wisteriathewise

[wisteriathewise]

Would you like to know how Fairies are born?

The Fairy Queen must prick her finger and let a drop of her Amber Blood fall onto the soil. From this drop, a flower will bloom, and a new Fairy will start her flight.

Once the Fairy Queen has finished blessing the forest, which may take centuries, she finds a suitable place to rest. From her last drop of Blood, a great tree will grow. The next Fairy Queen will be born from this tree.

[wisteriathewise]

Another Soup! What a wondrous occasion, heheh!!

I’ve foraged a bit of wild garlic, and grew some sweet onions, please take what you need! I can cast a Soothe Tummy enchantment on them as well.

I have decided, out of pure spite for @the-gnomish-bastard, that i am going to make my own Stew out of ingredients that DON'T involve killing gods and irreversibly changing the fabric of reality.

I will call it the Soup.

[wisteriathewise]

a dead body cannot consent to being reanimated unless provided by the dead body while moribund

for that reason, necromancy is unethical

[wisteriathewise]

I know of this wizard, heheh! Saku the Lotus Wizard lives on the back of a Giant Tortoise that circles Wizard Island. They’ve been nursing their garden for hundreds of years, I’m ever so jealous of their carefully tended Century Trees…

A wizard that uses a lotus flower for their pondering orb. It’s a very delicate process where you wait for it to fully close, and then you encant the magic to direct what you wish to see in the flower when it reopens. It takes a while, but it’s very accurate, so it’s worth it for gaining knowledge.

So don’t just waste it on googling goblin babes. At least choose a rarer type of monster babe.

[wisteriathewise]

a gnome out merrily picking strawberries, completely oblivious to the hawk which swooped down to carry him off only to be impaled upon his hat

[wisteriathewise]

You can easily magnify this spell with Elixir of Warm Milk! Few have survived this combo. Use it wisely…

I cast Curse of Cozy Warm Bed! You are now my prisoner trapped in the world’s most diabolically comfy and inescapable prison!

[wisteriathewise]

As many of know, Fairy Dust can be used to imbue magic into potions and charms, among lots of other things, but do you know where it comes from?

Fairies sleep in flowers, as may be known to you. That flower’s pollen turns to Fairy Dust! The plant itself may also be imbued with magical properties, heheh!

[wisteriathewise]

My Wizard Grandmother @thorrusmoss turned me into a Cat, but one of those Cats with Thumbs, so it’s actually pretty manageable, heheh.

[wisteriathewise]

But helping you patch him up was how I found my love for Healing, heheh! I do wish I could learned in a less explosive manner, though…

today my apprentice sent me flying through the roof of my tower with a failed whirlwind spell. oh ho ho! he is like a son to me

[wisteriathewise]

I filled my Pondering Orb with dried flower buds! It predicts when my flowers will bloom and lets me know which ones need extra care, heheh.

A wizard that uses a pumpkin for their pondering orb. She foretells a lovely autumn with lots of tasty baked goods!

[wisteriathewise]

IN THE MOMENT YOU FIND YOURSELF BEING GRACED BY THE BEAUTY OF A SHOOTING STAR MAKE SURE TO WISH FOR SOMETHING YOU LONG FOR AND IT WILL COME TRUE. WHEN IT WILL COME TRUE YOU WILL NOT KNOW BUT YOU CAN AMPLIFY THE CHANCES OF IT BEING SOONER BY CREATING A LUCK CHARM WHICH YOU MUST KEEP FLUSH TO THE FLESH ABOVE YOUR HEART. AND DO NOT THINK ABOUT WHAT YOU LONG FOR TOO OFTEN AS A DREAM THEIF WILL WHISK IT FROM YOU

[wisteriathewise]

Adding dried Wisteria buds in a potion or smoke with Dragon’s Breath gives Mind protection! It works in a charm or medallion as well. I would highly recommend if you plan on traveling through the Whispering Woods or IKEA.

what kind of potions and charms can one make with some High Quality Dragon’s Breath?

DRAGON’S BREATH IS MY FAVORITE PLANT IN MY GARDEN AND IS BEAUTIFUL WHEN ROLLED INSIDE OF DRIED ROSEBUDS. GREAT ANXIETY REDUCER WHEN SMOKED BUT EFFECTS DO NOT LAST LONG. BUT WHEN USED IN A PROTECTION CHARM CAN ALSO CALM THE MIND AND BODY AND CAN BE FELT BY THOSE YOU TRUST WHEN NEAR. BRINGS ANXIETY TO THOSE WHO WISH YOU HARM. THORRUS OF THE WILD’S (MY) DRAGON’S BREATH LASTS LONGER COMPARED TO WHAT OTHER WIZARDS MARKET. AND TRUST ME, I HAVE TRIED THEIRS.

[wisteriathewise]

There are many Buttons to be had on the Wizard Internet. Try pushing some of them, friend!

BARTERING AN INK JAR’S WORTH OF HIGH QUALITY DRAGONS BREATH FOR INSTRUCTIONS ON “INTERNET”

[wisteriathewise]

Oh no! Suddenly I have become aware of the oppression of the working class!!

Behold! My newest spell of unmatched brutality and efficiency in murder!

I cast Sixteen Tons!

[wisteriathewise]

The gobs have become aware of their place in Wizard Capitalism. Let the Goblin Class War begin!

My goblins have been singing a weird song lately. Anybody know if this means they’re planning something?

Some people say a goblin’s made outta mud

A poor gob's made outta muscle and mud

Muscle and mud and skin and bones

A mind that's a-weak and a back that's strong

You load 16 tons, what do you get?

Another day older and deeper in debt

Maglubliyet, don't you call me 'cause I can't go

I owe my soul to the Murderous Gnome

I was born one mornin' when the sun didn't shine

I picked up my drill and I climbed down the mine

I loaded 16 tons of Runic Warp Stone

And the gnome boss said, "Well, a-curse my soul"

You load 16 tons, what do you get?

Another day older and deeper in debt

Maglubliyet, don't you call me 'cause I can't go

I owe my soul to the Murderous Gnome

I was born one mornin', it was drizzlin' rain

Fightin' and shankin’ are my middle name

I was raised in the canebrake by an ol' bird thing lion

Can't no high toned wizard make me walk the line

You load 16 tons, what do you get?

Another day older and deeper in debt

Maglubliyet, don't you call me 'cause I can't go

I owe my soul to the Murderous Gnome

If you see me comin', better step aside

A lotta gobs didn't, a lotta gobs died

One fist of copper, the other of steel

If the right one don't get you

Then the left one will

You load 16 tons, what do you get?

Another day older and deeper in debt

Maglubliyet, don't you call me 'cause I can't go

I owe my soul to the Murderous Gnome

[wisteriathewise]

Your twitchy and unsteady hands are NOT from an excessive consumption of sugar and caffiene. You come from a bloodline that traces back to mighty sorcerers, your nerves are less suited for activities like surgery and more for the swift and sporadic movements needed to cast spells.

[wisteriathewise]

Let’s have some wisteria bloom tea to go with it!

i have re-turned from an expedition into the great forest. would any of you like some great forest cheese-cake. it is made of forest cheese. it is also enchanted, i think.