vampire-connoisseur

[vampire-connoisseur]

Old people love to own two identical ugly as shit dogs

[vampire-connoisseur]

So we've been having a bit of a debate in the office because we wanted to do the headline "Local man gives up sugar for 12 minutes" but then overdoing the "local man" trope is a bit male-centric, so we considered "Local woman" but then that sounds like we're typecasting women so that wasn't great either, but I think we've finally found a worthy compromise:

[vampire-connoisseur]

[vampire-connoisseur]

You fucking wish the author was dead. The author is on twitter

[vampire-connoisseur]

Desperately want a garashir fic that is the inverse of the Our Man Bashir episode. Julian sneaks into Garak's holosuite program thats basically just a medical drama

[vampire-connoisseur]

(Star Trek Voyager: Season 1 Episode 6)

I wish I could think of a better way to word this but Harry Kim can be such a little shit (meant affectionately) when he wants to be?!

The fact that we only see Tuvok simulate killing one of his co-workers is a testament to his endurance.

[vampire-connoisseur]

>random guy in shit tier iron armor shows up one day saying a dragon is burning down a city >don’t know why the guards let him in >figure I can throw another body at my court wizard so I shuffle him over >Comes back with arrows sticking out of his body and holding the tablet out for my court wizard like its nothing >Hear reports someone killed literally every bandit, rat, wolf, and rabbit between here and the spot he was sent >I now need to get this pain immune lunatic murderer out of my city. >Dragon shows up >Ohthankthegods >Send the guy out on a suicide mission to kill a dragon >End of my worries >He comes back, apparently having killed the dragon and eaten its soul >According to reports just stood there and let the dragon burn him while chugging addictive and dangerous health potions he made himself. >Now standing in front of me eating an entire bushel of apples, two loaves of bread, and an entire side of beef while everyone looks on in horror and disgust >Need to get him away from my children as fast as possible >Tell him he needs to climb the tallest mountain in Skyrim and stay with the Graybeards >He leaves without a word >Hopefully thats the last I’ll see of him.

[vampire-connoisseur]

My boyfriend just woke up, mostly still asleep and told me “don’t worry, it’s getting better” in a heavy, American accent, which is unusual for an Australian man.

“Why are you American?” I asked, to which I got:

“Sorry, it’s getting better” in a stereotypical posh English accent.

“Why are you English?” I asked, amused.

“What is he normally?” He managed to ask.

“He? You’re not anyone else, you’re you.”

“Ugh, me” was the last thing he said, in a right proper Aussie accent before he fell back into proper sleep.

[vampire-connoisseur]

"And lo, the maiden fair did offer up her love unto the beast and with him lay in close embrace until the first cock crow." — NOSFERATU (2024), dir. Robert Eggers

[vampire-connoisseur]

im loving this article written by som mycologists who accidentally got high as fuck on fly agaric

[vampire-connoisseur]

I wouldn't say I'm a lapsed cultist. I still accept the basic worldview--I believe that Cthulhu lies in R'lyeh in a deathlike sleep, I believe his Star-spawn shall one day cleanse the earth and usher in an age of shouting and killing and reveling in joy, yada yada--but I'm not, y'know, religious about it. Cthulhu has lied sleeping for, like, countless aeons, he's probably not waking up in my lifetime. I doubt giving up my Friday nights to chant "Cthulhu fhtagn" with a bunch of naked old guys in a basement is gonna wake him up any faster. I mean, if I ever have kids, I'll probably start going again, but that's more about teaching good morals.

[vampire-connoisseur]

how do you differentiate addressals/titles between maternal and paternal grandparents?

different languages

my language distinguishes it by default (eg chinese, swedish, etc)

different nicknames in the same language

I don't differentiate them

results/nuance/other/I don't address my grandparents

[vampire-connoisseur]

[vampire-connoisseur]

Pierogi pillows

[vampire-connoisseur]

Creating a marble sculpture Joey Marcella Link to full vid in comments

[vampire-connoisseur]

SLEPT THROUGH THE TIME WHEN I CAN GET FOOD BECAUSE MY PHONE DIED BECAUSE MY ROOMMATE BROKE MY CHARGER so that means either I DONT eat and ill have had 1 meal total in FOUR DAYS or I DO eat and I have NOODLE AND HOT SAUCE SOUP AGAINNNNNNNNNNNN

[vampire-connoisseur]

https://www.tumblr.com/verdantelf/776149090879913984/i-am-bitter-people-are-understandably-upset-at-my?source=share

didn't know if you'd seen this new post about it lol

i am passionate about arguing against "vegan" leather (WHICH IS PLASTIC) however i calmly accept that this is very annoying to most people. considering the number of notes that first poll situation got i suspect many, many other people are also annoying about the subject.