unwashedblanket
6 posts
she/him sad weird boygirlthing,,, secret sideblog where i complain scream andor cry
Last active 4 hours ago
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i'm scared & only holding on by distracting myself. i keep feeling like this has to all just be some nightmare, i have to wake up soon- i have to. but i dont. i never do. it's real as can be, and i know on main im constantly posting those hotlines and talking about how suicide isnt the answer in this situation, despite how horrible. but i feel like its my only answer. i don't know how much i want to live. how much i want to grow up and navigate a life in a nation that is only falling more and more to facism.
#i will though#im too much of a coward to kill myself or anything#tw sui ideation#tw suicide#tw sui vent#tw suic1de
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I think some of you forgot that autistic people sometimes act strange and say things that are poorly worded and speak with incorrect tone and misunderstand or miss social cues because they are autistic
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took a shower for the first time in a week!! yay! still need to do laundry so i can have clean sheets and clothes tomorrow, but im slowly making progress. hopefully ill have energy to sort of clean up my room tomorrow
#accomplishments#baby steps but still accomplisments#i think ill even get around to brushing my teeth tonight
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me fighting the urge to be such a bitch to someone bc i'm overstimulated and anxious
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whywhywhywhywhywhywhy have i become so mean? i promise you i love you i didnt mean it pleasepleaseplease come back im sorry don't hate me please hate me i'm bad i'm awful you shouldn't have me in your life but please stay
#i don't know when#but sometime last year i think i realized how loved i was#how wonderful my partner my friends sometimes my family -- my life was#it scared me. it scares me. i dont deserve kindness#i grew bitter and cruel and now i am nothing but#my friends know me as mean. as a bitch. my partner says i'm an asshole#i want to stop please make me stop#i dont know why i bite
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I don’t want to get sexualized. But if you don’t Sexualize me then you don’t love me. That’s how it goes right? People only love me when they sexualize me right? They only want me when I show off my body.
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