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“When real life ain’t nothin’ but anger and doubt and failures a stranger we all dream about”
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Why did I think I could be a good partner?
I had multiple men cheat on me.. and now that I think about it.. it makes perfect sense why they cheated. They probably saw me after a few weeks and thought “this isn’t worth my time, but I’ll just stay for the sex” and that’s all I was. All I’m good for.
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“Part of me just dies, peeling me out of my skin”
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I think today is the day I’ll die.
If anyone reads this, know it wasn’t your fault. I’m so unsatisfied with myself. With who I am. And I can’t keep going. I can’t keep making the same mistake over and over and over. I look at those who I keep hurting, who trust me, who would beg me to stop if they could, and they are suffering. Because something is wrong with ME. I am the problem. And I know what everyone says “imagine those who would miss you.” I am thinking of those who would miss me and they would move on. But at least without me physically here, they could. If I’m still here, if I still have my poison running through their veins, how will they even take 1 step forward?
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