"Everyone knows elves are pussies." Private Eric Cartman RP Blog Default verse in Stick of Truth Written by Tiki Please read rules thoroughly before interacting.
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@technonewkid & @wizardfatass
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[ Vivian ]:
She’s just kinda staring at him with a blank look on her face.
Just turns around. “Anyway, where’s Clyde and Tweek? I gotta give them love too.” Starts walking away.
Excuse him? Did she just completely ignore him? Unbelievable!
“What the fuck?! I’m over here, too, you commie bitch!”
#x Written in The Scrolls || Text#technonewkid#[ i've been stewing on this all day#and suddenly eric dragged himself out of the pool#much to kyle's annoyance#to show how upset he is ]
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a few snippets from a really long wendy string that I found to be cute/funny
#x Listen Closely || Audio#x Not Lame || Musings#x Self Righteous Bitch || Wendy Testaburger#x Your Dad Fucked Your Mom || Fractured but Whole verse
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🎃
#x Visions of The Past || Photos#x Pissbaby Traitor || Stan Marsh#x Pussy Ass High Jew Elf || Kyle Broflovski#x The Grand Wizard || Eric Cartman#x Piece of Shit Princess || Kenny McCormick#x We've Got This || Queue
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tumblr
Do you see anything?
#x For Coonstagram || Videos#x Pissbaby Traitor || Stan Marsh#x The Grand Wizard || Eric Cartman#x Pussy Ass High Jew Elf || Kyle Broflovski#x We've Got This || Queue
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Space Dust - Submitted by Aliensatemybabysitter
#0A1F3F #261B66 #501B6B #871D60 #FFEDBC
#x Visions of The Past || Photos#x Not Lame || Musings#x Magic Missile || Stick of Truth (Default) verse#x We've Got This || Queue
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just a typical morning walk to school
#x Visions of The Past || Photos#x Goody Goody Paladin || Butters Stotch#x The Grand Wizard || Eric Cartman#x Piece of Shit Princess || Kenny McCormick#x Pussy Ass High Jew Elf || Kyle Broflovski#x Pissbaby Traitor || Stan Marsh#x We've Got This || Queue
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#x Visions of The Past || Photos#x Pissbaby Traitor || Stan Marsh#x The Grand Wizard || Eric Cartman#x Piece of Shit Princess || Kenny McCormick#x We've Got This || Queue
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Kenny (& the boys) playing.
#x Visions of The Past || Photos#x Pissbaby Traitor || Stan Marsh#x Pussy Ass High Jew Elf || Kyle Broflovski#x Piece of Shit Princess || Kenny McCormick#x The Grand Wizard || Eric Cartman#x We've Got This || Queue
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[ Fucking Ghost ]:
Stan was not having it. After seeing what ‘Kenny’ found out, Stan was tossing things left and right, throwing objects and suddenly breaking things on impact like a lamp that was resting on the end table. Luckily, the lamp didn’t short circuit and start a fire, but damn— was he wishing that it would have.
Sure, Stan had no contact with the mortal realm, but if he could knock over inanimate objects in rage– then by god– he was going to fucking do just that! He began to throw things across the room, it slamming up against the side of the wall with the loudest thud you could imagine.
Then it hit him. Soon after, he picked up and object before starting to hurdle them toward Eric himself.
As soon as the first thing hit him, Eric dove down to the other side of his bed, grabbing a pillow as he did and holding it over his head. He didn’t know what the hell had prompted this attack, but it was pissing him off.
“Get the fuck out of my house, you piece of shit!”
He just wanted to sleep. He had stuff to do the next day, and if this ghost was going to throw things at him, he wasn’t going to get anywhere.
“How about you go piss off someone who cares?!”
#x Written in The Scrolls || Text#elvenraisedwarrior#x Pissbaby Traitor || Stan Marsh#x Kyle's Stupid Ghost || Blinky#x The Opportunity to Begin Again || Vlogger verse
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wizardfatass:
Before Eric could even start to oppose, the voice to his right spoke up.
“They’re all in one place. I’m the only one who has access. I can get those to you as soon as we wrap up here.”
Standing up from his chair, Eric shoved Kyle away from the side of his desk. He wasn’t going to let them do this. He didn’t give up his employees this easily, especially when they were at the top of their game.

“No, wait! We’re not giving up that easily…”
Kyle caught himself on one of the file cabinets, glaring at Eric as he kept up the fight. The man himself pointed toward said cabinets.
“At the time of recording, he was under my copyright…I’m still half owner of those, you know.”
“Let it go, Eric. You can’t win this… I wrote our contract. It literally says that if the performer chooses, your ownership claim is out the window.”
The bitterness in his voice resulted from a private dispute between them. Eric’s eyes narrowed, understanding the implication. As much as he wanted to immediately follow up on that threat, he didn’t. Showing weakness in front of their competitors was something he’d never do.
Instead, he sighed and sat back down, spinning his chair back toward Craig.
“I can’t give you all of them. We need to keep certain ones until April. Tax reasons. You understand.”
Kyle didn’t call him out on his bullshit, and frankly, he was fine with that.
Craig sighed. “Fine, but if you uphold the name my name also has to be on it… Kenny’s work now all belongs to me no matter if you produced it or not.”
Craig waved his hand as Token appeared in the room in some business casual, nodding his head to Kyle. Token, aka, Craig’s Lawyer, was sure to take Cartman on in this case.
"And if you don’t comply, I’m sure taking this to court would suit you better, yes…?“
Craig gave a sly smirk before feeling the need to get up finally, looking over at Token before the two bowing his head with a softly ‘Gentleman’ as the two started to leave. He wasn’t going to listen to any more of Cartman’s dribble to get out of this situation one way or another. If you talked more, the more Cartman was given wiggle room to use against you.
#x Written in The Scrolls || Text#thiefofzaron#x RP || Business Dealings#x Complaining Thief || Craig Tucker#x That's Show Business || Performer verse#x End Thread
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[ The Thief ]:
"I suppose not…“
Jon replied softly, dull eyes watching the Wizard King, but could he really trust the other’s words? Could he really be telling the truth? Probably not, only playing words to fit Jon into their little game— however— he wouldn’t let that happen.
The thief looked at the open land before sighing softly, lowering his head before looking at the King. He would continue silently playing this game of the Wizard King’s to see what it will lead to.
”What do you suppose we do…? Quinn has obviously left and joined their side… they will use that to their advantage.“
The wizard sighed. He had expected her to change sides. She was too soft to understand that she was under an unnatural influence. He’d thought perhaps her efficiency in magic would help her to see through the ruse, but her loss wasn’t too big. They could do without her.

“Do you want them to have that advantage over you? If you care about your sister, that’ll only make things more difficult. In this war, there are no familial ties. The only way to break the spell on her, so to speak, is to kill her.”
He understood that may be a radical suggestion, but as someone who had never had a sibling, he’d never had to choose between his own prosperity and family. He also had no ties to his own family since they had simply been in his way. The wizard cared much more about himself than he did about anyone else. He couldn’t care less about other people if they didn’t have any useful qualities.
#x Written in The Scrolls || Text#distrustnbetrayal#x Buttfucking Traitor || Jon Burke#x Magic Missile || Stick of Truth (Default) verse
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[ Kenny ]:
"You are a sick sack of shit, Cartman…“
Kenny said sharply under his breath. He had a few pieces that connected to him, but nothing that would directly prove that Eric did it. Eric– was the one— who had killed their best friend in hopes to kill Kyle in the process.
He wasn’t sure how– but– what those prisoners said– what he had heard the night of their lock up. Only he would ever know their cries for freedom while no one else would ever believe they were not the ones who were the cause of this— Mysterion heard. Mysterion heard all their cries and they’d be ones that would leave his scattering brain.
He could feel the pressure of his own mind, the voice inside telling him to beat the ever-loving shit out of Cartman— but Kenny was holding even when the murderous glare said otherwise.
”No one will fucking miss you… you piece of garbage… I could take you fucking out right here and now….“
Even at the risk of his own identity, it would be worth it to save his friends— to bring justice to what was lost that day and the countless nights spent crying.
“That’s the thing. People would miss me. You know who’d miss me? Take a guess.”
Eric didn’t even need to say. Kenny knew as well as he did that he was referring to Kyle. He was so needy when it came to normalcy that he’d accept the company of anyone who reminded him of the past. Eric could only imagine what would happen if something else was taken from him.
“Just think of the heartbreak, losing another thing that could remind him. If you think he’s unhinged now, just wait until another memento is removed from his arsenal.”
He grinned. Part of him would have loved to see that. He’d already reveled in the amount of tears cried, knowing he’d caused them. Eric had been cried on several times, and it had been hard to contain his delight.
Every bit of self-destruction he’d seen in Kyle was worth the mistake. It was almost better than having him killed. All he’d had to do was separate the inseparable to ruin him. Watching the energy drain from his face and seeing the dark circles form under his eyes were just a few examples of what he found amusing.
“You’re suck between a rock and a hard place.”
#x Written in The Scrolls || Text#livingadoubledlife#x Piece of Shit Princess || Kenny McCormick#x The Opportunity to Begin Again || Vlogger verse
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[ Craig ]:
“What do you mean…?”
Craig asked, standing around with his group. Clyde standing to his left with Tweek and Token not far behind him. Seeing as the three were a bit agitated by Eric’s appearance, Craig signaled them to go along without him. While Clyde and Token walked off, Tweek seemed a bit nervous to leave Craig behind but reluctantly followed behind. It wasn’t best to go against what Craig said and if he said he’d be fine— he’d be fine.
Craig rests his arms down into his hoodie, cocking his head to the side.
"So… what did I do…? I didn’t do anything to you of what I recall… only the fact you stole 100 dollars from me and never paid me back…“
Yeah— he still wasn’t going to let that go.
Growling to himself, Eric pointed at Craig, his fury unwavering. He had a bone to pick, and he wasn’t going to just let it go.

“That doesn’t even matter anymore, Craig. It’s been, like...years.”
God, was he really still upset about that? It wasn’t even all his fault. There were three other people who were to blame, and one of them was fucking dead. He’d probably made more than $100 since then.
“No, Craig, I’m talking about how you’re suddenly so interested in Kyle or whatever. What the hell do you think you’re doing?!”
That was his. He had fought hard to get Kyle to at least tolerate him more. He didn’t need Craig ruining that by swooping in like some kind of knight in shining armor. He was so desperate to hold onto relationships that he’d even cling to someone like Eric, who he’d only hated for so long. Was he preying on a weak individual’s emotions? Yes. Did he care? No. He just wanted Kyle under his finger, and he had him.
He didn’t want Craig to take that control from him.
#x Written in The Scrolls || Text#thiefofzaron#x Complaining Thief || Craig Tucker#x The Opportunity to Begin Again || Vlogger verse
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[ Intruder ]:
“I do not have a destination, dear King… I am a– vagabond, for lack of a better term. The wind takes me to my next destination and it has brought me here to your lands…”
Cold seafoam green eyes rest on the Wizard King’s figure as he stood in the vacant room. Even though it appeared as the visitor would do nothing, it was normal for those to feel antsy or fearful of their presence. Who wouldn’t though? In the face of someone they did not know, however, knew fairly well at the same time through countless myths.
They stood motionless, not wanting to scare the king into attacking. If he did– it would only end badly for him. One could not escape or kill Death for they would only return soon after.
“As for your scouts… It is not the fact I evaded— they allowed me through even if they were not aware…”

“You can call it whatever you want. You weren’t officially admitted, yet you’re here.”
The wizard wasn’t fazed. It was pointless to argue with him. No amount of excuses could validate a trespassing.
“It takes bravery to do something like that. What is it you want?”
So long as the intruder wasn’t an accomplice of his enemies, he’d let them speak. If they proved worthy, he might even be willing to provide assistance if needed. He admired those who took risks in the face of punishment.
#x Written in The Scrolls || Text#wxnderingxsoul#x The Door to Heaven or Hell || Thein#x Magic Missile || Stick of Truth (Default) verse
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#x Visions of The Past || Photos#x Pussy Ass High Jew Elf || Kyle Broflovski#x Pissbaby Traitor || Stan Marsh#x The Grand Wizard || Eric Cartman#x Magic Missile || Stick of Truth (Default) verse#x We've Got This || Queue
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Glitter Mix - Submitted by Biscuit
#00002A #582140 #9A2E52 #6C8674 #307352
#x Visions of The Past || Photos#x Not Lame || Musings#x Magic Missile || Stick of Truth (Default) verse#x The Opportunity to Begin Again || Vlogger verse#x We've Got This || Queue
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