wondermaster

[wondermaster]

a bittersweet ending

audrey emmett// caitlyn siehl// quote: these unforgettable things, s. l. gray ,edit: ?// carissa potter carlson// closure, taylor swift// sue zhao// nineteen minutes, jodi picoult// closure, taylor swift// the letters of sylvia plath volume I: 1940–1956// ?// extremely loud and incredibly close, jonathan safran foer// ?// ?// cough it out, the front bottoms

[wondermaster]

Sue Zhao

[wondermaster]

Sometimes you just have to say to yourself, I’m going to let myself be happy today, I’m going to have a good day and not feel guilty or worried or undeserving of it. And I don’t know what will happen tomorrow, but that’s okay and that’s okay and that’s okay because I’ll deal with it when it happens and that’ll be okay too.

[wondermaster]

Is it better to keep someone you’re in love with in your life as a friend and let it kill you to see them love someone else, or to let them go?

The writer in me says keep them in your life. It makes for a beautiful story. The friend in me tells you to let them go. Give yourself a chance to heal. Give yourself a chance to move on. 

Don’t listen to the writer. Listen to the friend. 

Best case scenario, one day you will see them just platonically and that will work for both of you. Worst case scenario, they become a cherished memory and you fall in love with somebody who loves you back. 

[wondermaster]

Nineteen.

You fall in love with a boy who can’t pronounce your last name. Who never asks if you’re okay. Who kisses too hard and without permission. You mistake it for passion.

Ten days before Christmas he takes his passion too far. Throws it against the window; smashing glass as he goes. When he’s done, he leaves you to pick up the shards with your shaky hands. Then, he insists on driving you to the train station. You just try not to cry.

By Spring, the window has been replaced by double glazing. You never do tell your friends why. They still refer to him as the charming one. You prefer not to describe the blood on his hands.

You wonder about charm, passion and violence. Are they really so inextricably linked?

Is violence passion? You think. Is it just another word for love?

No. No. No. You’re sure of it now.

Why did you ever think it was?

Sue Zhao || “A Culture”

[wondermaster]

[wondermaster]

People are impermanent. The love of your life will leave you. On a Sunday morning, they’ll kiss you for the last time.

You won’t know it’s the last time, of course. You rarely do.

Later, when thinking back to it, you’ll try to remember whether they lingered for just a moment before they broke away. You’ll try to remember the placement of their hands.

Much later still, you’ll become stuck on the memory of how you met. How you fell in love with their mind. How they surprised you. How they challenged you to become a better person.

You’ll spend Friday evenings trying to disentangle them from your psyche. Like finding an endless array of their socks at the bottom of your drawer. Wishing they would disappear yet being unable to throw them out.

On bad nights, you want to scream. How could you? Of all the people in the world, you were supposed to stay. Out of all the temporality, all that transience - you were meant to be the exception.

You think about calling them, if only to receive a reminder of their voice on the answerphone. You almost do, but something stops you. You remember a poem you read a long time ago. It went something like - 

People are impermanent. The love of your life will leave you. On a Sunday morning, they’ll kiss you for the last time.

Sue Zhao | Nothing but Strawberries

[wondermaster]

““It never stops hurting, does it?” “What?” “Giving someone the best of you and watching them choose someone else.””

— S.Z. // Excerpt from a book I’ll never write #83

[wondermaster]

@blossomfully || Sue Zhao

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“Of course I wanted him. Of course I did. But he was leaving and that was the only piece of truth which resulted from this whole mess. He was leaving and I felt as though someone had punched me in the stomach. He was leaving and I spent all of my time wishing he wasn’t.”

— Sue Zhao   (via blossomfully)

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“Learn to protect yourself without becoming cold and shutting yourself off entirely.”

— Why is this so difficult (via blossomfully)

[wondermaster]

“You don’t really stop talking about it,“ I tell her. "You just learn to start turning it into metaphors.””

— Sue Zhao 

[wondermaster]

“Aren’t you tired?” I asked. “What of?” she looked up. “All the endings,” I said. “All of the beginnings and the hoping and the dreaming and the wondering. All of the happiness, and then all of the uncertainty and heartbreak. “Aren’t you tired of the way everything good always ends?”

— Sue Zhao (via blossomfully)

[wondermaster]

Can somebody please explain why love turns you into the dorkiest most awkward human being in the world omg

[wondermaster]

[wondermaster]

But happens when the "right" person leaves?

“With the right person, it feels simple. Even when it’s difficult it feels simple. Because you never question if it’s worth it. You know the answer is yes.”

— Sue Zhao

[wondermaster]

Read the full article here: 

7 Tips to Set Healthy Boundaries with Others

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