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tiktok is fr dead lol wtf

apparently they're gonna "work with trump to get it back" whatever that means

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wholesome thread (src)

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Hey. Your brain needs to de-frag. Literally it needs you to sit there and space out.

If you want your memory or executive function to improve, stare out a window at the skyline or sidewalk or trees or birds on the electrical wires for like 20+ minutes per day. (With no other stimulation like a podcast or TV if you can manage but hey baby steps innit). If you're fortunate enough to have safe outside with any bits of nature, go stare closely at a 1 meter square of grass and trip out on the bugs and shapes of grasses and stuff.

Literally this will make you smarter. Our brains HAVE TO HAVE this zone out time to do important stuff behind the scenes. This does not happen during sleep, it's something else.

That weird pressurized feeling you get sometimes might be your brain on no defrag.

Give your brain a Daily Dose Of De-Frag.

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Modern things that I think Dionysus is the patron god of:

assless chaps

gnc men

mechanical bulls

television

grape flavored candy and soda

juggalos

deadheads

weed

gas station cigars

trans masc people

antidepressants

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CACKLING at this malapropism

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if you're in your 20s just remember that you're in your 20s and being in your 20s is like being anywhere between 20-29

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this meeting could have been a car crash

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i invented a machine that transcribes the inner thoughts of oysters and it turns out the first oyster i tested it on was thinking like "beautiful human woman riding a bike i am the bike i am the bike"and i tested it on more oysters and it was all "delicious sediment" "my mucous membrane itchy" "i wish to digest particles" so i guess that one guy was just real horny

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“Raw milk is better for you as long as you boil it” so true bestie now imagine if we could like. Super boil it. To really get all the bacteria out. And if we could do that quickly and efficiently. Imagine that.

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bro your whimsy. you forgot your fucking whimsy. your solemn and somber attitude is scaring the hoes

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Fast doodle of the adventure-loving besties and their turned-human hubbies ♥

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90s movies: Psychopharmacology is as good as a lobotomy. If you take pills to treat your mental illness it will literally murder your imaginary friends and you will become a boring, lotus-eating conformist drone.

Me after taking my meds: drives the scenic route home to see if there are any geese on the pond and does a little dance in line at the grocery store and comes home to throw everything​ in my fridge into a stew pot because I can finally taste food again while singing songs at my birds in which I replace all the instances of "she" with "Cheese" and doing a Dolly Parton impression on the phone to my sister

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No no you don't understand! I want to watch this show/movie, read this book, listen to this podcast, etc.! But I must be in the right mindset and the exact head space to begin, or I just can't!

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My little sister's new boyfriend got a tattoo for her about a month ago and he wanted matching tattoos so he decided to get uh. The tattoo on her ankle of her ex boyfriend's name that she hasn't gotten covered up yet