vanessaroseletters-blog - Tumblr blog

[vanessaroseletters-blog]

I think about this solo all the time.  It makes me think of all the different layers, skins, personalities we clothe ourselves in thinking they are some sort of protection.  That dancing with our backs to the audience puts us in control.  That we have control.  

Meanwhile our vulnerable and capable ape bodies reveal it all.  The insecurities, the neuroticism, the beauty, the humor.  

I draw away from this piece with an epiphany: In the end, it doesn't matter how much you try to weigh yourself down with other's ideas of who you ought to be, or entrench yourself into consumerism as identity, or that you create false paradigms so that you feel some iota of control.  Because, underneath all the SHIT, you are still this fragile, divine animal.  And you are kidding yourself if other people don't see that.  

You are still you beneath the "wit" and forced beauty and trained body, and everyone can connect to that, if you just let them.  We put on more and more layers, we drive ourselves insane trying to be unique and loveable and accepted and comfortable.  And yet, through this ridiculous external charade, the beauty is finding out who you really are within.  

That pure, unlimited, writhing, fearful, childish and magical animal underneath.

And when you get enough out of your way, you have access (access also being awareness of) to this animal at all times.  This animal that is more you than you are, hah:).  Although you will no doubt put on layer after layer to appease and cooperate and function in our bizarrely rigid reality, you gotta hold onto your WILD and your NAKED and your REALNESS.  

Don't let them take it away from you.  

It's what you got, and if you are not in touch with it, it (this animal force) is with you and is powering/motivating/manipulating you in ways you aren't even aware of.  Just like the dancer in this piece (Lisa Race), you will still have the frenetic animal impulse, but if you are not listening to it, aware of it's presence (and conscientious enough to watch and notice and only involve it in however much you decide), you will act out unknowingly weighed down by suffocating layers. 

So you be you!  Get in touch with your inner monkey!

[vanessaroseletters-blog]

So I'm going to switch up this blog to make it more about dance and the arts in general, and less about writing.  I realize that Tumblr is a place to share rad art, so I will be taking my literary efforts elsewhere.