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now 2 beanie baby dragons are crossing your dash together :3

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“can’t two men just be friends?” no actually. if they’re close it means they fuck nasty. Hope this helps

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Me Giving a Pressed Conference: our advocacy for the disabled must include the addict, the imperfect victim, those we despise; the right to autonomy and life cannot devolve into a popularity contest

Reporter I Hate (Not Sexual Tension): Does that include all the attendees of the Bored Ape NFT event who went blind

Me: *Blood streaming from my nostrils and eyes* david, it includes everyone

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sends me into the stratosphere every time

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you ever see a post and know immediately “oh i’m integrating this one into my vocabulary”

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i forget who made the post but "if you would transition in a heartbeat in a more accepting society then you are in fact trans" really helps me when i need it

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engels: heyyy king I saw your manuscript about how the bourgeoisie are trash and I just wanted to let you know that I agree. although I myself am bourgeois, (i know, ugh) i am on your side. “one of the good ones” as some may say. btw I never even noticed how big your beard is till now but its awesome

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Gold perfume bottle with garnets, Black Sea Region, Sarmatian, 2nd century BC

from The State Hermitage Museum, St. Petersburg

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“The Driver” by Jordan Bolton

My first book ‘Blue Sky Through the Window of a Moving Car’ is out now! Order it here - https://smarturl.it/BlueSky

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the problem with driving is its realtime when it should be turn-based

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when band members smile at each other while playing man that’s when my life is just rainbows 

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curious to hear y'all's suggestions for the worst possible pasta shape

(Assume that "pasta" needs to be made of sheets or strands of dough with enough surface area relative to thickness so that they can be cooked.)

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It's over