washingtonsrevolution

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Timelines: Hamilton v. History

Aka starter for why Hamilton is Very Very historically inaccurate

Hamilton is pretty vague about dates (especially in the second act) but I did my best lol. For the history side, I just covered the events that happened in the musical. Also, things aren’t necessarily in chronological order within the history boxes. There was a lot of simultaneous shit happening, and I kinda just Listed what happened in that year.

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I just realized I haven’t told you guys about how 3rd President of the United States Thomas Jefferson haunts my dorm room.

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remember that time irl when Tallmadge’s mission was thwarted by the weather and George Washington actually sent him a letter like “Hey buddy, it’s alright, you tried your best, I’m sure that if not for that storm you would’ve done an amazing job youre good i’m not mad at you at all” ( very exact quote right there of course )

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genres are OUTDATED. i sort my music by thottiness, jammability, rebelliousness, theatricality, and depression.

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Washington: I’m General George Washington

Washington, gesturing to Abe, Abigail, Anna, Caleb, and Robert: These are my spies.

Washington: My show is going to be called TURN: Washington’s Spies, it’s ab

Ben: *coughs a little bit*

Washington: uGH. *briefly flicks hand at Ben* and this is my Major Tallmadge.

Washington: He isn’t in the title.

Ben: :(

Washington: The show is going to be called TURN: Washington’s Spies, because it’s about my spies, and

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‪Essays I've written that had absolutely no business scoring as high as they did‬

- A literary analysis claiming that Jekyll was gay and strongly insinuating that Hyde was his drag persona‬ ‪- 500 words on how Despacito has changed the American music industry (in Spanish)‬ ‪- Literally didn’t even write an essay just turned in a picture of that scene in Monty Python and the Holy Grail where the cartoon angels are playing the trumpet w their asses - We were supposed to make a ‘diary’ from the pov of a character in Romeo and Juliet. I chose to write as a gay servant who was hopelessly in love w Romeo and plotting to murder Juliet. It’s entirely handwritten w my left hand and stg every single word is spelled wrong. One page just says ‘today I saw a geese’. There are no fewer than 6 thinly veiled sexual innuendos.

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True crime podcast: Police say the suspect not only murdered his victims, but dismembered and ate their body parts piece by piece. I guess they had never heard of Blue Apron. Blue Apron provides dozens of delicious meals for

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John Lennon writing to Paul McCartney 1971

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god George Washington is so sexc

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americans think ABSOLUTELY NOTHIN of driving 7 hours. they’ll drive 7 hours just for dinner. they’ll drive 7 hours just for chips and dip

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Ben Tallmadge

Turn: Epiphany

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Founding Father Facts - Thomas Jefferson

Jefferson believed that no less than two hours a day should be spent exercising, regardless of the weather. He believed the rainier and colder the better.

Which is a little strange, considering he thought France was cold in July and always kept a fire burning.

Jefferson did indeed suffer a migraine after a failed attempt to woo a crush. He would continue to suffer migraines throughout his life after stressful social situations

Music was a big part of Jefferson’s life. He especially enjoyed playing the violin.

Jefferson didn’t function for months after his wife died. He would take his daughter, Patsy, out riding with him for hours.

Having the Declaration of Independence edited by a large group was torture for Jefferson. He took each change personally.

Jefferson once said that sex was “the strongest of the human passions.”

Jefferson thought sheepdogs “the most careful intelligent dogs in the world” and brought back a pregnant Briard from France.

Jefferson loved horses, but not one with strong personalities. He liked to have control. He also liked to ride fast. When riding in a carriage, he would often take the reins from his driver so he could go faster.

Jefferson liked quiet but not silence. He would often hum or sing to himself. He kept pet mockingbirds and would let them fly around his room at Monticello or his office at the White House.

Madison and Jefferson were described as: being closer than brothers, having no restraint with each other, and as Jefferson loving Madison more than a father could love a son.

An anonymous person once wrote of Jefferson: “I think you ought to get a damn kicking, you red-headed son of a bitch. You are a pretty fellow to be President of the United States of America, you dirty scoundrel.”

Jefferson hated the formality of Washingon and Adams’ presidency and would thus host dinners where everyone could sit where they pleased and forbade tedious toasts to each other’s health.

Many visitors made comments about Jefferson’s old slippers that he wore whenever he pleased.

Jefferson was a huge nature lover and very interested in science. He had skins and bones sent to him and had collections at Monticello and the White House.

Meriwether Lewis was Jefferson’s secretary during his early presidency.

Like Madison, Jefferson always read before bed and didn’t sleep much.

In the winter, Jefferson liked to spend evenings with his grandchildren and teach them silly games.

One of Sally Hemings’ sons was named Madison. (Jefferson was likely the father).

Because of his tutor, Jefferson spoke French with a Scottish accent and worked hard to lose it.

As a young adult, Jefferson hated returning home from college and having to put up with his mother’s parties. He would often shut himself away in his room and write letters to his friends.

He was addicted to buying books, but he was very picky about the edition, types of paper and binding.

Jefferson smuggled contraband rice out of Italy to grow in Virginia.

Because he was always cold, Jefferson preferred to dress for comfort, especially while working long days in the drafty White House.

Sources: Thomas Jefferson: The Art of Power by Jon Meacham / Thomas Jefferson: A Life by Willard Sterne Randall

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TURN but filmed like a reality show?

Ben falls in the Delaware and it immediately cuts to him in interview going “I can swim, but,” Caleb “On the outside?” and there’s silent footage of him calmly setting up a camp, taking care of Ben. “On the inside?” the same footage but you can hear him roasting Ben, a voiceover that’s just a bunch of frantic beeps. Cut back to the interview “That bastard just wanted a cuddle. There’s easier ways. Coulda just asked.”

Abe: “Ben wants me to spy. Don’t worry I’m not gonna do it” Cut to Anna in interview, “I’m thinking: Is he Stupid? Is he Crazy????” Cut to Abe, “Yeah so *coughs* that’s how I became a spy…”

After the “not my son” it cuts to interview and Ben doesn’t say anything he just kind of takes a deep breath and blinks a lot, looks away.

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General George Washington and Ben Tallmadge

Turn: Mr. Culpeper

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Thomas Jefferson, in reference to John Adams: “I used to hate him hate him hate him, hate him. I studied him, to figure out why I hated him so much. But that blossomed into a very real friendship, as these things often do.”