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The genres of TMA episodes:

-some dude I know is acting weird

-some dude I don’t know is acting weird

-help I got trapped in a place and it won’t let me out

-meat

-alternatively, worms

-this episode has actual plot in it but you won’t realize until twenty episodes later

-I am straight up a supernatural entity giving this interview

-something happened and I cannot prove it happened

-I am literally confessing to murder

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random headcanons

butters is a trans woman and uses the name margie!! she’s out to a few people but still closeted to her parents. although she’s chosen a new name she doesn’t mind being called butters

heidi is a giant lesbian, so is nelly

kenny has freckles everywhere! it’s especially prominent on his shoulders in the summer. he’s also really pale due to usually not taking off his parka.

another kenny one: he’s! short! he’s the shortest boy of the main 5 (incl. butters), followed closely by stan

clyde, however, is the shortest boy out of all of them 

heidi is still chubby!!! she’s got chubby cheeks and a tummy. she isn’t “fat” though

tweek has tourrette’s syndrome, he was diagnosed in his preteens and he’s been getting better at controlling his tics

stan is entirely and 100% bros with at least most of the girls, he hangs out and plays board games with them!

wendy and tweek are very very close friends, if not besties! 

tweek has been taking piano lessons for about 5 years, it’s his favourite thing in the world and takes his mind off of all the anxiety 

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Got curious about if scallops have brains and

Pretty sure this article was written by a scallop 🤔

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Hello Slug. You interrupted a very nice gay moment with your homophobia and disgusted facial expressions. So let's play a game, why don't we?

In front of you is a camera and a tv screen, which is set to play a few of television's best gay and lesbian romance scenes. The camera will be tracking your facial expressions. If you make a disgusted face that lasts longer than the scene itself, well, let's say you're attitude won't be the only thing that's salty.

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leitner of the spiral thats a book you read in elementary school with a wild and completely unforgettable plot but every time you try and explain it to anyone they think youre just making it up. you know you arent. you remember just enough of the title to try and google it but nothing you can find online is anywhere close.

elementary book gaslights you (asmr)

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cats of the apocalypse mood board

(Click images for better quality)

[IMAGE ID: the image is a mood board of fifteen total square images organized into five rows of three. Each image has a different cat with the fear alignment written in the image, and each cat is in a pose that has a wholesome, tongue in cheek similarity to that fear. Going in order from left to right, then top to bottom the images are as followed. The Slaughter, a white cat is play biting a human shin. The Flesh, a brown cat is wearing a pink bunny ear hood. The Hunt, a white cat is mid air, pouncing on a human in bed. The Buried, a grey tabby is laying on a pile of dirt on its back, with dirt covering just its stomach. The Desolation, a brown tabby is pawing at a lit candle glass to knock it off the table. The Web, a calico kitten is being held by a human, it has no text but the image is from the Buttersquash is a master of psychological manipulation meme. The Stranger, a grey tabby has a post-it note stuck to its nose with a cat nose and mouth drawn on it. The End, a grey tabby is asleep in a cat bed designed with teeth to look like a cartoony monster's open mouth. The Eye, a black cat is looking straight up at the viewer and is so dark that its only visible features are its blue-green eyes. The Lonely, a wooden ledge covered lightly in snow has two cat paw prints. The Vast, a yellow cat is lounging precariously on a roof antenna while looking down at the viewer. The Corruption, a blue butterfly is landing on a tuxedo cat's up turned nose. The Spiral, a human hand has fingertip cover toys of four tuxedo cat paws and one tuxedo cat head. The Dark, a white cat in a dark room is illuminated by a small lamp at its feet which casts a large shadow. The Extinction, an i-cat music player toy from the aughts is pictured, it resembles a white robotic cat.

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things that exist in the same universe and at the same time

The Magnus Archives

Gravity Falls

Welcome to Night Vale

now, you might be asking: cameron, sir camelot, camalama. why do these three separate pieces of fiction media that are all beloved by queer youth have in common? other than that, of course. well, buckle your seat belts, buckaroos, because this is a wild ride. TMA S5 spoilers?

so the magnus archives has shown us that there are people and places wherein certain fears are prominent, such as locations gearing up for a ritual and avatars. it is solidified in my mind that Bill Cipher is a manifestation of the spiral, similarly to the Distortion but, you know, different. Bill’s not an avatar - he’s the closest thing we get to the actual entity. when Stanford Pines makes a deal with Bill, Stanford is essentially signing on to be an avatar of the spiral in exchange for knowledge. you might be thinking that Ford should be aligned with the eye, but look at it as his thirst for knowledge leading him down paths that shouldn’t be walked down and decent into madness through that knowledge. him being an avatar of the spiral also makes sense in reference to Old Man McGucket and what happened to him. I don’t think Stanley Pines is an avatar - he’s a person who Ford almost led down a path of madness. The entirety of Gravity Falls was a moderately powerful spiral domain. I think there was also a lot of influence of other entities within Gravity Falls - the weird memory-erasing cult were the dark, that candy monster on halloween was the stranger and the extinction, the anti-teen convenience store ghosts were the slaughter and the end, etc, but the majority of Gravity Falls was centered around the spiral.

this brings me to my next point. weirdmaggedon. in my mind, weirdmaggedon Gravity Falls is a TMA fearpocalypse domain in the interception of the spiral and the extinction. It makes sense - the overall weirdness & insanity of it all, the constant fear that Bill would get out and it would be all their fault, everything fits so perfectly. 

so where does WTNV fit into this conspiracy-board level theory? It’s also a fearpocalypse domain. you heard me! if you’re asking, “but WTNV has been going on for years, and weirdmaggedon lasted 3ish days! how does that work?” well, first of all, time is fake in general, so I don’t care. second, time is canonically fake during the fearpocalypse, so it doesn’t matter. Night Vale is actually just the US, fearpocalypse style. That’s why Cecil, an obvious avatar of the eye, sits in his office presiding over Night Vale, which seems to have every avatar in it in an alternating rotation so that the entirety of the United States compressed into tiny town night vale can get their dose of extreme fear. It makes sense - if you tried hard enough, you can pick out something in Night Vale for every entity. 

This is a pretty weird hill for me to die on, but I will, so here we are.

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The Archivist: a summary

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so, Annabelle Cane's statement, huh

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one of my curses is when i see the name Michael in literally any context and i immediately, without a doubt, assume it's the zombie piglin child from the minecraft roleplay

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Spamton's an avatar of the Web (with distortion tendencies?), and he sees Kris and is like, "Oh, you've been [marked] too?"

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Julia Montauk, about to kidnap Jon in America

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Jon and Tim. one of them is roughly up to date with current memes and references and ironically does them wrong to annoy the Youths, and the other is genuinely lost in terms of memes and wouldn't be able to complete the most iconic of vine jokes. I don't know who would be funnier as what but I am VERY much leaning towards meme expert Jon

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all the reasons why i wouldn't survive tma:

1) i get distracted incredibly easily. creepy michael mcfuckhands puts on a baby sensory fruit video and i'm gone.

2) my memory has a half-life of 2 minutes. was i supposed to take a statement? sorry i already forgot.

3) if i came into possession of a coffin that urged me to open it i'd name it bobert and develop a parasocial attachment to it.

4) i flail so badly in social settings. nikola orsinov could jumpscare me in my room and i'd still be asking her for tone tags. i'd try to awkwardly compliment her outfit and somehow end up asking if she eats erasers.

5) i'm a curious gremlin. not!sasha corners me in the tunnels and i just start asking her if her table is ikea. what it's like to be the notthem. how she feels about her existence. what's her birth chart. you know, wood makes me think of rocks and rocks make me think of gems do you want to hear about gems-

6) i'd be so busy trying to get social approval from annabelle cane. or agnes montague. or michael shelley. really any avatar, actually.

7) i have no brain to mouth filter. i will either start talking about the onceler to elias bouchard or rambling about any research topic i've found info on to peter lukas.

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The magnus archives wiki is insane and i love it

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😳😳🥺🥺