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we-rate-muppets · 5 years
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#2 Mr. Bimbo
[Image description Fozzie Bear playing Squire Trelawney, and holdimg up his left index finger, Mr. Bimbo, Fozzie is wearing a curly blonde wig, a white old fashioned suit and a white tricorn hat with gold embellishments and a large salmon pink feather]
Fozzie Bear is always a delight but his role as Squire Telawney and by extension Mr. Bimbo truely is something else. He plays an integral role to the movie Muppets Treasure Island and an even more integral role in confirming that Fozzie Bear is indeed a himbo. Unluckily in '96 the exact nomenclature for a stupid but attractive man did not exist. And I must preface the followint that I myself am not attracted to Fozzie Bear as he is a bear who is made of shag carpeting*, but I believe that Fozzie Bear does meet all the criteria of a himbo. My evidence is as follows
Fozzie Bear is seen as attractive cannonicly to enough gay men that he feels the need to adress this fact in The Muppets (2015) by saying "When your online profile says passionate bear looking for love, you get a lot of wring responses. Well not wrong just wrong for me." This implies that Fozzie Bear does infact get "a lot" of responses on his online dating profile. So by some unknown standards he is attractive.
Fozzie Bear is dumb this is so indisputable that I will not waste time arguing it, however the character of Mr. Bimbo that lives in the left index finger of Fozzie Bear's character Squire Trelawney in Muppet Treasure Island is described as smart. So smart that he has been to the moon, twice, in the 1800s. Mr. Bimbo is the brains of the operation. Brains of questionable reality as it remains unclear wether or not Mr. Bimbo actually exists in the left index finger of Squire Trelawney or if Mr. Bimbo is simply a figment his imagination.
Fozzie Bear is kind, he is the moral compass of the main muppets. He may be stupid but he cares deeply about his friends. Mr. Bimbo shows no such kindness during the climactic scene of Muppets Treasure Island Mr. Bimbo defends Trelawney with his amazing sword fighting abilities, but what were his motives here? To save a friend? Or to simply protect the creature that he lives in the left index finger of? It is unclear and given that we do not know anything about Mr. Bimbo from the source himself we can not be sure.
Given that the criteria for a Himbo are
Attractive, stupid, and good of heart
We can say without question that Fozzie Bear, who plays Squire Trelawney, the vessel of Mr. Bimbo in Muppet Treasure Island, is a himbo.
But.
Mr. Bimbo as a smart manipulator with adept skill in the sciences and swordfighting with nebulous morality. So we, sadly cannot say that Mr. Bimbo is a himbo. Being a himbo does not influence my rating of the character however.
Rating: 4/10 we just don't know.
Actor: Fozzie Bear
Puppeteer: Kevin Clash
*Fozzie Bear is not made of shag carpeting.
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we-rate-muppets · 5 years
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The Muppets Christmas Carol is not available on any streaming service I have access to and that is homophobic
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we-rate-muppets · 5 years
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#1 Screaming Thing
This muppet is the height of all things good sbout the world. Screeming thing makes their debut singing the song 'windmills of your mind' at a rapidly increasing tempo and they only appear in one veterins hospital and as a part of the wide finale shot in the muppet movie. Screaming Thing has three left feet and all of my heart.
Rating:100000/10 this is the peak of muppetry
Puppeteer: Jerry Nelson
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