voookster

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the shuakening

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temptation

i lowkey have too many notes to write down properly KDFHKDS but ill write them down for Future Cele so i can read it later and be like omggg past cele ur so fun and interesting

in general, the more "color" the scenes have, the closer it is to "real life" as opposed to the muted/hushed winter blues of maruki's reality

i.e. the dark frames w akira smiling and the very last panel are when reality sinks in: first for akira, then for goro

by the way this is long winter au but sumire is still brainwashed. this also works for canonverse but i just had long winter au in mind:o

youve heard of laundry and taxes now get ready for coffee and pastries

in every panel, akira is smiling! :) and goro is very much not smiling.

intentionally his face is hidden in the last 2 pages so its unclear whether it's the "ideal reality" already (akira/goro's daydreams/wants/desires), or if goro is still fighting akira on making sure he picks the right choice

the smoke from the first page kinda leads into the 3rd page omfg COMPLETELY UNINTENTIONAL BUT REALLY COOL LMAOOO

that's nameless and belladonna in jazz jin!!! i love them. I LOVETHEM. i miss them so bad is it obvious

the cafe is loosely based off of caffe strada @ uc berkeley LMAO. my parents used to take me there a lot as a little kid so that's the first cafe i think of when i imagine one. its like right on the streetside, basically on the sidewalk, so its very bustling and people are always walking by... probably a little disconcerting to see everyones summery bright smiles despite the bitter cold and snow

in long winter AU, the Ideal Reality starts before 1/1 so yeah they get to see the new years fireworks together (or something)

also intentional that they wear the same winter outfits in the whole comic although it Probably does not take place at the same time. in maruki's snowglobe, time seems frozen in place... but akira and goro are both acutely aware that the sands are running thru QUICK

goro's frustrated expression on page 3 is one also of disdain: "don't speak FOR me you fucking imbecile" type of expression.

goro, who's never lived a normal life and therefore doesn't know much abt "normalcy" nor really actively seeks it. this 3rd semester is basically purgatory for him and he doesn't care to try and go through the motions the way akira does. akira what do YOU know about the type of "normalcy" i deserve? how do YOU know if i "deserve" that?

im thinking that this is a naive akira who is mostly set on taking the deal because he feels hopeless... seeing all his friends with good happy lives while goro and himself are alive and miserable and shouldering the weight of the world during the horror of long winter......

oh but if he takes the deal they could all be good and alive and happy!!!.... and goro knows this. i feel like in any other universe (i.e. akira is 100% certain on not taking the deal and goro knows this) then goro would be happy and carefree to do these little indulgences for himself and akira's sake, to just enjoy the snowglobe world while it exists.

but this goro is discontent. he sees how akira is enjoying the snowglobe and knows maruki is depending on this. goro has to be the one to remind akira that none of this is his to keep........ in this fucked up world, routine is dangerous. becoming comfortable is dangerous. they cannot keep any of this.

on that note, goro says "i hate you" in a halfhearted sort of way (it's not true and akira knows that.) but he's trying to think of a way that he can dissuade akira from picking the wrong choice.....

and i think the thing is, goro thinks all of this, but he still falls into the rhythm of routine with akira anyway. in a way, goro feels hopeless too.

all of this is maruki's doing........ paralyzed by the inability to choose... whatever you do, you lose. goro needs to hold akira at arm's length so the stupid sentimental fool doesn't get too attached and falls into the wrong universe. akira needs to make a concentrated effort to detach himself from goro even though he wants the simplest thing in the world: just one more unremarkable day with him. it's lose-lose..........,

also i liked drawing the tentacles in the last pic the freaking blue lines on them were SO satisfying to draw

edit: also the last page: the blood flooding the panel….. the idea of the ideal world being built off of the blood and sweat and tears and bodies of the people who could have been. of those lost in the actualization, of those destroyed, of those stitched together and brought back to life. all just for a little false happiness. goro sees it but akira doesn’t, and it’s a grim sight.

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new graphic novel means more taako (+lup) edits!

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TEN days left until TAZGN6: The Suffering Game is out in bookstores everywhere!!!! there's still time to preorder a signed copy! and all preorder receipts can snag a preorder gift (US/Can)!

having a great time at the chug 'n' squeeze

[voookster]

"there's something about the dying that feels familiar" is the most implication-dense line in all of TAZ. it explains nothing, but it says everything. the sheer existentialism of it all! of having déjà vu, about dying in a time loop! you didn't think you were in a time loop before the one today — but how sure about that can you be, knowing deep down that you've died before? now who's to say the time loop you know is the only one you need to escape from? you can stop this hour from resetting if you try, but what about the year? what about the last ten years?

"there's something about the dying that feels familiar" is a comforting thing to be told. because if it's happened once before, then this time, too, you could come back. but "there's something about the dying that feels familiar" is also a terrifying thing to be told. your reality has nested layers, and you can't even see all of them. you can only try to escape the single one that you can — and hope you've changed enough, learned enough, to finally break out of the rest when their times come, too.

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one of the lines in balance that always gets me isn’t even a character line. it’s not some badass or heartbreaking moment between characters or anything.

it’s griffin’s “how could you forget about lup?”

because he says it with this sort of incredulous laugh. and at first it’s like “oh yeah, haha, how could you?” because it’s lup. she’s your other half. your twin sister, your best friend, the other part of your soul. you know yourself through her. of course you wouldn’t forget her!

but you already have. and slowly, the dread sets in, because you have, and now you’re remembering, and there’s a kind of rage that comes with it.

how could you forget about lup?

[voookster]

I love how you can hear the exact moment that Justin figures out who Taako is. He's trying to do the "Taako's an idiot" thing at the beginning of Rockport and you can tell it's not working for him. Then in that first interaction with Graham, he refers to himself as "Taako from TV" for the first time. His voice deepens just a bit and he calls Graham "my man" and it's like, yep, there he is. There's America's Favorite Wizard.

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"you're going to be amazing"

ISTUS WIP

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zoning so hard these past couple weeks

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Eye simply am not well

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finally got around to listening to the adventure zone and OH MY GOD i have been missing out

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oh my god it’s taako!! from tv!!!