volatilesubstances

[volatilesubstances]

A couple job interview hacks from someone who has to give a job interview every single goddamn day: (disclaimer: this goes for my process and my company’s process, other companies and industries might be different)

1. There are a few things I check and a few questions I ask literally just to figure out if you can play the game and get along with others in a professional setting. Part of the job I interview for is talking to people, and we work in teams. So if you can’t “play the game” a tiny bit, it’s not going to work. Playing the game includes:

- Why do you want to work here? (just prove that you googled the company, tell me like 1 thing about us, I just want to know that you did SOME kind of preparation for this interview)

- Are you wearing professional clothing? I don’t need a suit just don’t show up in a ratty t-shirt and sweatpants.

- Are you able to speak respectfully and without dropping f-bombs all the time? Not because I’m offended but because I don’t want to be reported to HR if you wind up on my team.

- Can you follow simple directions in an interview?

2. Stop telling me protected information. I don’t want to know about what drugs or medications you’re on, I don’t want to know about you being sick, I don’t want to know if you’re planning to have children soon, I don’t want to know anything about your personal life other than “can you do the job?” 

3. When we ask, “What questions do you have for me?” here are my favorites I’ve heard: - What does the day-to-day look like for a member of your team?

- If one of your team members was not performing up to his usual standard, what steps would you take to correct that?

- What can I start doing now to accelerate my learning process in this job?

- What are some reservations you have about me as a candidate? (be ready for this emotionally….it will REALLY help you in the future, and I’ve had people save themselves from a No after this, but can be hard to hear)

- In your opinion, what skills and qualities does the ideal candidate for this job possess?

- What advice would you give to a new hire in this position/someone who wanted to break into this industry, as someone who has worked here for a while?

Those are just my tips off-the-cuff. I work in sales in marketing/SAAS, so these can be very different depending on the industry, but I wish the people I interview could read this before they show up. 

[volatilesubstances]

reblog if you wear glasses. too many mutuals don't know they have glasses wearers in their midsts

[volatilesubstances]

you don’t gotta tell me to boycott the Nintendo prices by not buying bc i don’t have the money to get them anyways

[volatilesubstances]

i think it is so diabolical and sick and twisted that mia came from a family of spirit mediums and was a skilled medium herself but neither of the two most important people she lost actually died so she couldn't even channel them. do you think she ever wished misty and diego were actually dead just so she could know for sure and then hated herself for even thinking about it.

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[volatilesubstances]

Haven't got my glasses on and thought someone's pfp was the twin towers falling with a bisexual flag in the background. I didn't even question it just went 'damn that goes hard' before I realised it was, in fact, a penguin

[volatilesubstances]

the joke was funnier in my head ngl

[volatilesubstances]

The reading comprehension and overall common sense on this website is piss poor.

[volatilesubstances]

[volatilesubstances]

yeah Fran, learn to appreciate using fountain pens in 2012 like your brother, a normal well-adjusted adult

[volatilesubstances]

What's the main ingredient for guacamole?

[volatilesubstances]

I can never leave Tumblr because after years of sporadic therapy utterly failed to even approach the core of my problem some random tumblr user was like “I processed my trauma by writing a 10,000 word work of filthy fanfic erotica” and I was like “fuck it I’ve tried everything else” and now I’m 17 chapters and 20,000 words deep into an unpublishable work of obscenity and after careful literary analysis with one of the Beloved Mutuals I have come to some Terrible Revelations about my childhood and may now continue the process of Healing. Where else am I supposed to get this kind of experience. Who does this. Why are we like this. I’m never leaving. I love y’all.

[volatilesubstances]

[volatilesubstances]

How old were you at the lowest point in your life? Reblog this and put it in the tags, plus your current age maybe. I'm trying to see something.

[volatilesubstances]

gagging you with our red string of fate to shut you up for one fucking second