whelmedchaos

[whelmedchaos]

Tim: I can’t tell dick?? I don’t want him to think I’m crazy or not trustworthy bc I’m doing something reckless??!

Jason who saw Dick make out with a mark to steal something from his pocket when Dick was 17:…

Bruce who saw Dick jump off a moving plane and hum the song “I need a hero” instead of calling for Superman:

Wally who say Dick go fuck it and infiltrate a sex trafficking ring as a stripper bc someone said he was too pretty to work for the mob:

Roy who has smacked dick out of delusions 15 times too many:

Clark who saw dick stay in a radioactive city for vibes:

Diana who has heard Donna’s concerned ramblings since she was like 12:

Damian who saw that Dick turned the bat ears into projectiles that can electrocute you:

Steph who saw the same thing:

Tim who refuses to believe Dick Grayson can do anything that isn’t brilliant, premeditated and completely the best option: I CANT HE’ll be so disappointed:(

[whelmedchaos]

thinking about creatures.

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Kid!Tim, called to the principles office. Waiting for an adult to come get him.

Dick, storming in: WHAT HAPPENED.

Principal: as you can see Timothy has engaged in-

Dick: SHUT THE FUCK UP. Now Timtam what’s wrong? Are you alright? Do you need a hug? It’s alright.

Tim, pulled the fire alarm because he wanted the last chocolate muffin in the cafeteria but they aren’t allowed seconds: I- I just though I saw a fire. I was trying *hiccup* I was trying to do the right thing. I’m so sorry.

Principal: Mr. Grayson. We have security footage that Timothy pulled the alarm completely purposefully-

Dick: Can’t you see he’s never done anything wrong in his life?

[whelmedchaos]

i can and will make him worse <33

the audacity of the official dc account to even post this 😭

[whelmedchaos]

Considering how much Jason didn't care about anyone but Bruce during his revenge rampage, and how ridiculous everything was before he eventually came back to the family, it probably took him a stupid long time to realize he wasn't the second oldest child

---

Jason: ...And as the second oldest- Tim: Third oldest. Jason: Huh? Tim: Cass is, like, seven months older than you? Jason: Jason: SINCE WHEN??

[whelmedchaos]

Affirmations:

-I am fine

-I am calm

-I am not overcaffeinated

-I am capable

-I am not panicking

-I do not create my own problems

-I do not manufacture my own stress

-I am not panicking

-I can make it through this

-Everything will turn out

-I am not panicking

-I am not panicking

-I am not panicking

-I am not panicking

-I am not panicking

-I am not panicking

-I am not panicking

-I am not panicki

[whelmedchaos]

So what if Tim won Jason and Damien over with affection?

* Tim hugs his feral robin shape brother and said feral brother shape pretends not to like hugs they get but do demand more

I might be the incorrect everything blog but even this is out of character for me. What you're describing is fanon Dick Grayson. Keep in mind Tim is a weirdo who commits white-collar crimes with his equally freaky friends when no one's looking. If anything, he would win Jason and Damian's respect by minding his business and letting his skills speak for him.

Like while Damian's trying to get Bruce to up his allowance to upgrade his and Jon's Fortress of Attitude, Tim would casually launder money from a foreign country and put it in an anonymous envelope as Damian's birthday gift.

Or while Jason's trying to infiltrate Black Mask's operation, Tim bribes his way up the food chain or blackmails the ones who can't be paid off—acquiring the blackmail, of course, through a series of computer viruses designed to harvest people's information.

Because the way this dysfunctional family works, respect for abilities is a prerequisite for affection, and thus using said abilities to help each other becomes a love language.

Tim hugging his brothers and them pretending not to like it? Nah. It's more like Tim giving his brothers a crucial piece of intel and they have to pretend they didn't need him to find it when they really do.

[whelmedchaos]

I need Dick to be completely delusional about Tim and consider him to be his nicest, most helpful, and most well-behaved sibling.

_____

Tim: I have never done anything wrong, ever, in my life.

Dick: I know this and I love you 🥰

Jason: ...Dick, are you fucking HIGH???

_____

Dick: You should consider trying to be more like Tim! He's always such a well-behaved angel ❤️

Tim: Thank you, Dick 😇

Damian:

________

Dick: Tim is very kind and always so polite! He would never be mean to someone on purpose! ❤️

Bruce, who is bullied by Tim an average of 4.5 times a day:

______

Dick: Tim is an absolute sweetheart!

Cass: ... I do not think that word means what you think it does.

_____

Duke, staring at a warehouse that he and Tim just 'accidentally' blew up: ... So how mad do you think Dick is going to be at us?

Tim: Don't worry, I got this.

Dick, landing next to them: Holy explosion, Red Robin! What happened here?!?

Tim: I don't know 😔. It was like this when we got here 🥺.

Duke, whispering: There is no way he's going to believe tha-

Dick: Oh no! Well, I'm just glad you two are safe!

Duke: ... Tim, I need you to teach me your ways.

Dick: hm? Did you say something, Duke?

________

Dick: I don't get it! Why does everyone think Tim is some kind of crazed feral gremlin?!?

Alfred: I believe that is because they have in fact met Master Tim.

Dick: What was that? 🙃

Alfred: ... 😮‍💨 Truly it is a mystery for the ages.

[whelmedchaos]

Dick is for the eldest sibling while Tim is for the parentified children and I think that's the most important difference between them

[whelmedchaos]

i was supposed to go to bed an hour ago dont tell my mom

[whelmedchaos]

almost forgot to post him lol yo boy is flexible

[whelmedchaos]

Bruce, to his kids: Did none of you think this was a bad idea?!

Dick: Oh no, we all did. We just decided to do it anyway.

[whelmedchaos]

hot take: i feel like sowing is much better than reaping

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Where's that tweet about people still living long fulfilling lives even through the fall of the roman empire because I think about it constantly

[whelmedchaos]

Where's that tweet about people still living long fulfilling lives even through the fall of the roman empire because I think about it constantly

[whelmedchaos]

If you voted trump unfollow me

[whelmedchaos]

i love all the predictions like "lol we're gonna find out through supernatural XD" and i wake up and TURNS OUT we're finding out because all my mutuals are reblogging and posting variations of "queer ppl do not kill yourself" which. jesus ok.