wolfintumblland

[wolfintumblland]

The reason the break up fell flat isn’t complicated. It was because it was written using a tired biphobic trope. The end.

Before anyone says, you’d be mad about it no matter what, you’re just grasping for an excuse to be mad. No. Because.

There’s a difference between being disappointed they broke up, and furious with how it was written. I think a lot of us fall into the later because these tropes are exhausting and harmful.

I could have been completely fine about them breaking up if they had picked any other path. And there were so many to choose from! But instead it felt more like a slap in the face to the bi community. What a time to be pulling this shit.

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I really hope we have a scene where Bobby and Buck talk about the break up and his only advice is, “You don’t need me to tell you what to do, you already know I think he’s good for you.”

I actually hope everyone says that to him in their own way, basically just “why aren’t you fighting for him?!”

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“omg why are you bt shippers acting like we didn’t have queer rep since day one oh em gee yall just care about bucktommy”

firstly the fact that it comes from the same group that accused oliver of queer baiting for years is rich.

other than that i’ve said it a hundred times and i say it again, this show has queers in it but does not treat them right!!

god forbid josh be more that maddie’s little gay bestie ( the last time he went on a date he got fucking beat up)

henren’s last kiss was apparently in 6.06! remember when karen said something like their marriage doesn’t feel like a marriage but a sisterhood years ago??? their child almost died in front of them but they didn’t even huged!

we are not gonna see michael and david again ( yes bcz of the things that happened in irl but still)

buck is apparently a confused baby bi cuz god forbid if bisexuals know what they want

and tommy is gonna be alone forever (something that is possible the same ending for josh too) cuz gay men will always be alone

so you tell me if only including queer characters like this is really representation or not??

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if I'm honest I think that Tommy is okay for a while. I don't think he cries or breaks down when he leaves. I think he goes home and cracks a beer and doesn't think. he wakes up the next morning and goes to work and doesn't think. he sends a text in the harbor gc: plans changed. free this weekend and doesn't think, doesn't even respond to the barrage of ??? He works on his truck, finally power washes his deck, and upgrades the weather stripping in his house and he's fine.

But then he lets his guard down. He catches the Lakers game on TV at the station and he wonders if Evan is there. He spots Evan's aftershave in a CVS and swears he can still smell the way it clung to his skin. He turns the overhead fan on before bed, and it strikes him that he'd picked up the habit when Evan had started sleeping over and just hadn't stopped. And each crack that forms splits him open a little more every time. He copes, but it's harder now. He skips nights out and stops going to Muay Thai. He's tired and he can't help but ache for the nights that Evan would stay with him, arms around him, tight and too hot, but loving and so sweet. He tries to throw himself into work as much as he can but he can't stop thinking about what he lost. What he gave up on.

And then I think he waits. He sits with the hurt for as long as he can, content, in a way, to keep it contained to himself. He tries to control the spread because the last thing he wants is to break Evan like this. And he manages, but he doesn't get over it. How could he? But when he crosses paths with Evan again, a few weeks or months later, he sees the same splinters and he thinks about how those cracks are from him. His responsibility. And the sudden desire to mend them burns hot enough that he can't stop himself from asking how are you? Are you broken like me? Can I fix it? Please let me fix it. I know how. I'm good with my hands, I'll stop any more damage.

And when Evan looks at him, takes his hands, and responds as long as you'll let me fix yours the rush of it hits him. The color comes sweeping back into his world and he cries. How could he not? And he feels Evan's hands on his cheeks, brushing the tears away, and he's okay.

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break/mend

buck & eddie/bucktommy - rated t - 1.4k words - post 8.06

“You were gone a while,” Eddie says, punctuating the statement with a swig from his beer.

Buck shrugs as he slides into the booth. He takes up his own beer, just this side of too warm, but he swallows it down anyway, prefers that to the taste still lingering in his mouth.

“Line for the bathroom was long,” he lies.

“Mhm. That yours, or his?” Eddie asks, gesturing towards Buck’s wrist. Buck glances down and blows a breath out his nose at the come stain on the cuff of his shirt. 

“Fuck,” he swears. He wets a napkin with the condensation off his beer and scrubs at it, not that that does much. He feels Eddie’s eyes on him, heavy as a dumbbell. “Whatever judgment you’ve got brewing you can save,” he says, snappier than usual on the heels of an unsatisfying orgasm. He feels sorry for it as soon as he says it, but when he drags his eyes up to meet Eddie’s, he doesn’t find the hurt or anger he probably deserves.

Eddie just looks sad. Not about what he’d said, but for him, and that’s infinitely worse.

read the rest on ao3

[wolfintumblland]

Facebook Official

whoops my hand slipped and I banged out 1800 words of fix-it fic in like an hour. btw i think the Abby connection is dumb but I'm making it work.

Three years after reconciling with Buck, newly engaged to him, Tommy gets a phone call from a certain former dispatcher...who's just seen some interesting news via a Facebook Relationship Status post.

*****

(also on AO3)

To say that the phone call blindsided him would have been the understatement of the century.

He was just sitting at home watching the game, having a beer, minding his own business. Evan was on shift — must be a busy one, he’d only gotten two text messages all evening, one bitching about not having had time to eat dinner and the other about idiots who texted while driving.

His phone rang. Unknown number. Normally he wouldn’t have picked up, but with all the wedding preparations, a lot of vendors were calling. It was a little late to be making business calls, just after 8 pm, but he’d quickly learned that business norms meant little in the wedding planning business. “Hello?”

“Tommy?”

“Yes?” A woman’s voice. Familiar, but he couldn’t place it.

Pause “You’re marrying Buck??” A slightly hysterical note of disbelief entered the woman’s voice as she said the name.

And all at once, he knew who it was. Shit fuck motherfucker why didn’t we get ahead of this one.

“Abby. Um…”

“Evan Buckley? My ex-fiancé and my ex-boyfriend are marrying each other?”

“Small world, huh?” he said, going for levity.

“Buck’s not even gay!”

“No, he’s not. He’s bisexual.”

“I’m…okay. I’m sorry, it’s just…this is a lot of information to get all at once.”

“How did you even find out? Don’t you live in Phoenix?”

“Buck posted one of those relationship status things on Facebook.”

“Oh. I barely use Facebook.”

“Me either, but Buck does, and I hadn’t been on there in awhile, but I logged on and that was like the third post I saw!”

Tommy remembered the day Buck had made the post. They hadn’t really put their relationship on social media much - Buck posted photos of them on Instagram sometimes - and he hadn’t done one of those stupid relationship status things for them until they got engaged. They’d trawled their phones for the right pic, eventually settling on one taken at a 118 barbecue of them together, smiling, arms slung around waists. He hadn’t said so, but he’d gotten a little emotional over what Evan wrote on the post:

Evan Buckley is engaged to Tommy Kinard.

“It’s been a long road, but we made it. Can’t wait to spend the rest of my life with this man. He’s the best person I’ve ever known. I love you!”

“Well…I’m sorry that was an unpleasant surprise for you,” Tommy said, carefully.

She sighed. “I don’t know that it was���unpleasant. But a surprise, for sure. How do you even know Buck? How did you meet?”

“We’re both firefighters, it’s not that surprising that we could have met, is it?”

“No, I guess not.”

“And he was at my old firehouse. The one you refused to ever come to. But I guess you went when you were with him, didn’t you?”

“You never wanted me to meet your friends. I guess I found out why when you broke off our engagement.”

“I’m sorry, Abby. I know I said it then, but I’ll say it again now. I lied to myself, I lied to a lot of people. It took me almost trapping you in my lie, when you did not deserve that, to break me out of it.”

“I forgave you ages ago. We don’t have to go over all that again.”

“I met Evan…I guess it’s four years ago? We started dating not long after. I, um…was the first man he dated. I guess I made him realize some things about himself.”

“Just transforming lives everywhere you go, huh?” she said, a teasing note entering her voice. Tommy was happy to hear it.

“Yeah, well, I almost screwed it up. I broke up with him six months later. He was diving in headfirst, too fast, just all in and wanting to move in with me.”

“That sounds just like Buck.”

“I panicked and ended it before I could get in any deeper with him.”

“It was too late, wasn’t it?”

“Yeah. I was already in love with him.”

“He’s easy to love. Too easy,” she said, quietly. “But you got back together, obviously.”

“Took a little while. Almost a year. I dated a few guys, he dated a few people, but nothing stuck for either of us - I know now it’s because we were still hung up on each other. We have a friend in common and we’d hear about each other through him…but I didn’t really see him until we ended up on a major incident call together. I sustained a minor injury - just a scrape, really - and Hen from his house patched me up. I was sitting there on the ambulance deck, more or less left to myself, and he came waltzing up with that eyebrow raised like he knew all my secrets.” Abby chuckled, like she knew the exact expression he was describing. “He just said, are you done being fucking stupid yet?”

“And you were.”

“Yep. I was. He took me home that night and we’ve barely been apart since. Got engaged a year later.”

“You sound happy.”

“I am. I’m ecstatic. I can’t believe I got a second chance with him. I kicked myself for ending it like that, I don’t know what came over me.”

“I do. You thought you weren’t enough for him to want to keep you.”

He nodded. “Yeah.”

“That’s dumb.”

“That’s what he says.”

They sat there not speaking for what felt like a long time.

“Well…” Abby said. “I feel like I just unloaded on you out of the blue.”

“You kinda did,” he said, smiling.

“Maybe I shouldn’t have called.”

“I’m glad you did. You know…Evan and I didn’t realize we had you in common until our six month anniversary dinner. In fact, it was that revelation that sort of started us on the way to breaking up for awhile. But that’s been so long now and it hasn’t come up in a few years. I almost forgot about it.”

“Gee, thanks,” she said, her grin audible. “I’m glad you’re both happy. I have a lot of regret over Buck, how I left things with him. I assume he’s told you.”

“He has. If it helps, he doesn’t have any bad feelings towards you.”

“It does help. Thank you for that.” She sighed. “I’ll let you go. I just saw that Facebook post and spiralled a little bit.”

“Understandable.”

“Please tell Buck I say hello. And I wish you both so much happiness, Tommy.”

“Thank you. And I will.”

She hung up. Tommy stared at the phone for a moment, then opened his text message thread with Evan.

You’re not gonna believe what just happened.

*****

When Evan got home at 7 am, they had their usual two hours to share breakfast and maybe a quick fuck before Tommy had to be on shift himself. They tried to sync their schedules so their off days coincided, but it didn’t always work.

“Holy shit, why didn’t we get ahead of that one?” Evan said as he burst in the door, not even bothering with “hello.” His shoes and duffel went flying and he bustled into the kitchen where Tommy was mixing the pancake batter.

“Yeah, I had the same thought,” he said, leaning over to kiss him hello.

Evan went to the coffee pot. “I didn’t even think about it, that she might see.”

“Neither did I.”

“How’d she sound?”

“Really surprised at first. Incredulous, even? Like in the what-are-the-odds way.”

“Kinda like when I found out we’d both dated her.”

“Yeah, but you’re my himbo now,” Tommy said, smirking. “No, she was just shocked. I gave her the quick rundown, and she ended up congratulating us.”

“Did you tell her it’s her fault we broke up for a year?” Evan said, popping a strawberry into his mouth.

“I think the proper person to bear the fault is me.”

“And also me. Who asks someone to move in after six months? Before even saying ‘I love you?’ And when you had a house!”

“I say we blame Josh. He got you all juiced up with that damn Glee speech.” After they’d reconciled, Evan had given him chapter and verse on his mind-boggling thought processes on that last fateful day.

“He got me feeling guilty, is what he did. That I judged you for lying to Abby. Overcorrecting is one of my special gifts.”

“Yes, it is.”

“Well, while I’m overcorrecting…why don’t we invite her?”

Tommy looked up. “To our wedding?”

“Sure, why not? She can flip a coin whose side she sits on,” Evan said, grinning like the mischievous imp that he was.

“Evan, darling, love of my life, we are not inviting our ex to our wedding.”

He scrunched up his face. “Ew. ‘Our’ ex? Makes it sound like we were in a throuple.”

“Ew, indeed.”

He cocked his head. “I dunno, though. The thought’s kinda sexy.”

“Not to me! No vaginas anywhere near my bedroom. Kinsey 6, remember?”

“Of course, my apologies.”

Tommy looked at his innocent wide-eyed face for a few beats. “You’re still thinking about it, aren’t you?”

“Can I help it if the thought of two people I have found intensely attractive doing sexy things is appealing?”

“Can I help it if the thought of Chris Hemsworth going down on you has gotten me through some lonely nights?”

“Okay, I get the point. Shutting up now.” 

Tommy put a plate of pancakes in front of him. “Your shift okay?”

“Fine. Busy. I’m a bit wired. Do we have time for me to bounce on your dick for a bit before you have to head out?”

“For that, I’ll make time.” He sat down at the table at Evan’s side with his own pancakes. Evan slid a hand over and squeezed his thigh.

“Missed you, though,” he said, chewing.

“I always miss you when you’re on shift,” Tommy said.

Evan looked up at that, meeting his eyes. “Tommy, sometimes I miss you when you get up to get a beer.”

The simplicity, the sincerity of it made his chest tighten a little. He leaned forward, put his fingers under Evan’s chin and pulled him into a soft kiss, just like the first time. “I love you,” he whispered. 

“I love you, too.”

“And we are not inviting my ex-fiancee who is also your ex-girlfriend to our wedding.”

Evan grinned. “Deal.”

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Bucktommy + Complimenting each other

[wolfintumblland]

Something I love is that even after this episode and finding out that Tommy's story is apparently done, my dash has been busier than ever. Yes, some people left, but the ones who stayed are more passionate about Tommy than ever. Like, certain "fans" thought getting Tommy out of the picture would make us disappear, but we're more present than we were before.

love that for us!

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buck after 3 failed first dates: this sucks i wanna meet someone the traditional way [we steal an LAFD helicopter and fly into a hurricane to save people from a capsized cruise ship]

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wasn't it revealed that it was lfj you wanted the first bucktommy kiss to be soft and sweet? in hindsight, maybe both tim and oliver both wanted to do the "let buck fuck" thing from the very beginning if the original plan for the kiss was actively changed due to lfj's personal wishes of how they should handle buck's bisexual arc, i.e. with care and love...

Yes, it was supposed to be a make out scene and Lou asked if the first kiss could be soft. He didn’t want tommy to seem predatory, especially with being older than buck and the fact that he was buck’s first kiss with another man. Lou cared about this arc from the start, and treated it with the respect it deserved. Shame Tim didn’t follow that lead.

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me ignoring canon and living in my happy bucktommy endgame world 💕

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Tommy Kinard, King Of One Liners™️

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7.05 | 8.06

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I am honestly shocked (as a pretty unbiased party) at the GA’s reaction to the bucktommy breakup. I’d hedge a bet that Tim and co are too! I think they knew that bucktommy was fairly well received (by the general audience and not the loud minority) but i don’t think that they realised those same people who were so flippant about Buck’s prior love interests would keep caring to the extent they have. That people would care enough to express their disappointment in a rational manner - not resorting to name calling etc etc. I do wonder where they plan to go from here (or if they even have a plan) because the idea that Buck jumps back to sleeping around now or diving head first into another relationship eight seasons in…. is jarring and i do wonder how the GA will react to that after this week

I think you’ve brought up an important point re: the reaction to prior love interests, and the funny thing is Tim and his staff only have themselves to blame.

Everyone Buck has been with before Tommy has been a woman. Buck was, for all intents and purposes, perceived as straight. It’s not that difficult to get an audience on board with a hetero relationship, right?

Except the audience was able to bounce back from every breakup because the effort wasn’t there. In fact, I’d bet the relationship the audience cared about most was BuckAbby, but they can’t do anything about Connie only signing for the one season. (And just to cover all my bases, sure, you could say that "effort" was made with BuckTaylor given how much screen time they had, but the audience also had the entire half of 5B to prepare for a break up after the BuckLucy kissing scene!) Now here comes Tommy. He already has established relationships with members of the 118, relationships that have nothing to do with Buck. His first episode in s7 showed him helping the 118 not only rescue Bathena, but going behind people's backs to do it so nobody got in trouble. Episode four establishes that he has also made a friend in Eddie, which is a first for these love interests! If Tommy and Eddie can get along, this time might be different, right? After the kiss in Buck's loft, which the GA obviously didn't hate, they have a conversation after a disastrous date, about wanting to see where things go. Buck was happy. People were gonna like that. The wedding episode is, IMO, where Tim started to slip up. We didn't just see Buck bringing Tommy as his plus-one and introducing him to everybody. We saw Tommy show up to the hospital still in his firefighter gear after an emergency. We saw that he wanted to keep his promise to Buck to be there for the wedding, to show that he, too, was serious about seeing where the relationship could go. We saw Buck kiss him. In public. No shame, no regrets. We also saw their dinner scene in the finale. Not interrupted by Eddie's drama. We saw Tommy still being important enough to the story in 8x01 to be present for Christopher's "birthday party". And then we saw everything that came with 8x05. The fandom can take its victory lap and say "the writing was on the wall", but the general audience? All they saw were two men slowly (possibly) falling in love. Tommy was never actually portrayed as the wrong partner in canon. In fact, he was everything the previous weren't. Every single thing this fandom used as an excuse for why these relationships wouldn't work? Tommy was the anomaly. First responder? Check. Friendly with Eddie? Check. Forms some sort of relationship with Chris? Check. Makes Buck a priority? Check. Isn't sidelined for Buddie scenes? Check. Yep, maybe Tim really did do all those things so that when the breakup actually happened it would leave an impact. But how fucking obtuse do you (Tim) have to be to not realize just how important seeing Buck in a happy, healthy relationship - what little we got of it! - was going to be for the audience? Especially when much of that audience has stuck with you through six seasons of the same old shit? How can you be unprepared for the backlash when YOU are the reason people care this much in the first place?

[wolfintumblland]

I think what’s only going to piss off people more is if we don’t see Buck even trying to fight for this relationship, you don’t just give up at the first hurdle and go home after what was just said.

I want to see Buck pissed off, what Tommy said was shitty and unfair. I want to see Buck behave like that was the important relationship we knew it was and that he knew it was. I also want to see Buck give Tommy some grace because he grew up in a world that was more harsher to gay men, that he had to protect himself. I need to see Buck acknowledge that Tommy basically admited he’s in love with him.

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I really want a fic where Buck decides he's going to romcom Tommy into wanting to fight for them by showing up literally everywhere Tommy is so he can't forget about him or get over him

like karaoke trivia? Buck's already at the table next to the table Tommy's group normally sits with a sheepish looking Eddie sitting next to him

BBPU games? he's there cheering everyone on from the sidelines (no ankles will be hurt this time!)

Muay Thai? he makes Eddie bring him to the studio where Tommy practices and spends half the night ogling him and half the night dodging fists (he really doesn't know the first thing about Muay Thai)

the Lakers game Tommy got him tickets for? he shows up at Tommy's door two hours before the game because he thinks he's going to have to convince him, but Tommy opens the door already dressed, with a fondly exasperated expression on his face

the plant exchange/repotting workshop Tommy mentioned once in passing while they were still together? Buck is there even though he's not sure Tommy will be. (he does show up and he sits next to him and calls him Evan as he helps him with the plant he brought along to repot and Buck is trying so, so hard not to get his hopes up, but Tommy's hand brushed his and he looked happy to see him and and and)

they keep this up for a while and it's good having him in his life still, but Buck obviously wants more and he thinks Tommy does too so maybe one night, months later, after karaoke trivia when they're waiting for their Ubers, a little buzzed and laughing at some joke one of Tommy's friends made earlier, buck's heart feeling too big in his chest seeing Tommy look happy, he kisses him. it's misaligned and sloppy because they're both smiling, but Tommy kisses him back after a moment. the smiles melt from their faces and the kiss deepens and suddenly there are tears in Buck's eyes

they cancel their Ubers and sit on the curb and they talk, finally, months too late, but maybe it's actually the right time after all because Tommy comes into it understanding that Buck is willing to fight for him, for them.

and Buck says Tommy deserves to be happy, that they both do, that they could find happiness together if they let themselves. and Tommy's been running his whole life, but maybe he doesn't want to run from this anymore, maybe he wants to try staying for once

[wolfintumblland]

they were so cute here 😣