is your singing more of a private thing? Or do you ever sing in front of people?"

"Well, I'm not going to sing in front of you now," Amy's eyes widen and tilts her head playfully. "But, yeah, I sing in front of people, sometimes at weddings and a couple of local spots, mostly with my grandpa."

"Really?" Nathan manages to ask.

Amy turns to him. For the first time, she sees the amazement in his eyes. "Not very often. It's not a big deal."

"That's so cool, though," Hannah says.

"Thanks."

"So, you're a part of your big family ranch, you have a cool daughter, you sing, and you've been training horses since you were a teenager," Josh summarizes. "Would you say we've got a pretty good idea now of who Nathan is dating?"

Amy shrugs. "Sure. Pretty good…But I wouldn't really call what I do horse training. I—uh—I work with horses who have behavior problems and try to get the root of their issues."

Hannah sits up straighter and looks at Amy with new eyes. "Oh, my, god. You're Amy Fleming. You're the Miracle Girl."

For Amy, who has experienced similar responses to Hannah's over the years, navigating the moment comes naturally. She neither confirms or denies the title, but rather offers a reserved smile instead. After a moment, she tucks her chin, letting the smile fade quietly.

"Nathan!" Hannah playfully hits his shoulder. "You didn't tell us you were dating the famous Miracle Girl!"

For Nathan, Amy's Miracle Girl status still feels new to him. To see her reference as that in a third-party promotional material was one thing; to hear people refer to her as that in person—especially his friends—was another. The mixed feelings of pride, awe, and reverence at her talent and skill juxtapose everything about her that he fell in love with: her kindness and empathy, her humbleness and respect for all creatures, and her strength and integrity. "It's just not how I would describe her," he shares honestly.

Amy's heart swells at Nathan's response. Under the table, she reaches out to give his hand a simple squeeze.

Josh watches Hannah's excitement and notices the contrast to both Amy's and Nathan's hesitant reserve. In an attempt to bridge the gap, he chimes in, "I think we saw one of your clinics once. I was visiting some family up in the foothills and my nieces were dying to see you."

Amy can't do much with the vague memory. Having no desire to dwell on the subject, she replies simply, "That's sweet."

"Nathan," Josh redirects the table's attention. "Have you been to one of Amy's clinics?"

"Oh, um," Nathan and Amy turn towards each other, feeling the other out. He's unsure of how to respond until he notices the levity in her expression and the playfulness in her eyes. He matches her lightheartedness in his tone, raising his eyebrows and teasing, "I haven't been invited to one yet."

Amy laughs and Nathan smiles at her. Josh and Hannah watch them together, enchanted by their interplay. "I had no idea you wanted to go," she teases.

"Oh," Hannah jumps in before Nathan can respond. "You have to go."

"He's seen me work, Hannah," Amy assures her. "He knows the deal."

"I'm sure it's not the same," Hannah proclaims. "You're great in front of a crowd."

"Sometimes…Definitely not all the time." Amy concedes. Reaching the end of tolerance for the subject, her mind searches for a way to redirect the conversation. "So, Josh," she takes a sip of water. "What do you do?"

[writeonthrough]

Namy Nuggets (9/13)

A fanfic collection of Amy and Nathan scenes from CBC’s Heartland. (Catch up on the series here)

Nugget #9: Miracle Girl

As Nathan rides across the open fields, he watches the sun slowly sink into the sky, thankful for Canada's long summer nights. When he approaches the patch of birch trees between his property line and Amy's, he slows Powder and weaves him through the trees, following the brook, until he reaches its natural end.

He finds Amy there, moving some fallen branches around, waiting for him. His heart skips at the sight.

Amy turns at the sound of horses' hooves. She brushes the hair from her face and smiles. "Hey."

"Hey." He dismounts Powder and leads him to join Shadow, grazing in a patch of grass. Once free of the reins, he reaches for Amy. She walks into his embrace. He strokes her cheeks softly before kissing her hello. She deepens the kiss for a moment before pulling back to look at him. Nathan runs his fingers through her hair and she closes her eyes to enjoy his touch. "Sorry I'm late," he whispers. "Work would not stop today."

"I get it. No worries." She releases him and returns to their usual spot where she's already laid down a blanket and he follows her. "Lyndy took longer than usual to go down anyway."

"Well, we've never met here after dinner," he states, sitting on the blanket. He watches Amy find her spot, sitting between his legs and leaning against his chest, and his arms fold around her. "You think Lyndy could sense that you'd be gone for a bit?"

"No," she pushes back against his shoulder playfully. "I think she's a kid and some nights are harder than others."

"You're a good mom," Nathan says for the first time aloud, though he's thought it every time he sees Amy with Lyndy. "You don't seem like an obsessive worrier."

He feels her shrug against his chest. "I just don't see the point. It seems like it is a waste of energy."

"My mom is an obsessive worrier," he shares.

"Ah…" Amy turns to meet his gaze. "And how was that growing up?"

"Oh, really fun," he replies with sarcasm. "Especially when I was bronc riding."

"Is that why you stopped?"

"No." He grows quiet. "I stopped when my mom took me to Montana after she divorced my dad during grade 10. I just didn't have the same friend group anymore."

Amy takes a moment to digest the information. "That must have been hard."

"Yeah…" Though he's always appreciated Amy's kind and thoughtful responses, tonight is the first time he notes how soft, kind and understanding they are. Her empathy prompts him to continue. "Especially moving in the middle of high school. I was already a shy and sort of withdrawn kid—plotting me down in the middle of strangers expecting me to make friends didn't help."

She nods in agreement. "I'm sure it didn't."

He leans down to kiss her shoulder as thanks for her understanding. Rather than the silence filling the space between them, the sounds of dusk come to life around them: crickets chirp from their hidden spots among the grasses and the birch trees, the brook babbles as the water runs through it, and an owl hoots far off in the distance.

"So, Amy, tell me—" he starts and she turns to face him. Instead of continuing, however, he sees the brightness in her face and can't help but lean down to kiss her. She smiles as she meets his lips, once, twice, before they lose themselves in each other. She turns further into him as he tightens his hold around her. When he does, she falls back on him and he slowly lies down, guiding her on top of him. He deepens the kiss and they move together in unison.

Still gripping each other, they turn on their sides, only to be stopped by Amy's: "Ahh!"

"What?" Nathan quickly releases her. "What happened?"

"I'm fine," Amy pulls a small rock from beneath the blanket. "Stupid rock."

Only when he sees her smile and the rock in her hand does Nathan start laughing. Amy groans and tosses the rock aside. She turns back to him, sees his wide smile, and matches it. They share laughter with each other, caught in the moment. When it passes, Amy leans in to give him a quick kiss.

"You know," she sits up and adjusts her shirt, moving back to the edge of the blanket. "I was collecting firewood before you showed up and it's starting to get dark—so…"

"That's—uh—" Nathan sits up and gets his bearings. "That's a good idea. I'll help you."

"Thanks."

The two work together to start a fire. It does not take them long since both have spent nights in the wilderness constantly throughout their lives. They put the safeguards in place and kindle the fire together, watching the flames grow to a stable point where they can feel the heat on their faces.

Amy returns to the blanket and Nathan takes a place beside her. They watch the fire together, letting the flames dance in front of them.

Amy turns to him, "Did you want to ask me something?" she whispers, careful not to ruin the moment. "Before?"

"Oh…" Nathan nods and reaches out to entwine their fingers. "You seem to have a real gift at this empathy thing—not only with me—but especially around horses. And I was just wondering if that's how you got named the 'miracle girl.'"

She laughs out loud at his question. He watches her face light up again as she sits up straighter and squeezes his hand.

"What?" he asks, bemused. "Why are you laughing at me?"

"We've known each other for—like—a year," she shakes her head with a smile. "And you ask me this now? If people ask me, they mention it like—within the first five minutes of meeting me."

"Well, I'm not most people," he leans in for a quick kiss. "Now am I?"

"No, you most certainly are not." She kisses him again.

When they break apart, he gives her arm a squeeze. "Seriously, what's the story with the name?"

She sighs. "People started calling me that in high school."

"In high school?" He clarifies, shock evident on his face.

"Yeah…" She debates for a moment on whether to tell him the whole story. "Uh…My school bus was involved in a multi-vehicle crash on the highway." She notices the concern on his face and then adds, "No one on the bus got hurt…Anyway, one of the vehicles was a horse trailer and it was tipped over and was wrecked pretty badly. Once I saw the trailer, I started franticly looking for the horses out the bus window. I see a horse—Caesar—trapped in some barbed wire on the side of the road, freaking out. So, against everyone's protests, I get off the bus to calm Caesar down and try and get him free from the wire…I must have been so focused on Caesar that I didn't notice everyone staring at me…and then I found out someone was filming me as I was trying to just get this horse to calm down…on top of that, I also found out Caesar is this big famous Olympic hopeful and soon afterward his famous owner is asking me to work with him. Someone gave me the Miracle Girl name from watching the video of me calming down Caesar and then it just turned into this huge thing that I did not want or ask for...but I wanted to help Caesar and the name kind of just stayed around…So…"

"Wow…that's quite a story."

Amy scoffs. "I don't know about that. I just wanted to you to know—with obviously too many details."

"No," He puts his arm around her and squeezes her shoulder. "I like the details. Thank you for the details."

She rolls her eyes. "Uh-huh."

Nathan goes over the story in his head. "You were working with Olympic hopefuls in high school? That's a lot of pressure for someone so young."

"Yeah," she nods. He watches her eyes grow to saucers and realizes how big a deal his observation is. "It was a lot of pressure—and not just with Caesar. I worked with a couple of really big-name horses in high school…looking back on it—" She takes a deep breath, realizing, "It was actually crazy."

He turns to her and his voice softens, "Was this all after your mom died?"

"Oh, yeah," she confirms. "Yeah, all after mom died…I don't know, it was a good distraction—keeping me busy, doing what I loved, and it made me feel connected to her. So…" she shrugs, "It was nice."

[writeonthrough]

Namy Nuggets (8/13)

A fanfic collection of Amy and Nathan scenes from CBC’s Heartland. (Catch up on the series here)

Nugget #8: Space In Your Heart

"I have decided," Amy announces, plopping herself down on the blanket beside Nathan, "That this is my new favorite place." She smiles and leans in to kiss him. "I love it here—with you."

"Me too." Nathan nods and gives her a half smile, "You know that."

Amy watches his quietness for a moment and her forehead creases. "But…"

He shakes his head and shrugs his shoulders. "But, nothing." He pulls her closer to him. She finds her favorite position and rests against his chest.

She searches for a reason for his quietness. "What did Lou tell you?"

"Not much more than you did."

"Okay, then," Amy sits up and turns to face him. "Then why are you so quiet?"

"I'm a quiet guy. I don't know what to tell you."

"I know when you're quiet." Amy keeps her tone gentle. "I enjoy sitting with you and being with you when you're quiet." She places a supportive hand on his leg. "This isn't you being quiet. I can feel the wheels turning in your head from here. What's going on?"

"You know," Nathan breaks into a smile. "Try not to know me so well, okay?" He teases. "We've been together for over a month…and honestly, it's creeping me out a little."

Amy laughs. She reaches out to place both hands on his cheeks. She pulls him to her to capture his lips. He deepens the kiss, encircling the small of her back and tugging her closer.

She kisses him back, running her fingers through his hair, enjoying their moment together. As their lips explore each other, she engulfs herself in the feeling, trying to commit it to memory. When they part for a moment to switch sides, Amy's eyes open long enough to notice unease hiding in the corners of his face.

"Nathan—" She tears herself from him. He has to place his palm down quickly to catch himself from falling over. "Do you really think you are going to get out of this by distracting me with your breathtaking kisses—"

Nathan raises his eyebrows. "My breathtaking kisses?"

"Nathan!" Amy pushes herself up straighter and scoots back. "I know something is bothering you. Just, please," she tucks her hair back as it dances around her. "Talk to me."

Paralyzed by his innermost thoughts and fears, he stares at her, watching her empathic gaze reach out to him and her hair curl around the curves of her chin and shoulders.

"It's Ty," he finally confesses. "It's you and Ty."

"Me and Ty," she repeats, incredulous. "Okay, seriously? You're interrupting our make-out session because of my dead husband?"

"Technically, you interrupted it, but—" He nervously bites his lips, "But yeah, sorry."

She nods, accepting but annoyed. "Kind of a buzz kill, buddy."

"Yeah," he sighs. "I know."

Her brow furrows as she looks at him. "Haven't we talked about Ty enough?" She pauses for an answer. When it doesn't come, she guesses, "Was it something Lou said?"

"No," he tells her softly and she can see the sincerity behind his eyes. "I don't know…" Nathan looks down and tries to find enough courage for his confession. "I guess I'm just scared."

Amy's heart swells as his words sink in. Compassion seeps from her as she reminds herself of how long it took him to be open and ready for a new relationship with her. Her voice breaks as she whispers, "I know."

"It's not just my previous fears about relationships. It's—" He finally looks at her. "Amy, every day, I'm falling more in love with you—and then I keep hearing about how great your relationship was with Ty—"

"We have been talking about him too much—"

He shakes his head softly. "That wasn't my point."

She blinks. "Okay…"

"I'm scared," he reiterates. "Because I love you. Because I want to know you and I want to be with you. And you were with Ty for almost half your life. That's a long time, Amy. And part of knowing you means knowing what Ty meant to you." Nathan pauses for a moment to emphasize his point. He tries to look for clues in her expression to indicate how she's receiving his grand declaration: her chest rises and falls as if she needs more oxygen. He continues before his courage to be vulnerable runs out. "So, when Caleb and Lou describe you and Ty together—how deeply in love both of you were, how strong you were together—I can't help but want that for us. But, with Ty, I'm afraid that we can't have the same type of space in your heart."

Only when he finishes pouring his heart out does he look at her again. She can't meet his gaze. She focuses on everything around them, except him, before settling on a bluebird in the distance. Her chest has stopped rising and falling and now holds still, permanently expanded like a balloon filled with too much air, stretching itself out far past its own popping point.

He waits for her to speak. Regret and humiliation rise in him when she stays silent. "I'm sorry, Amy. I know that wasn't fair to say."

As Amy watches the bluebird, she exhales, remembering how her mom believed bluebirds brought happiness. She smiles to herself and only when the bluebird flies away does she turn back to him. Her small smile offers him hope.

"It is fair," she finally says breathlessly. "There's nothing wrong with wanting a strong and loving relationship. I want that for us too."

The quick shift in mood, from regret to joy, happens too fast for Nathan to fully process. He looks at her from the corner of his eyes with happy disbelief on his face. "Really?"

She shrugs, relaxing him further. "I mean, we're not going to have the same type of relationship that Ty and I had, and I don't want the same type of relationship. That was a once-in-a-lifetime kind of relationship," she explains and his faces falls. She notices his discouragement and adds, "Honestly I'd rather avoid some of really high highs and the really low lows that Ty and I had to go through to have the type of relationship we did…But Nathan," she reaches for hand and entwines their fingers. "I have as much space in my heart for you as we're able to create." She takes a deep breath. "The depth and strength of a relationship just builds with time." Amy pauses to look at him with empathy, "You know that."

"Well, I told you—I'm in this. I'm not going anywhere."

"Hmm," Amy leans in for a kiss. "That's one of the things I love about you."

"The fact that I like being at home alone, on my ranch?" He raises his eyebrows and then takes a risk by adding: "Caleb said Ty was restless, always off on adventures." He takes a beat. "Is that true?"

It throws Amy off for a moment to hear Caleb's descriptions of Ty through Nathan. "Uh," she scratches the back of her neck. "Not always, but he could be."

"Haven't you described yourself as a homebody?"

"Come on," She tilts her head at him, asking for a little credit. "I can love that he loved exploring the world and I can love that you love staying home. Ty spent his time the way he wanted to spend it and I want you to love how you spend your time. Just because I love spending my time the way that you do, doesn't mean that I wanted Ty to spend his time any differently than he did—it could be hard, sometimes, but that's part of who he was."

Nathan nods in the information. "Okay."

"Nathan, honestly," She starts seriously. "I don't think this comparison thing is healthy. You don't have to worry about Ty—"

"But I do, Amy." He meets her seriousness with his own. "He matters to you and he matters to Lyndy and he matters to your friends and family. I want to be able to hold my own and have some reference points when the topic comes up."

"Fair enough," she agrees halfway. "But that doesn't mean you should compare the two of you or our two relationships. I don't think that's fair to anyone."

"Yeah, but," he looks at her. "Don't you?"

"Only when you ask about it," she retorts sharply.

Nathan bites his lip at her curt reply. For a moment, he doesn't know what to say or do. They sit in an awkward silence before his curiosity forces him to speak. "Okay. I have one more question," he confesses and her head falls in defeat. "It's the last one I've been wanting to ask you and then I'll really stop, I promise."

Amy narrows her eyes at him, playfully doubting him. "Really? One question?"

He nods and then takes a deep breath. "Do you ever wonder what Ty would think of me…of us?" He lets the question sit between them before continuing, "I mean…Caleb says one thing, Lou says another. I hear opinions from them, but you haven't really voiced anything regarding me and Ty." He pauses to give her a chance to speak. When she chooses not to take it, he continues. "I keep telling myself our relationship is our relationship and I know it is. But I just wonder how you think about it."

She meets his gaze. He holds steady while she searches him, wondering what to do, what to say. When she notices the sincerity in his eyes, she takes a deep breath and starts. "Ty and I never talked about it."

Slightly confused, Nathan's forehead creases. "About what?"

"What would we want to happen if either of us weren't here anymore. We talked about godparents for Lyndy in case both of us died—not one of us."

Nathan nods, not knowing what to say, hoping that she'll continue without him having to push her or say something he'd regret.

Amy takes her time before speaking. "It's not like he was sick—had some cancer or some other illness. Then, maybe we would have had a moment to talk about what he wanted me to tell Lyndy or if he wanted me to find someone or not. But it wasn't like that. He was here, talking to me one minute, and the next—he was on the ground, unresponsive."

Nathan digests the information quietly. He has trouble trying to imagine the scene she describes.

She continues quietly, "I sometimes wonder what conversations we would have had, what we would have said, what we would have done if we knew he was gonna go…I have my own guesses." She sighs and shakes her head. "But I'm not sure if they actually matter at all."

"What do you mean?"

"I don't know…" She reminds herself of his original question. "He would have liked you as a neighbor. He liked people that treated animals well. Though he would done anything to be loyal to Grandpa with the cattle business. As for us together…I know there's part of him that would hate the idea of any other guy in my life. Part of him always felt like that, even when we weren't together. He could be jealous and overly protective but he matured with time."

"Okay…" Nathan notes that her description aligns with Caleb's words about Ty.

"I also know there was another part of him, the best part of him, would have been so grateful to you. All he wanted was for me to be happy. And you make me happy, Nathan. So, Ty really would be happy that I found someone who I can love, who loves me and treats Lyndy so well. You are probably better than he could have ever imagined—because you're better than I ever imagined, Nathan."

"Amy…"

"But what you need to understand is—we'll never actually know. So, I don't want to make you or I crazy by wondering too much about it." She pauses for emphasis. "Ty doesn't get a say in our relationship. And I can't control other people's opinions. They're going to say what they're going to say. That doesn't mean that they know what they're talking about. The only people that matter in our relationship are you and me. Okay?"

"Okay." He agrees, blown away by her maturity and thoughtfulness. "You and me."

"You and me," she repeats with confidence. Then she softens, "Does that help quiet the busy wheels turning in your head?"

"It does, actually," he smiles. "Thanks."

"So…can we enjoy the time we have together and try not to make ourselves crazy worrying about people that aren't here and unanswerable questions?"

"I would like that."

"Good…because," she reaches for him and slides herself closer. "I know many other ways that we can make ourselves crazy."

He follows her lead, wrapping his arms around her. "Oh, really?" he teases with a kiss. He guides her down to the blanket, never breaking their kiss. He adjusts himself above her and then tightens his hold around her.

All thoughts and worries disappear as they lose themselves in the moment, in each other. They enjoy the rest of their time together before Amy has to pick up Lyndy at a friend's house and Nathan has to finish his farm work for the day. Even apart, though, they both feel that the day's conversation and moments together allowed them to break through and take a significant step forward in their relationship.

[writeonthrough]

Namy Nuggets (7/13)

A fanfic collection of Amy and Nathan scenes from CBC’s Heartland. (Catch up on the series here)

Nugget #7: Caught!

"He's a working cowhorse," Nathan teases Amy, reaching for her as she closes the stall door. "I happen to know what I'm talking about."

"Oh," Amy turns around and feels his arms sliding around her. She runs her arms up his own and around his neck. "You know what you're talking about? Trying to tell me how to do my job, cowboy?"

"No," Nathan closes the distance between them with a kiss. "Never. I just," he shrugs and nods from side to side playfully. "Remember how much my advice helped you out the last time I offered it to you concerning working cow horses."

She laughs and raises her eyebrows, "Is that so?" She kisses him again and strokes his cheek. "Still trying to change my luck, huh?"

Nathan hides his smile against her cheek before kissing it. "Something like that," he teases, capturing her lips with his once more.

His arms round the small of her back and he lifts her up as the kiss deepens. She holds on tighter as Nathan spins her around. Once her feet settle on new ground, they sway together, both hoping the kiss will linger.

"Amy, have you seen—" Lou steps into the barn to find a couple embracing. "Oh, my, god—" She watches Nathan and Amy break apart. He swiftly takes a clear step back from her. Lou's gaze darts between them, processing the idea of them together. "Wow."

"Uh—" Nathan starts.

"Look, Lou—" Amy takes a step towards her.

"Wow," she repeats. "At least I wasn't Dad or Grandpa. Do they—"

"No," Amy quickly offers. "Can you not—"

Lou shakes her head, dismissingly. Still in disbelief, she processes out loud: "Is this what you were trying to tell me last night?"

Amy's lips part to speak, but all that comes is, "Um—"

"It's okay." Lou puts her hand out to excuse Amy from talking. "We can talk tonight. Nathan," she faces him. "We really have to go, we're gonna be late."

"Yeah," he nods, "Right behind you."

As Lou walks to the truck, Nathan turns back to Amy with an apprehensive expression, she mirrors his expression before a hint of a smile tugs at her lips and a here-we-go attitude comes through in her body language.

He nods and matches her side smile. They hold each other's gazes for one more moment before he tears himself away to meet Lou.

Silence fills the car ride out the Heartland gate and onto the main road. Nathan tries to focus on driving, but surprise nerves flutter in his stomach. When he can tear his attention from the road, he looks over at Lou staring straight ahead, trying to gauge her blank expression.

"Okay, Lou," he breaks the silence. "Come on. You got to say something."

Lou laughs uncomfortably and raises her arms in an I-don't-know expression. "What? I don't know. I'm surprised. I had no hint from Amy that this was going on, so I just don't want to put my foot in my mouth or say something out of bounds." When Nathan does not respond right of way, Lou adds, "Believe me, holding my tongue is growth for me."

Nathan lets out a small chuckle. "Okay." Lou's small joke allows relief to settle back in his body for the first time since she found him with Amy in the barn.

"I'm happy for Amy…if you know, she's happy. I need to talk to her. But I'd be really happy for you guys if she was happy—and you too. I know you're a good guy, Nathan."

"Thanks." A smile tugs at Nathan's lips. "I want her to be happy too."

Lou nods. "Good."

He looks at her, still hesitant in the seat beside him. "But you have questions."

She turns him with a warning look. "I wouldn't be me if my mind didn't fill up with questions when I see my sister with a guy in the barn…but I can talk to Amy later, I don't have to ask you."

"Ask me," Nathan shrugs. "It's okay."

A new-found respect for him floods over her. "Okay." She adjusts herself in her seat with growing anticipation. "I know you guys have been friends…but how long has this—" she interlaces her fingers together. "Thing been going on?"

"Uh…" He can't help smiling at her interlaced fingers. "Not long. Less than a month."

"Okay…" Lou tries to recall any recent changes she's noticed in Amy. When nothing stands out, she remembers how long Amy can take when making decisions. "But you've probably talked about it for longer."

Nathan hides his smirk by looking over his shoulder to enter the main road. "Probably."

Lou chuckles and shakes her head, "Of course."

"What does that mean?"

"I just know Amy can take her time making decisions."

Nathan bites his lip, now unsure of how much to share. "It wasn't that. It was a lot of things."

"Oh. Okay." Lou's voice raises in surprise. Silence returns to the truck for several moments as Nathan continues to drive down the highway. "You know my dad and Grandpa are going to have a problem with this?"

"Yup." He keeps his reply short, having no desire to discuss potential issues with Tim and Jack at the moment. "I know."

"They can be pretty brutal, and not just because you're—well—" she motions to him and then to the 'Pryce Family Beef' sign in his truck. "You. They're unjustly hard on—" she catches herself, not sure how to describe Peter and Ty to Nathan. "The guys in our lives."

Nathan was expecting—almost waiting for Lou to mention Ty. He thought it would come sooner. He turns towards her and catches her eye. "You mean Peter and Ty."

"Not just Peter and Ty. But, yeah…" For the second time, Lou examines him with a mixture of surprise, impressment, and respect. "Did you and Amy talk about Ty?"

Nathan takes a deep breath. "A little."

Lou nods. "Okay."

Nathan bites his lip when Lou keeps her response short, unsure of how much he wants to talk about him. Fighting against his instinct to keep quiet, he asks, "Is there anything you want to tell me or that I should know?"

"Those are two different questions. I'm not one to talk about him. He, uh, he's hard to describe to someone who didn't know him. He was a really good guy who had more than his share of demons. But, man, he was so in love with her. Even being married myself, I was jealous of what they had." She looks over to see deep emotion in Nathan's face hiding under his blank expression. "I said too much. See, I told you—I put my foot in my mouth."

"It's okay, Lou. You didn't say too much."

"It's just…He was really like a brother to me and they were together a long time. He died suddenly out-of-blue, so it was a real shock."

"I'm sorry," is all he can say.

Lou waves off his apology. "It's really okay, Nathan."

They let Lou's words hang comfortably between them. Lou relaxes against the truck door, watching the Alberta hills pass by them.

Nathan tries to quiet his mind like it seems Lou has done beside him. One question keeps circling in his mind, though, and he knows he'll never have another chance to ask it. "Can I ask you something?"

Lou perks up and turns to him, curious. "Sure."

"You said you were surprised to see me with Amy. Was it because of me or was it a surprise to see her with someone else?"

"Oh, definitely you. Even knowing you guys were friendly, I did not see the two of you…well—I thought I had a radar for that kind of thing."

"It's not hard to see her move on?"

"No. I want her to move on. And just talking to you now—it's clear you care about her and you're respectful about Ty. So, you don't have to worry about me. I'm just sorry Dad and Grandpa already see you as a threat—and not the good-natured, quiet guy I know you to be."

Nathan nods as he pulls into a parking space. "Any advice?"

"Uh…" Lou raises her eyebrows and motions with her head out the window towards where they're meeting Jack and Tim. "Really know that it isn't you—no matter what they say about the business. They think they're protecting Amy." She reaches for the door handle but then turns back to catch his eye. "Don't let them scare you off."

[writeonthrough]

Namy Nuggets (6/13)

A fanfic collection of Amy and Nathan scenes from CBC’s Heartland. (Catch up on the series here)

Nugget #6: A Sweet Send-off

Lou raises her glass with Jack and Nathan around the Heartland kitchen table. "Here's to a successful cattle drive," she says and they all clink their glasses together.

"To a successful cattle drive without Tim," Jack sips his wine. "Thanks for stepping up, Lou."

Lou takes the compliment with a smile and turns to Nathan, "And thanks for joining us, Nathan."

"Happy to help," Nathan replies. He raises his glass to his lips, but when he hears heals clicking on the wood floor, he reconsiders. When Amy enters the kitchen, dressed up in a beautiful green dress with her hair rolled neatly in a tight bun, he manages to lower his glass to the table, unaware of his jaw dropping at the sight of her.

"Oh, honey," Jack says with adoration. "You look beautiful."

"Thanks, Grandpa." Amy adjusts her purse strap and looks back at Lyndy's room and then at Lou. "Okay, Lou, Lyndy went down pretty easily so hopefully she won't wake up."

"I'm on it.  Don't worry about it, Amy." Lou examines her up and down as only a big sister would. "Will Clint be there?"

"He said he would be."

"Good...You have your speech? "

"Yes—” Amy checks her purse. "Yup. Got it."

"Speech?" Nathan speaks up.

"It's just for a local fundraiser." Amy shakes her head slightly, trying to brush off its importance. "It's nothing."

"Honey, it's not nothing." Jack reminds her. "It's for Ty's Center--"

"Logan and Mandy are outside waiting for me," she speaks over Jack, hoping Nathan misses the mention of Ty. "I have to go."

"Good luck," Lou calls as Amy rushes out the door.  "Have fun!"

Nathan watches Amy walk to Logan's car and tries to think quickly of an excuse to follow her. When it comes to him, words blur together as he gives an excuse to leave. "You know I forgot to tell Logan something the other day when he was here, I'll be right back."

He runs out to meet Amy.  He catches her on the side of the car hidden from the Heartland kitchen window. "Amy," he reaches out for her elbow and tugs her gently to face him. “Hey. You look really beautiful."

Amy adjusts her purse strap again before looking up at him. "Thank you."

Nathan tries his luck for more information. "Where exactly are you guys going?"

Amy searches his gaze only to find genuine curiosity. She sighs, "It's a fundraiser for a Foster Youth Equine Center I support."

Nathan raises a hand to her shoulder, his thumb stroking its rounded corner. "It's for Ty's Center."

Amy freezes. "Yeah."

Instead of accusations, she finds compassion on his face. "You could have told me that."

"Yeah," she agrees and looks down, hoping to avoid a longer conversation.

Nathan brings a finger to her chin to raise her face up to him. When he has her attention, he says softly. "I would have liked to come."

Amy's face brightens, her eyes shine in the moonlight. "Really?"

"Of course," he promises.  "I told you--I really want to know you. Besides, your family isn't coming and I mean...look at you." He motions to her hair and her dress. "It would have been the perfect opportunity to see you shine and meet some of your friends--"

Amy cuts him off with a kiss, surprising him. In heels, she doesn't have to reach up to him. She enjoys the equal footing, tilting her head slightly for a more meaningful moment before pulling away. As they part, their eyes met. "Thank you," she says with sincerity. "For being so kind."

His hand runs down her arm to squeeze her hand. "I mean it, you know."

She nods. "We have these fundraisers three or four times a year." She squeezes his hand back. "Next time, okay?"

Amy surprises him by leaning in for a kiss. He meets her gently as a thanks and a send-off.   

[writeonthrough]

Namy Nuggets (5/13)

A fanfic collection of Amy and Nathan scenes from CBC’s Heartland. (Catch up on the series here)

Nugget #5: Birch Tree Meeting #2: Questions

A slight wind blows through the birch tree cluster as Amy stands in the middle of it. The breeze picks up her hair, sweeping it forward before moving on to send ripples down the small stream. She watches the ripples spread out, wondering how long she’s been here, waiting for Nathan, and how long she should stay. Her fingers tap together once, twice, before she turns around, ready to ride Shadow home.

To her surprise, Nathan appears in front of her. She retreats slightly, taking in his appearance. His cowboy hat is still on and his hands rest on his hips.

“Going somewhere?” His brow raises in question.

“No,” she shakes her head slowly. “Wasn’t planning on it.”

“Ah, okay.” He gestures to Shadow. “Your beeline to Shadow wasn’t a decision to leave then?”

Amy parts her lips to form a response, then decides to change the subject. “How long have you been standing there?”

“Long enough to have my own doubts on whether to stay.”

“Okay,” Amy puts her hands in her back pockets. Another gust of wind blows through Amy’s hair and Nathan watches it dance around her. “So…do you want to go?”

“Wasn’t planning on it,” he nods in the direction where they usually sit, inviting her to join him.

Instead spreading a blanket this time, Nathan finds a birch tree to lean against while Amy settles on a large, flat rock opposite him.

She waits for him to say something. She searches for emotional clues, but can’t find much aside from a peaceful face.

Unable to stand the silence much longer, Amy interjects into it, “I know there were probably a lot of surprises over the weekend,” she starts. When he meets her gaze but still says nothing, she continues, “Do you want to talk about them?”

Nathan leans forward, searching her as well, trying to figure her out. “Do you?”

“I—I,” his considerate question catches her off guard. “Honestly, I never know how much to say. I don’t want feel like I’m keeping things from you. I don’t like talking about the past…I actually think we’re alike in that way,” she pauses and they share a meaningful look. “At the same time, I don’t want to start talking, share too much, and scare you off.”

Nathan tilts his head and reassures her. “You’re not going to scare me off.”

“I might…inadvertently,” she raises her shoulders, unsure. “I don’t know.”

Nathan reaches for her, “I want you to feel like you can talk to me.” She takes his hand and he tugs her closer. “Ty was an important part of your life for a long time…longer than I realized,” He finds a lighter tone, “And apparently Caleb was too, so—”

Amy laughs and he’s glad she caught his levity. “Caleb was just always there, tagging along, he sort of became part of our clan by accident.”

“You and Ty made him Lyndy’s godfather,” Nathan points out as Amy moves around him to find a spot next to him against the birch tree. Their shoulders touch as he leans into her. “He was clearly important to both of you.”

Nathan waits for a reply, but Amy simply nods and says nothing. She picks up a long piece of grass and twirls it between her fingers.

He tries again, “Caleb said—”

Amy turns back quickly, “Caleb says a lot of things. I swear he has not learned to think before he talks, or acts, or makes decisions.”

“Ha,” Nathan lets out a laugh. “He said the same thing to me the other night.”

His words give her pause. She narrows her gaze at him. “You guys talked when he was here?”

“For a few minutes,” he shrugs, then notices the concern on her face. “He didn’t say anything bad.”

“Right…” she leans back against the tree in defeat.

He turns to face her. He reaches out to rest a supportive hand on her shoulder, but moves to her knee instead. “He said you and Ty were together for seven years before you got engaged.”

Amy pulls back, surprised. Her forehead creases. “We knew each other for that long before we got engaged. I wouldn’t say we were together that long.”

“Really?” He recalls Caleb’s words: even when they weren’t together, they were still together, and works to keep them to himself. “What would you say?”

He watches emotions play across her face: annoyance, frustration, confusion before she tears herself away from the intensity of his gaze. She focuses on the stream beside them, letting that focus calm her emotions.

“Amy?”

She turns back to him. “This is the part where I don’t know how much to say. I don’t know what you’re actually asking. Do you want to hear the brief history or the long history or just how many years I would say that we were together—which I don’t even know if there’s a correct answer to that, Ty might have said a different number…”

“Okay…You’re right,” Nathan raises a hand to her shoulder and strokes it twice before releasing it. “It’s not about the number.” He sighs, frustrated that he is not expressing himself the way he would like. He takes a deep breath and tries again. “You’re important to me, Amy, and I care about you. I guess I’m just trying to get a sense of who the most important person in life was for so long…So you’re not gonna scare me off or say too much. I just—” he stops, waiting to catch her eye. “Ty is a part of you…and I really want to know you.”

Amy sighs. She picks up another piece of grass, twiddles it, and then returns to him. He waits for her to speak with an understanding look on his face.

She takes a deep breath. “My mom died in a car crash when I was fifteen. I was with her in the car,” she starts in a matter-of-fact manner and he’s taken aback, not expecting the direction she took. “She died saving Spartan from an abusive owner.” Nathan tries to voice words of sympathy, but she doesn’t pause her story. “Mom was a big believer in giving people second chances. She sometimes hired stable hands that were lost in life, in foster care, or on probation. A couple days after I was released from the hospital, Ty showed up—her newest stable hand hire on probation. He was there as I tried to move on from losing her and took up her job of working with horses and their problems on the ranch. Ty was always there to help me. Over time, he grew up too, and eventually he graduated vet school.”

She pauses for the first time, but now, Nathan doesn’t know what to say. When she doesn’t either, she reminds herself of his original question. “Because I was a confused, mourning teenager when we met and he was battling his own past, it’s kind of hard to say how long we were together—there were a lot of starts and stops…But I guess one way of looking at it would be he was the most important person in my life for thirteen years and we were married for five of them.”

Nathan remains quiet as he takes in her story. He looks at her with awe as she shrugs the story off with a hint of a smile.

When he finally speaks, all he can say is, “You’re incredible, Amy.”

She shakes her head, “That really wasn’t the point of me telling you all that.”

“To have a positive outlook on life, to finishing telling me that and have a smile on your face, after everything you’ve been through…I could never do that.”

Amy sighs, “It happened a long time ago.”

“Still,” he says seriously, “You’ve been through more than I could ever handle.”

“Nathan,” she reaches out to him. “I don’t think it works like that.”

“No, seriously, Tristin cheats on me, and I shield myself off from the world. The world takes and takes from you and you still here with open arms and a smile.”

“It doesn’t take everything from me. It keeps giving me things too.” She turns to him and watches him focus on the nature around them. A bluebird flies from one tree branch to another.  “You’re here, with me, making me happy…giving me a chance to start falling in love again.”

“Me too,” Nathan whispers. He smiles to himself and Amy misses it. She nudges his shoulder with her own, prompting him to turn back to her. She waits for him to say something more. He doesn’t. Instead, he leans in to kiss her.

“So,” she raises a palm to his cheek. Her thumb slowly strokes his face. He closes his eyes at her touch. “The world gives you things too.”

Nathan nods quietly, but says nothing. With his eyes still closed, Amy can freely watch the emotions travel through his face. She raises a second hand into his hair and he leans in closer. Up close, it feels like she can see his pain and sadness consume him and then wash over him. New curiosities bubble up in her as she watches his process.

With Nathan curled up beside her, Amy doesn’t know what to do. She breathes with him, in, then out, and then looks away, trying to decide. Once she does, she nods to herself and then sits up straighter.

She leans in, places a long kiss on his forehead, and then releases him. “Nathan,” she whispers. It takes him a moment find her again. When their eyes meet, she somehow knows he won’t be surprised by her request. “Tell me about Tristin.”

He continues to look at her. He takes another deep breath in, out, and Amy watches his chest expand and contract. “I wouldn’t even know where to start.”

“It doesn’t matter where you start,” she tells him gently, her voice full of compassion. “I’ve told you about Ty. I don’t know anything about Tristin.”

“Tristin isn’t to me what Ty is to you.” He shakes his head. “Ty is still an important part of who you are.”

Amy frowns with sympathy. Once again, she brings a palm to his cheek. “And Tristin isn’t a part of you?”

“Not anymore.” Nathan quietly shakes his head. “I don’t want her to be.”

“I know,” she strokes his cheek. “But she is. And,” She waits until he looks at her. “I love who you are.”

“Okay,” he finds inner strength and comes up with a forward direction. He sits up straighter and adjusts himself. Amy does the same, pushing herself up with both hands against the ground. “We met in college, in one of my business classes. We were paired up on a class project to design an ad for some cleaning supplies and we approached it in two totally different ways. She was flying off the wall with a million ideas and I just sat quietly, trying to find two ideas that would connect together.”

He notices Amy’s lips upturn at the story and he pauses for a moment, encouraged. “Um, I don’t know, her whole life was kind of chaotic like that. She always had a dozen things going on at once—countless different social groups, a handful of committees, a dozen different goals she wanted to accomplish. I thought it would calm down once we graduated. It didn’t. She just found new things to do. She’d step foot in a new city and have ten new friends within a week.”

“Huh,” Amy processes the information and tries not to make any assumptions. She reflects what she hears. “A real-life energizer-bunny, huh?”

“Yeah,” Nathan nods. “I guess the opposites attract thing is obvious now. I didn’t see then. I just kind of went along for the ride.”

Amy continues to watch her words. “It’s hard to see anything when you’re in the middle of it.”

“I’m not sure about that,” Nathan scoffs. “I think part of me knew it was too much for me.”

“Hey, come on,” Amy reaches out to him. “Cut yourself some slack. Isn’t college a place for people try on different sides of themselves?”

“I guess.” He shrugs. They sit comfortably together as he regroups. “I hated college. Tristin aside, I’m glad I went. It helps me now with the business side of the ranch, but I actually hated it. If it wasn’t for Tristin and our relationship, I don’t think I would have graduated.”

“Well, that’s a good thing, right?”

“I don’t know.” He pauses, remembering what she had said about her relationship with Ty and doing it all again if she could. “I wouldn’t ever do it again, even if I still use my degree.”

Amy nods, digesting his point of view. “I know. But now, after all that, you know who you are and what you want—the quiet ranch life suits you—your land, your cows, and Molly.”  

“And you, Miss Sunshine,” Nathan teases. “How did you enjoy college?”

“Oh,” Amy takes a moment as her mind jolts out of thinking about Nathan and Tristin to thinking about her own life decisions. “I didn’t go to college.”

Nathan turns his whole body towards her and looks at her for the first time since talking about Tristin. He smiles with a mixture of surprise and amusement. “Really?”

“Yeah,” Amy sighs. “I was actually offered a full ride to Colorado State University in their Equine Science program.”

“Wow,” He looks at her with fresh eyes. “Amy, that’s a big deal. That’s a great program.”

She nods. “Thanks.”

He searches her, growing contemplative. “Why didn’t you go?”

“Lots of reasons…”

“Okay…” Nathan juts his chin out. “Like what?”

“Like, I don’t know,” Amy sighs once more. “I guess emotionally, my mom had died three years before. My dad had re-entered my life after disappearing for ten years. Ty and I were in a good place. I just didn’t really want to leave home…But more importantly and practically, I really wanted to devote myself to working with horses full time and really see what I could do. I didn’t have the time in high school and I really couldn’t do it if I went away to college. So, my desire to focus on my work is really what made the decision easy.”

“You knew what you wanted,” he observes. “And you trusted yourself when making a big decision—even when you were young.”

Amy takes a deep breath and pulls him closer. He scoots around her and she takes his arms and wraps them around her. He gives her a squeeze as she sinks into his embrace.

“I’ve learned that when people trust themselves and follow their hearts,” she strokes his arms. “They almost always end up in the right place.”

[writeonthrough]

Namy Nuggets (4/13)

A fanfic collection of Amy and Nathan scenes from CBC’s Heartland. (Catch up on the series here)

Nugget #4: Cattle Drive Break

"Here," Caleb's voice makes Nathan turn around to see Caleb offering him a water bottle. "Hopefully it's still a little cold."

Nathan uncrosses his arms and stands from leaning against a tree to take the drink. "Thanks, man."

Caleb nods and looks out at the open field before him, bordered by trees on all sides. He's been here, doing these exact cattle drives for more than 15 years, yet every time it looks a little different.

"So," Nathan breaks the silence. "Has Tim always been a hard ass?"

"Ha," Caleb scoffs. "This is the new," he raises his eyebrows and his drink, "Relaxed version of Tim."

"You're kidding."

"I wish. He was much worse before he got married to Jessica."

Nathan takes a swig of water. "How long have they been married?"

"Uh," Caleb thinks back to their wedding at the dude ranch. "Three years."

The two men stand in silence, looking out to the field. Serval minutes pass before Caleb notices movement several meters away from them. The white horse prances from the trees and he squints to see it more clearly.

"Ah!" He exclaims, "No way!"

Nathan looks around, trying to catch what Caleb sees.  When he doesn't, he looks to Caleb who already is calling out behind him.

"Miracle Girl!" He calls out to her. "Get over here!"

As Amy makes her way to them, Nathan questions, "Caleb, what is going on?"

Caleb ignores him and focuses on Amy coming closer.

As she approaches, her apprehension is clear. She sighs, "What trouble are you getting into, Odell?"

He smiles, "Your gentleman caller is here."

Amy narrows her brow. "My what?"

Caleb nods towards the trees. "Ghost is here."

Nathan watches Amy's face fall, but at the same time--her eyes brighten. "What?" She steps forward for a close look. She whispers, "Caleb..."

"Go talk to him," he puts forward pressure on her shoulder.  "You know he's here for you." Caleb can't contain his excitement, which only confuses Nathan more.

Nathan tries to catch her attention, but fails as she stares at the wild horse. "You know that wild horse, Amy?" He asks, surprised.

"Yeah," she says simply.

"Go," Caleb nudges her again. "Go."

"Caleb," she looks back at him. "What if he's hurt?"

"He's not. I know it."

"No, you don't." Amy asserts. "Caleb. I won't be able to handle it if he is. Every time he shows up--"

"Everything will be fine, Amy." Caleb promises. "You know you need to go see him."

"Okay." A smile finally appears on her face. Caleb beams, standing taller with pride and anticipation as Amy walks down the slight hill to meet the horse.

"What is she doing?" Nathan asks with more curiosity than concern. "You know that could be really dangerous."

"That horse would never hurt her," he tells Nathan. "They have some sort of spiritual connection."

"A spiritual connection?" Nathan pivots towards him. "With a wild horse?"

"Oh, yeah," Caleb confirms. "That horse has come to Amy in some of the happiest and saddest moments in her life. It's spectacular to watch." He looks at him and then nods towards Ghost. "You're in for a treat."

They both watch as Amy approaches Ghost. The appaloosa horse turns to her as she nears, allowing her to touch him briefly.  When she walks a little ahead of him, he follows her willingly.

"You've seen her do this before?" Nathan asks, incredulously.

"Many, many times." Caleb delights. "She isn't called the Miracle Girl for nothing, you know."

Nathan nods. "You've called her that a couple times now."

"A lot of people call her that, mostly clients and a couple newspaper headlines," Nathan raises an eyebrow. "And she hates it, as to be expected, modest woman as she is...But she tolerates from a few people--me and Ty and her family--just because we are half-serious and half-teasing her. And," Caleb shrugs, nodding towards Amy, "We were all there when she got the name."

Still watching Amy and Ghost, Nathan shares, "I've never seen her do anything like that."

"Then maybe you haven't scratched the surface of how amazing she is," Caleb shares his observation as if it was an important fact.

Caleb's bold claim hangs in the air between them. It takes a minute, but when Nathan turns back to him, Caleb can see big emotions swirling in his eyes: admiration, amazement, love, and true fear at the prospect at being with her.  Despite calling him out moments ago, Caleb now sees the depth of Nathan's feelings for Amy. For the first time since Amy told him they were secretly together, he realizes the seriousness of their relationship--at least on Nathan's side.

Now wishing for a beer instead of the plain water he was drinking, Caleb looks down as his own heartbreak hits him: even playing the supportive friend wasn't going to help him out of the friend zone. Whatever small chance he thought had left, he felt it vanishing as his gaze darted between Amy and Ghost and Nathan, still watching them.

Somehow, he swallows his emotions and forces himself that Ty would want the best for Amy, he always did.  "Ty told me once: I had no idea what Amy can do."

Nathan turns back at the name. "Ty?"

"Hmm," Caleb takes a final sip and then puts his drink down. "I had only worked at Heartland for a couple months at that point and Ty had returned from his latest soul searching journey and...I don't know--I must have said some stupid comment to piss him off because, back then it was so easy to get him worked up--which, honestly--just tempted me to do it more--But he retorts by telling me that I didn't have a clue about how amazing her gift with horse was, and—” Caleb gestures to Amy and Ghost who seem to be dancing in the field together. "He was right."

Nathan takes a deep breath and crosses his arms. As he tries to digest the information--how much it scares him, how much he craves for Amy to tell him more, to show him more, for him to know all there is to know about her, yet to still keep their new relationship new, and quiet, and slow--he realizes Caleb must see the emotions play across his face.

He jolts up straighter from his position and tries to wipe the emotions that he can off his face.

Caleb watches his self-consciousness and kindly offers remedy: "I don't mean to keep talking about Ty. I won't do it anymore if you don't want...I just, I don't know," he shrugs. "Maybe I wanted to pass on Ty's words to me about Amy...to you...if that's okay."

"Amy doesn't talk about him much," Nathan shares.

"She does. She will," Caleb assures him.  "If you ask. If you want to know...She'll tell you. She doesn't like to ruminate about the past like I do. And she probably just doesn't want to scare you off."

Nathan narrows his eyebrows, questioning: "To scare me off?"

Caleb turns more serious. "She was so in love with him. They were a strong unit together."

Nathan shifts uncomfortably. The words pierce his heart deeper than he would have expected. Then again, remembering Tristin, he also knew what it was to love and commit to someone so deeply.

"It took a lot for her to get here, Nathan," Caleb shares another personal insight about Amy. "To start opening her heart again. She was closed off and not herself for a long time. She's been through enough in her life." He pauses, hoping the vagueness still makes his point without going into specifics. "When she returned back into her old self again, I tried to encourage her to start dating, just to find some levity and fun again: she would not budge...Now that she's found something real with you, I would bet that she's just as scared to lose it as you are."

[writeonthrough]

Namy Nuggets (3/13)

A fanfic collection of Amy and Nathan scenes from CBC’s Heartland. (Catch up on the series here)

Nugget 3: Caleb and Nathan Talk

"Thanks for dinner, Lou!" Caleb calls out from the porch, holding the screen door open for Nathan and Amy.

"Thanks again," Nathan waves to Lou. "See you tomorrow."

Lou mirrors his simple gesture. "Bye, boys."

Once in the summer night air, Nathan takes a reflective deep breath, hoping to let go of the day's tension. He snaps back to the moment as Amy walks beside him, looping her arm through his.

He does a double take in surprise, looks at Caleb cautiously ahead of them, and then leans in closer. "Hey."

"Hey," Amy squeezes his arm. "I'm sorry about today. I should have told you where I was going and why—"

"You did. You told me you were doing a clinic."

Amy leans on his shoulder and looks up at him. He meets her gaze. "I didn't want to overcomplicate things. I didn't know how much to say."

Nathan stops walking and turns to face her. "You know you could have, right? If you wanted to."

"Yeah," she looks at him in awe. "I know. I would have—"

"Amy!" Caleb calls from his truck. "Do you have my cabin key? I think I forgot—"

"Yeah," she pulls the key from her back pocket and jingles it at him. Nathan chuckles. "You left it in Lyndy's room."

He walks back to them. "Well, I had to give her a kiss goodnight. I never see her anymore."

"Uh-huh," Amy drops the keys in Caleb's palm. "And whose fault is that?"

"Mine," Caleb's fingers curl around the keys and then scoops her into a hug. "All mine."

Nathan watches as Amy wraps her arms around him. She leans into Caleb for a quick moment before parting. "See you tomorrow."

Amy pivots from Caleb's truck to Nathan's, parked paralleled beside it. She steps towards him. Fighting the urge to reach for his hand, she tucks her hair behind her ear instead. "So, more cattle drive tomorrow morning and then we can still hang out afterward as planned?" Her reconfirmation statement felt more like a question than she would have liked.

"Yeah." Nathan notices her uncertainty and raises his hand to her shoulder. "Just as planned."

"Mm-kay," she smiles at him. "Goodnight."

His hand drops. "Goodnight, Amy," he whispers and watches her walk back to the house.

He turns back to find Caleb leaning against his truck, with a smirk on his face. Nathan freezes at the know-it-all sparkle in his expression.

Caleb speaks first. "I'm happy for you guys."

It takes a moment for Nathan to adjust himself. He situates himself against his own truck door, crossing his arms. "How did you—"

"Amy told me," Caleb clarifies. "On the way to the clinic."

Nathan nods in the information. He takes his time to speak. "We've been keeping it pretty quiet."

"Oh, I know. I'm not going to say anything," Caleb promises. "I think she just told me because I'm leaving after the cattle drive. We were just catching up."

Nathan recalls Caleb's morning declarations. "I guess I didn't realize you all were so close."

"Seventeen years is a long time…" Caleb nods slowly. "Listen…I never would have stood up to Tim like that if I knew there was a different dynamic in the room. I tend to speak before I think."

"That's okay," Nathan shifts from one foot to the other. "So…" Unsure how to start, he searches for words to convey the dozens of questions he had, but would not dare to ask. "Best friends with both Ty and Amy, huh?"

"Hmm," Caleb smiles to himself, lost in the memories. "I got lucky. Two of the best friends a guy could ask for." His words are met with silence, and Caleb kicks himself as he realizes the intent behind Nathan's question. "But you're not asking about me," he says, an apology appearing on his face.

Nathan waves him off with a half-smile. "No, you know what," he reaches for the truck door. "Maybe it's better that you don't say anything. I really don't know what to ask any—"

"He wanted her to be happy." Caleb jumps in, suddenly able to think fast. Nathan turns around, his interest piqued. "More than them being together. More than his own happiness. Ty was happy when Amy was happy and being herself and doing what she loved. He would sacrifice his happiness and their relationship if he didn't think she was happy."

Nathan shakes his head, still unsure what he wants to hear. "So, he puts Amy and her happiness before himself, sacrifices himself for her—all round great guy."

As if he didn't hear him, Caleb continued in the same reflective tone. Yet, he must have heard him, because suddenly, Caleb was answering the questions Nathan didn't even know he had. "Ty was jealous. There were times they weren't together, and even then, any guy that showed a hint of interest in her, he would go crazy on them. He was badass. He was restless. He couldn't stay still, always off on another adventure. He was overly protective. He was impulsive. He could be reckless. And those things were not a great combination, but his edges softened with time and with Amy. He was driven and passionate about what he did," Caleb paused, not sure of how much more to say. "Ty was a great guy, Nathan. Amy and Ty were great together. No one is going to tell you any differently," Caleb waited until Nathan looked at him to make sure he understood his point. "But they weren't perfect. They had their ups and downs. And since Amy's happiness really was the most important thing in the world to him, you don't need to worry about what kind of guy Ty was. It's more about making Amy happy." Caleb shrugs and pulls his truck keys from his pocket. "And she says you do. So—"

"She did?"

"Hmm," Caleb opens his truck door and then turns back to Nathan. "You don't know how lucky you are. Don't take that for granted."

"I won't. I don't plan to."

"You better not," Caleb warns. "If you hurt her, you're gonna be in big trouble—not just with me—but with Jack and Tim and Lou. Believe me."

"I know." Nathan takes his words as confirmation that he and Amy made the right decision in keeping their new relationship quiet. "If anything, I'm the one that's at risk for being hurt here."

Caleb steps into his truck. "Amy doesn't do that. She has a way of protecting people's hearts." He looks back at Nathan. "Even if things don't work out—she still finds a way to make everything right."

Nathan's forehead creases at Caleb's cryptic words. Before he can say anything, though, Caleb's truck lights beam through the darkness. As the truck backs up and turns towards the main road, Caleb raises a hand out the truck window as a farewell. "See you."

"Bye," Nathan nods back. He returns to his own truck, deep in thought. After one final glance towards the house, he follows Caleb out the driveway.

[writeonthrough]

Namy Nuggets (2/13)

A fanfic collection of Amy and Nathan scenes from CBC’s Heartland. (Catch up on the series here)

Nugget #2: Caleb picks up Amy

“Hello?” Caleb knocks on the Heartland front door as he walks inside. “Anyone here?”

“Caleb,” Lou calls him into the living room. He rounds the corner to find Jack, Tim, and Lou sitting down with Nathan. Jack and Tim greet him with smiles. Lou continues, “Good to see you.”

“Caleb!” Jack stands up to shake his hand. “How the heck are you? We’ve missed you around here.  How’s Colona treating you?”

“It’s alright, but it’s not home.” He looks from Jack to Lou and then back towards Amy’s room.

“Perfect timing, Caleb!” Tim jumps into action mode. “You can help us with the cattle drive this afternoon. We’re down a couple people. We could use your help.”

“Tim, I can’t,” Caleb steps further into the room. “I would love to, but I’m spending the day with Amy and Lyndy today.”

Nathan sits straighter at Caleb’s intentions, but says nothing, watching the interplay between them.

“What? No, no you’re not. She’s just doing a clinic.” Tim laughs to no one’s amusement. “Come on. We need the help.”

“It’s not just a clinic, Tim. It’s a clinic at Ty’s foster youth center.” Caleb shakes his head. He purses his lips before speaking. “Do you know what today is?”

“What?—”

“Oh, my, god,” Lou interjects quietly. “It’s Ty’s birthday.”

Nathan's eyes widen as the room’s atmosphere shifts. He watches as everyone’s expressions drop and their attentions turn to towards Amy’s closed door.

Caleb scoffs. “Father-in-law of the year as always, Tim.”

“Hey!” Tim bites back. “That’s not fair. You have no idea—”

“No idea?” Caleb challenges. “No idea of what? Ty was my best friend for twelve years. I’ve now been best friends with Amy for longer than that. I was best man at their wedding. I’m godfather to Lyndy—”

“We don’t need the list, Caleb—”

“You think I don’t know that you treated him like crap? They were together seven years—were engaged—but Amy literally had to go blind for you to finally accept him as family.”

“What?” Nathan speaks out before he can help himself. The shock of Amy’s history of blindness plus the realization of how long Amy and Ty were together forces him to turn to Lou for confirmation. As Lou focuses between Tim and Caleb, she doesn’t catch the question in Nathan’s expression.

Tim leans back into the chair dismissably. “They weren’t together seven years before—”   

“Sure, they were.” Caleb argues back. “Because even when they weren’t together, they were still together.”

The room goes silent at Caleb’s declaration. While Nathan digests new revelations about Amy and Ty, he senses the room’s tenseness fade.

Caleb’s tone softens, “Is Amy in her room?” He looks at Lou. “She’s not in the barn.”

“Yeah,” Lou gestures towards the back of the house, inviting him in further. “She’s been pretty quiet all day.”

“That makes sense.” Caleb steps back into the hall. “Miracle Girl!” He calls out to Amy. “Let’s go!”

Before he knocks on the door, Lyndy pulls it open. “Uncle Caleb!” She reaches up to him.

“Lyndy Borden!” He exclaims, pulling her into his arms and raising her up to kiss her cheek. “How’s my favorite goddaughter?”

“I’m your only goddaughter,” Lyndy corrects him.

“You are, are you? That makes me pretty lucky.” Caleb shakes her in his arms and she laughs. “I’ll tell you what, though, I do know many cowgirls and you are by far my favorite one.”

“Hmm,” Lyndy thinks. “What about Jade?”

“Oh,” Caleb eyes widen, teasing her. “Well, Jade is pretty cool, but you are still my favorite.”

“Really?”

“Really,” he promises. “Amy?” He knocks on the door and then opens it further. “We’re gonna be late.”  Caleb finds her on the bed, sitting up but not moving, with one leg bent and the other dangling on the floor. “Hey,” he notices the unease in her expression. “Are you okay?” he asks, before shutting the door.

Nathan continues to watch the door as Jack and Tim re-start planning for the cattle drive. He didn’t know what revelation of Caleb’s shocked him the most. He couldn’t decide which one he thought Amy should have told him, if any. For a moment, he wished she had clued him in on all of them. Nathan checks himself: he wonders if that was fair though, given that Caleb had apparently moved away. When or why would Caleb have naturally entered any of their conversations? Even when she told him about the clinic yesterday, he didn’t ask her anything about it.

“Okay,” Caleb re-enters the room with Lyndy on his back. “We’re off.”

To Nathan surprise, Amy appears in the hallway as her normal self with a smile. Maybe she was fine the whole time or, he wonders, did Caleb say something to cheer her up?

Jack reaches for Amy as she passes his chair. “Hey, honey. Sorry we all forgot Ty’s birthday. Are you okay?”

“Yeah, yeah,” she squeezes his hand and then waves him off. “We’ll be back for dinner, okay?”

“Okay,” Lou mentally adds a placemat for Caleb at the dinner table.

“Have fun, honey,” Tim chimes in.

“Thanks, Dad,” Amy takes a step towards the kitchen and then turns back to Nathan. For a moment, it is just them in the room. She smiles at him and he smiles back. She parts her lips to say something and then closes them.

Nathan surprises himself by speaking up in front of her whole family. “Good luck with the clinic, Amy,” he says, still keeping her gaze.

They communicate through silence. Both Amy and Nathan feel calmer and connected just by looking at each other. He knows she means more than her words when she replies to him, “Good luck with the cattle drive.”

With one last secret exchange of smiles with Nathan, Amy follows Caleb and Lyndy out the door.

Nathan watches her hair flow behind her as she leaves. His gaze settles on the front door screen; watching Lyndy jump into the truck and Amy laugh behind her—before Tim calls his attention back to the meeting.

[writeonthrough]

Namy Nuggets: A fanfic collection of interconnected one-shots of Amy and Nathan scenes from CBC's Heartland.

Nugget #1: Birch Tree Meeting Place

Amy slows Shadow down as she turns him from the spanning Heartland fields into a cluster of birch trees. The sound of the nearby brook babbling along calms her after she raced Shadow to arrive on time. She follows the curve of the brook further into the woodland until the water spreads into a small pond. As she dismounts, she spots the blanket laid out on mossy grass and the cowboy standing waiting for her.

“Hey,” she greets Nathan with a slight smile. “Sorry I’m late.”

“Aw,” he reaches for her. She enters his encircling arms. They kiss briefly. “You’re not late. I was early.”

Amy chuckles. “I’m pretty sure I was late. But you’re kind.”

“I try,” He releases her waist, slides his hand down her arm, and guides her to the blanket. He sits comfortably and Amy finds a seat on the blanket between his legs. She rests against his chest while his arms return to their place around her.

They sit for a minute, cuddling in silence, letting the sounds of the babbling brook and the two horses grazing fill the air.

“This is nice,” Amy confesses. “Heartland is so busy. So many people in the house. It nice to get a breather.”

“Too many people?” Nathan questions. “You’re so close with your big family and you’re such a natural with people. It seems like you enjoy being around people.”

“Oh, no,” she turns in his arms to face him. Though her expression is serious, Nathan catches her lighthearted tone. “More than once I’ve been accused of preferring horses to people.”

Nathan smiles into her neck. “Really?”

“Like often,” she emphasizes. “It’s people’s go-to insult about me.”

Nathan chuckles, squeezing her playfully and rocking her from side to side. “Their go-to insult?”

“Yes!” Amy exclaims. “You’d think people would stop after a while.”

“I wouldn’t take that as an insult.” Nathan shrugs. “I prefer horses to people.”

“Hmm, maybe that’s what I like about you,” Amy teases. “I couldn’t figure it out before—” Nathan teases her back with one more squeeze. She sits up in response, pulling away to look at him. “But now it’s clear. That must be the one thing we have in common.”

“The one thing?” He asks, raising his eyebrows.

“I don’t know anything else we have in common,” Amy continues to interplay between her serious and lighthearted tones. “It couldn’t be the ranching—your business is cattle and mine is horses. Those are totally different. It couldn’t be our social lives—You just have Molly to follow you around while I am constantly surrounded by people. So, obviously, I couldn’t possibly enjoy the quiet. Our families are in direct competition with each other and probably would not be happy if they found us here together.” Nathan’s smile fades at her last comment, but she continues, “I mean, all this time we’ve been hanging out, I had no idea what I liked about you.”

“Is that what we’re doing?” Nathan turns serious. He searches her gaze. She notices the vulnerability in his eyes. “Hanging out?”

Amy takes a deep breath and grows somber in his arms. She ducks his gaze by leaning back against his chest. Nathan adjusts his position around her, but only finds comfort again when she speaks. “Hanging out is what we started off doing in our open adjoining fields. Now that we’ve found this new beautiful spot hidden in the middle of these birch trees, I don’t know what I’d say we’re doing.”

“Hmm,” Nathan withholds any further reply. He chooses instead to trace her arm up and down with his fingers and bury his chin in the curve of her neck.

“Whatever we’re doing, it’s important to me.” Amy nuzzles against him. “You’ve made me feel things I haven’t felt in years.” She brings a palm to his cheek and turns him to her. “I’m in this, Nathan.”

He matches her intensity and sincerity as he promises her, “Me too.” He strokes her face with his thumb, bringing her closer. “To all of it.”

Before Amy can respond, Nathan leans down to capture her lips. She meets his kiss with enthusiasm, raising her fingers to the nape of neck and into his hair to pull him closer.  His hand lowers from her cheek and wraps around the small of her back. Their kiss deepens and their surroundings disappear. The sounds of babbling brook, the crickets hidden in grass, and the horses’ tails whipping the flies away all fade away as they embrace.

Nathan pulls back first. Amy gives him a kiss on the cheek before returning to rest against his chest. His hand returns to her cheek as she gives him a small smile.

He hesitates before speaking. “As much as I love it, here, with you,” his arm lowers to her shoulder.  She searches his face, anticipating his point. “We can’t hide out here forever.”

“I thought you wanted to keep things between us,” Amy responds thoughtfully.

“I do,” he assures her. “I do. I just want to be sure on we’re on the same page before someone somehow figures it out.”

“Okay. That’s fair,” She reflects for a moment. “I think we’re on the same page here. I mean we just said we’re in this—together, right?”

“Yeah,” He strokes her arm in reassurance. “We are.”

“Okay, so?” She turns back to him, waiting for him to explain further. When he doesn’t, she offers. “Things don’t have to change, Nathan.” Amy reassures him. “We can still meet here.”

“Amy,” he says softly. “We can’t keep meeting here every day and then pretending we barely know each other around our families.”

“Okay,” Amy catches the slight edge to his words. “And would you like that to change? Because,” she keeps a neutrality to her voice, hoping to sound curious rather than accusatory, “Last time we talked about it, you didn’t.”

“It was a mutual decision,” Nathan corrects her.

“Okay,” Amy nods in his reply. “And now it’s not?”

“No. Yes.” He detangles this bodies and throws his arms in air. “I don’t know.” He plants his hands behind him and leans back. “I don’t know how much longer we can keep hiding this. And I don’t know how we’re going to start to being seen together—”

“Oh, there’s no starting.” Amy interrupts, “Once one person in my family knows, everyone is going to know—”

“Yeah,” Nathan nods. “Kind of my point here.”

“Okay…” Amy repeats herself again, still trying to figure out what he wanted. “So…do you want to start telling people?”

“No,” he tries to speak seriously. “I don’t want to tell people. What I want is for people to know we’re together without having to explain or defend anything to anyone.”

“Ah. Very admirable goal,” Amy smiles, repositioning herself across from him. “Good luck with that.”

“Yeah,” he laughs. “That’s what I thought.”

“There’s probably a middle ground,” Amy offers, hesitating slightly. “Where we don’t have to be as private about it and we don’t say anything either.” She notices him perk up at the idea. “But people are going to start asking questions sooner or later.”

“So, we ease into it,” He leans forward. “I kind of like that.”

“There’s no guarantee it’ll work, through,” she warns. “One person could catch something right away and the inquires could come on as an onslaught.”

“Yeah,” he agrees with a nod. “They could.”

For a moment, they sit in silence, letting the magnitude of the change in their relationship and the change in their decisions about it sit between them.

Amy scoots closer to him. She extends her leg out so her foot nudges his leg in reassurance. “As long as we know we’ll get through it together, I’m sure it’ll be fine.”

“Together,” he leans forward for a kiss. “Sounds like a plan.”

“Good,” Amy settles it.

“So…” Nathan imagines being around her whole family this coming weekend. “What does that mean for the cattle drive tomorrow?”

“Oh,” Amy starts seriously. She crosses her legs on the blanket, sitting up straighter. “I’m not going on the cattle drive.”

“What?” He retreats in surprise. “Why? Is it Lyndy?”

“No, no. Lyndy is coming with me,” Amy points across the field. “I’m doing a horse clinic. I’ll be gone most of the day.” 

“Oh,” Nathan quiets in reflection. “I thought you’d be there tomorrow. I was looking forward to it.”

“You’ll just have to tolerate my dad and grandpa without me,” Amy smiles, “Sorry.”

“You’re leaving me to the wolves, huh?”

She chuckles. “Lou will be there. It shouldn’t be that bad.”

“It just…” he searches for something to say. “It won’t be the same without you.”

“It’ll be fine,” she promises. She uncrosses her legs, “Speaking of tomorrow, I actually have to go prep some things,” she stands and brushes off. “I wish I could stay…”

“No, no,” Nathan stands after her, “I should go too.” When she steps off the blanket, he tugs it up and rolls it together.

Amy starts to mount Shadow, but then turns back to him, her long hair flipping around her. “Umm…” she reaches for him and he steps into her arms. “Thanks for the people break.”

He smiles, “Anytime.” He leans in for a kiss and she meets him a final time, stroking his cheek as she does so. “I’ll see you later.”

“See you,” she promises. She looks at him once more before turning and mounting Shadow, riding off, out of their birch tree-covered hideaway.

[writeonthrough]

Welcome to my new otp ship!!

I've been so excited to see Amy and Nathan in Season 17...and now in Season 18--they've inspired me to return to writing fanfiction over the summer. Amy deserves to be happy.

I will be posting my 'Namy Nuggets' fanfiction here soon, a collection of interconnected one-shots that were a blast to write and should be fun to read. I hope it finds some Heartland/Namy fans who are looking forward to seeing them in the new season.

Amy and Nathan in the Heartland - Season 18 Trailer

[writeonthrough]

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