whatsacrush

[whatsacrush]

For Valentines day I redrew this comic of things people have actually said to me

[whatsacrush]

Never Been in Love by Will Jay, Everything I Need by Malinda, hopeless, a romantic by Grace Wolfe, don’t by grace Wolfe, Cure for Me by Aurora

I'm making an aroace playlist on Spotify, what songs should I add?

[whatsacrush]

“you support gay rights so you must be gay”

i support animal rights do i look like a fucking alpaca to you

[whatsacrush]

[whatsacrush]

reblog if you think aros and aces (or anyone on the aroace spectrum) are queer

trying to prove something to my mother ^^

[whatsacrush]

What steps can i take to heal from amatonormativity and help others do the same (especially if they dont know anything about amatonormativity?)

Great question! Here some steps that I think could really make a difference in healin from amatonormativity.

Know what it is!

Amatonormativity - Amatonormativity is the assumption that all human beings pursue love or romance, especially by means of a monogamous long-term relationship.

2. Surround yourself with aros!

Be intentional bout this too, don’t just find community with one type of aro identity. Find non sam aros, aroaces, aroallos, oriented aroaces, etc. Make sure you don’t exclusively stay in aro spaces, though, cause it gon get real echo chamber-y real fast if you don’t. A diverse but aro focused lense when findin community always do the trick. This way, you can get a variety of opinions and takes about amatonormativity.

3. Read, watch, listen! Ask yourself, “Do I just know or do I deeply understand what amatonormativity is?” Readin, watchin, and listenin bout amatonormativity can help deepen your knowledge on how amatonormativity impacts ourselves, the community (aro and aspec), and society. @simbistardis has a list of black centered aro texts for yall to read!

Some videos!

Amatonormativity in the general sense

Friends with benefits

How bein single is seen throughout society

QPRs!

Bein Aroallo!

How society talk bout romance

4. Reflect in your own life

So now that you a little more about amatonormativity and how it be impactin people, think bout how you might strugglin with amatonormativity yourself. Don’t blame no one group of people because even you, yes you, can perpetuate amatonormativity even if you think you got it all down. Start journalin about how you see your personal relationships, about what makes you uncomfortable romance wise, how your aro-ness might tie into anythin else (Like bein black, as is the main focus of intersectionality for this blog, but whatever else is good too.) Think past just online media or shippin or fandom and really tip into real life experience. Think bout what you may fear because of your aro identity, or what you look forward to because of your aro identity. If you not aro, think bout why you may want a romantic relationship and you really like bout it, slowly dismantle the notion that wantin a romantic relationship is the universal. Take your time, healin don’t happen over night.

Hope this was helpful, thanks for the question!

[whatsacrush]

conversations of amatonormativity and consent overlap a lot and should be discussed side by side more frequently. because when you live in a society that teaches you that you’re supposed to want sex and romance, that you may want to say no in the moment but you shouldn’t say no forever, any statements about consent get muddied. you cannot at once preach that consent is vital and “you can always say no” and also insist that people should give sex and romance a try, even when they express disinterest, telling them “eventually you’ll find the right person.”

[whatsacrush]

honestly FUCK relationship hierarchy

[whatsacrush]

Meee but with fanfic

Happy Aro Week!!! 💚🤍🩶🖤

Have this meme I made bc I REFUSE to believe that this is just me sksk—

[whatsacrush]

the other day someone asked me what gender i was attracted to and i said neither and they said "so in LGBTQ+ ur the minus" and i know that it could be kinda offensive but i just find it really funny. like yeah im the minus lmao.

.

[whatsacrush]

Wearing my aro and ace rings to class today >:]

[whatsacrush]

[whatsacrush]

"have some shame, you don't even have a boyfriend, even the loser and nerds do these days-"

i hope you give birth to a centipede and you have to spend the rest of your days slaving away to buy shoes for it.

[whatsacrush]

“The LBGTQIA+ community is a cult!” Look, even if it was; I would rather be in the “love everyone, accept each other, do what you want to do if it makes you happy cult” then the “do one thing wrong, and you're going to burn for all eternity, things you can't control are your fault” cult.

[whatsacrush]

In regards of the Trump government scraping all trans inclusion in its queer information portion of its websites I have made this thing. Spread the word. Don't let them pretend we never existed.

P.S: Don't like! Reblog! <3

EDIT: Well this got a lot of attention! I got a few users asking to print or repost my art and I am unimaginably grateful to everyone's interest, especially since it's a really simple drawing I made on a whim haha! Anyone who is looking to print these out to hang or hand out or repost on another platform is free to do so, although I ask you to credit me and let people know it's from my Tumblr profile! If anyone wishes to do anything else with my art or post and wants to clarify what I consent to then they can message me privately and I'll explain! <333 all my love to my queer siblings

EDIT: I made an LGBTQIA+ version with a focus on trans and intersex folks, it's on my pinned if you prefer this version of the acronym.

[whatsacrush]

Celebrating Valentine’s Day by knitting aro green socks for my mom (a hater) and completely forgetting that love even exists. Life is good.

[whatsacrush]

You don't have to want to date. You don't have to be interested in dating. You don't have to like dating. Romance and romantic relationships are optional.