uu-witch

[uu-witch]

A Welcoming Congregation

When I was a child, my family was part of a nondenominational church. I don’t remember too much about it, but the things I do remember were all moments of joy. I remember singing with my mom, dancing in the isles and next to the ‘stage’ with the other kids, raising my hands in praise, and - most importantly to little kid me - donuts and orange juice in between 1st and 2nd service. I loved being in that place of happiness and worship with my mom.

And then my parents got a divorce. And as mom is/was a stepmom, I moved out with my dad. This was, at least, 20 years ago, and she is still (as she always will be) my mom. I’m very lucky to have such a wonderful relationship with this woman who I bonded so strongly with though she is not my blood mother. Unfortunately, I never found that bond with another Christian place again. It wasn’t because of the divorce or the move, it was because I was growing older and realizing pieces of me would never again fit in that place. It took me a long time to realize that didn’t mean there was anything wrong with me, but I have finally come to terms with that.

I bounced around through various churches from that time until I was a teenager. I was starting to learn more about the world and myself and was having a very hard time dealing with the fact that not only was (am) I gay, but that the religion that once comforted me as a child was no longer what I was able to seek comfort from. I didn’t even know how to say the word gay at the church - it felt like the ultimate sin. So when I ‘came out’ to my neighbor, who was the woman that took me to church with her kids, I instead showed her a picture of two women together (amusingly enough, I’m fairly certain it was of TATU) and said something along the lines of “I think I’m like them.”

I was told it wasn’t okay. But I didn’t have to be told, I knew it wasn’t okay.

She also told me dad, and I’m fairly certain that’s the last time I went to that church. I went to other churches after that, but it was only due to a friend going and asking me to tag along. My heart was never in it.

Around this time, a new girl started at a school. I didn’t like her, I was a jealous teen and she my best friend at the time spent more time with her than me. Funny the things that felt like at the end of the world to teen me and has zero influence on anything now a days. One thing about her interested me however, she was a Wiccan. I’d never heard about that before (aside from in the Craft but I’m not counting that) but the more I looked in to it, the more I was interested.

I came home one day with a book she lent me to read, and my dad about hulk smashed the world to pieces when he saw it in my backpack. I don’t remember the whole conversation now, but it was your typical bs. I was going to go to hell, something about those people having sex while doing spells, etc etc etc. I was never to bring that in to the house again.

I’m sure like most parents he thought it was a phase. I never ‘grew out’ of either though, but at least I’m not wearing all the black clothes that were part of my teenage years. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with people of any age that dress gothic/punk or any other word that’s used now a days as I had - but it’s hot af where I live and I just don’t know how I use to do it.

But I digress..

I still live with him, and I’m very grateful that he allows me to considering I’m in my thirties. But I’m constantly worried he’s going to stumble across one of my maaaany books on Paganism, Witchcraft, Wicca, Spells, etc. I try to keep them in my closet where he’d never have a reason to look in.

A few years ago, I stumbled across a local Pagan group. I was so excited. People who thought the way I did FINALLY. Granted we all had different approaches to our Paganism, that didn’t matter. I went to a few meetings of theirs and open rituals. The favorite of mine being a ritual on the beach when, as we were calling corners, the waves that had not been there before rushed over us and almost knocked our very unstable tv dinner tray alter tables over while we called to water. That wasn’t the only interesting ritual we had though, the most interesting in my opinion at the time, was the one we had at a church.

A church. Welcoming Pagans in to their holy space, to hold ritual.

A church with a gay pride flag out front, black lives matter stickers on the door, and bathrooms with signs stating to use the restroom of your choice.

Wtf kinda weird ass church is this. Don’t they know these things aren’t welcome here?

This was my first introduction to a UU church. I started going with that group to the few rituals held at the church, and then slowly started going to the church itself without the group. A Sunday every few months, just popping in and out of boredom more than anything, but as I learned about the people in the church and their very eclectic views, I began to embrace the church. I’ve been a member for about a year now and can’t imagine being anywhere else.

This place, though they are nothing like the church I was raised in, fills my heart with the same feeling of love and worship as that church has. Which is quite interesting when thinking about the fact that our sermons have very little to do with worship most times.

When I first started going on a more regular basis, my father asked me what they believed in. It was hard for me to answer since I didn’t have a full understanding at the time. “Nothing and everything” was not a good answer but it’s the easiest imo. I even dragged him along with me once, for an Easter service. I thought it was a great service, but when one of the speakers said something along the lines of “Jesus is never coming back” I knew he’d never come back. And he never has. (Except for outside of service when we had a chili cookoff)

As for myself however, I’ve volunteered for a while in their kitchen, then became a member, started volunteering with the kids, and will soon become a spirit play teacher.

Every Sunday during service we are told that this is a ‘welcoming congregation’ and it truly is. I feel at home. And not because I’m running from religion and hoping if I knock on another door that gay/witchcraft will be okay, but because I have learned that these things were never wrong to begin with and found the place that embraces all parts of my being and of the congregation as a whole while I embrace them as well.

Lately, I have been doing a lot with Journey Circles and Workshops offered through the church and expect to be doing more with the kids as well in Spirit Play and wanted a place where I could just journal things out that would be much faster than writing in an actual journal. This novel of a post for example would of taken much longer on paper, so I turned to Tumblr. My old teenage stomping grounds. Honestly, I was surprised to see it hadn’t fallen away like MySpace had..but here we are.

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