whiskerless-lamp2

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calling in to work sick with a “weird dream”

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a few minutes ago, at exactly midnight, i heard soft distant honking and looked out the cracked window to see a group of trumpeter swans flying low over the fields, huge and white and unearthly, their shadows flung crisp-black onto glittering snow by the moonlight, and then they were gone and a moment later their voices were gone too and in the wake of them was a sort of loneliness that is hard to quite get words around

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GIRL NO YOU’RE MOURNING SOMETHING THAT HASN’T EVEN HAPPENED YET AGAIN!!!!!!

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on the sixth day god created white tank top with no bra and he saw that it was good

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was having a minor crisis but this appeared in my head and it was so stupid it just snapped me right out of it

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hey bro can i ask you a question that will reveal a deep and fundamental gap in my knowledge of the world

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Do you guys think If i hit an arbitrary goal i will finally unlock unlimited happiness?

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do you think people in the hannibal universe were intimidated out of serial killing by how much thought and care was put into all of the big serial killer's serial killing. like yeah man i'd loveee to get into serial killing but i don't have access to the facilities where i can flay someone alive and make roses with their skin unfortunately :/ also i have a day job :/ if i was a serial killer in the hannibal universe i'd get imposter syndrome while reading articles about other killers like fuckkkkkkk man he sewed them together in a grain silo to look like a giant fucking gradient when viewed from above. why do i even try this shit. and i'd cry myself to sleep every night

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OOHHH FUUBLBLBLBLB

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I want to be an evil wizard. but I keep choosing kindness

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do you think the elevator has a favorite floor

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I've been real busy lately because it's December and I work at the post office, so of course I am

But that doesn't mean I can't show up with an unprompted PSA

Hey! Have you ever mailed a letter to Santa Claus? Have you ever wondered what exactly happened to that letter? Well wonder no longer! If it had a stamp and a return address, then odds are that it ended up on the USPS's Operation Santa page!

Every year, the USPS collects letters to Santa Claus, and processes them to black out any identifying information. Last names, addresses, things like that. Then, the letters are posted on the Operation Santa webpage and people can adopt the letters.

Once you adopt a letter, you can buy gifts for them, wrap them up, and package them. Then you get a barcode from the website, and bring them to a post office. The clerk there will scan the barcode, which prints out a label with the address on it, and sends out the gift.

It's anonymous on both ends, and is generally just. A really nice thing to do.

I highly recommend it if you have some money to spare this year and want to give a kid a moment of magic this year

It's one of those things that the post office just happened to be positioned to do, and ended up knocking it out of the park. Unfortunately, I don't think they advertise this nearly well enough, and most letters end up going unanswered

Hopefully, a few more will be answered this year

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My 15 year old brother is currently obsessed with uranium glass for some reason so today my day has consisted of walking into antique stores and asking them if they currently have any 1930s glassware anyway we struck gold at this place