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omaeda-sama:

A squeal of horror escaped Omaeda as he watched his beloved go flying to the ground, several broke upon contact with the floor, and his heart did the same. As the glorious, fatty little treats shattered, it felt to him that his spirit broke with them, and a low wail of dismay followed his initial screech. He barely noticed the release of his captain’s shikai, and in his fluster to scavenge even a few of his treats he stumbled forwards and impaled one of his many chins on the tip of the hornet’s sting. 

For several seconds, he stared with complete terror at the weapon he had pierced himself with, and his eyes almost bulged from within their sockets, craning forwards to see if the tattoo had actually formed on his flesh. 

"CAPTAIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIN! HOW COULD YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU?!" He demanded frightfully, scratching at the offending area with his hands frantically before flopping onto the floor, rolling around like a fish out of water, all the time scrabbling at the now darkened flesh in an attempt to claw the death mark from himself. "GET IT OFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF CAPTAINNNNNNNN!"

...Well, she's just going to stand there and watch that miserable heap of pathetic flesh roll around like the spoiled child he is. She paid no heed to his banter and cries, the needle now fastened to her side lest he make some other foolish attempt to throw himself directly into death. What a fool...

"Stop your crying," she muttered, though it was doubtful he would hear her through his wails. She released her shikai, slipping her blade back into its sheath, and with the disappearance of the hornet's sting, as did the mark that ripped across Omaeda's flapping neck.

"You'd think with the training I've given you, you would be more careful... idiot."

[vespinaes]

omaeda-sama:

"Mmmphmmphtain!" 

A muffled groan of agreement from within the behemoth’s maw grumbled in agreement, distorted only by the fist currently wedged inside of his face. He decided it would be wise to go about his most important duty first, which was of course feeding himself. A packet of potato chips were masterfully whipped from within the folds of his robe after she removed her fist from his features, and as a means to thanking his captain for her insightful advice he extended the packet towards her. 

"You first, captain!"

"..."

Of course. Well, why waste such a prime opportunity? She's simply going to grasp the entire packet so generously offered and rip it, letting the chips fly and fumble to the ground, much akin to Omaeda's work ethic as of late. But before the oaf could throw himself to the ground and accumulate his forsaken 'treat', she muttered beneath her breath, "Jinteki Shakusetsu, Suzumebachi."

The golden needle was then placed at his overlapping throat, glaring at him in tired fashion. "I said get to work. Stop stuffing your face, you buffoon."

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omaeda-sama:

"Yeeeeeeeees captainnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn?"

Leans in nice and close, fully convinced that he’s going to receive some form of praise for being generally fantastic.

"..."

"Stop fooling around like a useless child and get to work."

Generally fantastic at avoiding his duties, maybe.

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"...Omaeda."

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I just came to see how my favorite bumblebee was doing. [ Headrubrub. ] Make sure you don't work too hard. You don't want to turn into Byakuya-bo and be boring and constipated, right?

"...No, of course not Yoruichi-sama." Of course she doesn't mind the affection, but a tint of red brushes across her cheeks in slight embarrassment regardless. "You've been faring well?"

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Bumblebee.

"--Ah, Y-Yoruichi-sama! Is there-- is there something you need?"

[vespinaes]

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Bleach Volume Poem 18: The Deathberry Returns

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sakura-samurai:

"… You’re tryin’ really hard to hurt my feelings tonight, Suì-Fēng-san~"

"...Just make sure you finish your work-- ...commander."

[vespinaes]

sakura-samurai:

"Or it might be because I’m very charmin’."

"Oh? I was thinking more along the lines of you both being lazy fools."

[vespinaes]

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sakura-samurai:

"I got most of it done!"

"T'ch. It's no wonder you and that brute get along so well."

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sakura-samurai:

"… Enough."

"The commander should complete all of his work before playing."

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WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE INANIMATE OBJECT?

"Suzumebachi, and I’ll be displaying just why she is my favorite should you not leave immediately.”